%% You mean the net is NOT real life???? Boy, are there going to be some VERY disappointed people.... -- SoSweet Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 1996 %% > [bitches to] the government for they screw us in the ass, which is > probably one reason why i wont vote this fall That's brilliant. I guess it hasn't occurred to you that the only way to get rid of those who are doing the ass screwing is to VOTE THEM OUT. -- TheRock Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 1996 %% > > However, the time has come for PC applications to beat the shit out of > > UNIX applications. Not to mention UNIX itself. > > now them's fightin werds... I couldn't stop laughing long enough to think about fighting... -- Warf, Dweezil and TheRock Eagle's Nest BBS, June 1996 %% berries: sorry i took so long..was accosted by a bbq sandwich... -- berries in chat Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 June 1996 %% jaymee: al i thought your hair didn't rock AlBundy: Jaymee's hair rocks and Billy's hair is unplugged... -- jaymee and AlBundy Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 June 1996 %% Cerberus: marcie - hark. using me for sex? for shame. do it more. -- Cerberus Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 1996 %% This is an Olympic sport? I watched it, looking at these girls twirling ribbons and tossing balls in the air. For a second, I thought they were synchronized swimmers who had beached themselves. -- wobboh1, on rhythmic gymnastics in the Olympics Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 August 1996 %% wob: something was being weird llama: is that a technical explanation of the problem? -- wob and llama Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 September 1997 %% Courtney: i have gas, do you still love me? unsane: oh jaesus, that stinks Courtney: hahahha Courtney: *wafts* marcie: i can see why you & kevin get along so well, courtney Courtney: haha why? marcie: wafting :) Courtney: HAHAHHA -- Courtney showing off her bodily functions Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 September 1997 %% Cyrano: you know Cyrano: I never thought I'd get paid for sorting through porn llama: sorting through porn for a living has always been my dream job llama: ever since i was 14, anyway -- Cyrano and llama doing guy bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 1997 %% Jane: you know Jane: i just realized how corrupt you guys are :) marcie: yeah... ain't it grand? Jane: yeah hehe wob: and there is something wrong w/ corruption? Jane: well not if its what yer used to :P -- the resident perverts in chat Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 1997 %% meg: this is like the fourth instance in ths past week that some world situation or evennt is different to slay than it is to any of the rest of us -- meg Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 November 1997 %% Slayer: BlueKing: so slayer...where are you from? Slayer: mexicans: Slayer's from hell. Slayer: i love being a legend -- Slayer, of fame and legend Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 1997 %% saundo: dweez saundo: stop masturbating *** dweez has been disconnected marcie: HAHAHAHAHA saundo: HAHARHAHRHARhAHRHARhaHrAHRhAHRhARHAHRHARhAHRHARH -- saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 1997 %% Mistress snuggles against Slayer. Slayer: i want grilled cheese -- Mis and Slay Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 1997 %% Saundo: I'm tempted to beat off just for the excitement value marcie: HAHAHAHAHAH marcie: yer bored, aren't you. Saundo: 100% -- saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 1997 %% saundo: "You realise, that if you speak french, I will have to bowl you over in a frenzy of clothes tearing and toungue lashing" saundo: "Oui" -- saundo trying to seduce me in chat Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 December 1997 %% Al: why the fuqq does windows seek my floppy drive every time I resize the desktop ? Saundo: I have no fucking idea Saundo: I think it's lonely -- saundo's wisdom in chat Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 December 1997 %% Slayer: im netsexing you, pay attention -- Slayer vying for attention yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 December 1997 %% miri: you suck Slay Slayer: well im sorry Slayer: last thing i saw was when i said that shit about black sapphires miri: damnit I was telling you the meaning of life and now its gone -- miri and Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 1997 %% Saundo: guiness is drunk by the US marines who are guarding the streets of heaven -- Saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 1998 %% wob: james likes to impress all the girlies Cyrano: oh yah Cyrano: that studly astronomy knowledge just knocks 'em out Cyrano: I learned that and I was able to stop using chloroform wob: HAHAHAAH Saundo: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA -- the g33k boyz in chat Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 January 1998 %% llama: do they actually pay you to fuck their machines up or is this just a hobby? -- llama Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 1998 %% Saundo: It was over my head, wrapped around one arm and RIGHT up the crack -- Saundo (and we DON'T want to know) Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 1998 %% Saundo: least I can WRITE my name in snow Jane: ooh Saundo: in fact, I can sign my name in snow :) Jane: i wanna do that Saundo: follow your dreams, jane -- Saundo and Jane Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 1998 %% Saundo: some sick fuck put a postit on my screen one AM Saundo: and I fucking tried to move it for 10 minutes [with the mouse] Saundo: I was NOT awake wob: HAHAHAHAH marcie: hahahaAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Saundo: I figured it out eventually Saundo: then I nuked that fucknuts machine -- Saundo displaying great intellect Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 1998 %% Outlaw: you know, I think Grape Crush is one of the most underrated sodas of all time -- Outlaw Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 1998 %% Saundo: ethernet Manuka: russian: ethernyet? Saundo: no Saundo: that'd be russian for token ring -- Saundo and Manuka Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 1998 %% Cerberus: oh, we have monday off Cerberus: I forgot the rest of the world doesn't Cerberus: yeah, we are celebrating the invention of the vagina Saundo: :) Saundo: excellent Cerberus: the best thing Man has ever found (and it just happens to be in a woman) Saundo: how come we don't have cool holidays like that? :) Cerberus: I'm going to help celebrate by invading one as afast as I can Cerberus: repeatedly Cerberus: :) -- Cerb and Saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 1998 %% Cerberus: I wrote a script for a class once Cerberus: and I used named of EN people as all my variables Saundo: heheheheheh marcie: heheheheh Cerberus: and i had beavis and butt head expressions as names for my functions Cerberus: I_need_tp_for_my_bungole (int TheRock, char *dweez) { Cerberus: ... Cerberus: it ruled Cerberus: I got the assignment back, perfect score, and a note from my prof saying "I have a good phone number if you need someone to talk to" Cerberus: afte rthat, the semester was a breeze Cerberus: hey - I was bored Cerberus: I turned in one assignment Saundo: I can tell :) Cerberus: where all of my variables were Cerberus: variations on the word potato Cerberus: "potatoe" "potate" "potato" "potatoes" "frenchfries" "potatochips" Cerberus: etc Cerberus: my prof asked me if I was getting enough starch in my diet -- Cerb giving coding tips Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 1998 %% Saundo: she's good wob Saundo: she's almost g33k marcie: she can even laugh g33k Lisa: add a few h's Lisa: add a few a's Lisa: a r now and then Lisa: im awsome wob: hahahhaah wob: that rules. Lisa: it does wob: we will train her wisely wob: and show her the ways of the force marcie: yes marcie: train her in the ways of the g33k Lisa: train me to become one with the g33ks Saundo: we will entrust her with the ways of the LART marcie: you have mu ch to learn, young skywalker Saundo: Why do I feel like 0b1 1 k3n0b1 now? Lisa: i must use teh force wob: cuz you are, pinhead Saundo: "No "try", there is inly "do" and "LART" marcie snorks Lisa: you guys are really bad trainers Lisa: sorry to say Lisa: but its true marcie: hahahahaHAHAHAHAHA Saundo: hell no Lisa: hell yah Saundo: you're learning the way we did marcie: it's a zen thing marcie: turn up the mantras Saundo: and if you thing "man" will get you one, it's hopeless Lisa: hrm Saundo: ooooh yes marcie: especially the one entitled "heqad like a hole" Saundo: mantras marcie: head, too wob: heh marcie: :) Saundo: :jesus built my hotrod" marcie: hahahahahah YES -- the g33k gooroos training a young Jedi Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 1998 %% wob: i did NT admin for 1.5 years wob: that was enuff Saundo: heh wob: i am now going bald because of it wob: I HAVE PROOF -- wob Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 1998 %% dweez unleashes wob's SSToD on slay marcie: *buzzz buzzz* Slayer: sweet and sour tww of death? marcie: HARhAHRARHARHRaRhAHRaRHaRHARARarHArharHAHRAHR -- g33kz in chat Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 1998 %% Slayer: goddamned wet cat running on my legs trying to get petted marcie: hahahahaha marcie: slay, i've never known you to turn down a wet pussy marcie ducks and RUNS Slayer trips marcie and beats the fuck out of her miri: hahahahahHAHAHAHahahahaahah Slayer throws things at miri too marcie: AHrAhrahrAhraHarHArHArHAR Cyrano: pahahahahah Cyrano: good one marcie: gosh miri is still laughing marcie: that was terribly vulgar of me, wasn't it? marcie: oh well Cyrano: hey Cyrano: when you see opportunity marcie: so true, jamez -- the resident perverts yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 1998 %% saundo: one of my lusers is hopping down the hallway saundo: this is most disturbing -- Saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 02 February 1998 %% st0n3d: BE ASS FILTERED st0n3d: RESISTANCE IS FUTILE Renee: haha st0n3d: YOU WILL BECOME ONE OF THE ASSFILTERED COB Renee: i'd love to visit your planet wob -- w0b & renee Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 April 1998 %% meg: robert's not apethetic he just don't give a fuck -- meg Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 April 1998 %% meg: and here's our king bitch wob: fuck you all -- meg and w0b Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 May 1998 %% Cyrano: so meg, think you'll be able to stand geek central? meg: james, it's gonna be like living w/ ren and stimpy -- meg on she and wob living with wozzeck Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 May 1998 %% saundo: gah saundo: iz fucking raining saundo: I hate rain saundo: I mean it's cool to fill up resevoirs and schtuff saundo: but falling on me? saundo: nah-uh marcie: how dare it marcie: :) marcie: the gall of some gods saundo: I shall subvert the weather to BOFH will marcie: yes marcie: you shall saundo: "Now look, Gaia, enough with the fucking rain." saundo: "Or I will LART your pretty little oceeans from here to eternity" -- Saundo being BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 May 1998 %% IndyJ: how the fuck are YOU? saundo: I am FUCKING good saundo: :-) IndyJ: thats fucking great man saundo: wahahahah saundo: you dork :-) marcie: another conversation of typical intelligence on EN :) IndyJ: sorry, i was trying to be k for a minute heh -- the boyz Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 May 1998 %% Saundo: you need the idiots guide to the uidiots guide to computers Saundo: it has hand puppets -- Saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 May 1998 %% marcie: so marcie: saundo marcie: are you nekkid? :) tish: that's our marcie tish: always indirect and proper tish: ;) marcie bows -- marcie and tish Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 June 1998 %% Lisa: you know cheese is a very important factor for everyones future? Al: how so ? marcie: is it? Lisa: b/c if we didnt have cheese mice would starve out and die Al: uh no. Lisa: then cats cant case them around or eat them so the starve Lisa: just listen Lisa: then dogs cant chase any cat so they get obese and die Lisa: there goes mans best friend Lisa: men die Al: haha Lisa: women rule Lisa: but only for a short time Lisa: by means of reporduction Lisa: and buh bye earth Lisa: thats my shortened version Al: you left out turkey basters and frozen donations Lisa: it just slipped my mind Lisa: my bad -- lisa being philosophical Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 1998 %% marcie: hehe marcie: hey baby :) akunam: yeh marcie slaps manuka to set him straight *** akunam is now known as mukana marcie hmmms marcie slaps manuka once more *** mukana is now known as aakmnu marcie spins manuka around once and THEN slaps him aakmnu: dammit, I'm now in alphabetical order *** aakmnu is now known as 10001100 marcie: hahahahahah 10001100: shit. binary now marcie: hmm marcie: this will take some doing 10001100: . o O (that's what you get for smacking me into a qmail queue) marcie tosses manuka up in the air, spins him around TWICE, punts him once and slaps him three times *** 10001100 is now known as manuak Courtney: akuna matta manuak: woo. almost marcie: hmm, almost Slayer: boo manuak jumps *** manuak is now known as mkunaa Slayer: whats up mkunaa: dammit, slayer mkunaa: marcie almost had me unscrambled mkunaa: and you had to go fuck it up mkunaa punts slayer marcie: we really don't plan these things, you know :) -- Manuka being silly Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 1998 %% Al will arm-wrestle marcie for lisa marcie: dat's right Lisa: dont anyone ruin this moment cause i feel loved and stuff -- lisa getting an ego boost Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 June 1998 %% Lisa: STOP THE INSANITY! *** Monty has entered room 'Main' Lisa: how ironic -- lisa imitating Alanis Morrisette Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 June 1998 %% Manuka: me have sammich for sweetie Manuka: me go bring food Manuka: *grunt* marcie: ahahaha marcie: you're so cute :) marcie pinches manuka's cheeks Manuka: me fight saber-toothed tiger to get sammich *ungrt* marcie smirks Manuka: OK, so he was a fluffy kitty. so what -- Manuka being all studly Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 June 1998 %% Al: lookit marcie f'rinstance... Al: she's almost normal. marcie: *snerk* marcie: almost being the key word here Lisa: am i normal? Al: yes, but we're working on you. Lisa: ah -- lisa being educated Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 June 1998 %% IndyJ: lisa is mature for her age-it usually takes 10-15 years of abusive relationships for a woman to have her kind of sexual baggage -- IndyJ Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 1998 %% IndyJ: weve replaced lisa's regular coffee crystals with crystal meth..lets see if she notices -- IndyJ observing lisa Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 1998 %% marcie: need a nick for woman with attitude RayRay: hmmmm RayRay: hold on, i need another drink for this marcie: wahahahahaha marcie: that's MY little sister, y'all -- marcie as the proud big sister Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 1998 %% Courtney: is 19 kid? afk: compared to marcie afk: yes afk: :)_ marcie: HEY NOW Courtney: well marce is my pimp Courtney: she has to be older marcie: oh yeah marcie: i am -- lisa, marcie and Courtney Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 1998 %% Lisa: W3RD marcie: um marcie hits lisa over the head and watches her slump to the floor marcie: all better now -- marcie taking good care of lisa Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 June 1998 %% T: man, things got quiet all of a sudden... marcie: i was netsexing lisa marcie: sorry marcie: :) Lisa: dammit marcie Lisa: dont tell everyone -- lisa getting embarrassed Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 1998 %% saundo: i appear to have eaten all my pens -- saundo being sleep-deprived Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 1998 %% saundo: oh dear saundo: I am a fucked up person :-) -- saundo on reading this quotes file Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 1998 %% Mistress: ice cream with hot fudge, wet walnuts, whip cream and cherries marcie: that's not a sundae, that's a recipe for really hot sex Mistress: I forgot to mention that I wanted to eat this off of your breasts marcie drops her screwdriver -- Mistress seducing marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 1998 %% Mistress: bah..she walks in, bitches that it's hot, grabs a magazine and heads off to the bathrom Mistress: why do I feel like I'm living with a man? -- Mistress complaining about her girlfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 1998 %% IndyJ: i knew a girl who wore vanilla for her perfume IndyJ: didnt turn me on, but i was jonesing for a cookie whenever i saw her -- IndyJ Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 1998 %% opus: lisa, would oyu have a problem with attacking a number of very select countreis and states for personal graitfication? Lisa: uhm Lisa: is this a trick question? -- lisa getting suspicious Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 1998 %% RayRay: Argentina opus: why? RayRay: that madonna movie opus: damnit, argentina is going DOWN -- the geeks discussing what country to blow up first Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 1998 %% Slayer: id say some down and get stoned and we'd fuck like bunnies, but we might wake my gf RayRay: except for the cameras in the garage -- slayer seducing RayRay Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 1998 %% marcie: POS hotjava fucking gawddamn motherfucker shitfaced excuse for a browswer Saundo: wahahhaha Saundo: don't hold back, marcie Saundo: tell us what you really think :-) -- marcie (once more, with FEELING) Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 1998 %% Mistress: tTHE HILLS ARE ALIVE...... Mistress: the hills are alive! Mistress: they are attacking Mistress: RUN for you lives! Mistress spazzes out marcie: HAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAA Mistress: they're moving! woo..the colors...the hils are breathing Saundo: "godamn hills. Last time we hadda knock em all over" Mistress: hmm..we've secretly replaced moni's diet coke with lsd..let's see if she notices Saundo: taste the colours Mistress: wow man Saundo: wahahahahah Saundo: damn Saundo: you found out Mistress: like..breathing hills Mistress: kewl Mistress: bad time to be studing the ink blot test Mistress: THE CARDS ARE MOVING! Mistress: they're looking at me Saundo: wahahahah Mistress: ink spilling out over the edges of the card Saundo: "no, like, man, don't hurt the blobs man.... the blobs are you friends..." Saundo flashes the peace sign Saundo flashes Mistress: WOOP Mistress quietly slips saundo a little bule pill Mistress: er Mistress: blue Saundo: WOO Saundo: "Out out, demons of fertility!" Saundo: etc Mistress: ROFL Saundo: *ahem* Mistress: okie Mistress: i am better now -- Mistress going crazy Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 1998 %% *Ray* yeah, a couple got too bitchy, so i just put their asses on hold and ignored them for a bit *Ray* i'm a temp, what are they gonna do, fire me? *Ray* then one of them would have to answer the damn phone -- RayRay displaying customer service skills Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 1998 %% wob: i have oc-12 sonet ring in house wob: plus 6 ds-3's wob: i fucking rock. saundo: your tww just gained another mm wob: yes it did -- w0b being manly Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 June 1998 %% saundo: it is a delight saundo: if I could have sex with any food, and want to have it's children, it'd be sushi miri: what would saundo-sushi babies look like? saundo: kinda like dead spermatozoa saundo: i'm guessing saundo: saundo: Anyway saundo: enough about me and unnatural acts with delightfully prepared raw fish saundo: fun thoa subject it is -- saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 1998 %% saundo: well fuck them saundo: FUCK them saundo: F U C K T H E M saundo: bedn them over, saundo: throw away the lube saundo: get out the 12" diameter dong of enlightenment saundo: and THEEEERUST saundo: and LART soem LATEX cloos into them saundo: I need to get drunk saundo: right NOW saundo: they never stop saundo: i see the little blinky hold light go on saundo: and I know it'll be alison putting through one of my lusers saundo: and I cringe and die a little inside saundo: and I let them sit for a couple of minutes while i knock back another slug of tequila saundo: then I pick up the phone and be nice to them, even though my brain is telling them to GET A FUCKING CLUE saundo: and then I tell them "no problems", accept their worship of me, and pour another shot, ready for the next bout of fucked up cluelessness saundo: this is how tech support should be run saundo: I'd drink a lot of tequila tho saundo: *slam* "Tech support, what the HELL do you want?" saundo: "Can I just put you on hold, I need to throw up and put a new keg on" saundo: "I'm sorry, I have a call on the other line, may I put you on hold? It's Mr Jack Daniels" Al: haha Al: werd to yer shotglass saundo: yes saundo: YEStech support survival kit saundo: 1 item: saundo: Jack Daniels, 43 gallons saundo: Leather man tools saundo: and a razor blade saundo: Down not across saundo: wahahahahah -- saundo on a serious rant Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 1998 %% guest: how to quit? you know? miri: ctrl alt delete marcie: ctrl-alt-delete -- the girlz being mean Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 1998 %% Lisa: slay you dont chat very much Slayer: sorry, i was waiting for you to tell me your breast size -- slayer being himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 1998 %% opus: is this place more fun over here? miri: sometimes miri: sometimes not opus: well I meant is it more fun right now miri: depends on whos drunk -- miri speaks the truth Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 1998 %% Slayer whips his penis out marcie: IMAGINE -- Slayer and marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 June 1998 %% Mistress: no beer was harmed during this sexual act -- Mistress Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 June 1998 %% Renee: can someone tell me how to get the eyes off this stupid machine? miri: eyes? Renee: "xeyes" marcie: ahahahahahahahahahhaahhaa marcie: it's following you, is it? Renee: yes. and its stretched to fuck and its annoying marcie: wahahahhahahaha Renee: i'm glad you find it humourous:P -- marcie enjoying a cruel laugh at Renee's expense Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 1998 %% saundo: back to vaginal pharting Lisa: that sounds fun -- saundo and lisa enjoying themselves Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 1998 %% Lisa: i had no power last night Lisa: it sucked Lisa: no tv no nothing Lisa: i couldnt handle being amish Lisa: my dad and i bonded last night cause we had nothing better to do Lisa: it sucked -- lisa lamenting her lot Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 1998 %% Cyrano watches a 50mhz Sparc 20 struggling to zip a 750mb file saundo: yeow saundo: what's yopur next punishment for it going to be? -- Cyrano engaging in cruel and unusual punishment Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 1998 %% slightly: who's smoking crack in here> K: TEMPTATION -- K falling off the wagon Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 1998 %% K: "fighting bill gates" shold be in my work title somewhere K: i don't know how many master boot records i've had to clean because of his dumb ass slightly: man, if bill gates could be caught, he would get the shit beat out of him slightly: lets all get a bill gates pin~ata K: lets all watch the .MPG of the belgian pie incident -- K and slightly, plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 1998 %% rayrayr: sorry, i prefer to further my mind by watching intellectual things... rayrayr: like inspector gadget -- rayray being wise Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 1998 %% *** Lisa has been disconnected *** Lisa has entered room 'Main' Lisa: ...must learn to love the computer... -- lisa succumbing to Big Brother Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 1998 %% saundo: they call it sexchange cuz goddamit, I want to gnaw my own genitalia off in frustration right now -- saundo, on Microsoft Exchange Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 July 1998 %% saundo: in out in out smtp pop3 in out in out AUGH -- saundo ranting about, erm, something Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 July 1998 %% *** saundo has been disconnected marcie: when he comes back, he's going to roundly curse win95... you watch Cyrano: heheh *** saundo has entered room 'Main' saundo: fucking win95 Cyrano: ROFL marcie: hahahahahahahahahhaa Cyrano high-fives marcie saundo: bitches saundo: :-) Cyrano: on the _nose_ -- saundo being MS support boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 1998 %% Quasar: i just want a stable system and i want someone else to confiugure it and make it work Cyrano: well Cyrano: what do you want to do with it? Quasar: masturbate to online porn Cyrano: remember, computers are here to make our lives easier -- Quasar being honest Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 1998 %% marcie: okay, the moment has passwd marcie: oh gods marcie: PASSED saundo: wtf? marcie: i have been geeking way too long marcie: marcie: okay, the moment has passwd saundo: wahahahahahahah -- marcie in need of recovery Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 1998 %% marcie: *tongue* *** fred has been disconnected -- marcie wielding the Tongue O' Death Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 1998 %% rayray: al you are the central focal point of all evil in the know universe -- rayray is enlightened Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 1998 %% marcie: i am working early today, as you can tell marcie: i go home at 6 marcie: came in at ten Lisa: leave at 5:59 Lisa: :) Lisa: i insist marcie: yes marcie: i ... i feel the rebellion welling up inside me marcie: I WILL LEAVE AT 5:59! Lisa: and if you got a user needing help hang up on the fucking idiot Lisa: YES Lisa: W3RD! marcie: screw my boss! screw the phones! Lisa: YES Lisa: now go home and screw your husband! marcie: i shall break free from the shackles of work opressions and leave at 5;59! marcie: HEHEHEHEHEH -- marcie being rebellious Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 1998 %% Slayer: i cant help it that ive got diamond tipped acidic all weather jizz -- Slayer oversharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 1998 %% Mistress: i had a buyer for it..but he dissapeared marcie: fucker Mistress: he also wanted to pay me in S/m toys not cash Mistress: I want cash Manuka: hahahahahahahaa Mistress: I got too many whips as it is marcie: wahahahahaha -- Mistress trying to sell her couch Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 1998 %% *** K has left the room: *poof* rayray: oh really? sounds like story behind that, saundo saundo: byeah saundo: she got drunk saundo: started table dancing marcie sputters marcie: damnit saundo saundo: you know rayray: NOOO!! marcie: don't do that shit while i'm drinking my tea saundo: standard kind of deal saundo: hee hee rayray: marcie?? marcie: yes saundo: YES marcie: exactly what i do every tim i go home to see mom & dad marcie: and we go ou t to dinner saundo does the marcie-sputter-tea dance of joy rayray: yeah, me too marcie: start on the vodka and it's all down hill from there saundo: yeah rayray: which means i'm drunk often saundo: but you can bump and grind that thang, baybee saundo: *ahem* marcie: j00 gn0w it rayray: i just started on a screwdriver saundo: mind you, it's the first time I've ever seen a pole dance with a table leg saundo: wahahahahahahahah saundo: *ahem* saundo: not that you're vertically challenged at all rayray: did she strip for you? marcie: wahahahahahaha marcie: phuk ewe, sundo babye saundo: far be it from me, giant that I am, to make fun of your non-heightened-ness marcie: *smewch* saundo: ray: yeah, she did saundo: right down to the shirt saundo: *SMOOOOCHA* saundo: j00 gn0w eye lub j00 marcie: liar saundo: now marcie: j00 do nawt lub me rayray: damn she must not have been drunk enough rayray: :) marcie: j00 only LUST after me saundo: balance this beer on your head, coffee table saundo: :-) saundo: true saundo: guilty as charged marcie: like THAT'S a big surprise saundo: what the hell saundo: I'd lust after an apple core saundo: if it gets drunk and table dances marcie: so true saundo: anyway rayray: typical male saundo: enough of my sordid attraction to consumed fruits saundo: HEY saundo: I resemble that remark saundo: no saundo: resent marcie: YES saundo: dammit marcie: YOU DO saundo: I get those two confused rayray: sorry, but ya know saundo: so often rayray: if it fits... saundo: nah saundo: actually it doesn't marcie: saundo is only a typical male in that he has a penis saundo: yes rayray: marcie? is he telling the truth saundo: the rest of me is unique rayray: good marcie: and a damn fine one it is, i might add marcie: *ahem* saundo: whaa? marcie: your tww rayray: i didn't need to know that marcie: how i long for it marcie: or something saundo: did I leave the quickcam on in the shower again? saundo: "mysteriously" perched at navel height? marcie: yes you did. *leer* rayray: unless it was a threesome, then you can tell all saundo: silly me saundo: *waves paw* marcie: wahahahahaha marcie: *ahem* saundo: my tww is NOT TMI saundo: it's TLI saundo: too little information rayray: ah saundo: and I mean _little_ saundo: anyway saundo: enough about my genitalia saundo: back to vaginal pharting rayray: damn i'm goood marcie: wahahahaha -- Saundo & marcie flirting, and marcie's sister learning family secrets Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 1998 %% saundo: en is hours of endless silence, punctuated by moments of flesh tearing, sexual tension and a large amount of fun -- saundo yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 1998 %% saundo: grr saundo: stupid tape drive Rog: do you guys remember the cassette tap drives on the commodore? saundo: remember them? saundo: what the hell do you think I'm complaining about now? -- saundo being BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 1998 %% Saundo: I have a 1024bit encrypted rectum Monty: I heard some guy cracked it in 2 weeks or something -- Monty being confused Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 1998 %% Mistress leers at Saundo Saundo: woo! Saundo is leered at Al: leer-to-leer network? -- Al being a g33k Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 1998 %% saundo: having italian for dinner tonight Mistress: what's her name? marcie: wahahahaha saundo: *KOFF* Al: werd. -- Mistress being evil Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 July 1998 %% *** Lisa has been disconnected *** Lisa has entered room 'Main' Lisa: how do makers of such awful machines sleep at night? -- Lisa fighting her M*cint*sh Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 July 1998 %% Bear: whats new here saundo: well, marcie shaved her head and converted to hare krishna saundo: I'm recovering post op from sexchange marcie: yeah Bear: brb *** Bear has left the room saundo: dsarn marcie: hhaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA -- Bear getting scared Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1998 %% miri: wait, ya think a dog biting your ass, you can get a hand down his throat ? Slayer: if you dont run away like a moron, yeah miri: dogs bite down and shake, if they get a hold of something, they arent going to let go, you're screwed Slayer: you gotta be quick miri: oh yeah and humans are that quick Slayer: look, if you shove your fist down its throat it cant rip your arm off, getting it in there is another matter Slayer: its not like you have much else to do while it's eating your liver miri: if your fist is down its throat whats to stop its jaws from clamping down? Slayer: b/c your fist is in its throat miri: ar,m go... byebye miri: its first reaction is going to be to shut its mouth Slayer: if you have your arm jammed down to the elbow in his throat it _cant_bite_ miri: thereby chomping off your arm Lisa: you people are so cute marcie giggles Lisa: i was waiting for marcie to say it but i thought i would Mistress: bulimic dog Slayer: look, you scoop the poop, let me deal with the one fact i know about dog attacks -- the usual intellectual discussion Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1998 %% saundo: an yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of fucked up pieces of machinery saundo: I shall not fear the evil that they bring and the insanity that they cause saundo: for I am the meanest BOFH with a leatherman that they ever thought they could mess with... and remain in one piece -- saundo praying Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1998 %% Slayer: every poodle ive ever met i wanted to rape with a table -- Slayer getting vicious Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1998 %% Saundo: well, short, fat moron Saundo: that about sums up this little turd Saundo: I've flushed more charismatic things than this turkey -- saundo describing a customer Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 July 1998 %% Al looks deeply into lisa's eyes, hypnotizing her Lisa: i....am....hypnotized Lisa: ... Al: you are a kitten. ask for a drink. -- al and lisa Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 July 1998 %% Al: being over-tired is a weirder high than any drug -- the wisdom of Al Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 July 1998 %% Lisa: im going Saundo: night you spice girl you *** Lisa has left the room: Poof! Saundo: :-) *** CyberChi has entered room 'Main' marcie: ahaahhahahaha Al: don't try it with a mac CyberChi: that was luncalled for marcie: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAA CyberChi: uncalled Saundo: wahahahahahhahaha Al: hahahahahahah Saundo: quote it, marcie marcie high5s saundo CyberChi: no Saundo 5's marcie marcie: i'm there Saundo: 1 r00l Saundo: :-) CyberChi: real knee slapper Al: werd. -- Lisa feeling insulted (with good reason) Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 July 1998 %% Courtney: win98 has a silly bug saundo: win98 IS a silly bug marcie: heh marcie: i was waiting for you to say it, bofh -- saundo's wisdom again Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 July 1998 %% Courtney: he just sits there and tries to give birth to his words -- Courtney describing her neighbor's speech impediment Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 July 1998 %% *** Paris has entered room 'Main' Paris: word up *** Paris has been disconnected marcie: werd to your modem wob: woop -- g33ks observing irony Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 1998 %% saundo: lord knows I like to have my ass shaved by a complete stranger -- saundo oversharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 July 1998 %% Manuka: sweetie? Slayer: dear? Manuka: not you, bitch marcie: wahahahahahahahahaha -- Manuka and Slayer being cute Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 July 1998 %% wob: my nipples are hard Slayer: thats because i'm thinking about licking them marcie: werd. -- wob and slayer oversharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 1998 %% Mistress: i've been wandering around prostitutes webpages saundo: well, that's what I do when I'm bored :-) -- saundo reveals his secret Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 1998 %% Slayer: do i want to take a shit before i get in bed to read? Al: do you want to have to get out of bed to shit? Slayer: ill just shit in the morning if i dont tonight Al: damn Al: slay you're lazier than I am Al: and I mean that as a copliment -- Al in admiration Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 July 1998 %% wob: FUCKING LAME MUD wob: SUCKY MUD wob: FUCK MUD SUCKY MUD FUCKING SUCKY MUD wob: heh wob: i just want to rant about it wob: this wont last long Slayer: so overall you're impressed, right? -- Slayer getting feedback on his MUD Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 July 1998 %% Slayer: and illgirl once again turns up evidence against her usefullness on this planet -- Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 August 1998 %% Slayer: lets see how long i can stay connected this time marcie puts a hex on slay's internet connection Slayer: dude, dont do that, my connection/computer gets any more fucked up and i might as well break out my telegraph machine -- Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 August 1998 %% K: i have a stack of records longer than both of our dicks put together marcie: that wouldn't take much -- K getting dissed Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 August 1998 %% Mistress: saundo..we always seem to wind up talking about your neither regions -- Mistress observing Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 August 1998 %% Foo: aloha Slayer: hablo no elspico -- Slayer being cruel to the newbie Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 August 1998 %% dweez: i've been getting laid too much -- Dweezil tells a lie Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 August 1998 %% Al: dammit Al: I have jelly in my crotch marcie: *KOFF* marcie: allrighty -- Al overshares again Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 1998 %% saundo: "Wee take the finest fresh luser, and beat the LIVING FUCK OUT OF THEM FOR ASKING STUPID STUPID QUESTIONS IN THEIR STUPID WHINEY VOICES..." saundo: "and then gently sautee them with garlic and onions, a little chicken stock.." marcie: wahahahhahahahahahahhahahha marcie: i luv j00, bofh marcie: truly saundo: "and then MASH THEIR LITTLE HEADS IN AND SCOOP OUT THE 1/2 TEASPOON OF BRAIN THAT"S IN THERE AND MAKE SPITBALLS OUT OF IT...." saundo: "and serve it to you, fresh from the oven, on a bed of nails." marcie: mmm marcie: yummy saundo: "We would recommend a nice bottle of medical alcohol to kill the taste" -- saundo going slightly mad Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 1998 %% wob: ln -s /bsd .plan wob: no one will finger me ever again saundo: wahahahahahah marcie: wahahahahaAHAHAHA marcie: sick bastard wob: heh heh heh -- wob being completely evil Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 1998 %% Al: what drugs were responsible for EBCDIC ? -- Al asking the $6mil question Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 1998 %% marcie throws herself at moni's feet Mistress: heh Mistress: marcie is so cute. :> saundo: prime, tender australian imported BOFH saundo: wahahahaha marcie giggles saundo: she's so cute, and just the right size too marcie looks horrified and claps a hand over her mouth marcie: i didn't giggle saundo: ooooh no marcie: you just think i did Mistress: heh marcie: yup, that's it Mistress: yes..you did marcie: no marcie: NO marcie: NO GIGGLING Mistress tickles marcie saundo: YES marcie: marcie does nawt giggle marcie: YEEK -- marcie ruining her reputation Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 August 1998 %% wob: i am way fucked up wob: i cant move from my chair wob: and my ass hurts wob: fucking wasted as hell Al: you're supposed to put the bong in your MOUTH -- wob being enlightened Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 August 1998 %% wob: i can fart smog. -- wob oversharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 August 1998 %% wob: FUCKERS wob: FUCKERS wob: FUCKERS wob: FUCKERS wob: FUCKERS wob: FUCKERS marcie: um marcie: yeah wob: fuckers. Manuka: FUCKERS marcie: yeah marcie: fuckers AlPhood: FUQQRS! *** AlPhood is now known as Al marcie: hi al marcie: we have a typically intelligent conversation going on... join us Al: FUCK Al: FUCK Al: FUCK Al: okayt -- nothing more need be said Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 August 1998 %% brawk: *briiiiiing* saundo: "Resumix, Chris speaking, FUCK OFF" marcie: wahahahahahaha marcie: yes marcie: THAT is the way to do tech support brawk: Mr. Jockstrap? My server is down--help! saundo: "FUCK OFF" saundo: :-) brawk: How do I do that? saundo: ok brawk: I don't see a "FUCK OFF" key saundo: you take your head saundo: the one on your shoulders saundo: and you insert it rectally saundo: yes... yes.. that's it.. up yur ass brawk: That's what the other tech guy said, but it didn't help brawk: heh brawk: OK, I went & fucked myself, but the server is still down! brawk: You better come in *right* *away* saundo: "well, ti wasn't meant to fix the server, I just wanted to feel better" -- Saundo ranting about his job Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 August 1998 %% Cyrano: had a pair of incenstuous lesbian cockatiels for a while Cyrano: they made quite a sight -- Cyrano telling about his pets Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 1998 %% Cyrano: hey Cyrano: HEY Cyrano: that's what we need Cyrano: a mouse with vibrating feedback saundo: yup Cyrano: variable speed marcie: THAT's IT saundo: we came up with the rectal controller marcie: lends a whole new aspect to net sex, eh Slayer: joymouse vibrates when you feed her? saundo: kinda like a spaceball, but optimised for rectal control Cyrano: pahahah Cyrano: force feedback saundo: DO NOT GET RECTO_CONTROL MIXED UP WITH ORAL_CONTROLLER -- Cyrano getting an idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 1998 %% Mistress: heh...when I first got it, I got a pint jar of black and a pint jar of purple Mistress: I took off my top and literally dunked my breasts into the jar marcie feels her head explode saundo: [pause] saundo: what an image to have on a warm tuesday afternoon -- Mistress on liquid latex Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 1998 %% saundo: look saundo: these bizarre secshukl practices have to stop, marcie saundo: -k saundo: I don't mind the duct tape, custard and bull ants dressed as Xena saundo: but windows? saundo: SPARE ME saundo: whip me, beat me, make me admin NT saundo: but don't make me INSTALL windows! marcie: wahahahahahahahhaha -- saundo pleading Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 September 1998 %% saundo: i have a digital penis Monty: I knew that -- saundo (no comment necessary) Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 1998 %% saundo: fn0rd marcie: hclef saundo: marcie saundo: get this song out of my head saundo: it's driving me mad marcie: okay marcie: what its it marcie: s/its/is saundo: saundo: "Don't let's start" by TMBG is in my head marcie: ah marcie: i see marcie: well marcie: it could be worse marcie: you could have "it's a small world" in your head marcie ducks and RUNS saundo: "that you're my precious little girl.. so don't don't lets start" saundo: WENCH saundo flying tackles marcie saundo: I'm obviously in a highly suggestible state saundo: cuz now I have that saccharine stupid fucking song in my head marcie: HArHar/harArahrharharharhaRHARar marcie: god i'm cruel -- marcie torturing saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 1998 %% Sarge was drinking hoch before it even got to the states! Sarge: +o saundo: your penis must be so big over that Sarge: only when I think of you saundo saundo: yes well saundo: we all have our problems -- saundo being unimpressed Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 1998 %% Mistress: nothing like the occasional explosion to keep people's interest -- Mistress Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 1998 %% saundo: ssh -l saundo brain.saundo.org.au saundo: Password: dweezsucksmyass saundo: % su saundo: Password: sweatynads saundo: # killall -HUP brainserver saundo: # rm /dev/brain saundo: # ln -s /dev/brain/twisted /dev/brain saundo: # killall -HUP brainserver saundo: # /etc/rc.d/twistedthinking start saundo: # logout saundo: Connection closed. saundo: % logout saundo: Fuck off. -- Saundo geeking too much Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 1998 %% wob: gogo gadget kernel compile! saundo: I'd ask if you're tripping again saundo: but I know you're not :-) -- w0b and saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 1998 %% Mistress: bah...my body hurts marcie: i am very careful -- marcie and moni Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 1998 %% carrye: where the fuck is court saundo: she's off invading uzbekhistan saundo: she had to get out of the house -- saundo playing Mr. News Guy Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 1998 %% marcie: i was irc talking to various and sundry RL friends marcie: ian seduced me away from my kb marcie: only they didn't know it til i got back and they asked where i'd been marcie: O:) saundo: man saundo: they get convcerned after 2 minutes? marcie: wahahahaha marcie: bitch saundo: :-) -- marcie explaining her IRC secshual exploits Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 September 1998 %% Cyrano: yesterday I finally found that gallon of 95% sulfuric acid I lost last year Cyrano: amazing what moving turns up dweez: HAHAHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHHAAH dweez: i HATE it when i lose sulfuric acid -- Cyrano striking fear in our hearts Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 1998 %% saundo: despite our BOFHish exteriors saundo: we are actually nice people saundo: just don't tell anyone, or I'll make castanets out of your testicles -- saundo being BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 1998 %% Cyrano: I'm sure in another 20-30 years we'll have some pretty amazing VR saundo: yah Cyrano: might end up replacing the current arcades as such... an attraction to people who want to be immersed in a different reality Cyrano: one plus side: we'd get rid of all of the people who MUD 23 hours a day 'cause they'd go in there and starve -- Cyrano hitting the nail on the head Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 1998 %% marcie: YES marcie: MORE marcie: i'm just stoked about my perl class marcie: no really marcie: it has nothing to do with where moni's hands are right now saundo: wahahahaha -- marcie lying through her teeth Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 September 1998 %% marcie: you know marcie: i would buy a mop marcie: since i don't have one and all saundo: but? marcie: but then i'd have to use it marcie: and that would suck saundo: ah saundo: an obvious downside marcie: yes -- marcie being non-domestic Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 September 1998 %% Al: so...anyone have plans for the equinox? Slayer: i'm gonna sacrifice a cat if she doesnt quit pissing on the bathroom rug -- Slayer getting vicious Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 September 1998 %% wob: i like the feeling of dead meat in my ass -- wob proclaiming his luv for dweez Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 September 1998 %% Mistress ponders Mistress: 1.) hear loud bang coming from other room Mistress: 2.) notice gf is missing Mistress: 3.) go into bedroom and ask gf what the bang was Mistress: 4.) gf replies "i was banging on the ceiling" Mistress: 5.) nodd and go back into the computer room marcie grinz Mistress: just a random moment in my life saundo: wahahahhaah marcie: remember, missy, just nod and smile... nod and smile Mistress: somethings just aren't explainable Mistress nodds and smiles saundo: don't make eye contact, just back away slowly -- Mistress wondering Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 September 1998 %% Slayer: i'm more bulgy now than i used to be though Slayer: so when i claim to be the center of the universe, its not just an ego thing, it involves gravitation too -- Slayer describing his geek gut Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 1998 %% Courtney: cellulite is no womans friend Courtney: i swear to kill any woman who has none marcie: ahahahha marcie: GOOD marcie: i'll help you Courtney: cool Courtney tosses marcie an uzi Courtney shoots dassin Courtney: har har Courtney shoots jenni mcarthy marcie: YES Courtney shoots calista flockhart Courtney: that woman hsas some fine legs marcie: and that bitch kate moss marcie: court: yes indeed Courtney: YES! marcie: THAT BITCH IS GOING DOWN Courtney: kate moss MUST DIE! Courtney: ratttatatattatat rattatatatata wob: THE BITCH MUST DIE wob: wr0d -- Courtney and marcie going on a rampage Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 1998 %% saundo: wob saundo: you bastard saundo: I had to put some customer on hold cuz I was laffing saundo: so hard at: saundo: wob: i have that saundo: wob: FUCKER saundo: wob: CUNT saundo: wob: BASTARD saundo: wob: ASSHOLE saundo: my peon is looking at me lik eI've lost it completely wob: hahahhahahahahh wob: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA wob: rofl wob: i rool -- wob showing off his Tourette's syndrome Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 1998 %% Cyrano: I was cleaning my desk and I found 768mb of ss20 ram Cyrano: I was wondering where that went -- Cyrano losing his memory (har har) Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 September 1998 %% Lisa: oh there is this new rule at school that says if you cuss you get 3 detentions to serve Lisa: it's been a tough year so far -- Lisa, dammit Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 September 1998 %% dassin: SKDHFFGJFGKJSDHFGJFGKSD dassin: FUCK marcie: um marcie: yeah dassin: FUCKF dassin: FUCKFUCKFUCK marcie: lose your backup? dassin: GODDAMN FUCKING STUPID ASS DIPSHIT FUCKING DEVELOPERS dassin: FUCK THEM ALL dassin: no dassin: THEY SHOULD ALL BE FUCKING SHOT marcie agrees dassin: THE ENTIRE FUCKING BREED marcie: why this time? dassin seethes dassin: they want us to open a huge fucking WIDE hole in our firewalls so THEY can make their perty little program work dassin: and they're whining and bitching at management that WE arent playing nicely dassin: and WE wont help them dassin: and WE wont support their project that is OH so important marcie gives dassin and beer and shares her pain marcie: s/and/a/ dassin dosent drink beer, but is happy to take other alkiehawl marcie: heh dassin: ok marcie: you're gonna need it dassin: Im I'm going shooting dassin is gonna try a .45 tonight -- dassin (a sysadmin) venting Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 1998 %% *** marcie has entered room 'Main' elric: but the whipped cream wouldnt stick elric: itd slide out wob: uhm yea elric: I say use bubble gum elric: itll adhere to the ass hair marcie: i don't think i wanna know -- marcie getting too much information Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 October 1998 %% wob: shorty: Hey any one know what is going on over at augsburg wob: brawk: what's down with sunspot? wob: what a bunch of fucking pathetic bitches *** Sarge has entered room 'Main' Sarge: question....can any of you log into auggie? -- pathetic bitches on EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 1998 %% Slayer: hold on while i whip this thing out meg: that's my secret sex video -- Slay and meg Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 1998 %% Slayer: we are but 8 score young blondes and brunettes Slayer: it is alonely life marcie: dressing marcie: undressing marcie: bathing Slayer: bathing, dressing, undressing, knitting exciting udnerwear marcie: making exciting underwear saundo: making eciting lingerie marcie: :) Slayer: er making marcie: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA marcie: i see we ALL know that line -- saundo, slayer and marcie bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 1998 %% Slayer: blakc and white, respectively saundo: play president and intern with me :-) Slayer: oh oh can i be the dress? saundo: wahahahahah marcie: wahahahahAHAHAHHAHAH -- slayer being a sick fucker Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 1998 %% marcie: there is a neurotic witch sweeping my cube marcie: i'm not sure whether to be amused or frightened -- marcie observing Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 October 1998 %% Sarge: I have never asked you gusy what you think of apple marcie: is this a troll? Al: hahahah -- Sarge sticking his foot in it Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 November 1998 %% marcie waves her hands in front of miri's face miri: thats not good miri: made me have to pee -- miri in her natural drunken state Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 1998 %% wob: ASS wob: ASS wob: ASS wob: ASS wob: ASS wob: ASS saundo: are you tripping again? saundo: or are you writing out your christmas list? -- wob and saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 November 1998 %% Slayer: marcie, i have something to tell you Slayer: you aren't going to like it marcie: oh dear Slayer: i... Slayer: i can't even say it Slayer: you have to look for yourself marcie: uhmmm Slayer: luvewe.eglobe.com/~slayer/char/ marcie: yer gay and are dashing all my hopes to get you in bed at xmas? Slayer: no, this is worsh Slayer: er, worse marcie: oh dear marcie: OH GOD marcie: FRAME#S marcie: YOU BASTARD Slayer hangs his head -- marcie being disappointed in her prodigy Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 November 1998 %% saundo: indubitably saundo: i can't believe I was able to spell that marcie applauds politely saundo bows saundo: thank you saundo: thank you saundo: and for my next death defying attempt saundo: I shall drink this glass of water marcie: from the opposite side of the glass? saundo: DO NOT ATTTTEMPT THS at HOMMMMMMMME saundo: hell no marcie sniggers saundo: what do you think I am? some kind of stunt person thingy marcie: heehee saundo drinks his glass of water saundo: oh damn saundo: I cut my arm off marcie cheers! marcie: wahahahaha marcie: man marcie: saundo marcie: you need sleep saundo: yes saundo: yes I do -- saundo defying death Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 1998 %% wob: but w0zz's fucking dvd player wont give up the disc thats currently in it saundo: yes well saundo: you need to clean the jizz off them every so often saundo: esp. before yout put them IN the player wob: i did tho! Lisa: speaking of which. i'm hungry. wob: i made sure to wipe! wob: i blame w0zz wob: hes the last one who put a dvd in there saundo: bwhahahahaha wob: HE forgot to wipe wob: not me saundo: ok then saundo: it's all w0zz's fault wob: YES wob: him and his fucking ewok jizz wob: it is not of this eartth. saundo: bwhahahha saundo: smal and furry? saundo: makes a weird sort of chirping sound? saundo: wants to hump your leg? wob: lol wob: it runs around hitting yer shins w/ a stick saundo: i've got it - wants to rise up in rebellion against the empire? wob: saying "JUB JUB! JUB JUB!" saundo: wahahahahah saundo: yeah saundo: that's ewok jizz for ya saundo: but in terms of lubricating a dvd, no good saundo: heh saundo: "But there was no warning label on the dvd saying NOT to put ewok jizz in it!" saundo: "I'll sue!" DontKnow: so you get to sue the dvd player manufactuer. wob: hah wob: ok wob: must find sinus medicine wob: berfore my head explodes. saundo: ewok jizz wob: naw way duod wob: thats more like saundo: it slices! it dices! it fixes drains! wob: for hair gel wob: or something saundo: it unblocks sinuses! wob: or glue. DontKnow gets out a papersack for putting wob's head into if it does explode. saundo: it balances your checkbook, it invades small russian republics saundo: it's the WONDER LUBE of the 21st century! DontKnow: so how much an once for this stuff? saundo: you can't buy it saundo: you have to milk it from the source yourself saundo: THAT"s the tricky part DontKnow: hmm..milking w0zz might be difficult. *** afk is now known as Lisa saundo: oh I dunno wob: milk the ewok. saundo: he might quite enjoy it wob: i dont want to know about this. saundo: bwhahahahahahahah wob: duod Lisa: you mean you already don't know about it? wob: i can just picture it now wob: like cows saundo: No saundo: NO PICTURES wob: attached to suction things. DontKnow: true, milking wob might be funner. wob: milking ewoks saundo: no mental images wob: for their multifunction jizz. saundo: there are just some things I don't NEED to think avout wob: duod DontKnow: but mental images are fun. wob: it'd be an ewok dairy wob: you'd put out ewoks to graze saundo: bwahahahah saundo: little ewoks out on the range, bein g herded up to ccome in for a milking wob: ahahhahhahah wob: YEAH wob: i can see it now wob: bunch of w0zz lookalikes runnign around wob: w/ guys on horses saundo: branding the little fuckers wob: herding them wob: hahhahahaha saundo: whips saundo: and cattleprods saundo: bwahahahah wob: and ewokboys who have a rear end fetish saundo: why am I hearing South Park cow sounds now? wob: ahahahaha saundo: moo! Moo! wob: mooo...moo moo MOOOO! wob: mooo?! saundo: "You ewok's don't have any business on this here people train" wob: HAHAHAHAH wob: cuz you're ewoks wob: noooo NO NO wob: dont try any of that ewok hypnosis on ME! saundo: bwhahahahahah saundo: lol saundo: "Ohmigod - the ewoks jizzed on kenny!" saundo: "You bastards!" saundo: ewok rustling saundo: ewok-tipping wob: HAHAHAHHAAH wob: EWOK TIPPING wob: HAHAHAHAHA wob: oh man wob: ewok casteration wob: hahahahaa. saundo: bunch of geeks out tipping ewoks wob: "Castrate the ewoks!" saundo: wahahahaha saundo: bwhahahah saundo: ewok breeding wob: haha. saundo: "Fields full of free range ewoks, roaming gracefully, and fucking anything that moves" saundo: "Energetic little buggers, ain't they?" wob: rofl saundo: "fertilise YOUR garden with guaranteed authetic ewok pewp!" saundo: "Fresh from our ewoks, to you" wob: wonder if they lay eggs. saundo: "Hatch your own!" wob: farm fresh ewok eggs! saundo: Ewok omelettes wob: you never notice saundo: "can't make an omelette wwithout fucking over a few ewoks" wob: that we just take this shit wob: too far wob: to the nedxt level Lisa: you guys are so crazy. saundo: bwahahahhaha wob: -d saundo: heheh saundo: no, really? wob: hehe Lisa: yah Lisa: really wob: heh wob: ok wob: feeling really pewpie now saundo: well, don't let me get started on Jacques Cousteau and "Ewoks of the Sea" wob: must go to bed wob: or something wob: haha wob: dork wob: nitenite -- saundo and wob Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 1998 %% saundo burps saundo: damn fine pizza Renee: hi sundo marcie grins marcie burps saundo saundo: thanks mom saundo: didn't even spit up on you Renee: aw a thoughtful baby marcie: :) marcie: yes, yes marcie: so that's the reason you were so interested in my breasts Renee: hahahaha marcie: and here i thought you found me fetching marcie: ah well -- marcie discovering the truth Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 1998 %% marcie yawns Slayer: dont do that, i get horny -- Slay getting desperate Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 1998 %% Slayer: to any polish pepoepl listening to this, fuck you Slayer: damn idiots, hitler's got machine guns and tanks and what do the poles use? Slayer: fucking hroses Slayer: er, horses -- Slay getting random Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 1998 %% miri: oh and do you know what the damn redneck relatives of slayer made me eat today miri: some fucking ham miri: some fucking ham in the deviled eggs miri: thats some sick shit miri: who the fuck puts ham in eggs marcie: ahahahhaahhahaha marcie: southerners :) Slayer: actually, it's even wrosse than that Slayer: worse i mean Slayer: it was deviled ham Slayer: read: the shit they wont even put in vienna sausages marcie: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA marcie: oh man marcie: tell them to give her some turnip greens or something marcie: but not that miri: I shoulda threw it up miri: fucking sick twisted people out there -- miri gets educated on redneck cuisine Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 1998 %% saundo: there needs to be a bedroom scene here marcie: but of course4 saundo: cuz "The earth moved for me" NEEDS to be done marcie: complete with panting, groaning and thrusting marcie: hehehehehheheheh saundo: erm, down marcie marcie: oh wait saundo: don't make me throw this bucket of cold water on you marcie: that was LAST night marcie: never mind saundo: and then use the electrodes saundo: and the wet noodles marcie: oooh marcie: you tease -- Saundo watching "Dante's Peak" Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 November 1998 %% saundo: ok saundo: time for me to go sleep marcie: fucker saundo: eh saundo: well saundo: 2what are you going to do? marcie: um marcie: masturbate marcie: oh wait marcie: i mean WORK marcie: yeah marcie: that's what i meant saundo: marcie saundo: we can hear you when you SPEAK what you should be THINKING marcie: yes dear? :) marcie: wahahahahahhahahahahahahahhaha -- marcie getting confused Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 1998 %% saundo: fn0rd marcafk: fn0rd, dammit saundo: ah saundo: its our little ray of sunshine :-) -- Saundo and marcie being cheerful Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 1998 %% saundo: wahahahahah saundo: ya know saundo: every conversation I have with you cyrano, leaves my mind just a little more warped -- Saundo admiring Jamez Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 1998 %% saundo: dammit saundo: entertain me Al: Renee: i hate the taste of sperm sitting on dicks saundo: ok saundo: that's sick, but interesting -- Saundo regretting he ever asked Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 1998 %% saundo: lewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwd marcie: very lewwwwwwwd saundo: such a cool word of the english language saundo: but you have to get he pronunciation right saundo: lewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwd marcie: yes marcie: it almost SOUNDS like you're leering marcie: in fact it DOES saundo: yes saundo: you can almost hear the drool hitting the floor saundo: followed by the sound of the pants hitting the ankles marcie: wahahahhahahahah marcie: oh yes saundo: and the conga line starting marcie: conga line? marcie: i don't know what kind of sex YOU have... saundo: conga line of 2 saundo: or more, as the case may be marcie: heh heh heh -- Saundo giving grammar lessons Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 December 1998 %% Al: there's something to be said for RAID level 5 saundo: yes saundo: and the thing to say is "schwing" -- Saundo getting a tent in his shorts Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 January 1999 %% Sarge: ok who has some horror stories about being an admin and having pagers/cell phones go off at early morning hours? Slayer: i hate it when bill gates calls me for advice at 3am -- Slayer being egotistical again Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 January 1999 %% cuinhell: everyone in here is easy cuinhell: ;) Lisa: i'm not easy marcie: heheh marcie: oh well Lisa: i'm mjust a slut cuinhell: good enough -- Lisa being herself Eagle's Nest BBS, 07 January 1999 %% saundo: why do you not have caffeinated beverages? saundo: and why are you not listening to ambient t00nes marcie: well saundo: and digging the gentle intersection of the lines that the music make, man marcie: i have no caffeineted beverages for two reasons marcie: 1) the bloody Coke machine is out of Coke, and I would rather drink sulfuric acid than Pepsi marcie: 2) some motherless bastard STOLE THE REST OF MY COFFEE marcie: !@#!@#! saundo: WHAT saundo: WHAT?! saundo: kill saundo: death saundo: frighten severely marcie: yes marcie: YES marcie: YES DAMMIT marcie: kill marcie: MAIM marcie: HURT someone for taking my COFFEE marcie: !@#!@#@!!@ saundo: well saundo: may I just say I'm disappointed with you, marcie saundo: no emergency supply? saundo: no "In case of theft, break glass" cabinet? marcie: it was depleted saundo: no "Touch this and die, coffee-scum-thief" marcie: we were on the last of the emergency supply marcie: and now it is GONE marcie sobs saundo: WHAT saundo: on the last of the emergency supply? marcie: YES saundo: and you allowed yourself to USE the emergency supply?! marcie grovels and repents at the BOFH's feetz saundo harumphs marcie: it won't happen again marcie twitches saundo: DAMN RIGHT marcie: must... have... CAFFEINE... saundo: or there'll be the spanking and the moaining and the pleasding and the... saundo: no saundo: wait marcie: oooh marcie: wait saundo: that's the OTHER thing marcie: hehehehheh marcie: tell me MORE about my punishment then marcie: O:) saundo: no marcie: damn you saundo: this is a first offence saundo: this gets you a ticking off marcie: hmph marcie: no moaning and spanking and stuff? marcie: damn marcie: DAMN saundo: not for the first offence marcie: hmph saundo: after that it's three strikes and it's out marcie: i'll have to do better saundo: so as to speak saundo: (we use more than 3 strikes) marcie: hehehhe marcie: i should HOPE SO saundo: well saundo: we take th finest saundo: no WAIT saundo: that's something else saundo: i'm all weirded out saundo: it happens when I have to go to the puzzle palace, aka the phallic symbol, aka head office building saundo: 38 stories of phallic symbol marcie: i can only imagine what goes on in your head, saundo saundo: actually saundo: you can't :-) marcie: hehehehh marcie: but dammit, i have fun trying saundo: and truth be told saundo: you probably don't want to marcie: indeed marcie: it would be scary saundo: it's a good thing telepathy isn't that far advanced saundo: or they'd be locking me up saundo: and the beatings, and the electric shock therapy, and the hosings and the "Bubba's" marcie: oooh yes marcie: but the question is marcie: can i watch? marcie: :) saundo: what saundo: the beating up of me? or the broadcasting of my thought patterns? marcie: any of it saundo: bwhahahha marcie: it all has so much... poential marcie: potential, too saundo: you have a weird #define of potential marcie: well, yes marcie: but that's why you like me, remember? marcie: pay ATTENTION saundo: hehe saundo: no saundo: it's your weird #define of reality saundo leers marcie: muahahahahahah marcie: oh go on marcie: tease me some more :) saundo: heh heh heh saundo: :) -- marcie and saundo have a typical conversation Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 1999 %% marcie: :P *** Mistress has been disconnected marcie: whoa marcie: i have the tongue of death Jase: hahahahah -- marcie getting egotistical Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 1999 %% drdave: if i recall marcie you were endowed Sarge: from what I hear marcie has a rack bigger than a sherman tank Sarge: did I just say that? marcie: ahahahahaAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA marcie: man marcie: you guys are SERIOUSLY desperate -- marcie laffing Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 1999 %% %% Al: I am: Al: Officially Pissed Off. marcie: allrightythen marcie: and why is this? Al: I seem to have misplaced my earwax shovel Al: I have not seen it in weeks Al: and Al: and Al: I promised wob I'd make him a candle marcie: heheheheh marcie: gotta hate that Al: yes, dammit Al: I DO hate that Al: especially since Al: it'd be REALLY difficult to try to purchase a new one! marcie: damn it all -- marcie sympathizing with Al Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 1999 %% Mistress: okie..speaking of amusement Mistress: I'm going to *ahem* go and take a bath Mistress: alone Mistress: with my faucet -- Mistress REALLY MISSING her girlfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 January 1999 %% saundo: oh no saundo: no no no no no no nonono marcie: jes? saundo hyperventilates saundo: this is not happening marcie: oh dear saundo: this is NOT happening marcie: lusers are invading your house? saundo: 3 words for you marcie: or your sphincter? saundo: words that will strike terror into your heart saundo: starsky and hutch marcie: OH GOD marcie: NOT STARSKY AND HUTCH saundo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH marcie: ANYTHING BUT THAT marcie runs screaming from the room saundo: now do you see why I am in denial saundo: anger is coming saundo: fear is after that marcie: saundo marcie: it could be worse marcie: it could be MUCH MUCH worse marcie: 3 words marcie: that will strike even more fear and terror into your heart saundo: i am pregnant marcie: saundo: your anus imploded marcie: LAVERNE AND SHIRLEY saundo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH saundo faints marcie: see what i mean? -- saundo and marcie scaring each other Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 January 1999 %% marcie: you've heard that sop about diamonds being a girl's best friend? marcie: FEH marcie: that is false marcie: VIBRATING PAGERS marcie: now THOSE are a girl's best friend saundo: ahahahahah saundo: bullet shaped vibrating pagers marcie: oooh yes saundo: "oooOOOOOOOOH... it's my pa_GER *squeak*" marcie: *KOFF* marcie: C|N>K marcie: thank you VERY much saundo: *pant pant pant* "Ex-cuse.... *breathe/moan* me" saundo: ahahahahahahaha saundo: RULE saundo does the C|N>K DOJ marcie: ahahahahhhaah -- Saundo scoring one Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 January 1999 %% marcie: "everything is cool" marcie: *SCREAM* marcie: "how are things with you?" marcie: *SCREAM* saundo: ah marcie: "everything is cool... I WISH YOU WERE DEAD" saundo: so you're talking to your mother, right? marcie: hahahhahahahahahahahahahahhaa -- Saundo and marcie (just kidding, Mom...) Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 January 1999 %% marcie: what up Al: nammuch. marcie: kewl. Al: no. Al: nawt kewl. Al: <- stuck Al: in Al: a rut Al: :( marcie: bummer marcie: whyfor? Al: too lazy to effect change in my own existence. marcie: ah marcie: understand Al: I've thrust myself into a catch-22 of my own creation marcie: is this an existential problem here of cosmic significance, or merely being too lazy to get up for a beer? -- Al getting angsty Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 1999 %% *** saundo has entered room 'Main' saundo: fn0rd saundo: newbridge can KISS MY ASS marcie: fn0rd marcie: hi saundo saundo: I'm gonna bend RIGHT OVER saundo: and they can KISS IT saundo: and I'm gonna fart saundo: OH how I'm gonna fart saundo: right in their coders eyes saundo: and they'll scream saundo: OH how they'll scream saundo: and claw at their eyes marcie: i love it when you get on a rant, saundo marcie: :) saundo: and pray for death saundo: and then saundo: and THEN saundo: I'm gonna laugh saundo: OH how I'll laff saundo: To paraphriase slay saundo: I've never met a newbridge product I didn't want to rape with a table marcie: so marcie: in other words marcie: you're having a REALLY good day :) -- saundo on a rant Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 1999 %% marcie: "wihtout dick you'd be nothing but a dyke!!" Slayer: i said that? marcie: yeah you did Slayer: i am cool -- Slayer after being highly drunk Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 1999 %% ray: i don't sleep well travelling ray: and when i don't sleep i have these homicidal urges when ppl annoy me marcie: bahahahahahah marcie: that's my girl :) -- Rachel on why she doesn't take the bus Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 1999 %% ray: whadda say that we burn our bras, cut our hair, and alienate our parents by living out west w/a militant lesbian feminist militia? ray: sound like a plan? marcie: sweet! marcie: works for me marcie: just gotta drive up the road to boulder : marcie: :) ray: thats proabably true. how scary. -- Rachel getting Ideas(tm) Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 1999 %% Slayer: i want to harness the power of an H-bomb into a blowjob -- Slayer contributing to the quote file again Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 February 1999 %% DM: srfgyi347ygtrf7gy4tger DM: END USERS MUST DIE DM: I feel better now -- DM being a sysadmin Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 February 1999 %% *** Sarge has entered room 'Main' cuinhell: BOOBS! Sarge: why thank you -- Sarge being flattered Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 1999 %% *** Manuka has left the room Slayer: dammit, manuka forgot to pay me saundo: *snicker* marcie: you weren't that good -- Slayer being quoted again Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 February 1999 %% marcie: my cat pissed on the couch ONE time marcie: he lost his balls the next week saundo: ahahahahahahah marcie: :) saundo: remind me not to piss you off marcie -- saundo being scared Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 February 1999 %% Cyrano: we have a 450 out there with 4x4gb that we need more space on Slayer: check your autoexec.bat file -- Cyrano seeking advice on Sun servers Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 February 1999 %% Slayer: has anyone seen the video for 'fly away' by lenny kravitz? marcie: sort of Slayer: every girl in that video needs to have a load of my spunk shoved into her, orafice doesnt matter saundo: thank you ever so for sharing Slayer: you're more than welcome -- Slayer being a pig Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 February 1999 %% marcie: i'm saying 'fuck' a lot tonight marcie: i should stop that saundo: fuck that marcie: hahahahahhahahahahahahaahah -- saundo giving sage advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 1999 %% cuinhell: a infinite number of monkies with an infinite number of typewriters would refuse to type most of zorro's posts marcie: ahahahahAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA marcie: damn, dude marcie: once in a while you say something REALLY profound cuinhell: :) -- Cuinhell making a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 1999 %% cuinhell: the real problem with murder is the blood cuinhell: getting rid of a body is relatively easy marcie nods sagely cuinhell: but all that damn sticky blood is a real pain in the ass to deal with marcie: i hate when i get blood on my carpet cuinhell: yes, even stainmaster is a bitch to clean blood out of marcie: indeed it is marcie: especially after ti dries cuinhell: than you may as well scrap the carpet cuinhell: then marcie: yes marcie: expensive as hell marcie: dammit, i hate that cuinhell: it's best to kill in the tub, ala Psycho, but often hard to catch the victim there cuinhell: you could drown them in the tub, but all that soap makkes em hard to hold onto cuinhell: -k marcie: slippery little bastards -- the geeks have an academic discussion Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 1999 %% marcie: i'm so fucking thoughful marcie: i actually walked over to this luser's cube to make sure his system was booting like it should marcie: i gotta cut that shit out... it's bad for my reputation cuinhell: what the fuck!!!!!!!!!!!! who are you and where is marcie?!?!?! marcie: hehehehhehehehehehheheheheheh -- cuinhell being scared Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 March 1999 %% Lisa: my name is lisa and i have been sober for 4 minutes -- Lisa being Lisa Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 March 1999 %% *Slayer* they made me talk about us breaking up, now i am semi-sad, make me feel better Slayer> *thrustThrustTHRUSTGINCHSPLOOGE* *Slayer* valiant effort, but no good -- Slay being sensitive Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 March 1999 %% Slayer: but thats ok, there are some jealous women out there who dont think liv tyler is even slightly attractive Sarge: she is a hottie Slayer: if liv tyler stepped on dog shit i would suck the shit from between her toes, clean them with baby wipes, and then wrap a diaper around her feet Slayer: and slit the throat of the offending canine Sarge: I don't think I'd go that far...but she's a hottie -- Slay being a fanatic Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 March 1999 %% Sarge ponders taking over k's web server *** K has been disconnected Sarge: damn I'm good marcie: ahahahahahahahahhaha -- Sarge flexing his power Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 March 1999 %% Cyrano: (still hacking this sunswift card) wob: sick Cyrano: hey Cyrano: you don't want to know what I had to do to fit an lpvi card (sbus rev A) into a SS20 (sbus rev B) Cyrano: was majorly painful marcie: ahahahahahahahaha -- Cyrano being hardware hacker boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 March 1999 %% cuinhell: i need some breakfast and nicotine before I kill someone. -- cuinhell being a morning person Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 March 1999 %% Mistress saw a vibrator that plugs into the cig lighter in the car saundo: this is one of the projects I'm working on atm -- something you need to tell us, saundo? Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 April 1999 %% saundo: nickelodeon, french for "warp your children's mind" -- saundo on quality children's programming Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 1999 %% Slayer: ok, after i cram this last roll down, i've crammed that roll down saundo: Slayer: ok, after i cram this last roll down, i've crammed that roll down saundo: that's... deep, man. Slayer: never let it be said that i cant grasp the obvious -- slayer gets profound yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 1999 %% wob: i deem this day as "Shitmonkey" day wob: you must now use "Shitmonkey" in all yer conversations today. -- w0b getting his kicks Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 1999 %% Mistress: Nato bombed a Yugo Factory...totalled it Mistress: $17.00 wroth of damage -- Mistress speaks the truth Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 1999 %% taco: I bought my first ever Playgirl last night taco: but I fear it'll make me laugh at any man who comes near me now -- taco getting spoiled Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 1999 %% Slayer: oh cool, my mouth is numb Slayer: go go gadget bacardi -- Slayer being entertained Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 April 1999 %% saundo: <- got to rid in the moni-mobile saundo: [random weekend update] marcie: woowoo marcie: did you get to ride the moni marcie: ? marcie: *d&r* Al: *koff* saundo: now, see, marcie saundo: you just can't even pronounce "subtle", can you? Al: hahahahahah marcie: moi? marcie: *blinkblink* -- marcie being nosy Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 April 1999 %% cuinhell: some dork writes into maximum pc magazine asking for more hot chicks in the magazine....christ, buy a playboy, good hardware is jerkoff material in its own right -- cuinhell being a complete geek Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 1999 %% cuinhell: My penis and me. (PENIS5-DOM) PENIS.ORG cuinhell: my throat is sore. cuinhell: that's probably a bad thing to say after pasting penis.org -- cuinhell having a revelation Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 1999 %% Slayer: i can maneuver my ass with delicate precision when required -- Slayer giving out vital information Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 1999 %% Slayer: its like icant ger5t drunka round h3ere /wo being amde fun of -- Slayer's condition speaking for itself Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 1999 %% K: i love my color laser K: i would make love to it. -- Kevin gushing about his printer Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 April 1999 %% Marianne: do you think if i hang out in here long enough, i might actually learn something about computers? cuinhell: yes marcie: if you ask the right questions marcie: :) cuinhell: you can learn what a pain in the ass they are when others are allowed to use them Marianne: i already figured that part out -- Marianne being enlightened Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 1999 %% saundo: pardon me while I have some existential angst marcie: carry on marcie: i'm currently battling the existential hopelessness of 3 AM marcie: i think i need coffee saundo: you just need to stop working shift saundo: get a real job :-) marcie: hey marcie: working shift keeps me sane marcie: i don't have to deal with idiots saundo: uh-huh saundo: I've seen what you call "sanity' marcie saundo: and while I like it marcie snickers saundo: it is not of this universe marcie: well marcie: yeah marcie: and this is a problem because? marcie: :) saundo: no problem :-) -- saundo and marcie bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 April 1999 %% elric: still got that damn garbage song stuck in my head saundo: which one would that be? elric: special saundo: ah saundo: well, marcie has the cure for that saundo: marcie elric: Do you even have an opinion, a mind of your own? saundo: if you please marcie: "iiiiiiit's a small world after alllll" elric: I thought you were special, I thought you should know saundo: a quick rendition of "It's a small world after all" if you pelase saundo: OH MY GOD marcie: "iiiiiiit's a small world after alllll" saundo: You sick SICK SICK person saundo: :-) marcie: are you impressed? saundo: I sit her pantless as a mark of respect marcie: muahahahhaha -- marcie antici........pating Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 April 1999 %% cuinhell: brooke shields 12 years old and naked Slayer: woah cuinhell: werd Slayer cums on himself Slayer: dammit, now i gotta take another shower -- Slayer going statuatory Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 1999 %% Cyrano: finally smogged & regged my other car Cyrano: the Diplomat rides again wob: ut oh wob: heh Cyrano: I swear that car cannot be killed by conventional weapons Cyrano: believe me, i've tried -- Cyrano on his car Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 May 1999 %% Lisa: slugs have 4 noses -- Lisa being Lisa Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 1999 %% *** marcie has entered room 'Main' Cyrano: yummy marcie: why thank you -- marcie being egotistical Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 1999 %% Slayer: hey marcie Slayer: er Slayer: hey mistress Slayer: sorry, all you lesbians look alike to me -- Slay getting confused Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 1999 %% Mistress: ohhhhhhhh...give me a home, where the lesbians room and marcie can play all day.... where latex is free and you can lube me and we'll frolic in bed all day.... Mistress: wine is my friend marcie: hahahhahahahahahahha marcie: obviously :) -- Mistress getting happy Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 1999 %% u235: Actually, I'm sure there are some nice women out there....I mean what are the odds of find the other daughter of satan... -- harrison on his ex-wife Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 May 1999 %% cuinhell: qwertyuiop cuinhell: 1234567890 marcie applauds cuinhell farts Cyrano: zxcvbnm marcie: y'all are so cute when you're trying to impress me elric: slartibartifast Cyrano juggles half a dozen 9-track tape reels while reciting the periodic table to the tune of the Tom Leher "Elements" song cuinhell: harharhar marcie: ahahahaa -- the geek boys at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 May 1999 %% vanyel: why does everyone molest marcie vanyel: is she like, hot or something? cuinhell: because she LOPVES it cuinhell: and she is molestable cuinhell: -P marcie: yes marcie: YES cuinhell: and she beats us if we don't marcie: oh yes van marcie: i am so fucking hot marcie: everyone here downloads pics of me and masturbates to them marcie: constantly cuinhell: yes vanyel: really? cuinhell: i have ruined 4 keyboards vanyel: where can i get some? vanyel: i havcnt masturbated in the last few hours Slayer: how did you... cuinhell: i was going at it so hard one night that I just started slamming my dick against the keyboard Lia: too much info marcie: www.snerk.net Slayer: amateurs marcie: there *** Manuka has entered room 'Main' cuinhell: well, I came better than I ever had, but broke a couple of keys off Cyrano: marcieagain marcie: now you too can d/l my pics and wank to them, young jedi Cyrano: marcie: everyone here downloads pics of me and masturbates to them Manuka molests marcie Cyrano: YES marcie: bahahahahhah Cyrano: is the one with you, the midget, and the two gallons of salad oil online yet? marcie: the webcam is down marcie: jamez: of course! Cyrano: wooWOO marcie: wesson me, baybeeeeeee -- marcie getting her freak on Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 May 1999 %% Slayer: oh yeah did you get that n ipple pic i sent you? cuinhell: werd! cuinhell: pass the kleenex Slayer: so you got the pic -- Slayer and cuinhell Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 1999 %% vanyel: cute querk cuts a butt -gurgling, bowel-wrenching, lap-vibrating, SKANK-assed fart on van's lap to null the cuteness querk: there vanyel: og god vanyel: i must have you now -- vanyel and querk being cute Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 1999 %% *** marcie has entered room 'Main' Al: EEWWW GROSS ICKKY NASTY marcie: fuck you too al marcie: ;) -- Al loving up on marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 June 1999 %% cuinhell: bow to my TWW cuinhell: for it is friendly, and likes to make new friends marcie: oh dear marcie: cuin, you've been drinking again, haven't you? -- cuinhell bragging about his, umm, friend Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 June 1999 %% cuinhell: mis has a big cock? damn, she's got it all wob: SEE WHAT YOU MISS WHEN YOU GO TAKE A SHIT -- cuinhell catching up Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 1999 %% cuinhell: uruhjfdujdtjfj7rt685t7ifgyit79878r87ur68irt68ift68f97f miri: ok I think I dont lag now Slayer: do you kiss your mom with that mouth? miri: but thats unimportant wob: he not only kixses her, but with tongue cuinhell: HAHAHAHHAA wob: nothing like french kissin yer mother, eh cu? *** miri has been disconnected Cyrano: here's to you, Mrs. Robinson wob: HAHA cuinhell: grandma is better wob: why, cuz she takes out her dentures? wob: oh wait, thats yer grandpa that does that for you, sorry. wob: ;) Lia: gross wob: you mean you dont participate in that? Slayer: nothing like a guy kissing his drooling toothless 90 year old grandfather with tongue -- ewwwwwwww! Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 1999 %% marcie: cuinhell: BONER marcie: *** Monty has entered room 'Main' marcie: how ironic -- marcie observing Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 June 1999 %% cuinhell: SWINGING DICK *** Lisa has been disconnected -- cuinhell interfering with Lisa's life Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 June 1999 %% vanyel: i'm taking an exchange 5.5 class this week vanyel: its amazing... vanyel: microsoft managed to take something that a small unix server could handle, and made it necesary to have many MANY servers to do the same thing. vanyel: the instructor hates me Sarge: hahahaha -- vanyel being loyal to the Cause(tm) Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 1999 %% saundo: that whole nightgown and video store erection complex thingy saundo: saundo: this is a man who has to crouch when he walks through a mall saundo: saundo: "Me, no, just a... uh... muscle problem" -- Saundo, regarding Vanyel getting a woody over Lia in a nightgown Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 June 1999 %% cuinhell: i used our ds3 to download 661 new southpark sounds :) cuinhell: i am a dedicated and loyal employee -- cuinhell working very hard Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 1999 %% Manuka: and throughout, street entertainers, bums, and attractive nubile young women marcie: yes Mistress: *perk* marcie: ESPECIALLY attractive nubile young women Mistress: nubile young women in short shorts eating ice cream marcie: like the belly dancer the other night marcie: oh my my Manuka: usually, of the small-breasted variety, wearing spaghetti tank tops, no bra, and at the whims of the cool mountain breezes Mistress whimpers Mistress vibrator cringes and tries to hide under the bed. Manuka: oh, and that belly dancer. OH MY FUCKING GOD cuinhell: stop it! I am stuck at WORK! Mistress: which isn't as nice as being sucked at work marcie: so true cuinhell: exactly mis -- Manuka on the street mall in Boulder, CO Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% Manuka: and then at the checkout, I impale my nuts on some lady's cart Mistress: umm..that's forplay? Mistress: and I thought I was kinky -- Manuka on his adventures in Wal-Mart Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% cuinhell: people have the STUPID gateway ads (with who are you song) as mpgs....*delete out of sheer spite* marcie: cuin marcie: man marcie: you are rapidly becoming my hero cuinhell: i can feel the power removing all compassion Manuka: hehehe marcie: pahahahahhahaha marcie: that's the way it SHOULD BE -- cuinhell being BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% cuinhell: awwww, how cute. wav file of someone's kid saying "i love you daddy" *delete* -- cuinhell being a true sysadmin Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% Cyrano: tip of the day: a ss10 hard drive mounting kit can be built out of chewing gum, duct tape, and 5/8" rubber grommets -- Cyrano being a hardware geek Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% Vanyel: i wil now type with my erect penis Vanyel: helllo worl,kd -- Vanyel showing off Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% Cyrano: (btw, a ss10 with a 7200rpm disk feels like a washing machine on spin cycle) < later that same evening... > Cyrano: ok Cyrano: 7200rpm drives are fun while they last, but they do _not_ last :-( -- Cyrano having fun with Sun hardware Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% Slayer: stop it dyke! Slayer: i mean Slayer: stop id goddess! marcie: and don't you forget it cuinhell: BWAHA Slayer: i already told you i loved you Slayer: what more do you want marcie: only your immortal soul Slayer: i dont HAVCE one marcie: oh yeah marcie: shit -- Slayer bowing and scraping Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 1999 %% cuinhell: i came blood once marcie: that can't be healthy cuinhell: that was the last time I used a cheese grater as a sexual device marcie: HAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA -- cuinhell revealing Too Much Information Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 July 1999 %% cuinhell: linda rondstat and aaron nevile....there is no greater hell -- cuinhell displaying his musical preference Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 1999 %% cuinhell: BOW TO MY RTWW cuinhell: -R wob: RTWW wob: RADIOACTIVE TWW wob: WERD wob: IT GLOWS IN THE DARK wob: ! cuinhell: HAHAHAHHA -- wob makes a discovery Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 1999 %% cuinhell: yes. panic and run around. it makes it more interesting when you all vaporize marcie: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- cuinhell watching "The Day After" Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 1999 %% K: i bet i don't get disconnected 4 times a night K: using aohell marcie: that's sick, man K: its the most reliable isp in jax K: and the fastest Vanyel: move. -- Kevin getting desperate Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 July 1999 %% K: speaking of saundo K: you used to tell me i annoyed you and you didn't like me K: and we never really started talking until i married courtney K: and usually i'm the net prick saundo: K, I think you're a pretentious fuck saundo: but I can respect that :-) -- saundo bonding with k Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 July 1999 %% saundo: soggie is a multiple personality disorder sufferer on PCP, crystal meth AND coke saundo: doesn't know who it is, can't stop being everyone and has to do everything at 400mph marcie: bahahahaahaahahahahahahahhahaha -- saundo on Auggie BBS Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 July 1999 %% marcie: cute chick alert saundo: where? marcie: she gives me the eyeball when she comes in every morning saundo: bahahahahah marcie: i wonder if she's a dyke marcie: either that or she's trying to figure out if i am :) saundo: it's either that, or the fact that you're naked at your desk again marcie marcie: OH YEAH marcie: shit saundo: I mean, I can understand forgetting pants marcie: forgot about that saundo: but everything else? saundo: that's just WEIRD -- saundo and marcie together again Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 July 1999 %% Cyrano: if I hear the term "open source" just one more time... Vanyel: SHUT YOUR OPEN SOURCE< UNCLEFUCKER! wob: hahahahaha Cyrano: I swear I will shove Eric Raymond up Richard Stallman's ass wob: hahahaha wob: now that wob: would be a true wob: sick fucking combo wob: good god wob: you'd never shut it up wob: ever wob: EVER -- Cyrano and w0b venting Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 1999 %% Cyrano: he sings a bit like william shatner but without the musical ability -- Cyrano on Richard Stallman singing the Open Source Software song Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 1999 %% *** marcie has entered room 'Main' marcie: fleh *** Lisa has entered room 'Main' Al: fleh? *** Manuka has entered room 'Main' marcie: fleh. Al: fleh? Lisa: I've been here for years and I still don't know what the hell you people ever say -- Lisa being confused Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 1999 %% K: rememeber the little handheld ass baster K: that your parents used to use on yer ass K: when you were constipated and 2 years old wob: what? wob: WHAT? cuinhell: WTF? wob: NO K: its a ass baster elric: AHRAHRAHARH K: you fill it with water wob: I HAD NORMAL PARENTS K: and squiert it up yer ass cuinhell: HAHAAHAHAHA elric: the portable enima baster wob: I DIDNT HAVE PARENTS THAT SHOVED SHIT UP MY ASS -- K and company being themselves Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 July 1999 %% K: hey K: after you get married K: is it wrong to pick the lane at the grocery store with the hottest chick in it? marcie: nah marcie: i did that today marcie: :) K: ahahahaha -- marcie on her pick-up techniques Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 July 1999 %% Cyrano overclocks his keyboard... Sarge: you are just wrong -- Cyrano being wrong Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 1999 %% K: This device complies with Part 15 of the FCC Rules. Vanyel: so does my dick Vanyel: tho sometimes i wave it at the tv, and the reception goes nuts -- Vanyel bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 1999 %% *** Vanyel is now known as FARTyel *** FARTyel is now known as SHITyel SHITyel: brb Slayer: ahahaha Slayer: guess that one got away from him -- Van losing control of his bodily functions Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 1999 %% Slayer: oral sex to anyone who can find me a decent rip of aint talkin boy love Slayer: boy = bout marcie: heh marcie: what a freudian slip, slay Slayer: i'll say -- Slay making an oopsy Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 1999 %% cuinhell: i now have a consultants badge. I feel even more arrogant already cuinhell: BOW BEFORE MY BILLABLENESS! -- cuinhell getting full of himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 1999 %% marcie: oh ghod marcie: this white boy i work with is rapping marcie: time for teh headphones cuinhell: HAHAHAHAHRHARHARHAR Vanyel: ow. wob: werd, y0! cuinhell: fucking whigger Vanyel: or 3 gigs of MP3's marcie tuns up "momentary lapse of reason" -- marcie worshipping Pink Fl0yd Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 1999 %% Slayer: marcie... help ... Slayer: please Slayer: anybody marcie: whut Slayer: i'm starting to like things about win95 marcie: eesh marcie: you must be cured marcie smacks slayer on the forehead and screams "BE HEALED!" Slayer throws up split pea soup Vanyel: win 95 is ok for some things marcie snickers cuinhell: smack him wiht the deadly axe of truth Vanyel: like games and stuff marcie: you are now healed marcie: now marcie: give me $1000000 -- slayer pleading for help Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 1999 %% Cyrano: someone find me a good cheap UPS :) wob: haha wob: good luck ;) Cyrano: (before I wire a 1KVA automobile inverter into a bank of deep cycle batteries) -- Cyrano preparing to hack Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 1999 %% wob: man wob: so close to being able to never leaving the house marcie: ahahahahahaha wob: now if i just found a grocery store that delivered wob: i'd never leave marcie: netgrocer.com :) wob: netflix.com just fucking rules wob: ut oh wob: heh Cyrano: ahahahah wob: the dream may come true -- w0b trying to achieve oneness with his computer Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 1999 %% *** u235 has been disconnected *** u235 has entered room 'Main' Marianne: heh u235: JESUS THIS IS UNREAL wob: vahhaaah u235: I'm going to kill them...and their families u235: I bet this is how the serbian/kosovo thing started wob: lol Marianne: ahahaha wob: over an ISP dispute u235: I bet kosovo ISP kept dropping Melosovich's internet connection -- u235 getting mad Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 1999 %% Slayer: you call me a slovenly redneck just because i put chip crumbs in the bowl of dip and scoop it out with my hands? -- Slayer displaying his heritage Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 1999 %% vanyel: bah bah vanyel: black sheep vanyel: have you any wool vanyel: yes sir yes sir but i CANT FUCKING NETBOOT THIS THING vanyel: and he goes and blows the little boy away wiht a tek-9 -- Vanyel twitching Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 1999 %% marcie: what do you want for your birthday? Lisa: money marcie: heheh Lisa: clothes Lisa: or a cd player installed into my car marcie: something not expensive :) Lisa: money isn't expensive unless you get a lot of it -- another classic quote from Lisa Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 1999 %% Slayer: i called zip a godless heathen Slayer: she meowed at me Slayer: i fed her -- Slay being conquered Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 July 1999 %% Vanyel: try reading coredumps on shrooms Vanyel: they make sense. -- Vanyel giving tips Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 1999 %% cuinhell: i always quote my ass now cuinhell: i have a feeling it is trying to communicate something that I am missing cuinhell: someone else may figure it out Lia: it's saying "stop eating burritos" -- Lia giving valuable advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 July 1999 %% vanyel: YES vanyel: I AM SUCH AN ELEET NT HAX0R vanyel: like thats an accomplishment -- Vanyel showing off, sort of Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1999 %% Al: is it possible to make homemade doritos with cheap-ass store-brand corn chips and a fully loaded spice rack ? cuinhell: hahaha cuinhell: um, maybe marcie: worth trying cuinhell: or. cuinhell: you could just buy doritoes cuinhell: -e Al: dammit Al: that's wouldn't be the same Al: I'm trying to HACK snackfood here Al: don't kill my dreams man! cuinhell: ahahaha -- Al dreaming big Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1999 %% Marianne: damn funeral home wanting to sell me p lots Marianne: hell, i ain't dead yet slay: maybe it's a hint -- Mariane being loved Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1999 %% slay whips it out slay: this is like a cock, only smaller -- Slayer having personal problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1999 %% cuinhell: hmmm, something is wrong with the SMS servers again. jobs are actually completing in a timely manner -- cuinhell looking askance Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 1999 %% Slayer: correction: it's a commercial for "AD&D is satanic" marcie: yes marcie: ad&d is satanic marcie: which means slayer is a servant of satan wob: fucking devil boy marcie waits for slayer's head to start spinning around spewing pea soup wob: I COMDEMN YOU TO HELL, BITCH wob: haha Vanyel: well i am satan Vanyel: so slay, go get me a soda -- Vanyel and his human servant Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 July 1999 %% Slayer: i think it's time you all knew something about me Slayer: time to come out of the closet marcie: you're a lesbian? Slayer: i'm straight... Slayer: a heterosexual Slayer: please dont judge me marcie: OH GOD marcie: i can't believe it marcie: i thought i raised you better than this Slayer: well, you wont give me a t shirt Slayer: i dont have much choice! Slayer: you just dont understand me! marcie: i gave you all the proper role modesls Slayer runs to his room and slams the door marcie: i even had ru paul come over and talk to you when you turned 13 marcie: you're a disappointment! Slayer: THAT'S WHY I'M STRAIGHT! marcie: no son of mine is going to be one of ... of THEM! marcie goes into a rage and cuts slay out of the will -- Slay coming out of the closet Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 1999 %% Monty: Did somebody say botulism? cuinhell: ok, time for burger king -- cuinhell being ironic Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 1999 %% K: i remember when i was a senior in high school K: i shit every day K: at 12:35 meg: hahaha K: for a long while K: that's regular. K: i wouldn't know regular now K: if it snuck up and bit me in the ass -- K complaining about getting old Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 1999 %% Vanyel: fucking exchange server Vanyel: keeping me from getting laid tonite Monty: bah K: dude K: your face K: is keeping you from gettin laid tonight -- Kevin dissing Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 1999 %% dweez farts Slayer shits dweez: cool dweez: we are of one brain dweez: and one ass -- dweez and Slayer bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 1999 %% roo: you dont see inner city kids getting diagnosed with ADD Monty: it's real, it's awful cuz it causes you to act completly out of impulse K: INNER CITY KIDS ARE TOO BUSY BEING DIAGNOSED WITH MURDER ONE -- K making a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 1999 %% vanyel: sendmail hurts my brain -- Vanyel admitting his one flaw Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 1999 %% Mistress: now...chocolate ice cream with swirls of carmel, topped with hot fudge, whipped ream, nuts and a cherry....tha'ts multiple orgaasms with a sexy woman making wild love on a lazy Saturday morn Mistress: morning Mistress: and I think I need to get laid -- Moni after a discussion on ice cream and sex Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 July 1999 %% *** AQUAMAN has entered room 'Main' AQUAMAN: Ass! AQUAMAN: I have been moved. marcie: you have been moved? AQUAMAN: Yes. I have been moved by the _eloquently_ depicted idea of ass presented by cuinhell. marcie: i see. marcie: he has this effect on people. AQUAMAN: moved i.e. emotionall stirred. I feel compelled to repeat "ass" a few times. AQUAMAN: But never in a row. And yes, I agree. marcie nods solemnly marcie: i think you'll find, however, that you will be much more emotionally moved marcie: if you say it this way: marcie: ASS! marcie: instead of: marcie: Ass! marcie: it has more dramatic impact... more *punch*, if you will. wob: blah. AQUAMAN: Oh, how true. But not to discount that if you sa Ass! that it has no merit. marcie: you make a good point -- the geeks having an intellectual discussion Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 July 1999 %% wob: burp Vanyel: bad wob. Vanyel: you ate auggie, didnt you? -- Vanyel accusing wob Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 1999 %% vanyel: hrm, i feel funny vanyel: should i call a doctor? Twister: no that's normal Twister: death is immenent vanyel: cool -- Vanyel accepting his lot Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 1999 %% wob: Network Access with GAWK wob: that is sick. *** meg has left the room wob: this is wob: frightening wob: why would anyone do this to themselves. wob: this is not natural. ed: I dunno ed: a fucking gawk webserver *harharharh* ed: I just found it funny.. wob: i know wob: it is funny wob: just sick and twistedly funny wob: i mean wob: who the fuck wob: thought up doing all that shit with awk ed: I been shoing it to everybody I can find today so we can laugh at it. ed: somebody who didn't know perl *smirk* marcie: this... is just WRONG. -- wob and ed on a scary web page Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 1999 %% cuinhell: arciebeeyptch marcie: no marcie: dammit, cuin marcie: how many times do i have to tell you marcie: it's ARCIEBEEYPTCH! cuinhell: no. marcie: :) cuinhell: it's fucking 400 billion degrees here this week. cuinhell: there is no enthusiam. marcie: ahahahhhhaah cuinhell: it's sucking my will to live. cuinhell: in fact, i am planning a trip to the sun to cool off next week -- cuinhell telling us how hot it REALLY is Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 July 1999 %% marcie: mdzxlkjadljakjasdf Vanyel: no Vanyel: you mean sahnjksdbnmvcnrjlas;fjdf Vanyel: right? marcie: ohyeah marcie: sahnjksdbnmvcnrjlas;fjdf marcie: my bad -- Vanyel correcting marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 1999 %% Cider: a spider isn't big unless you can positively identify it while travveling at 65 mph down the highway. -- DontKnow giving advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 01 August 1999 %% Vanyel: if i was a black guy, id grow a great big afro, you know, 3 feet high Vanyel: and cut a hole in the middle to keep stuff in Vanyel: like my keys, nachoes -- Vanyel impressing the girlies Eagle's Nest BBS, 02 August 1999 %% *** Darkethe has entered room 'Main' Slayer: 8 characters, there, chief Darkethe: screw your archaic system marcie: love it or leave it, weenie boy ... Darkethe: Graey, when will these people start being funny, like the logs ;) marcie: oh, i see marcie: another quote file groupie marcie: i lose more newbies that way Darkethe: rofl, no, just a friend of Graey/Slayer/Willie marcie: www.snerk.net/quotes/enquotes.txt marcie: amuse yourself there until you can be witty -- marcie engaging in a battle of wits with an unarmed person Eagle's Nest BBS, 02 August 1999 %% Darkethe: a guy told me about this bar he went to, where SCA members got in fights with goths all the time cuinhell: dorks fighting dorks? what was it, a slapping ocxntest? cuinhell: contest too Darkethe: cuinhell: no, they got pretty rough. those SCA dudes can whip the hell outta ya with bigass pieces of rattan -- Dark warning everyone off SCA geeks Eagle's Nest BBS, 02 August 1999 %% cuinhell: fyesiuygiwhgiushuoighiusiushgiushihgsd marcie: that's what YOU think cuinhell: shaddap. cuinhell: :) Lia: heh marcie: :) wob: asldfkjaslkdfsdafasdfadfa;sldkfhjalsdkfhasdkljfhasdkjlfhasdfkjahfalk jsdfhasdlkjfhaskjdfhaslkjdfhzskjdhasdlkjfhasdkjfhaskjdfhaslkjdfhsadl kjfhasdlkjfhasdkjlfhasdlkjf cuinhell: yes. marcie: allrightythen Lia: and another thing Lia: quwrhpqjnfjksanviuwoiuqywrepyqioyteproiuypiuoqrtpoqiyporuhjkvmcxnbui eqhfvihvjhvclhvfhioshavfiu cuinhell: no. Lia: you want to debate that point? cuinhell: no need. -- another intelligent night on EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 02 August 1999 %% Cerberus: I launched a fuckign search engine last week :D wob: werd Cerberus: it is completely and totally 100% a porn archive wob: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA wob: HAHAHAhHAaHAHjkashfdlkajsdhfas;lkdjf17~hasdf Cerberus: i swear to god, look up "dogs" and you get the top 60 hits are "fucking dogs from behind: why they are better or worse than sheep" wob: YOU ROOL CERB wob: HAHAHAHAH Cerberus: wanna know why? Cerberus: because one of the things it indexes is members.aol.com, where there are like 5 million AOL memebers with their homepages Cerberus: it's 98% porn. Cerberus: it's like the largest porn archive on the net, as far a swe know wob: ahhahahhhahhaaahahaha wob: HAhAHAAHHAhahAHAHAHAH Cerberus: it's at 10TB now or something. wob: AOL PRON! Cerberus: I want to register www.10tbporn.com and aim it there Cerberus: but i'd get fired :( marcie: HAHHAHAHAHAHHAA wob: AMETEUR AOL PRON wob: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA Cerberus: heh. it's hilarious Cerberus: they are now making members a gigantic SAN and uber-redundant wob: that fucking rules Cerberus: cuz - you gotta have highly available porn Cyrano: zerb Cyrano: rofl Cerberus: JAMEZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ wob: that fucking rules -- Cerb the AOL BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 02 August 1999 %% Marianne: you people make cats sounds like fun, buti think they're still evil -- Mari being a dog person Eagle's Nest BBS, 03 August 1999 %% vanyel: something in this officeis making e sick vanyel: as soon as i leave, i feel fine marcie: van... they're called CUSTOMERS -- Vanyel missing the obvious Eagle's Nest BBS, 03 August 1999 %% vanyel: my head feels like its running windows NT vanyel: its slow, bloated, and feels like it just crashed into q brick wall -- Vanyel with a cold Eagle's Nest BBS, 03 August 1999 %% cuinhell: werd K: werd marcie: werd cuinhell: werd marcie: wr0d cuinhell: wird marcie: w3rd cuinhell: were'd marcie: damn we must be bored cuinhell: yes. -- the g33ks being bored Eagle's Nest BBS, 03 August 1999 %% Slayer: clit cuinhell: tit marcie: bit marcie: figures y'all would name female body parts and the first thing i think of has to do with computers marcie: am i a geek or what -- marcie being a geek Eagle's Nest BBS, 03 August 1999 %% wob: i like lwm wob: it is tiny and fast. wob: like dweez -- w0b on a window manager Eagle's Nest BBS, 03 August 1999 %% cuinhell: I am building a new baseload of 95 for all the lusers out there. cuinhell: I install the 95 y2K patch and it needs to reboot, so I switch back to this machine. when I switch back it's locked at "please wait for your system to shutdown" cuinhell: excellent patch. cuinhell: solves all y2k problems by making the machine unusable -- cuin taking good care of his lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 05 August 1999 %% DM: elvis isnt dead... he just logged onto EN and sat in Chat -- DarkMuse solving the mystery Eagle's Nest BBS, 05 August 1999 %% Sarge: I am old, you are ancient, and well dweez...he should already be dead ;) Wicked: you should hope you're in such good shape when you're as "old" as dweez marcie: yes marcie: dweez is a studly hunk of manlove marcie: and besides that marcie: he's cute :) Wicked: I wouldn't go that far marcie: ahahahahaha Wicked: cute yes. studly hunk of manlove? debatable Slayer: hey, you used that same line on me, you whore marcie: yes well marcie: i'm just easy Slayer: coughwhorecough Wicked: at least you're honest marcie: damn straight -- marcie being sociable Eagle's Nest BBS, 05 August 1999 %% Cyrano: geek is building a NeXT laptop Cyrano: sick sick sick -- Cyrano being sick and wrong Eagle's Nest BBS, 05 August 1999 %% vanyel: i need to go to the doctors marcie: well marcie: then you should go vanyel: im listning to carley simon MP3's vanyel: and LIKING THEM vanyel: yorue so vain vanyel: i bet you think hthis song is about you marcie: oh dear marcie: you DO need to go to the doctor vanyel: dont you? vanyel: dont you? cuinhell: van, immediately start listening to white zombie...and don't stop until you want to rub carly simon's face off with a cheese grater vanyel: will NIN do? cuinhell: NOW, BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE -- Vanyel needing serious help Eagle's Nest BBS, 06 August 1999 %% Vanyel: its 80's MP3 day at the AlliedSignal 2101 computer room today Vanyel: i got a little change in my pocket going jingalingaling marcie: dammit leo marcie: i'm going to hurt you severely marcie: now i've got that fucking stupid song in my head Vanyel: want the mp3? marcie: NO marcie: BITCH Vanyel cackles evilly -- Vanyel torturing marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 06 August 1999 %% marcie: every guy i've ever met would do lots for a blowjob marcie: LOTS cuinhell: yes. cuinhell: I would even be pleasant to be around for a blow. :) cuinhell: but it better be a DAMN good blow marcie: ahahahhahahaahhahahaha -- cuinhell on sexual favors Eagle's Nest BBS, 06 August 1999 %% *** Al has entered room 'Main' marcie: al Al hates windows. Al: thank you. *** Al has left the room -- Al telling us how he REALLY feels Eagle's Nest BBS, 06 August 1999 %% Slayer: don't mind me, i'm just licking the TV screen where reese witherspoon's belly is -- Slayer lusting over another woman Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 August 1999 %% marcie: HArHaRHaRHAHrAHrAHrAHRHARarARHA marcie: gawd marcie: why the fuck is EN down marcie: this is marcie: like marcie: not cool marcie: and i'm starting to sound like wob marcie: HELP ME cuinhell: HAHAHAHRHARHARHAR -- marcie needing help room 'nest' on Auggie BBS, 17 August 1999 %% Clapton: how do i tell who is in here? marcie: telepathy Vanyel: /e show users *** Clapton has left the room: show users Vanyel: I am going to go to hell. marcie: BAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- Vanyel demonstrating the 'exit' command Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 1999 %% Slayer: i wonder what it's like to be stupid -- Slayer being modest Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 1999 %% Vanyel: one of my sites in minnesota got rained on Vanyel: hole in the roof cuinhell: HAHAHAHREHARAHRAHR Vanyel: right over the nt server cuinhell: fucking minnesotans Vanyel: all the other servers were fine Vanyel: so the nt server soaked up all the water. Vanyel: it made an excelent spoonge marcie: bahahahaahAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA -- Vanyel pointing out the uses of Windows NT Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 1999 %% ed: anybody wanna go pick off USWest linemen with me? wob: werd wob: im there duod. Cyrano: hell yah DontKnow: count me in. -- US West is REALLY loved by EN geeks Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 1999 %% tish humps marcie's leg marcie hops onto tishy's lap and wiggles marcie: hehehehhehehe Slayer: that's my leg, use the other one -- Slay being clever Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 1999 %% Vanyel: USWest. cuinhell: damn van, there are some things you just don't say in public -- cuinhell chastising Vanyel for obscenity Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 1999 %% Cyrano: I should know better than to browse the web at 2am Cyrano: there are some things out there I did _not_ need to know about Cyrano: although elric: hit the alt.bin.pic.ero.plumperspage? :P Cyrano: bah Cyrano: no, much worse than that elric: nothing is worse than that Cyrano: anime amputee fetishists Manuka: eep! elric: hahaha Cyrano: no shit -- Cyrano getting grossed out, for once Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 August 1999 %% wob: there's nothing like a datacenter power outage to wear you out. -- wob at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 1999 %% wob: HOLY TESTICLE TUESDAY -- wob exclaiming, erm, something Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 1999 %% Mistress nibbles on marcie marcie nuzzles moni Mistress: how's the cutues bofh I know? Mistress: cutest even marcie wiggles marcie: getting ready to jet outta work wob: OK GET THE HOT LESBO SEX ACTION GOING NOW wob: IM ALL READY wob: oh wob: sorry Mistress just got home Mistress: heh wob wob: those thoughts were supposed to stay in my head wob: and not come outa my fingers. marcie: bahahahahhahahahaha -- wob taking a break from work Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 1999 %% wob: i have a raging bull in my panties. -- we don't wanna know, wob Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 1999 %% cuinhell: calling them motherfucking cocksuckers is an affront to motherfucking cocksuckers everywhere, but it must be done -- cuinhell on US West Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 August 1999 %% topdawg: i'm tyhinking about putting the linux system out in the middle of the highway Manuka: hope it gets hit by a PCI bus? marcie thwacks manuka for bad puns wob: wewp wob: total recall rools. Manuka doh's as he gets BUSted marcie rolls her eyes Manuka: isa not funny marcie: you're such a card :) wob: apparently i have shown up during really bad geek joke night. marcie: yes marcie: yes you have wob: heh Manuka: it really irqs the hell out of me... gonna have to address that issue, and ram it home. wob: marcie wob: please wob: take 'care' of yer husband wob: ;) marcie: heheh marcie: he's just got a lot of drive wob: OH MAN wob: IT DOESNT GET ANY BETTER marcie: HAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAA wob: I AM IN BAD GEEK JOKE HELL wob: I MUST PACKET MYSELF UP AND GET THE FSCK OUTA HERE marcie: you have a good case, wob Manuka: that's my boy :) wob: alas wob: i must take the default route to bed. marcie: i may have to monitor this conversation wob: and sleep() wob: shutdown -i0 -g0 -y marcie greps wob on the way out -- the geeks being punny Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 August 1999 %% marcie: i would do gina in a hot second marcie: my god marcie: that woman is amazing marcie: especially in leather cuinhell: she'd be more amazing in just skin marcie: NO SHIT cuinhell: and bouncing on my c0q marcie: no marcie: on my face marcie: dammit wob: STOP IT wob: SOTP IT wob: STOP IT wob: STOP IT YOU BITCHES wob: IM TRYING TO GET WORK DONE wob: YOU ARE EVIL wob: ALL OF YOU marcie: HArHaRHARhAHRAHRhaRHARHarHarHArHarHarHAR wob: IM GOINT TO HAVE TO MAKE A TRIP TO THE STALL marcie: you and me both wob: hahahaha -- marcie torturing the boys with pictures of Gina Gershon in leather Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 August 1999 %% *** Al has entered room 'Main' Al: hobbagoozis weeblejeebles!!!!!! marcie: you don't say? Al: yebbica noddafoondo flipticuadda bing! marcie: astounding Al: thinggy! marcie: i completely agree -- another conversation of typical intelligence Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 August 1999 %% marcafk: blar Slayer: blar! :) vanyel: marcie marcafk: yes, dammit marcafk: blar! *** marcafk is now known as mzrcie Slayer: what's up? :) mzrcie: whoops *** mzrcie is now known as marcie Slayer: i like mzrcie better :) marcie: i am dreaming bad things about gina gershon and how much i want to fuck her senseless marcie: was that too much information? Slayer: no :) marcie: O;) marcie: cool Slayer: no problem :) Slayer: so what's up? :) marcie: there's something amiss here.... Slayer: what's that? :) marcie: something really weird marcie: and fucked up marcie: i can't put my finger on it Slayer: how so? :) marcie furrows her brow and looks puzzled, then her face gets a look of horror marcie: YOU marcie: ARE USING Slayer: me? :) marcie: SMILEYS Slayer: oh no! :) marcie: AT EVERY OPPORTUNITY marcie: STOP IT marcie: RIGHT NOW marcie: DAMN YOU Slayer: oh shit, i thought i was romantic for a minute there marcie: damn marcie: thank god marcie: it IS you Slayer: thank the lesbiangods you pointed it out to me marcie: and not a pod person Slayer: pod? marcie: body snatcher Slayer: oh marcie: creepy marcie: don't do it again, man marcie: you scared me -- marcie getting scared Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 August 1999 %% Slayer: complete your progress through puberty and then i might listen to what you have to sey about sexual relationships cuinhell: HAHAH marcie: bahahahaAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA Slayer: say saundo: *KOFF* saundo: C | N > K -- Slay getting one over on Monty Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 August 1999 %% saundo: aaaaah saundo: starksy and hutch saundo: AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH saundo: Fantasy Island saundo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH saundo: Miami Vice saundo faints Slayer: hawaii 5 0 marcie oh dears marcie lures saundo with visions of Laverne and Shirley marcie: in saran wrap and stiletto heels marcie: HArHaRHAHRARHAHRAHRARAR saundo: the only good thing about hawaii five-o is the opening sequence saundo schwings saundo: oh baby saundo: more marcie: bahahahahahaha saundo: with lenny and squiggy bent over in posing pouches saundo: ah HA saundo: so THAT's why they worked at the brewery marcie shudders marcie: you are an evil man, saundo marcie: EVIL I SAY saundo: hee hee *** Kestrel has entered room 'Main' saundo: that'll teach you to taunt me Kestrel: wheeeee marcie smirks -- Saundo and marcie trading taunts Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 August 1999 %% Deanna: I've had to take the damned lid off of it do many times that I don't even put the screws back in it anymore. Slayer: exactly what kind of vagina DO you have -- Slayer, curious Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 August 1999 %% Jael: So why you moving to D? Slayer: because it's not mississippi Jael: That is a good reason Slayer: and they have lesbian bars Jael: and how does that benifit you? Slayer: atmosphere Slayer: if i'm going to not be getting laid, it might as well be by lesbians marcie: bahahahahhaa Al: hahahahah Al: I like the way this man thinks. -- Slayer getting perspective Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 August 1999 %% vanyel: it seems my penis can only handle so much input marcie: i hear that's a common bug vanyel: if you stroke it too much, it spits out what ever is in teh testicle buffer vanyel: daom, i'm a geek -- vanyel stunned into realization of his nature Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 September 1999 %% K: OBJECTS IN UNDERWEAR MAY APPEAR LARGER THAN THEY ARE -- K admitting his inadequacies Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 September 1999 %% Slayer: i dont like the term 'bisexual' ben: bisexuals don't like the term 'slayer' -- Paris and Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 September 1999 %% Slayer: of course we'd also have to all get off at the same time -- Slayer being taken out of context Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 September 1999 %% Marianne: dammit.. work keeps interfering with my chatting -- Marianne getting her priorities straight Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 1999 %% vanyel: our vp is at a dude ranch in the middle of nowhere in montana vanyel: he wants to check his email vanyel: so we ship him a satalite phone, at quite a cost vanyel: it cost us like... 800 bucks to get it to him vanyel: and he is complaining that its too slow vanyel: he has 20 megs of mail vanyel: he was on the phone for like 10 hrs and only got 2 megs vanyel: so our servers are broken,. vanyel: at this point i'd say vanyel: PICK UP YOUR FUCKING CELLPHONE vanyel: CALL YOUR SECRETARY vanyel: AND HAVE HER READ YOUR EMAIL TO YOU cuinhell: HAHHAHAHAHAHARHARHARHAHR cuinhell: whiny fucking vp's cuinhell: they get higher up in management and they get more and more whiny vanyel: we spent 300K so he can get his email in the middle of nowhere vanyel: thats not including usage for 15 hrs straight of service vanyel: thats 300,000 DOLLARS US vanyel: so a VP CAN GET HIS EMAIL on VACATION -- Vanyel having a Dilbert moment Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 1999 %% cuinhell: i use an old apple to run some servos and jerk me off while I am browsing porn wob: good application cuinhell: oh wait, i WOULD use cuinhell: ;) wob: better hope it doesnt crash on y2k and cut yer dick off. -- wob pointing out a flaw Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 1999 %% vanyel: life lesson #3208720893465923746 vanyel: kicking hardware is OK while wearing loafers. It is NOT okay when vanyel: wearing steel-toed doc martens. Kestrel: hahahahhaa Kestrel: what did you cave in? vanyel: my backup server -- vanyel learning another lesson Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 1999 %% marcie: yawn vanyel shoves his penis in marcie's mouth while the gettin is good vanyel: jesus AQUAMAN: yes? vanyel: i have just suprassed slayer in teh sick bastard catagory vanyel chastises hismelf Cyrano: vanyel: i have just suprassed slayer in teh sick bastard catagory vanyel: i dont know wether to be proud or ashamed -- vanyel being horrified Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 1999 %% Mistress: sick..you guys are just completely sick Mistress: no wonder I hang out here so much -- Mistress in admiration Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 1999 %% Slayer lays a big wet lesbian kiss on manuka Al: you're kidding Slayer: i never kid about lesbian kisses -- Slayer being himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 1999 %% wob: dave? what are you doing, dave? Sarge: nothing hal, just bend over like a good boy.... vanyel: weirdos. -- Sarge getting quoted for once Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 September 1999 %% vanyel: I hate knowing NT vanyel: itmakes me feel so cheap vanyel: its like admitting you fucked some 600lb ugly bitch -- vanyel feeling violated and used Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 September 1999 %% wob: MY OWN RAID AT HOME dweez: a raid bitch box wob: HOW GEEKY FUCKING COOL Cyrano: ahahah wob: FISHER PRICES MY FIRST RAID -- wob fantasizing Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 September 1999 %% Slayer: i wish i were god Vanyel: well Slayer: oh, so you want to ban prayer in church? HAVE A HURRICANE! Vanyel: i'm satan Vanyel: that close enough Slayer: and for all you in LA laughing at florida, HAVE AN EARTHQUAKE! Slayer: and for all you in wyoming laughing at the other two, BE WYOMING! Slayer: my will be done. Slayer: there isnt enough bowing a scraping in here dammit! -- Slayer on a power trip Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 1999 %% AQUAMAN burps AQUAMAN: hmm. AQUAMAN: I don't remember eating that. -- Aquaman getting amnesia Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 1999 %% Monty: word to your respective matriarchial figures -- Monty, werd y0 Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 1999 %% *** Al has entered room 'Main' Al: *phart* cuinhell: ASS! Al: yep, that's where it came from cuinhell: excellent -- Al and cuinhell sharing a guy bonding moment Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 1999 %% Vanyel: sex on tv is one of the best inventions of all time -- Vanyel getting off, so to speak Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 1999 %% Vanyel: well i ruined my chanced to get real pussy tonite Slayer: what, you woke up? cuinhell: he left the animal shelter -- Vanyel getting dissed Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 1999 %% ben: scronk marcie: now? ben: if you're not too busy marcie: oh all right marcie: *SCRONKSCRONKSCRONK* ben: i feel cheap and used marcie: well yeah marcie: and this is a problem why? ben: never said it was a problem ben: ;) -- Paris enjoying himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 1999 %% ben: i need sex on the side *** carrye has entered room 'Main' carrye: heyyall ben: never mind marcie: ahahahahahhah -- Carrye unwittingly walking into it Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 1999 %% beer_ed: Luser called last week, wanted me to sort through 24gigs of backups to find his index.htm (yes .htm) and restore it. beer_ed: I said, it'd be faster for you to just redo it. marcie: ahahahahahahaha marcie: you go beer_ed: Bwa.. beer_ed: Dont' you have backups? beer_ed: Yes, yes I do. L: Then why can't you get this file for me? BOFH: Because it'd take several hours for the bacup to come off of tape, and thats several hours of system disruptoin for one file marcie: heehee beer_ed: Bofh: Backups aren't for single files, unless we make a mistake here :), backups for users are for largescale problems.. beer_ed: like disk failure. beer_ed: L: I still dont' understand how this affects me. beer_ed: Bofh: It means I won't be getting your index.htm off of tape. marcie: bwahahahahahahaha beer_ed: L: then I'm going to cancel my account. Bofh: *nods* Ok. beer_ed: L: You mean you wouldnt' take my files from backup even if I won't be a customer? marcie: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA beer_ed: Bofh: No, beer_ed: L: Then what if I erase a bunch of your files and make you put them back on, then you would restore my files. marcie: oh, i KNOW he didn't beer_ed: Bofh: No, I'd terminate your account, see the AUP regarding malicious acts towards our systems. beer_ed: L: *click* beer_ed: Luser called later that day to say that he found his index.htm on his machine and put it backup, thinks we should re-examine our backup policy. beer_ed: *grins* beer_ed: Bofh 1, Luser -1 marcie smirks beer_ed: I'd like to see him try removing my files. beer_ed: if he can read/write them, then they aren't important to me *grins* beer_ed: fucking lusers.. beer_ed: gotta hate 'em! -- ed telling of his adventures Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 September 1999 %% Cyrano: 12 Seagate Elite-9's are the cream of the crop :) Al: *drewl* Cyrano: heh al Cyrano: would it help to say that I probably got them for about $6/ea al? Al pisses his pants Al shits himself Al cums pukes and sneezes Al: HOLY SHIT -- Al having a fit Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 September 1999 %% Manuka: oh, joy, did we forget to mention Fluffy to slayer? vanyel: i do. marcie snickers Slayer: what's a fluffy marcie: oh yes... fluffy marcie: the bengal tiger Manuka: Fluffy is the 450-lb bengal tigger marcie: O:) Slayer: and where is fluffy vanyel: up my ass. Manuka: he eats small children for breakfast AQUAMAN: i bet the food gets expensive then Manuka: and likes the occasional chihuaha as a tasty snack Slayer: so we're talking about marcie's vagina Manuka: DOH marcie: DOH AQUAMAN covers his eyes Psyche: that'll teach me to wake up -- marcie getting dissed Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 September 1999 %% vanyel: burp vanyel: burning mp3 cds makes me hungry marcie: fucking slacker marcie: :) Slayer backhands marcie into a table Slayer: do not talk to my boy that way marcie: fucking slut wob backhands slay into a table wob: do not talk to my sun bitch that way marcie yanks slayer's penis out and chops it off wob: you have to pry it from his fingers first marcie: oh yeah marcie: forgot -- Slayer getting dissed yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 1999 %% vanyel: stop having netsex you dorks Slayer: shut up, you'll spoil it vanyel: now look what you did, you crashed my news server Slayer: i am just that good -- Slayer and Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 1999 %% Lisa: sex is overrated wob: thats ok wob: its still rated -- w0b making a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 1999 %% Slayer: oh god Slayer: i'm listening to some slow techno shit Slayer: and momma came in to do something Slayer: so she pulled her shirt down off her sholder and started dancing sorta Slayer: i said "what are you trying to do..." marcie: ugh Slayer: she said "be sexy" marcie: so how was the sex? Slayer: my mom rules Slayer: quick marcie runs marcie: hahahhahahahahahaha -- Slayer giving us details Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 1999 %% wob: dweez is so fucking tiny dweez connnects to marcie dweez: yah - so? wob: i just dont understand wob: please wob: ESXPLAIN IT TO ME wob: SHOW ME dweez: you like my toothpickdick wob: LET ME LICK IT dweez: ok dweez: :) dweez: unzip dweez: *plink* wob: weSLCHURP* wob: crap wob: SHIT wob: ITS STUCK IN MY TEETH marcie: BAHAHAHHAAHAHA wob: i need a toothpick to pick that toothpick out vanyel: here vanyel: use my dick -- the boyz being cute Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 September 1999 %% roo: what a day... major appliance delivery is tiring wob: so is my slackass job wob: im so tired from all this slacking wob: i need to slack more. cuinhell: HAHAHAHA -- wob complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 September 1999 %% Beastie: okay tiem to fix myself soBmethiN Beastie: GTOEAT Beastie: aclk Beastie: bad cat -- Beastie getting a word in edge-wise Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 September 1999 %% marcie: fuck marcie: i need to get laid. marcie: i'm drunk enough to mention that here. Slayer: sigh... ok, just this once Slayer: Mistress: oh yes Mistress: I need to get laid too marcie: bahahhaha Mistress: come here marcie Slayer: i suppose i can do it twice marcie: woo :) marcie trots over to moni Slayer takes some vitamins -- Mistress, marcie and Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 September 1999 %% Al: My name is 1nigo M0nt0y@. You misspelled my father. Prepare to vi. -- Al being quotable Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 1999 %% Cyrano: if all scsi had been differential from the start the world would be a happier place -- Cyrano pointing out the obvious Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 1999 %% marcie: someone needs to bring me food. marcie: now. Slayer: sigh, ok Slayer: Slayer: this IS getting old -- Slayer being himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 1999 %% DontKnow: anyways, guess that I'll leave this place. I'll be sure to make an attempt to try and miss you guys and gals.. *** DontKnow has left the room: *waves* -- DontKnow being sentimental Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 September 1999 %% vanyel: its not very often that I can jack off to a movie and get confused at teh same time. -- vanyel talking about watching "Wild Things" Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 1999 %% Slayer: wolves are so beautiful Slayer: i say that just before one starts licking his ballsac -- Slay being quotable Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 1999 %% vanyel: I take back everything I say about DBA's being as dumb as shit vanyel: and next time wob tries to tell me that DBA's are a s dumb as shit, i will correct him vanyel: I would NEVER in my entire life insult shit by comparing it to a DBA -- Vanyel speaking the truth Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 September 1999 %% marcie: chickens were put on this earth for the express purpose of being killed and fried marcie: preferably by large black women AQUAMAN: or grilled marcie: no marcie: NO dammit marcie: FRIED AQUAMAN: heh marcie: that's the way the virgin Mary did chicken when Jesus was grwonig up -- marcie getting into a religious discussion Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 September 1999 %% Slayer: grease is one of the 4 major food groups marcie: damn straight Slayer: i forget the other 3 -- Slayer being Southern Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 September 1999 %% vanyel: one of th e unix guys is playing britney spears in teh computer room vanyel: should I be scared? marcie: yea marcie: you should marcie: and you should kill him and put him out of his misery vanyel: afk -- Vanyel taking care of a problem Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 1999 %% Lisa: i need a date to homecoming Cyrano: homecoming Cyrano: hrm vanyel: AHAHAHAH Lisa: I have my youth Lisa: laugh as you will -- Lisa retaining her dignity Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 1999 %% Cyrano: so meg meg: so james Cyrano: how do you cope with an overtly geek husband? Cyrano: my wife wants to know :) meg: hahhaa meg: um, i laff at him a lot Monty: heh, it'll be interesting later in life if I get married Cyrano: ahhh Cyrano: that works for my wife as well -- nothing more need be said Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 1999 %% Wicked: it's so windy out my dog cant stand still long enough to crap vanyel: now thats a lovely picture now in my head. -- Wicked sharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 1999 %% K: i'm sure they'll release a nuclear powered dildo for women in 2k -- K on progress Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 1999 %% ben: i sucessfully passed irritating programming task #1 off to a 3rd party ben: i shall now do nothing for the rest of the day cuinhell: excellent bofhing -- Paris being a sysadmin Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 1999 %% Slayer: remind me not to ask manuka why the fuck all his remotes are in coffee cups Slayer: and not ONe cup, but one cup per remote *** Lisa has been disconnected cuinhell: is there also coffee in them? Al: coffee cups. Slayer: no Slayer: not only are they all in seperate cups, but they're all angled the same direction Al: rearrange them and see if he notices Slayer: hrm, ok cuinhell: HHAHA Slayer: (what our subjects dont know is that we swithed their regular remotes for folgers instant remote controls) vanyel: ahahah Al: hee, hee -- Slay being bored Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 1999 %% dweez: i hate guys who can't speak engilsy -- Dweez Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 1999 %% Slayer: whats this goddamned rubber thing on the mouse for cuinhell: safe sex -- cuinhell giving technical advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 1999 %% vanyel: oh WERD vanyel: i love finding stuff when i clean cuinhell: found your penis? -- vanyel being domestic Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 1999 %% Al: hey saundo...ever anagram your name? Al: mine is 'deep anal riot' saundo: no, I haven't saundo: and after that, I'm not sure I want to -- Saundo being wary Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 October 1999 %% Mis: hey..friend of mine is going to be stuffing his t-day turkey with shrooms cuinhell: HAHAHHA vanyel: WERD wob: hahahahah wob: oh werd! cuinhell: inviting the family over too? vanyel: invite me wob: what a great idea wob: we did pot stuffing last year wob: mebbe we can get some shroomies and do that cuinhell: hey grandma, why you staring at the floral wallpaper like that? -- the geeks discussing the holidays Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 1999 %% Miswork: when I say the word "" what's the first definition that comes to your mind? Miswork: err Miswork: that's not the word Miswork: the word is Voluptuous marcie: moni's breasts marcie: :) Al: schwing. Miswork: ;P Miswork: seriously..what's the definition that you think of Al: schwing. Miswork: *chuckle* marcie: well marcie: heh Miswork: so...voluptuous has a positive connotation? or a negative one? marcie: actually marcie: "breasts" marcie: but that's cause i need to get laid :) -- marcie in need Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 1999 %% miri: fuck mickey mouse, thatd be cool Lisa: he is so fucking sexy Lisa: that is my fantasy vanyel: lisa, you are a sick bitch Lisa: i know Lisa: that is why you all love me -- Lisa being a sick bitch & Van being obvious Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 1999 %% Slayer: fuck you, weasel boy Vanyel: fuck you, mister, "I'm my own gravity well" -- vanyel and slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 1999 %% Vanyel: i can fill up 400 mb just by farting -- Vanyel discussing hard drive space Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 1999 %% Vanyel: who invented the 13w3 interface Vanyel: and why doesnt he share what he was smoking? -- Vanyel bitching Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 1999 %% marcie: tell me what you think of my resume marcie: www.snerk.net/resume.html Cyrano: well Cyrano: it needs more nude photos under the "Qualifications" section marcie: HArHarHaRHARHARHr -- Cyrano giving advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 1999 %% ed: I just got cursed at. Kest: cool! ed: I almost had an aneurism. ed: I think that somebody will have some evil things done to them on an hourly basis for the rest of their stay. ed: cron, don't fail me now. marcie: hahahahhahahahahaha -- ed being a BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 1999 %% marcie: marcie: Need Sun Internet Account Kit AOL software on 3.5 diskette. I don't have a marcie: cd.rom drive. marcie: HarHARHAHRAHRAHrHARHaRHaRHARhARHArHaRHARHAHrHArHarHaRHAHrArhAhrAHrAh rHaR dweez: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHHAHAHHAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHA -- marcie making fun of her lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 1999 %% sunbeam: how can i turn off the evil sounds Slayer: find the power button on your speakers adn push it vanyel: or stick a screwdriver thru each ear -- vanyel giving computer advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 1999 %% brawk: http://www.hamsterdance.com/ is ANNOYING! brawk: (go see) sunbeam: no way bro brawk: y not? sunbeam: i look at enough stuff that sucks involuntarily brawk: butt it sux in a compelling sort of way -- brawk being persuasive Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 1999 %% dweez: i hate uswest dweez: did i say that i hate them dweez: that was wrong dweez: i love them dweez: i love them soo much i wanna kill them so noone else can love them as much as i do -- dweez going a little nuts Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 October 1999 %% Vanyel: damnit Vanyel: i hate it when my dsl gets stopped up Vanyel: damn lag Vanyel: i need roto router -- Vanyel making a funny Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 October 1999 %% Cyrano: hrm Cyrano: too much music while coding Cyrano: while ((numqueue > HRFLOWWATER) || (netlog > NETHIGHWATER)) Cyrano: { Cyrano: /* how do we sleep while the beds are burning? */ Cyrano: sleep(POLLINTERVAL); -- Cyrano being a geek Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 October 1999 %% Cyrano: I want a bumper sticker that says "I *heart* b-trees" -- Cyrano on coding Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 October 1999 %% DontKnow: NFS: stale file handle vanyel: thats what you get for using nfs file handles after the "sell by" date. -- Vanyel being helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 October 1999 %% *** drunk has entered room 'Main' drunk fucks you *** drunk has left the room *** drunk has entered room 'Main' drunk fucks you *** drunk has left the room wob: uh Cloud10: hum *** K has been disconnected vanyel: wow vanyel: huh huh huh vanyel: did I just score? -- Vanyel getting hopeful Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 October 1999 %% wob: one of our cats likes to sleep on top of my sun monitor wob: cuz its warm wob: im sure there's hair in that Cyrano: ouch Cyrano: badbadbad Cyrano: I had that happen too Cyrano: kitty is also getting dosed with xrays, btw :) Cyrano: shielding on the top of those things is none too good wob: prolly why the cat is so stupid ;) -- wob on his cat Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 October 1999 %% vanyel: burp vanyel: hey marcie marcie: fart marcie: hey van marcie: we've bonded now vanyel: haha marcie: i feel all close to you -- Vanyel and marcie bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 October 1999 %% vanyel: when i masturbate, i masturbate in STEREO! -- Vanyel being quotable Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 October 1999 %% K whips it out. K slams it on the table meg: plink -- meg being sweet and loving Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 1999 %% DKwork: he's so addicted to this place that he has to be online while sick in bed. Cyrano: just between compiles :) -- Cyrano being an addicted geek Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 1999 %% rayray: megadeath, that is marcie: how was it? vanyel: megadeth rules rayray: kicked ass. lasted 9-10 hrs marcie: cool rayray: and i was up front on the floor in the pit the entire time marcie: heheh marcie: that's my girl :) vanyel: wow vanyel: chicks that mosh rule. rayray: oh, yeah, i also won the titty contest for the fron half of the arena marcie: yeah! marcie: hahahahhhaa marcie: rule! vanyel: uhh heh heh heh vanyel: I love you. rayray: *bow* marcie: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA vanyel: come to butthead. rayray: *sniff* mom would be so proud -- Vanyel trying to get a date Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 November 1999 %% wob: faggots Vanyel: you know you want it wob: thats besides the point -- wob coming out Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 November 1999 %% Slayer: one time i was masturbating with scissors and it felt nifty -- I don't even know what to say about this Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 November 1999 %% wob: you beat off with the back side of a shovel? Slayer: only when i can -- Slayer obsessed Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 November 1999 %% Slayer: oh gods, help! my penis is wrappign itself around my neck! marcie: hahahahhaah *** Slayer has been disconnected marcie: HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHAAHHAHAA -- Slayer being tortured Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 November 1999 %% *** Al has entered room 'Main' *** Sarge has been disconnected Al: and let that be a lesson to you. -- Al cracking the whip Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 1999 %% wob: yawn Al: *yawwWWWwwwn* marcafk: *YAAAAWWWWWWNNNNNN* marcafk: so there. *** marcafk is now known as marcie Al: EXPLORER caused a general protection fault Al: in module USER.EXE at 001c:000014e5. Al: Registers: Al: EAX=00002f2f CS=1697 EIP=000014e5 EFLGS=00000206 Al: EBX=00008928 SS=1227 ESP=000088cc EBP=00fe8928 Al: ECX=00240002 DS=0157 ESI=00000020 FS=11ff Al: EDX=00000010 ES=1227 EDI=000088d4 GS=0000 Al: Bytes at CS:EIP: Al: 67 8b 46 0a 67 ab 66 33 c0 40 e8 b6 f2 67 66 ad Al: Stack dump: Al: 000208b2 2f2f1677 00fef8dc 0ae20157 0ae20ae2 00081053 00020024 2f2f8928 00000020 00000ed4 00000001 00000ed0 00000000 0ed00020 0ed00000 02000ed4 Al: see what you did? -- Al being stern Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 1999 %% marcie: *rayray* we probably would've slept together the other night if he hadn't of marcie: had to go to work marcie: rayray> damn his seductive ways marcie: *rayray* damn walmart, damn themto HELL!! marcie: rayray> BAHAHAAHAHAA marcie: *rayray* sorry, the sexual frustration was speaking...ever so sorry marcie: rayray> do carry on marcie: discuss rayray> sorry, had to do it ;) sunbeam: i just don't know what to say marcie: heh hheh heh sunbeam: marcie, quite frankly i'm disturbed and shocked rayray: thank you ever so much marcie: yes marcie: 'as you should be marcie: ray: welcome :) rayray: you put that in the wrong order too rayray> i'm laughing so hard i've got tears rolling down my face rayray: you are such a bitch marcie: i know marcie: but you love that about me rayray: well, i trained you well marcie: yes marcie: yes you did -- rayray and marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 November 1999 %% vanyel: my penis is full of peepee vanyel: i must go release the peepee into the wild vanyel: afk -- Vanyel going, um, native Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 1999 %% Kestrel: you need a battery boyfiriend lisa Lisa: you are so thoughtful Kestrel: it's a gift -- Kestrel being sensitive Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 1999 %% vanyel: i am a veteran too vanyel: i am a veteran of NT. marcie: oooh marcie: combat training vanyel: yes -- Vanyel on Veteran's Day Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 1999 %% Cyrano: http://www.mds.mdh.se/~elt94aem/babe.htm vanyel: um james? vanyel: i worry about you sometimes vanyel: and your wife vanyel: and your children Cyrano: I had a lonely childhood, ok? -- Cyrano on the "Cow Babe of the Month" Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 1999 %% Paris: i wouldn't be dicking around in this town if i were part of a global, wealthy conspiracy -- Paris on the Great Jewish Conspiracy Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 November 1999 %% saundo: I have a endearing like of phone companies saundo: in the same way i like having rusty nails inserted rectally while suffering a bout of galloping dysentery cuinhell: whoa cuinhell: your weekends must be incredible -- cuinhell in admiration Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 November 1999 %% u235: she loves daddy too, but mom is the center of the universe u235: must big her big ass that makes the rest of the universe orbit her -- u235 on his daughter Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 November 1999 %% Mistress: ok..cross uyour fingers and toes, I'm putting NT on my 98 machine Hobbs: On purpose? -- Hobbs questioning Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 November 1999 %% Al: in my entire life, I've only met one man who can out-fart me consistently Al: and that man is my father. marcie: he must be so proud -- Al being his father's son Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 1999 %% saundo: why am I thinking "did they do vibrator tests?" on the "A Current Affair" "Great Battery Test" tish: *snicker* saundo: now ThAT's demanding tish: *ROFL* tish: duracell tish swears by em saundo: don't you think "everready" is more appropriate? marcie: HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA -- Saundo being witty Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 1999 %% marcie: type 6 keyboards are purty saundo: *KOFF* saundo: dammit marcie marcie: yes? marcie: *blinikblink* saundo: marcie: type 6 keyboards are purty saundo: marcie: type 6 keyboards are purty saundo: *ROFL* marcie: yes? you rang? marcie: :) saundo: I've got this southern voice in my head saying that marcie: wahahahaahhahhaha saundo: and I'm LAFFING myself senseless marcie snickers -- marcie making Saundo spew his coffee Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 1999 %% saundo: people are getting dumber marcie: definitely marcie: the gene pool is getting tainted elric: I stopped watching tv after space ghost was over saundo: it's getting shallower marcie: needs chlorine tish: is that why we nesters are inbreeding? saundo: frankly, I won't be surpised when you wimmin start keeping breeding stock marcie: start? marcie looks innocent tish: ahahahaha saundo: AHAHAHHAHAHA saundo: MARCIE marcie: damn you, tishy... you let him in on the secret! -- Saundo finding out about the conspiracy Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 1999 %% marcie burps tish: catchy -- tish and marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 1999 %% vanyel: i wrote a perl script last month vanyel: it crashed 3 nt servers -- Vanyel learning programming Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 1999 %% Mistress: Just got snail mail adressed to Monihee Pixon brawk: heheh brawk: Monihee Pixon saundo: whoa DL: i'm awake now saundo: talk about mangled Mistress: oh great..and it's a rebate check rom Eudora. Which means that cashing this is going to be really interesting brawk: el oh el Mistress: as it's made out to Monihee Pixon Mistress: worse thing is that I filled out the rebate information ON LNIE Mistress: err Mistress: Line marcie: aahahahahahah marcie: Mistress: worse thing is that I filled out the rebate information ON LNIE marcie: you think maybe that explains it? ;) marcie runs -- Moni finding home row Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 1999 %% sunbeam: i don't care what everybody says about you Kes, I like ya Kesticle: heh Kesticle: that will pass sunbeam: yeah it already did Kesticle: there ya go -- Sunbeam and Kes bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 November 1999 %% sunbeam: oh guess what i have Slayer: a 17" solid gold dildo Slayer: we want to see sunbeam: i sold that at a yard sale last year marcie: ahahahahaa -- sunbeam being cute Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 November 1999 %% tish idly braids saundo's chest hair tish: *yawn* marcie raises an eyebrow saundo: OW tish: hey, it was there tish: calling to me Paris: pluck it with tweezers tish: "tish...braid me..." tish: what was i supposed to do? tish: ignore it? tish: naaaahh saundo: YES -- Tish flirting with Saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 1999 %% saundo: post-it notes - the rat droppings of today's sweat shops -- Saundo being quotable Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 1999 %% brawk: LM is a big-ass defense contractor; can you deal with the karmma? cuinhell: karma. you get a karma bonus by working for any company who contributes to the extinction of man brawk: lol marcie: werd -- cuinhell on marcie's Lockheed-Martin job Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 December 1999 %% Cyrano: kind of hurts your eyes, doesn't it? vanyel: it hurts my soul. -- vanyel on a Sparc with gold metallic feet and a blue case, on eBay Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 December 1999 %% elric prays to meg meg: bless you elric meg: you shall have eternal rewards elric: like wobs ass? meg: if that's what you want -- meg being generous Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 December 1999 %% marcie: i love it when women are dependent on me for all their technical needs marcie: they get all needy marcie: it's cool wob: hahaha wob: is that when you get out the whip? marcie: wob: yes, dammit marcie: and the handcuffs Al: marcie, I know and love that feeling wob: werd -- marcie and the boys on how to woo women Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 December 1999 %% *** Paris has entered room 'Main' marcie: b3n Paris: marcie =) Paris: what up, chica? marcie: nammuch marcie: talking to my girlfriend, helping her build a web page Paris: what sort of webpage? marcie: personal marcie: as opposed to school endorsed :) Paris: alas, personal webpages Paris: they are like life marcie: her first one Paris: you work on 'em, and you work on 'em Paris: and then it occurs to you -- it'll make no difference to your life at all if you didn't work on 'em, cause no-one will visit Paris: life is like that marcie: ahahahaha marcie: yer so profound, ben Paris: every so often, i think, "hey, i am bored, i'll make a personal webpage!" Paris: and then I get very depressed marcie: it's a vicious cycle Paris: that's why I am sticking to sex-goddess fansites now marcie: good call -- Paris getting philosophical Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 1999 %% cuinhell: how do you pronounce "I need a smoke before I have to make someone die"? Wicked: addict? -- Wicked being accurate Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 1999 %% wob: DWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZIE wob: you HO dweez: wobbieEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeho! wob: hi wob: :) dweez: hehehe dweez: hey punk wob: whats up you faggot dweez: my butt is smelly wob: neato wob: can i penetrate it? dweez: please do. wob: *THEEEEERUST* marcie: that's so sweet. meg: and who said men aren't romantic -- meg and marcie, touched Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 1999 %% vanyel: i think im gonna patent urination -- vanyel getting an Idea(tm) Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 1999 %% Cyrano: been playing with my solid state disk Cyrano: Non-removable Disk: WALI RAMSTOR 48 MEG HW2 [ASL] Al: why did my tape drive just click? Al: 2,258 files totalling 2,415,771,008 bytes. Al: 18 files down, almost a tenth of the mass. vanyel: fart vanyel: i parsed ramstor as hamster Al: it has a scsi cable, not duct tape -- the start of the infamous 48MB Hamster Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 1999 %% Mistress: speaking of which..i have to retire my vibrator. My 1st vibrator and my first orgasm when I was 21. The vibrator died on Saturday Mistress: a moment of silence please -- Monika getting all emotional Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 1999 %% vanyel: i can see meg and wob with a vcrying baby, trying to get it to toke wob: i look forward to being a dick when im old marcie: vanyel: i can see meg and wob with a vcrying baby, trying to get it to toke tish: ahahahaha van marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA wob: and claim its being some old desiease wob: damn right wob: a stoned baby has got to be mellow vanyel: right on wob: no crying wob: hell of an appetite tho i bet meg: hahahha marcie: ahahahahhaaha vanyel: STOP CRYING AND SMOKE IT, YOU FUCKING CHILD! wob: even more so than they would normally meg: make mommy lose weight damn fast -- meg and wob on breeding Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 1999 %% *** Jake has entered room 'Main' marcie: Oh, jake Jake: hi Jake: anything exciting happen?? marcie: wob converted to hare krishna and shaved his head Jake: your shitting me Jake: for real? marcie: i'm becoming the world's first lesbian protestant nun Jake: I know one of those, lives two floors up marcie: and dweez is gettinga new job sitting under my desk pleasuring me at regular intervals marcie: other than that marcie: kind of a slow night Jake: well, catholic Jake: he really shaved his head marcie: oh yeah man marcie: it looks sweet marcie: he got a darth maul tattoo too Jake: I can't wait to make fun of the bastard Jake: in a couple of weeks Jake: ergh *** Jake has left the room marcie: i am going to hell -- marcie being evil Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 1999 %% sunbeam: sounds good to me, what's your girl problem all about? Vanyel: same shit, different girl Vanyel: shes fucking other guys Cyrano: won't indulge his rubber chicken fetish Vanyel: that too -- Vanyel lamenting Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 1999 %% marcie: let's see how shitfaced we can get without mom noticing rayray: i can probably get crawling and she wouldn't notice rayray: so lets do it:) marcie: werd!@#! marcie: see, that's the thing marcie: i get clumsy when i'm drunk rayray: she's seen me a couple of times shiiittty and didn't notice marcie: my proximity radar goes all to shit marcie: ahahaahah rayray: you get better w/ practice marcie: no doubt rayray: therefore you must spend the rest of your time up there in a drunken haze in order to prepare rayray: *grin* rayray: i will do the same marcie: outstanding rayray: starting w/ Dan's party Sat. I would say tomorrow night, but i have to work marcie: details marcie: i've been drunk at work before rayray: yeah, i have, too, at McD's marcie: i've been drunk at sun rayray: but not where it would be an FCC violation marcie: they actually don't care if you drink, as long as it doesn't interfere with your job rayray: "and your wedther isshh...i have it shere somewheresh" marcie: bwahahahahha marcie: try saying "kxkz exclusive in-studio color weather radar" when you're sloshed marcie: hell, try saying it sober rayray: i was just thinking that rayray: i almost said the "dixie shits" one night marcie: bwahahahhahha marcie: excellent! rayray: that would not have been cool marcie: are you kidding, that would have RULED rayray: dave says that on my last night i should give the "dummy" weather forecast marcie: "we have weather" marcie: ? rayray: "today will be sunny, tonight dark. anything else, go look out you're damn door!" rayray: i am sorely tempted marcie: wahahaha marcie: you are my hero rayray: but i had some call at 5am b/c i forgot to give the current temp, so i think it might get noticed marcie: damn shame rayray: i know rayray: don't these ppl. have better things to do then listen to me? i know i do marcie: exactly my point marcie: they actually expect you to tWORK? please. rayray: that's whay I say, but noone cares marcie: yeah marcie: bastard shits -- rayray and marcie plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 December 1999 %% wob: you fucking bitches K: crackah ass crackah!! wob: i havent had pot in 5 ddays wob: its not a good thing K: 5??!?! wob: well mebbe it is K: i know the feeling man wob: but its lame -- wob bitching Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 1999 %% Kestrel: where is that horses ass DK? Kestrel: I feel the need to pick on the handicapped -- Kestrel sharing the luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 1999 %% Manuka can already picture mom wrapping herself in this huge, luxurious, fluffy towel and getting a big grin marcie: i hope you're not picturing her naked in that towel marcie runs like the little bitch she is Manuka: EWWWWWWWW Manuka chases after marcie with a wet towel marcie: duod marcie: i've seen it before marcie: it's NOT a pretty sight rayray pukes Manuka: I did NOT need that mental image, thankyouverymuch rayray: as if any of us did marcie snickers evilly Manuka: hey, could be worse.. could be dad naked. Manuka runs like 'ell marcie: EWWWWWW' rayray: yew...i accidently saw that once marcie: i'm so sorry marcie: childhood trauma is tough to overcome Manuka: heehee rayray: i should be in therapy right now but i can't afford it marcie: bwahahahhhaha marcie: me too Manuka: well, i can flash you and erase all the bad memories Manuka: gives whole new meaning to flash reprogramming marcie: and put new ones in their place rayray: i've seen your butt; that was enough,thanks -- ewwwww! Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 1999 %% cuinhell: marcie, please dress up like a sheep for me for christmas marcie: ok marcie: i'll do that after i dress up like a catholic school girl for my gf Mistress dies Mistress: oh please..a little warning before you say things like that cuinhell: whoa! cuinhell: wait, no need to change that costume when you are done with her :) Mistress: ever cuinhell: HAHHAHA cuinhell: catholic school girls just have big "molest me" signs floating above their heads marcie snickers marcie: y'all are as bad as she is :) cuinhell: thank you :) Mistress curtesy's -- cuinhell and moni leering Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 December 1999 %% sunbeam: i just wish he'd call me up and say he's sorry for being an uncommunicative asshole and that he really loves me and I"m the only girl for him blah blah blah sunbeam: well how come i feel like i'm the loser here? cuinhell: because you haven't attacked him with a sharpened garden implement DKwork: sun, he's the loser, he lost you. sunbeam: well i don't want to break up cuinhell: murder isn't breaking up -- sunbeam getting relationship advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 December 1999 %% Cyrano: reminds me of my comment last night Cyrano: looking at a 2048x2048 blowup of an open-mouth cumshot and the first thought was "wow, she's got good teeth!" -- Cyrano getting OLD Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2000 %% saundo: ahhahahahah saundo: "Incredible advances in acupuncture" saundo: JESUS CHRIST saundo: it's as old as the hills, I think it's pretty well sorted by now -- saundo making a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2000 %% cuinhell: you black hearted biznitch, how dare you say guinness at this hour when I am stuck at work *** vanyel is now known as LUNCHyel wob: who said that marcie: muahahahahaha marcie: marcie: guinness marcie: marcie: guinness marcie: marcie: guinness marcie: marcie: guinness marcie: marcie: guinness wob: /kick marcie marcie: heheheheh wob: dammit wob: I WANT BEER marcie: hey, i'm suffereing just as much as y'all are marcie: :) wob: BUT YOU DIDNT HAVE TO BRING YER SUFFERING UP, BITCH!@%!@ marcie: bwahahahahahha wob: hehe marcie: SUFFER WITH ME, BITCH!!@#! wob: i feel yer pain marcie: damn straight -- marcie being cruel Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2000 %% Vanyel: man Vanyel: i feel like going trenchcoat on my employers Vanyel: i dunno where all this evil is comming from Vanyel: but it feels GOOD -- Vanyel achieving Zen Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2000 %% vanyel: i bet that thing is rackmountable Al: EVERYTHING is rackmountable Al: just use enough duct tape -- Al making a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2000 %% Cyrano: I did a whole machine lab once named after homonyms Cyrano: "there", "their", "theyre", etc Cyrano: was in a sadistic mood at the time I guess -- Cyrano Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 January 2000 %% Cyrano: it's a truly weird world Cyrano: USB support for OpenVMS -- Cyrano scaring everyone Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 2000 %% K: what was it about doing acid in the 60's that made so many people forget to bathe -- K dissing the hippies Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2000 %% Britisch: Come bomb me. I've got a little surprise for you. :) marcie: don't tell me... you're an army boy Sarge: if he won't eat out a woman he's got to be Navy marcie marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH Sarge: squid boy vanyel: MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH vanyel: oh sarge vanyel: you get a good zinger off every couple months or so marcie grins -- Sarge meeting his quota Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2000 %% Cyrano: server error on the IRS site Cyrano: boy this makes me feel good about our govt -- Cyrano being a patriotic American Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2000 %% Lisa: and he said that he hates being creative Lisa: so i was like Lisa: uhm Lisa: lame wob: DID YOU DO IT Lisa: no meg: why not Lisa: b/c can you imagine how boring sex would be with a nerd like that wob: how do you know meg: yes meg: AHR HAR wob: she is in jest -- wob defending his manhood Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2000 %% Vanyel: marcie, sing me a lullabye so i can sleep marcie: iiiiiit's a small world aaaaafter alllll marcie: iiiiiit's a small world aaaaafter alllll Vanyel: great Vanyel: now ill have nightmares Vanyel: bitch marcie: muahahahahahhahaha marcie: i'm such an evil shit sometimes -- marcie torturing vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2000 %% Cyrano: Jan 18 20:28:10 raichu unix: WARNING: Drive not ready before set_features Cyrano: Jan 18 20:28:10 raichu unix: WARNING: /pci@1f,0/pci@1,1/ide@3/dad@0,0 (dad0): Cyrano: Jan 18 20:28:10 raichu transport rejected (-2) Cyrano: oh SHIT vanyel: oh my vanyel: ide maacht spas wob: hah wob: HAH HAH HAH vanyel: hey wob wob: hi vanyel: does your ass ever reject transport when dweez shoves his dick in? wob: never. wob: it may renegotiate speed vanyel: wob's ass must be scsi wob: but thats about it. vanyel: wob has a scuzzy ass wob: IM PLUG AND PLAY, BAYBEE -- wob declaring his luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2000 %% Cyrano: I think the IP stack is constipated now Cyrano: it's just sitting there making grunting noises vanyel: james vanyel: i cannot wait until you are only a few miles from me Cyrano: ? vanyel: so i can kick your ass properly for these images ypu put in my head Cyrano: bah -- Cyrano taunting Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 January 2000 %% Cyrano: I had a really twisted thought earlier Cyrano: a Sun Ultra 5 board would fit perfectly in an iMac vanyel: ... vanyel: james, put your wife on Cyrano: aheh marcie: gawd Cyrano: she's snarfing ice cream at the moment vanyel: i need to tell her to watch your diet or soemthin -- Vanyel getting worried Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 January 2000 %% Cyrano: No match for "NIPPLEFEST.COM". vanyel: and people say all teh good domain names are taken -- geeks Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 January 2000 %% Mistress: dammit! I'm a woman with a full, spongy uterus! GIVE ME CHOCOLATE -- Mistress PMS'ing Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 January 2000 %% marcie eats a tuna fish sandwich tishy: yummy Vanyel: only a lesbian can say that and get a chuckle wob: TASTES LIKE wob: AHR HAR HARHARHAR wob: yeah. marcie: damn right marcie: :) -- marcie being the life of the party Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2000 %% Slayer: would it be wrong to answer a lady's personal ad and say "i'll go out with you if i can sleep with the daughters" marcie: ahahahahhahahhahah wob: no way duod wob: go fer it wob: on the theory of the more the merrier wob: ITS A FAMILY AFFAIR marcie: no matter what happens in the world, life goes on, the sun rises and sets, and slay continues to be a pervert marcie: it's oddly reassuring Slayer: i am one of the primal forces of nature -- Slayer being himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2000 %% Beastie: oysters make me shit alot more. not much of an aphrodsiac. -- Beastie being romantic Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 February 2000 %% Cyrano: there's a guy who posted an ad for his mp3 exchanger across 35000 newsgroups Slayer: i would physically harm him Cyrano: and said at the bottom, "if your newsgroup isn't appropriate for this, please email me at this address and I will take it off" Cyrano: I sent him 35000 emails Cyrano: one for each ng Slayer: cool Slayer: i love you Cyrano: they started bouncing after 7000 or so though Cyrano: so I will resend them out of cron every night Cyrano: until they all go through Slayer: why do people insist on making me want to rape them with the broad side of a toaster -- Cyrano exacting revenge Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 2000 %% Slayer: i'll attest to the fact that roleplaying does _not_ help you get chicks wob: neither dues knowing unix Paris: speak for yourself Slayer: unless you're in to weird freaky moon-tanned psycho chicks who laugh at bad jokes Slayer: which pretty much is every roleplaying chick i've ever met dassin: Now wait a minute dassin glares at Slayer Paris: dassin just did a little math there -- dassin getting offended Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2000 %% rockjock: exactly when does mid-life begin, so I know when to start my crisis? -- rockjock, confused Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 February 2000 %% *rayray* most of the time i don't even remember that i have a bfriend -- rayray showing him that she cares Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2000 %% Slayer: slay is asleep, this is his penis rayray: this could get ugly Slayer: i'm insulted rayray: :) Slayer: slay's penis is beautiful vanyel: anything that small is beautiful, isnt it -- Van putting the smack down Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2000 %% Slayer jumps on mistress and converts her to heterosexuality Mistress: nice try -- Slayer failing in his mission Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 February 2000 %% tish: i hate buying chocolates...that whole forrest gump thing Manuka: I'm bored and tired, guess I'll go wank tish: all i got was creams...i want nuts too marcie: heh tish: god that sounded...well....heh -- Manuka and tishy, unedited Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 February 2000 %% DKwork: a bunch of geeks throwing a kegger doens't make for a very entertaining party. Cyrano: go bobbing for simms -- DK and Cyrano being geeks Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 February 2000 %% Lisa: this is sad. Lisa: really sad Monty: Al: wherefore do you ask? Lisa: this guy asked me what i looked like (include size) Lisa: so i tol him i was 379 pounds, and i was 5'9 Lisa: he stopped talking to me. Lisa: and what is sad Lisa: is i thought it was f unny. Lisa: funny Al: that -is- funny Al: I didn't think you were that tall Monty: AHAHAHAHAHAHhahAHAH marcie: hahahahhahahahahahahhaah Lisa: hah. -- Lisa on online relationships Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2000 %% Jake: I'm trying to quit smoking wob: good luck Jake: and I've been having fucked up dreams Jake: i had this dream the other noght where i had sex with a life sized cigarrette wob: HAHAHAHAHAHAH -- Jake having a nic fit Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2000 %% Jake: i wanna find a crazy crack-whore slut to take with me to NM Jake: mess with the family wob: hahahaha wob: i should bring meg and another chick wob: and have both on my arms Jake: "no suzy dont hump the couch wob: that would fuck them up too Jake: "bad skank" Jake: "no crack for you" wob: "be a good gurl and sit and you'll get anothr rock" Jake: hahahaha Jake: ill wear a polyester suit wob: hahaha wob: yes wob: with platform shoes Jake: shaft wob: with heels that have water in them, that have goldfish swimming inside Jake: he a bad mutha shut yo moth! Jake: shaft Jake: yeah baby wob: yer damn right. -- Jake and w0b plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2000 %% cuinhell: van, you are close to san fran right? vanyel: kinda close vanyel: about 30 miles cuinhell: are you gay yet? -- cuinhell inquiring Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 February 2000 %% Mistress offers cu an areolae of his very own cuinhell: woo! vanyel: that reminds me vanyel: im thirsty -- vanyel, Moni and breasts Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 February 2000 %% vanyel: okay vanyel: marcie gets the popcorn vanyel: every company should provide some kind of childcare. Mistress: ya..espically the car insurance one Mistress: uck AQUAMAN turns down the music meg: hi vanyel: its bad enough when users get into the computer room... vanyel: but imagine a computer room full of 6-10 year old kids vanyel: imagine these kids running amuck throughout all of the ovvices marcie: oh dear Mistress: pushing blinky buttons vanyel: rebooting machines youre trying to build, so get solitare to come up on them marcie: oh jesus dude vanyel: having some little brat attaching himself to you, asking tons of stupiduser questions vanyel: whileyou go looking for his mom vanyel: who is at lunch cuinhell: HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA HAHAHAHAH vanyel: even if said childcare is locking all the kids in a room withan armed guard cuinhell: leave lots of exposed bare wires carrying 220v vanyel: thats enough. vanyel: -- Vanyel on his love for children Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 February 2000 %% vanyel: irix makes it easier tho *** mobbarle has entered room 'Main' mobbarle: hello mobbarle: what is this place? marcie: why does irix make it easier? isn't sendmail sendmail? marcie: mobbarle, this is the ninth circle of hell marcie: welcome to it mobbarle: wow mobbarle: i was looking for the 8th marcie: that's auggie vanyel: thats bbs.theschwartz.net vanyel 5's marcie mobbarle: later marcie high5s van *** mobbarle has been disconnected -- Vanyel and marcie sharing a brain Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 February 2000 %% Sarge: you are getting sleepy, very sleepy *** sunbeam has been disconnected Sarge: damn vanyel: now see what you did -- Sarge going too far Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2000 %% Slayer: something else funny Slayer: we have no forks Slayer: not "we have no clean forks" marcie: heh Slayer: but we have no forks, period Slayer: no dirty ones Slayer: no clean ones marcie: i believe it marcie: we need new silverware anyway Slayer: i looked for 5 minutes and finally used a plastic one AQUAMAN: how is that funny? that's anal, not funny. Slayer: actually, check on ian's desk, you might find 20 of them Slayer: i do have 1 in here Slayer: i accept the blame for it marcie: hang on to it marcie: guard it with your life Slayer: why do you think it's in here marcie: you may not get a chance to get another one -- Slayer getting domestic Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2000 %% Slayer: my kids will turn out great Al: punk-ass little varmint. Slayer: exactly -- Slayer contemplating parenthood Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2000 %% Sarge: I've seen your domain in my web logs cu, especially in the picture of me page Sarge: something like 5000 hits Sarge: you dirty little boy cuinhell: i ruined 4 monitors shooting all over that picture Sarge: you should just buy a nice color printer, it would be cheaper cuinhell: you're so cute with semen dripping off your chin. but you already know that -- the boys flirting Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2000 %% vanyel: jk J.K. Muthukumarsamy vanyel: for a million dollars, pronounce that name cuinhell: Muthukumarsamy cuinhell: there -- cuinhell winning a million bucks Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2000 %% vanyel: slay Slayer: what vanyel: i forgot -- the boys displaying intelligence Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 March 2000 %% *** K has entered room 'Main' K: 1 mother fucker 2 mother fuckin 3 K: it's the hip hop thugstah Kapital K K: so I grab the mic and then i clear my throat K: first crackah spittin lyrics in a straight coat K: it's easy for me to come off like this K: so you can kiss my ass where the sunrays miss K: or just gimmie the pussy, and I'll be straight K: and if you don't.. fuckit, I'll masturbate *** K has left the room -- K, werd Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 March 2000 %% vanyel: one fucking cocksucker comes up to me on friday and tells me I have to rebuild a server he wrecked. wob: hahahahaha wob: i love that one vanyel: i told him since he wrecked it, he can rebuild it vanyel: cuz if I rebuild it, he wont get root vanyel: i changed root on the 2 production servers vanyel: which is all I care about -- Vanyel being a BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 March 2000 %% marcie: yes, apparently they thought i was going to corrupt the moral integrity of their site by doing the design for it marcie: never mind tha ti have nothing to do with content marcie: the sick part is it's a pediatric site, so they probably had a shit fit about some queer coming near a site for kids... who knows what things go through their tiny brains Mistress: geezes vanyel: youll put fag propaganda in the meta tags! marcie: YES! cuinhell: yikes marcie: it's that damned homosexual conspiracy! vanyel: youll make MILLIONS OF IUNWITTING CHILDREN INTO FLAMING EVIL FAGGOTS! Mistress: subliminal meta tags marcie: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA cuinhell: you are trying to make us all gay!!! marcie: YES marcie: YOU WILL CUM TO THE DARK SIDE vanyel: being gay is good. be gay like me Mistress: we want our toaster ovens marcie: AND BECOME ONE WITH FAGGOTRY cuinhell: HELP ME, I CAN FEEL MY WRISTS GOING LIMP FROM JUST TALKING TO YOU vanyel: oh, silly vanyel: dont be so SILLY! marcie: nonono... it's THILLY Mistress: short hair on women is cute marcie: hahahahhahahahaha Mistress: men should swish Mistress: ohh..people suck marcie: better check to make sure you're not bringing your car to a gay mechanic! marcie: or your clothes to a gay dry cleaner! marcie: or buying books at a bookstore they carries fag books! marcie: oh my GOD! marcie: THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!! -- marcie and the Great Homosexual Conspiracy Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2000 %% Cyrano: -rw-r--r-- 1 james users 8621964 Jul 31 1999 serengeti.igs Cyrano: I almost forgot I had those Cyrano: blueprints for the ue12k :) marcie: geek. Cyrano: -rw-r--r-- 1 james users 6183621 Jul 31 1999 daktari-layout.igs wob: is this where i act suprised that you have this? wob: if so, let me know Cyrano: ok wob: ;) wob: OH WOW Cyrano: now I just need to find an IGS viewer *** Monty has been disconnected wob: THATS NEATO wob: heh Cyrano: ahahahah -- wob and Cyrano being geekly Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2000 %% Cyrano: ok, how about a "Sysadmin Studs" pictorial Cyrano: Evi Nemeth pinups! wob: HAHAHAHAAHEW wob: she was hot wob: at one point wob: long ago wob: those days tho wob: are long gone Cyrano: rofl Cyrano: better than Grace Hopper :) wob: this is true marcie: since grace hopper is DEAD marcie: ;) Cyrano: ok then Cyrano: Eric Allman pumping books of sendmail code Cyrano: ultimate weight training marcie: heheheh Cyrano: Bill Joy bench-pressing an Ultra 450 wob: you just need to stop while yer ahead -- wob and Cyrano scaring me Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2000 %% Al: what sort of documents does this juggernaut analyze? Cyrano: web documents Cyrano: and the code is actually fairly light Cyrano: just has huge resource requirements Cyrano: most of it in a few 4 * 29^5 dimensional arrays Al: huh? Al: I'm sorry, you just bypassed the capabilities of my cerebrum Cyrano: big heap data -- Cyrano using the technical term Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2000 %% lisa: what is the easiest way to get a splinter out? Al: amputate -- Al giving medical advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2000 %% Cyrano: I once had to bring up a token ring card under IRIX Cyrano: I think it scarred me for life vanyel: ahahah -- Cyrano in therapy Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2000 %% vanyel: goddamnit vanyel: JAMES vanyel: THJERE ARE NAKED COWS HERE vanyel: AND PEOPLE HAVING SEX WITH FURNATURE vanyel: bah *** vanyel has been disconnected -- Vanyel going a little nuts Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2000 %% vanyel: i got yelled at for cussing out the helpdesk one night vanyel: i had a date and they kept paging me vanyel: for a novell server in tokoyo vanyel: you all knw how rarely i get laid vanyel: so you can imagine i was pissed :D -- Vanyel and his sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 March 2000 %% vanyel: you know how I know there is a god? vanyel: whenever i go on a road trip, there are only 2 radio stations i can eventually get vanyel: both are jesus evangilist statrions marcie: hahahahahahhahahahaah marcie: dammit van, stop being so quotable marcie: people are going to to think we're sleeping together vanyel: okay vanyel: ahahahah -- Vanyel being spiritual Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 March 2000 %% vanyel: okay vanyel: lesson one in clustering vanyel: giving 8 machines teh same IP address IS NOT CLUSTERING. -- Vanyel giving Irix tips Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 March 2000 %% Cyrano gives wob a 900mhz overclocked celeron with 32MB RAM, an EIDE disk, and a parallel-port zipdrive DKwork: 32MB RAM? give him at least 256Mb. DKwork: or give him barely 8Mb. Cyrano: oh, and a video card that's bigger than the motherboard DKwork: and some full height disk drives? and at least two fans for the case Cyrano: dk, I'm trying to create the computer equivalent of a slammed lowrider honda accord -- Cyrano being a pimp daddy Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2000 %% Cyrano: there is very little to do with zen in sendmail Cyrano: sendmail.cf is more like a long drawn out Zippy cartoon -- Cyrano with an interesting perspective Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 March 2000 %% K: marcie also sucks strange dick rayray: it runs in the family -- marcie's loving sister, rayray Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2000 %% Cyrano: marcie: JIZZ Cyrano: wob: deep. Cyrano: marcie: CUM Cyrano: wob: dicking. Cyrano: marcie: ORGASM marcie: that was almost poetry Cyrano: that was a masterpiece of free association -- wob and marcie sharing a brain Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2000 %% Cyrano: hrm Cyrano: anyone need a machined aluminum cock ring? wob: uh no Cyrano: just disassembled an old maxtor 5.25" fh drive Cyrano: and I have all these aluminum ring spacers... Cyrano: ah well Cyrano: too many hours without sleep -- Cyrano and sex toys Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2000 %% vanyel: james vanyel: ok, boneheaded move od teh day vanyel: i have a candy bar and an aui transceiver right on my desk vanyel: about the same shape and size Cyrano: ahahahah -- Vanyel not paying attention Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 March 2000 %% rayray: ok, much better Al: 4 has heft hw requirements Al: hefty marcie: did everything come out okay? rayray: yeah, but joey needs to get his damn snakes out of the bathroom Al: 3 will run nicely on a 486 laptop w/ 200mb hdd marcie: snakes? rayray: snakes marcie looks fearful Al: snakes? rayray: the anaconda is in the draw (quite the surprise when you don't know its there) and the boa hangs out inthe fake tree marcie: ahahahaaHAHAHAHAA rayray: drawer, that is rayray: at least the boa stays put...the other one sticks its head out and hisses evertime i go in and scares the shit outta me rayray: figuretively, speaking that is -- rayray and the menagerie Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 March 2000 %% rayray: is our family just so normal that we have to pick up dysfunction from others, or what? -- rayray on her screwed up friends Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 March 2000 %% Slayer: of all the things ive lost i miss my virginity the least Cyrano: don't worry slay, you'll find it again -- Cyrano consoling Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 March 2000 %% Slayer: cyrano can go to hell though AQUAMAN chuckles vanyel: jamez is my gay lover vanyel: so you just shut up Slayer: i knew it Cyrano: slay linzee: lol this is what i love about being back here marcie: i love you guys -- linzee and marcie feeling the luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 March 2000 %% vanyel: I hated irix untiul I got to know it vanyel: kinda like slay -- Vanyel getting all cozy with Slay Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 March 2000 %% cuinhell: marcie: i have to kill you now and assume your form cuinhell: nothing personal, I just want that sweet ass job marcie: heheheheh marcie: yeah, manuka was all like, "you suck! YOU SUCK!" cuinhell: well, he probably meant that in a more demanding way -- cuinhell on marcie's sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2000 %% Slayer: i actually used AIX a few minutes ago finally vanyel: what did you think of it Slayer: it looked green -- Slayer utilizing his technical skillz Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 April 2000 %% brawk: Moni is the root of all evil--that's quite a responsibility -- brawk in admiration Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2000 %% vanyel: DK marcie: hi dk vanyel: if you are ever in california, you will take my one-day course on SLACKING. vanyel: or you can probably take a class from my affiliate in denver vanyel point to marcie marcie: it would have been a week long class, but he never got around to writing the rest of the curriculum vanyel: if you show up for the class, you automatically fail -- Van & marcie contributing to higher education Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2000 %% K: have you fucked with win2k server much vanyel: yeah i have K: what you think vanyel: instead of being the diharea that nt4 is, its nice solidly regular shit -- Vanyel giving Microsoft high praise Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2000 %% vanyel: you know, i could back up this shit better with a pen and paper -- Vanyel complaining about backups Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2000 %% vanyel: JESUS MOTHERFUCKING DAUGHTERLICKING LESBIONIC PATCH QUILTED SEMEN GARGLING FUCKER linzee: wow -- Vanyel being possessed by daemons Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2000 %% vanyel: que matrix tiene! marcie: heheh marcie: you understand spanish? vanyel: a little marcie: cool vanyel: i failed it 3 times in high schoo, so i should remember some -- Vanyel, an educated man Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2000 %% vanyel: homosexuale! wob: puto! marcie: where? vanyel: wearing your boxers! marcie: ahahahahha -- Vanyel *emphasizing* Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2000 %% Monty: I wish life had a grep command. vanyel: scsiha -r /dev/traffic vanyel: clocest I have is a horn. marcie: i wish there was a grep command for my house marcie: with regexps vanyel: yah marcie: so i could find all the shit i've lost vanyel: cat /dev/house |grep "svideo cable" marcie: yeah marcie: exactly Cyrano: naah Cyrano: sort i fail to see the appeal, but whatever works *rayray* i get issued handcuffs and gun, and get to fuck w/ assholes' lives.. what's not to like? -- Rayray planning her career Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2000 %% vanyel: damnit, i think im getting sick marcie: working too much, eh? vanyel: no, taking a walk last night and getting caught int he rain i thin vanyel: i am working strictly a 40 hr day vanyel: err week vanyel: vanyel: i am working strictly a 40 hr day vanyel: im gonna be ripe today, i can feel it vanyel: so soney, how wqas yer weekend marcie: ahahahhahaha marcie: you are DEFINITELY working too hard, man -- Vanyel not getting enough sleep Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2000 %% Monty: y'all are jackasses vanyel: yes vanyel: but we have women Monty: goddamnit -- Monty trying to find a date Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2000 %% Vanyel: damnit, whenever i try and open one of these aptiva computers i feel like im failing an intelligence test -- Vanyel being brilliant Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 April 2000 %% Vanyel: im not paying attention. i just installe dthe japaneese version of softwindows :/ marcie: AHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAAH -- Vanyel being brilliant some more Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 April 2000 %% Monty: and if we're made in his image, why can't I get a date? -- Monty on the existence of God Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 April 2000 %% carrye: my writeable cd rom wont let me have my cd back Vanyel: thats prolly cus youre breaking hte law -- Vanyel warning carrye Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2000 %% vanyel: marcie, i have a bet vanyel: for you vanyel: when james moves here im gettin himliquored up. the bet is, wether get gets more normal, or weirder -- Vanyel running an experiment Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2000 %% Cyrano: build this code into a set-top box and have a connector for an accu-jack on the side Cyrano: and you have 1st-gen automated VR sex vanyel: james vanyel: iy would be cheaper to hire a call girl Cyrano: well yah Cyrano: but think of the geek factor -- Cyrano building the porno of the future Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2000 %% Cyrano: "I AM KORNSHELL HOLIO!!! I NEED T3 FOR MY CISCO!!!! DO YOU HAVE T3?" -- Cyrano being threatened Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2000 %% cuinhell: peanut butter crunch is what god eats for breakfast -- cuinhell on theology Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2000 %% Vanyel: oh, and if this doesnt beat all Vanyel: someone ate all my chocolate Vanyel: thats it Vanyel: noone gets email till someone fesses up to who ate my chocolate -- Vanyel becoming marcie's personal hero Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2000 %% K: oh i just can't make up my mind K: i'll take curtain #2 Monty: you get a night alone with Slayer K: aaaaaah!!!! K: is there a gun behind #3? Monty: no, only orca Monty: take your pick K runs out of the studio -- KapitalK fleeing Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2000 %% Vanyel: OOH! Vanyel: LILO now supports disks up to 2TB! Vanyel: no more 1024 cyl limit! cuinhell: good. i can finally install that 1.5TB drive I have laying around at home -- cuinhell showing off Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 April 2000 %% Cyrano: if you haven't dated a coprophagic infantilist, you don't know what perverted is -- Cyrano being, well, Cyrano Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2000 %% Soney: I wanna wear something that shows my cleavage Al: good idea Cyrano: ok Cyrano: how about socks? Al: HAHAHAHAHAAH -- cyrano being a pervert Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2000 %% miri: why is it so harrd to find a nutritional value guide for bodily fluids? -- miri asking the $6 million question Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2000 %% cuinhell: i need to meet some chicks who are like open relays -- cuinhell setting his standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2000 %% cuinhell: denverite wob: damn right. cuinhell: you people are so hard up for class that you allowed SLAYER to move into your city marcie: HAHAAHHAHAHAHAHHHAAAAHAH -- cuinhell dissing Denver Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2000 %% Lia bangs her head against the wall Lia: just trying to repeat the feeling I get while tutoring math -- Lia feeling the luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2000 %% Al staples soney down *** Soney has been disconnected Al: damn, these are cheap staples -- Al needing office supplies Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2000 %% techs: ooh. is this anAA meeting? I've been meaning to talk to some of those folks.. I need to cultivate a severe drinking problem. -- techs admitting he needs a problem Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2000 %% Slayer: mississippi doesnt need validation Slayer: they made it illegal to walk down the street with an erection techs: mental note.. do not go to mississippi. Al: hahahahahahah Slayer: they didn't pass it until after i left Al: HAAHAHAHAHAHAH Slayer: thank god, i was looking at life imprisonment -- Slayer bragging on his home state Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2000 %% Soney: I had my youth when I was younger -- Soney being profound Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 May 2000 %% K: they love fucking with me K: have since 1994 K: i'll die young cuinhell: stop trying to get us all excited -- K on a venting spree Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 May 2000 %% Soney: my horoscope says I should have an affair today vanyel: according to my horoscope, i should be dead Soney: in Juneau vanyel: so im noty gonna read it anymore -- vanyel predicting the future Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 2000 %% Vanyel: one of the developers is screaming my name and running twords me Vanyel: afk to get flak jacket -- Vanyel protecting himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 May 2000 %% Vanyel: i thought php was a controlled substance untill 20 mins ago -- Vanyel practicing to be a Web developer Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 May 2000 %% K: I'M A QUEER GAY FAGGOT cuinhell: hahaha marcie: YES K: NOW GIVE ME MY OVERPRICED ILLUMINAI JOB marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH marcie: DAMN THAT FAGGOT CONSPIRACY -- the geeks revealing ALL Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 May 2000 %% vanyel: opensource drug movement vanyel: now that would make a good t shirt vanyel: OPENLSD cuinhell: werd -- the greatest minds of the century at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 May 2000 %% brawk: NT has memory leaks. In other news, sun rises. -- brawk giving the news Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2000 %% vanyel: im afraid to take the pepsi challenge vanyel: im afraid that ifi choose coke, sammy sosa will hit a home run with my head vanyel: my head will end up in cube vanyel: and elian gonzales wqill play soccer with it vanyel: cuba even vanyel: so i dont drink pepsi -- vanyel having hallucinations Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 May 2000 %% brawk: Kestrel: not a surprise, I usually have my head up my ass... Kestrel: I like familiar surroundings.... -- Kestrel in his comfort zone Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 May 2000 %% slay: crap slay: i just farted and think it wasn't all gas slay: now i'm scared to move Vanyel: http://www.fakingthefunk.com/queenbitch Vanyel: what the fuck was that Vanyel: thjat came out of my ass but it wasnt from me marcie: ahahahahhahahaha slay: holy shit slay: our simultaneous farts have ripped time and space assudner -- Slayer and Vanyel, the Wonder Twins Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2000 %% Soney: what does it say about me if I have a blind date and suddenly start thinking of buying a gun? -- Soney beginning to lose it Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2000 %% Soney: my breasts make a great stopping point for all manner of foods -- Soney probably being quoted out of context Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2000 %% Sarge waves his fingers in front of dotNuka Sarge: how many fingers am I holding up? DotNuka zones DotNuka: twelve. Sarge: correct Sarge wonders how you know I have twelve fingers Sarge: you worry me DotNuka: it's the third hand, dead giveaway -- Manuka and Sarge Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 June 2000 %% vanyel: for some reason,. white people like poop. -- Vanyel being a little weirdo Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 June 2000 %% Monty: hot wind is great in the morning Monty: cuz you';re like "woah, I wasn't expecting that..." meg: like whoa cuinhell: no monty cuinhell: you are thinking of a blowjob -- Monty getting it mixed up again Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 June 2000 %% linzmovi: what are all your names meg: my name is george marcie: my name is meg Vanyel: my name is SATAN -- Vanyel with his head spinning around Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 June 2000 %% cuinhell: you never have more than one problem with someone you kill cuinhell: unless you count hiding the corpse as a problem, and that's just more of a alack of foresight -- cuinhell being a sysadmin Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2000 %% wob: I AM SUCH A WONDERFUL REPRESENTATIVE FOR THE GAY KINGDOM -- wob finding his place in nature Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2000 %% marcie: okay marcie: i'm going to share this, and then i'll be done marcie: i fucking HATE beingon my period... i'm achy, grumpy and i feel like warmed over shit marcie: okay, i'm done Vanyel: thats what you get for being able to have multiple orgasms -- Vanyel being a sensitive male Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 June 2000 %% Vanyel: via the TCP/IP driver, you could install a cheese sandwich as your network interface, and it would still ping itself -- Vanyel on Solaris routing Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 June 2000 %% cuinhell: if ever there was a day where I'd like to walk into my home and find two teenagers in catholic schoolgirl outfits waiting for me, this is it -- cuinhell having a bad day at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 2000 %% Mistress: i am so out of it today. Just having a day where my brain is working at 1/4 speed Mistress: I just found my palm pilot in the fridge cuinhell: HARHARHARHARHAHRAR Mistress: i have no memory of putting it in there -- the newly appointed Ph.D. losing her mind Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2000 %% cuinhell: take more cum shots to the head! MsDNA: heh I eat way too much protein -- MsDNA and her true confessions Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 2000 %% Vanyel: there ios an O2000 that has my jizz on it marcie: sex in the NOC marcie: AHAHAHAHAHA marcie: tell me you're not lying brawk: NOCin boots Vanyel: i'm not, joy marcie: i will give you a hundred bucks if you're telling the tyruth marcie: AHBAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA marcie: WERD marcie: I LOVE YOU LEO wob: duod you jacked off on an o2k? brawk: show me the spooge wob: damn wob: that puts you into slayers ranks marcie: werd Vanyel: i jus thope I get to do it while still working at kasenna marcie: we must compare notes wob: lies Vanyel: their machine room is extremely sexy Vanyel: wob: there is another o2k coming in next week wob: i want to have sex in exodus Vanyel: i'll take pix of my jizz on it for you marcie: yes marcie: do it wob: or wait wob: mae-east wob: that would be awesome marcie: yes marcie: short out the east coast brawk: sexodus wob: I WANT TO JIZZ ON SPRINT wob: PBTBHBHBTBHBHBHBBTBHBT Lia: remind me never to touch anything in a machine room marcie: with your diamond tipped ewok jizz marcie: rule brawk: hehheh marcie: FUCKING EWOK JIZZ WOB wob: put the ewoks out to graze wob: in the pasture wob: to be milked later for their multiuseful jizz brawk: You've pasture prime. marcie: yes wob: hair jel marcie: multifunction jizz marcie: MOOOOO wob: motor oil wob: ky jelly brawk: jizzabel marcie: ahahahaha marcie: motor oil wob: ALL NATURAL brawk: homotor oil wob: SAFE TO THE ENVIRONMENT Vanyel: the leatherman of jizz marcie: ahahahah Vanyel: david leatherman Vanyel: damnit Vanyel: brawk, go sit in the corner marcie: buy it by the quart! Vanyel: you got me doing it, too wob: actaully i bet ewok jizz is the leading contributor to global warming brawk: ewoks with me & etawks with me wob: heh cuinhell: jizz. Vanyel: see, you havta bleed on suns to get them to work Vanyel: you hafta jizz on sgi boxen to get them to work brawk: eWoks.com marcie: but for O2000's marcie: jizz marcie: works every time Vanyel: exactly marcie: that's why i quit lockheed marcie: i couldn't jizz on the SGI hardware Vanyel: not enough jizz? marcie: IT DIDN"T WORK FOR ME Vanyel: too bad wob: YOU DIDNT USE ENUFF LUBE marcie: yes. marcie: i think so marcie: i mean brawk: lubricious marcie: there i was wob: afk marcie: humping the corner of the rack and everything Vanyel: i was workiong on solaris boxen all day marcie: but no Vanyel: and i looked longingly at the SGI's... marcie: not enuf jizz Vanyel: theey were jealous Vanyel: they are being neglected, and they know it marcie: well leo marcie: you just need to go over marcie: plug yourself into their SCSI marcie: and fsck away brawk: love tap marcie: AHR HAR Vanyel: fuck that Vanyel: fiber channel; Beastie: hahahaah marcie: harharhahrhar Vanyel: i got multimode fiber between my legs, baybee marcie: aw jeah Vanyel: RX AND TX! brawk: single mode is more refined Vanyel: i'm not that refined, brawk Vanyel: *wink* marcie: you got that damn right -- you people are SICK. Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2000 %% vanyel: not to put down what you are going through, but i guess im saying, dude, theres nothing wrong with you vanyel: if WOB can get a chick vanyel: if I can get chicks wob: YEAH vanyel: if JOY can get chicks wob: AND IF MARCIE CAN GET A CHICK marcie: if slay can get a chick wob: ;) wob: hahahahah vanyel: youcertanly can marcie: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA cuinhell: SLAY can get a chick wob: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA Monty: yeah, I just don't feel like i'm dealing with it as well as I can wob: rofl vanyel: ahahha -- Monty having issues with hooking up Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2000 %% MsDNA: CUDDKLy Butt! MsDNA: I am not drink -- Jana tells a lie Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2000 %% vanyel: mention slayus microscopic dick, and look who shows up linzee: HELLO! -- Linzee making an appearance Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2000 %% wob: i need the burrito of regularity. -- wob having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 July 2000 %% Moni: BEND OVER BANANA MAN -- Moni, on shopping while stoned Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 July 2000 %% vanyel: how can i find out what perl modules are installed/ dweez: lick it good & hard -- dweez on code or toads, not sure which Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 2000 %% Vanyel: bah Vanyel: iam about th throw my boss thru a window Soney: dont' do it unless it's a high window Vanyel: too bad i dont have acces ot the second story Soney: is second story really enough tho? Soney: you want him out for a good long while Vanyel: well, teh combination of trauma from breaking thye glass, and hitting the pavement, maybe a car, would do it I think Vanyel: maybe I should go move my car first -- vanyel loving his job Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 July 2000 %% Vanyel: they make strap on ducks for lesbians -- Vanyel perpetuating a nasty rumor Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 July 2000 %% Vanyel: I AM THE LEADING CAUSE OF LESBIANISM INAMERICA! -- Vanyel proclaiming his gay pride Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 July 2000 %% K: and i'm not closed minded -- K tells a lie Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2000 %% Mistress: i've been trapped in my sports bra Mistress: it's frightening -- Mistress being traumatized Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2000 %% Moni: hey..yesterday..in a despirate attempt to lure leo out to do something fun..I wore a backless sundress that showed a little butt cleavage roo: straight liquid litamin E cuinhell: kick me? fuck you. Moni: told him about it Marianne: did it work? marcie: uuurrrrggghhhh Moni: no marcie: dammit moni Soney: it didn't work? marcie: you are trying to kill me marcie: GAY marcie: GAYGAYGAY marcie: HE IS GAY marcie: GAYLEO marcie: bah. Moni: didn't work at all.. marcie: afk to wank. -- Mistress being cruel Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2000 %% Caroline: my work keyboard has all this food and crap in it and im leavin in a few weeks....someone else is inheriting my disgusting mess Caroline: its little things like that that make life worthwhile -- Caroline stopping to smell the roses Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2000 %% Mistress: Most women don't have chest pain or arm pain when having a heartattack cuinhell: most women don't really have hearts -- cuinhell, but he's not bitter Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 July 2000 %% Sarge: I want that laser eye surgery done..my glasses are pissing me off today cuinhell: they have to surgically remove your head from your ass first, otherwise they might ignite your intestinal gasses cuinhell: ;) Sarge: thanks cu, I'll keep that in mind -- cuinhell sharing the luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 August 2000 %% Sarge: Ok outlook is pissing me off Lia: that's a feature Lia: the ability to piss you off very quickly -- Lia being helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 August 2000 %% Kestrel: I think if I could lick my balls it would change my farting habits -- ewwwww. Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 August 2000 %% cuinhell: i am slightly disturbed. i just took a piss and found a long blonde hair clinging to capt winky. *** DKlunch is now known as DKwork DKwork: cu, that had better not be one of my hairs. cuinhell: damn right it better not be cuinhell: and next time you'd better do a better job cleaning up you little bitch -- cuinhell and DK having a spat Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 August 2000 %% wob: texas sucks. its fuckingdirty, ugly, smelly, and worst of all, full of texans. -- wob pointing out the flaws Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 August 2000 %% wob: FECES PAINTING ed: ick ed: though Beastie: and the colors could change Beastie: dependong on your food wob: yes ed: thats not unlike feces body painting wob: "i need some green, must eat more broccoli" Beastie: at christmas you get beets and collard gr4eens ed: hmm ed: intereting concept wob: "i need some texture to my next masterpiece, time for some peanuts" ed: sounds like an Ebusiness concept to me. Beastie: corn niblets wob: yes ed: lets market it wob: Shitty Art ed: beauty is ed: its nearly free to produce Beastie: yah ed: you've got cut up grocery sacks for canvas ed: and Beastie: just pick up a big ole turd like a crayon ed: whatever fuel I can lay my hands on that day for materials Beastie: and go to town wob: hahahaha ed: I prefer runny paints wob: a turd crayon ed: crayon turd ed: hmm ed: just drop the drawers and spray ed: ok ed: must eat. wob: you could wrap it in brown grovery bag paper and make a crayola label for it wob: "Shit" is the color Beastie: hahahah Beastie: yes Beastie: shit brown Beastie: heh wob: hehehe Moni: ya know..it's conversations like these that really make me wonder just why I still visit here wob: that would be awesome DontKnow: dark shit, light shit, greenish shit, Beastie: now there is a marketscheme wob: HAHAHAHA marcie: ahahahahahahhaaha!! wob: Shitola crayons marcie: oh man marcie: you people are sick marcie: sickSickSCIK marcie: and SIC, too marcie: SICK\ marcie: aSDFJalsdfjlkasdfjladjflaksjasdf marcie: the shit has gone to my brain. Beastie: SIC wob: "yes i'd like a box of Shitola crayons" Beastie: this Beastie: hold on a sec Beastie: lemme take my metamucil wob: hahah wob: i had the burrito of regularity today wob: i should have a shitola crayon on the way marcie: woowoo -- the inmates being SCIK Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 August 2000 %% marcie: ow marcie: ow ow ow marcie: fuck marcie: there has to be a better way to put up pictures than thumbtacks marcie: my fingers are numb Marianne: back to my meeting. *** Marianne has left the room cuinhell: marcie: nailgun. cuinhell: wait marcie: bwahahahhahahaa cuinhell: i misread that as "torture lusers" marcie: i nub j00 cuin -- cuinhell and marcie sharing a special moment Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 August 2000 %% cuinhell: however, I am slacking this afternoon. i have to be at the change control meeting. i can either walk across the street to it or call into the conference. guess which I'm picking? marcie: :) vanyel: call in from the shitter marcie: bwahahah cuinhell: hehe, nah, need my speaker phone and mute button marcie: that's how i'm going to do my next phone interview marcie: AHRHARHarHARHAHRHArHarharharharhar cuinhell: "What do you think you'd bring to our company?" *POOOOOOTTTTTTTTDRIBBLESPLASH* vanyel: thats about all I have to offer atthe moment vanyel: *FLUSHHHHHHHH* cuinhell: hahaha marcie: harhahrarhra -- a moment of inspiration Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 August 2000 %% vanyel: james would hook up a duck, three christmas tree lights, and a car battery and get 3 phase from a duracell battery -- vanyel in awe Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 August 2000 %% dweez: my idea of a disk drive is snails runnign around on a plate of lime jello wob: HAHAHAHAHAH Vanyel: ooh brawk: oozing wob: what do you mean, that's the IDE spec dweez: :) dweez: HARHHRHRHAHH marcie: h0h0h0h0 -- wob and dweez being SCSI snobs Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 August 2000 %% wob: IM THE BEST PERSON WITH RETARDATION -- wob being smart Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 August 2000 %% vanyel: MY ASS IS EXOTHERMIC -- Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 September 2000 %% Beastie: i made an a in my hs typing class Beastie: it pbviously wasn't very strictly scored -- Beastie as a good student Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 September 2000 %% wob: SATAN...SATAN...SATAN -- wob calling his daddy Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 September 2000 %% Vanyel: i once printed porn in a burger king bathroom -- we really don't want to know Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 September 2000 %% Vanyel: only in california would they spend $10 million to rename a fruit Manuka: hey, it worked for prince -- Manuka being a funny funny boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2000 %% Cyrano: stuck in L.A. with the fucking FLU marcie: i have been working too hard marcie: i saw "FLU" as an acronym marcie: and was trying to remember what it stands for marcie: i need recovery Soney: AHAHAHAAHAHA Cyrano: yah marcie, the Female Librarians Union marcie: oh sure, laught it off marcie: WAIT TIL IT HAPPENS TO YOU -- marcie twitching Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 September 2000 %% MsDNA: I'm going to suck you dry soney :) -- werd. up. Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 September 2000 %% K: i checked myself out in the mirror and i noticed something K: (naked) Vanyel: you have a vagina? -- Vanyel calling K a pussy Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 September 2000 %% Al just learned something creative to do with these cablemodems *** MsDNA has entered room 'Main' Al: hey jana MsDNA: hey Al Al: I just found someone coming in through my cablemodem Al: so I rewrote their autoexec.bat MsDNA: hahaha Al: I uploaded them a copy of reboot.exe and made this their autoexec Al: @echo off Al: CLS Al: echo YOU SHOULD NOT TRY TO HACK PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET! Al: pause Al: \reboot MsDNA: hahaha MsDNA: great marcie: ahahahahaha -- Al being an evil haxx0r Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2000 %% vanyel: asian chicks rule Manuka: van: WERD. vanyel: just ask marcie DontKnow: yeah leo. vanyel: there are SO MANY out here vanyel: oh god vanyel: and they all have vanyel: nice long silky sexy as hel hair vanyel: oh man vanyel: afk -- Vanyel having needs Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2000 %% Monty: *patterpatterpatterSPROINGfloomfloomfloomTHUD* -- Monty describing the Australian womens' gymnastics team falling off the vault Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2000 %% IndyJ: tit-less midgets vanyel: ok, im awake now -- oh dear. Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2000 %% brawk: I thought of one on the way in to work today: brawk: "Don't talk to drugs." Lia: ok... wob: why not? i talk to mine brawk: I mean, you shouldn't be saying "No," "Yes," or anything else to drugs. wob: YOU SHOULD BE DOING DRUGS wob: DO DO DO DO brawk: They're inanimate--people will think you're crazy. wob: doodoo. vanyel: brawk, that was bad, even for you brawk: Chuck you, I'm gonna make it into a bumper sticker -- brawk having a brilliant moment Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 September 2000 %% Lia: Vegetarians: You people SUCK! - the plants Lia: :> Lia: different perspective Courtney: my fave is the "bd cop! no donut!" one Lia: heh brawk: But see, plants aren't sentient, so they couldn't formulate that message. Lia: how do you know? brawk: (he said, too seriously) Lia: hehehe brawk: No brains. Lia: so wob: www.unamerican.com wob: now they have good bumper stickers. Lia: plenty of ppl have no brains, and they're considered sentient -- Lia makes a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 September 2000 %% Zorro: hey van. those budwieser chicks are almost definaatly hooking up with me. Kestrel spits coffe across the cube -- Kestrel, a non-believer Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 2000 %% brawk: I WANT TO BE QUOTED -- there ya go, brawkly Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 September 2000 %% Monty: but I know for a fact Al has exactly what I need -- hot boy-boy action on EN! Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 2000 %% Vanyel: what happined to pouting and crying and listening to morrisy? Vanyel: isnt that what normal humans do when they get dumped? Moni: she's been doing that too Soney: morrisey turns me on too much to get depressed listening to him Vanyel: ahahah -- Soney's musical tastes revealed Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 2000 %% Vanyel: its bad juju to go after people you work with Monty: I do'nt work with you -- Vanyel and Monty being cute Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2000 %% Monty: yes, i'm attractive to smelly, fat, alcoholic redneck pedophiles -- the trend continues! Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2000 %% Vanyel: and on teh ninth day Vanyel: god farted Vanyel: and smog covered the universe for 40 days and 40 nights AQUAMAN: and it was...umm..not so good. Vanyel: grin -- Vanyel farted, huh huh huhhh Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 September 2000 %% Lia: draw a cis-1,3-dichlorocyclohexane Lia: fun Lia: and a (S)-trans-1,3-dibromohexene vanyel: lia vanyel: if you keep that up vanyel: i'll get erect Lia: and a trans-1,3-dimethylcyclopentane vanyel: *boiiing* -- Vanyel being a nerd Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 2000 %% Monty: my philosophy is more than a handful is just a waste K: MONTY cuinhell: that's like saying a porsche is not slow K: i guess you'll never waste your nuts linzee: oh my god Al: yes? linzee hits the floor linzee: ahahahah cuinhell: monty, you need more research, your findings are flawed K laughs Monty: I've got big hands, motherfucker -- Monty, doh! Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2000 %% Slayer: oops i did it again Slayer: i played with my clit -- Slayer singing pop music to himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 October 2000 %% Vanyel: if my scrotum was running win95, i would never have to worry about kids cuinhell: bwahaha, or erections marcie: ahahahahaha Monty: "why is there a start button on your penis?" cuinhell: press it and find out *** Lia-AFK is now known as Lia Vanyel: where do YOU want to go today? Vanyel: *wink wink* marcie: AHAHAHAHAHAAH Lia: do I want to know? Vanyel: press the start button and find out, lia MsDNA: hehehe cuinhell: GAHAH MsDNA: wooot Lia: um Vanyel: START ME UP Lia: hehehe MsDNA: I can only imagine the tech support cuinhell: doc, ya gotta help me, my penis gp faulted! Vanyel: AHHAHAHAHA Lia: *LOL* Vanyel: just reboot it MsDNA: Press start, go to settings, the cumtrol panel Vanyel gets out teh nutcracker Vanyel: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Vanyel: ahahahahahah marcie: harhrahharhararhar Vanyel: HAHAHAHAhahahahAhaH Vanyel: oh christ Vanyel: im in a better mood now Lia: good marcie: yeah MsDNA: I can imagine trying to get the taskbar moved marcie: be glad your tww is nawt running win95 marcie: it could be considered an STD Vanyel: my tww is running penix cuinhell: "my cursor is jumping" marcie: YES Vanyel: penix (6.6.6) MsDNA: click and drag, no not like that, try again, and again... cuinhell: take the balls out and clean them sir Vanyel: hahahahahah -- that is just NOT RIGHT. Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2000 %% Slayer: every time martha stewart says 'bok choy' i just want to slap her across the face with a maglight -- our beloved Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2000 %% Slayer: his stomach gets upset at him because he is an inferior example of homo sapien sapien and should have been plucked from the tree of life long ago Soney: ouch Vanyel: slay Slayer: and a good morning to you all marcie: that's our slay Vanyel: jsut because theres more of you than the average homo sapiens sapiens doesnt mean youre superiour -- Vanyel getting off a zinger Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 2000 %% cuinhell: culkin couldn't act like he was dying if someone shot him in the head -- cuinhell on MacCauley Culkin Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 October 2000 %% MsDNA: I shall use my nipples to take over the world -- the plot thickens Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2000 %% Monty: this rules. I have a hockey goal light in my room. vanyel: not like you'll ever score in there -- Monty getting dissed Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2000 %% Monty changes into shorts CUZ I"M A MANAGER AND I"M COOL LIKE THAT Slayer: they have managers at Fisher Prices My First Job? -- Monty getting dissed, part 2 Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 October 2000 %% wob: your asshole is gonna thank you later Vanyel: slay would never thank me -- Vanyel and wob on eating Indian food Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 October 2000 %% Paris: ignorance is bliss Kestrel: only for the ignorant, it really pisses the rest of us off Lia: good point -- Kesticle speaks words of wisdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 October 2000 %% Monty: you whore. marcie: yes. marcie: but at least i get laid. -- Monty, who never learns Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2000 %% marcie: I AM FUCKING BORED cuinhell: werd. cuinhell: i am too. c: why? marcie: because marcie: there is nothing to do. cuinhell: a week off is too much c: like many other problems in the world, this can be solved through mutual masturbation -- Paris with a good idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2000 %% Soney: my computer is not going to take manymore toys in it before it dies for good Soney: as it is, if I want to run the CD Burner, I have to shut everything else down or it'll crash cuinhell: soney: disconnect the SCSI vobrator cuinhell: vibrator Soney: cu, that would take ALL the pleasure I get out of this job -- Soney *bzzzzz* Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2000 %% MsDNA: I'll set up a stand on the corner MsDNA: Free Breast Exams MsDNA: I'll undercut that dirty bum who is doin em for $1.00 Vanyel: i'll pay to give them Vanyel: beat THAT marcie: h0h0h0 MsDNA: ahahaha Vanyel: hrm, that might be a tumor. my tongue can tell for sure -- Vanyel being a dirty old man Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2000 %% marcie: i couldn't get off in time, so we came in halfway through -- it's not what you think, sickos Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 October 2000 %% vanyel: i got a monster cable in my pants MsDNA: wooohoo -- MsDNA, enjoying the last few weeks before getting hitched Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2000 %% Vanyel: I love introducing people to BOFH marcie: convert them all Vanyel: seeing their innocent, little minds suddenly get warped Vanyel: seeing, for teh first time, the evil grin Vanyel: i imagine thats what being a parent must be like -- Vanyel as a proud daddy Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 October 2000 %% Vanyel: due to a rare genetic disorder, i really DO have salad tongs in my panties -- Vanyel being weird Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 October 2000 %% Vanyel: you know Vanyel: actually, i forgot Vanyel: nevermind -- Vanyel imparting wisdom... we think Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 October 2000 %% marcie: cynthia's machine has been going apeshit for a week marcie: in the middle of the strenuous task of doing NOTHING, it'll blue-screen. cuinhell: it's a lot of work to do nothing marcie: i am amazed by win95's ability to suck so much. cuinhell: i mean, it's not like you can stop doing nothing cuinhell: it just goes on adn on and on -- cuinhell, tech support genius Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 October 2000 %% linzee: no one loves me but old strange men linzee: slayer is a good example -- linzee, the loved Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 October 2000 %% Vanyel: goddamnit Vanyel: why does shit always break around here whern i get horny Vanyel: afk -- vanyel, the horny Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 2000 %% meg: in canada if you want to go home drunk you must go by dogsled -- Meg, on DUIs being a felony in Canada Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 2000 %% DKgone: anyways i'm gonna go. have fun discussing politics. DKgone: if any of you decide to miss me, just shoot yourself. Lia: I guess I'm safe then rockjock: lots of safe people in here then ;) Lia 5's rockjock marcie: ahahahhaha DKgone: rj, yes, knowing this place, everybody is safe. myself included. rockjock: :) DKgone: :) Lia: I used to miss you, but then my aim got better rockjock: don't worry, dk, I don't miss very often...except on doves, squirrley little things rockjock: ok, lia, stop that, you're scaring me... rockjock: :) Lia: HAHAHAHAHA Lia: get out my head rj -- Lia and RJ, soulmates Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 November 2000 %% wob: rj might know wob: he's an MS weenie marcie: he's a republican too marcie: coincidence?\ marcie: I THINK NOT wob: hahahaha Lia: HAHAHAHAHA -- Quasar seeking help on Visual Basic Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2000 %% Vanyel: yer too cute of a woman Vanyel: youd be a very effiminatele looking man Soney: too feminine? Soney: bleh Vanyel: you;d probably end up getting gay gius hitting on to Vanyel: hitting on you Soney: then they'd see my breasts and take off running Vanyel: thats why you use ace bandages instead of duct tape Vanyel: *clip* *brooOOOING* Vanyel: TAKE THAT! Vanyel: *AUGH!* marcie: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA Soney: I don't think that's even going to hold them down Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA marcie: oh holy shit that's funny marcie: damnit leo Slayer: i'll hold them marcie: STOP MAKING ME LAFF -- Soney's a man, bay-bee! Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2000 %% Soney: is semen kosher? -- Soney making dietary plans Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2000 %% Manuka: goddammit Vanyel: yeah Manuka: jim carrey gets 20 million bucks a picture to act like I do. Manuka: where did I go wrong? Vanyel: solaris. Manuka: ah. -- Vanyel cluing Manuka in Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2000 %% Soney: yes Soney: 27 and unmarried Soney: with no plans to get married Soney: if I want kids, I think I'll just hit up a friend and have him come over for a while til I get preggo Soney: provided I'm financially stable, of course Slayer: i'll impregnate you Slayer: i don't mind Paris: darwinism is clearly a lie :p -- Paris lamenting Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 November 2000 %% brawk: I vud like a dopple-tall latte homo mit eggstra froth. Paris: hehehe *** Sarge has been disconnected brawk: Hmmm must be homophobic -- brawk, the funny boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 November 2000 %% meg: a pgv meg: gah meg: i fant' aytpe AQUAMAN: Wookin' pa' nub meg: i suck meg: sober as a wall and i can't type Monty: meggie's drunk! bwhaha. Monty: oh damn. Monty: debunk that theory. Monty: maybe wob's giving her head. h0 h0 h0 AQUAMAN raises an eyebrow meg: if he can do that from work i'll make a bronze statue of him linzee: ahahahah -- meg admiring her hubby Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 November 2000 %% Vanyel: i could use a good fucking, too marcie fucks leo GOOD and HARD Vanyel: yeah. Vanyel: YEAH marcie: *THRUSTTHRUSTTHRUSTTHRUSTTHRUST* Vanyel: uhh Vanyel: wait marcie: O:) Vanyel: you wouldnt need a strapon marcie: SURE I WOULD Vanyel: never mind then. marcie: damn. marcie: oh all RIGHT marcie: kneel. -- marcie and leo loving on each other Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 November 2000 %% Vanyel: she shouyld be enraptured at thesight of your genetailia Vanyel: like in pornos brawk: harharhrhahr sunbeam: hahaha Vanyel: she should get that deer-in-the-headlights look marcie: ahahahahahhahahhahahahahaa sunbeam: ahahaha sunbeam: stop it yo're killing me Vanyel: ;) Kestrel: you mean a contemptuous sneer isn't normal? Vanyel: no Kestrel: damn! -- the guys, on begging for sex Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 2000 %% sunbeam: ok you fuckers i fixed my washer *** Cerberus has left the room Vanyel: cool Vanyel: youre welcome, for the help sunbeam: i named the funk i found clogging the mech. after you marcie: ahahahahaa Vanyel: cool -- sunbeam playing mechanic Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 2000 %% Moni: Today is the 1st day of Ramadan Vanyel: muslim Moni: watch out for hungry, angry Musulms -- Moni with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 November 2000 %% wob: i spent my college days well. wob: i learned how to build a bong outa a honey bear -- wob endorsing higher education Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2000 %% Slayer: i just want a wife who'll fuck animals -- Slayer, who doesn't ask for much, really Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2000 %% MsDNA: oh lord MsDNA: Someone has the runs and left skid marks in the toilet Sarge: haha MsDNA: bah Sarge: yuck MsDNA: I hate that MsDNA: yeh MsDNA: Now I gotta wonder WHO is was? *** wob has left the room brawk: No, you do not. marcafk: HAHAHAHAHAAHAAHHA -- wob, the accused Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 December 2000 %% marcie: god, even the mailer daemon from AOL talks down to you -- marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2000 %% rockjock: why would you PUT an nfs server on NT?????? rockjock: are you testing how random unavailability of files affects something? -- rockjock the MS weenie Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2000 %% Vanyel: its been like 2 weeks Vanyel: i'm ready to get laid again Vanyel: i WILL be bringing my camera marcie: cool marcie: it's been marcie: um marcie: 2 days marcie: O:) Vanyel: shut up. marcie: i'm ready to get laid again marcie: ahahahah marcie: NO Moni: shut up Vanyel: SHUT UP Moni: it's been..umm..I've lost count. Vanyel: i hate you all. Moni: three weeks? But, I've been turning people down. Which is rather fun. Kestrel: it's been...um... 4 hours? marcie: bitch. -- Kestrel winning the contest Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 December 2000 %% marcie: isis:/export/home42/laji/Mail -># compress laji_inbox.tar laji_sentmail.tar marcie: compress compress compress DKwork: gzip -9, not compress. Or bzip2 -9 :) marcie: shhh marcie: no gzip on this server Cyrano: -9 is such a waste of cpu though Kes: james you freak of nature Kes: be my one and only Cyrano: and gzip still gets constipated on 2gb+ files occasionally Cyrano: aheh Kes: think of the tragic children we would have marcie: ahahahaha Kes: ultra-geeks, limited social skills, handsome beyond words marcie: i love you guys. -- Cyrano and Kes being all sweet on each other Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 December 2000 %% linzee: my sister is the popular girl that creates columbine kids -- linzee on sibling rivalry Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2001 %% Cyrano: if sex is like networking Cyrano: does that make women multiport repeaters? Cyrano: maybe BGP5 will include routing support for orgies wob: james you sick fuck -- Cyrano, the sick fuck Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2001 %% Cyrano: I'm just obsessed with sex, computers and mechanics Cyrano: nothing unusual about that -- LIES! Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2001 %% marcie: YOU REDNECK FUCK SlayMS: i can't read -- Slayer the redneck lives Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2001 %% rockjock: let us bow our heads and pray for the strength to survive another week without killing anybody...at least anybody important -- rockjock praying Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 2001 %% Soney: i wish i was brave enough to go without panties at work -- yeah! Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 2001 %% MsDNA: the counter tops are sticky with god knows WHAT -- the newlywed speaks Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 2001 %% ed: something about flour, a fat chick and a web-browser brings the best out in me. -- ed, our hero Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 January 2001 %% Cyrano: Fat-free communion wafers: "I can't believe it's not Jesus!" -- Cyrano being phunny Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 January 2001 %% Vanyel: jesus christ, it sounds like carrye and an elephant are having sex upstairs -- Vanyel being cruel Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2001 %% ed_wk: thats what IT is all about ed_wk: using the wrong tool for the wrong job and causing pain along the way -- ed the BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2001 %% wob: microsoft, dell, and unisys are teaming up to produce a new voting system wob: shit i trust fucking florida voters more than i trust fucking microsoft wob: you know they're gonna fuck it up Slayer: we'll know it was rigged when bill gates is our next president -- wob and slayer predicting the apocalypse Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2001 %% LUNCHyel: UP DOWN UP DOWN LEFT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT SPURT SQUIRT AAAH! -- Vanyel enjoying himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2001 %% sunbeam: i need a sugar daddy sunbeam: so i don't ever have to work *** Al has entered room 'Main' sunbeam: al i'm accepting applications for a sugar daddy Al: ok Al: what's the salary? Monty: it's not the money Monty: it's the benefits Al: which are...? sunbeam: me, all me sunbeam: you get me Al: hrm. -- Al considering an offer Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2001 %% Slayer: i fucked a jar of mayonaise just yesterday -- Slayer defending his sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2001 %% marcie: dear jesus, marcie: please do not let these people breed. marcie: love, joy Slayer: dear joy, Slayer: i do not exist. your message has been forwarded to MSN. Slayer: love, god. -- Slayer, the theologian Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2001 %% wob: gay Slayer: i know you are, what am i Sarge: are you coming out wob? wob: do you want me to? -- wob the h0m0 Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2001 %% AQUAMAN: yufkghfkgf] AQUAMAN: i've been dropped into a windows for dummies pseudoreality AQUAMAN: i think this is hell -- Aquaman, tortured Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 January 2001 %% Vanyel: iwanna find a woman that lactates guiness -- Vanyel on his ideal woman Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 January 2001 %% ed: I heard like 3 times on different shows and maybe in a book, the expression "I'd like to wear her ass as a hat" ed: more like: "Damn..I'd like to wear her ass as a hat." ed: I'm not sure I understand ed: if you're in the muff that hard, you've gone too far Vanyel: hehehe ed: and you better have tied the 2x4 to your leg, she's suckig you in Vanyel: ed ed: that slurp slurp sound isn't you toungwashing her peehole Vanyel: what the hell do you smoke ed: thats the sound of the venus vagina trap -- ed on a roll Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 January 2001 %% Soney: i'll grow a penis Soney: oh wait Sarge 'd pay to see that! Soney: that means I lose use of my brain -- Soney's NOT a man, baybee Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2001 %% Slayer: i wish i weren't so considerate of other people's feelings sometimes -- Slay tells a lie Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2001 %% K: Administration corrupts. Kestrel: yes Kestrel: and su corrupts absolutely -- Kestrel speaks Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2001 %% K: "aaaahhhh!!!!" *goes into shock* K: i need a damn brillo pad to get this scab off Kestrel: let me help Kestrel drags out the belt sander -- Kestrel being helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2001 %% Slayer: i fucking hate karaoke with all the blackness of my heart wob: shutup and sing -- wob commanding slay to have a good time Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2001 %% Cyrano: off to fantasize about inconol faced chromed stellite sodium filled valves Vanyel: i'm just gonna think about chicks Vanyel: i hope thats okay -- Cyrano trying to corrupt the children Eagle's nest BBS, 21 January 2001 %% SoneyAFK: I will wank when I get home SoneyAFK: oh yes. i will. querk: woo Jake: ummm how? marcie: werd. Jake: I don't get it *** Cyrano has entered room 'Main' querk: jake. shuddap SoneyAFK teaches Jake about toys querk: wob--explain things to your little shadow Jake: oooh I love it when you talk dirty marcie: WERD!@#! querk: i need to order a little toy SoneyAFK: that short one is like yours, see? SoneyAFK: that longer one there is the REAL DEAL marcie: ahahahahahahahahhahahahahaahahaha Jake: hey! -- Soney educating the young'un Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 January 2001 %% Soney: i think my left breast must be growing -- Soney having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 January 2001 %% Vanyel: holy shit Vanyel: we just elected dan quayle with a facelift -- Vanyel on the esteemed George W Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2001 %% Slayer: it's illegal to mail dead animals, right? -- Slayer plotting revenge Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 January 2001 %% Monty: you'd fuck me if I had tits wob: slay has tits wob: she wont fuck him -- wob makes a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2001 %% Kesticle: I had a mental image of marcie wielding the Anal Invader of Death Vanyel: so did my anus Vanyel: i have to go poop now -- Vanyel being scared shitless (har!) Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 2001 %% Sarge: with my luck my wife would flash her tits, someone with a video camera would tape it and then i'd have to call 1-800-flash-tits and pay 49.99$ to buy a video of it just so I can see them whe Sarge: when I want to -- Sarge on Mardi Gras Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2001 %% wob: werd wob: i made it into work in time for lunch Kestrel: bahahaha wob: gotta have priorities! marcafk: you are such a role model for us all *** marcafk is now known as marcie Kestrel boggles wob: thank you wob: i try to lead by example. -- wob, our hero Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 February 2001 %% Vanyel: *bang bang BANG BANG BANG CRASH* Moni: TUD Moni: "oo..did I get it in?" -- Moni talking about fat people having sex Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 February 2001 %% cuinhell: i don't have pet peeves, I have major fucking psychotic hatreds -- cuinhell the sane Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2001 %% marcie: D 242 Feb 15 rjiovhy@mantramail (1,246) Add inches to your Penis GAURANTEED! marcie: just what i need Manuka: wewt -- Manuka getting all excited Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 February 2001 %% ed: I came home early to jackoff and now I can't get the fucking cat off my lap -- ed in a dilemma Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 February 2001 %% cuinhell: isn't that in the bible somewhere? cuinhell: Lo, thee fat fucks shall not lay down with the ferretts and other small furry creatures of mine making." Vanyel: AHAHAHAHAHHA marcie: bwahahahahahah -- cuinhell on why Princess shouldn't own pets Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2001 %% marcie: i'd give van a blowjob if i didn't hate sucking cock marcie: O:) *** K has been disconnected Vanyel: youd choke on my anyay marcie: bwahahahahaha marcie: marcie: i'd give van a blowjob if i didn't hate sucking cock marcie: marcie: O:) marcie: *** K has been disconnected Vanyel: ahahAHaHahHaHahaHAH cuinhell: *chortle* Vanyel: K was jealouys marcie: yes Soney: gahahaha marcie: yes he was Vanyel: poor boy marcie: HE wanted to suck your cock cuinhell: HAHHAA *** Dr_Moni has entered room 'Main' Dr_Moni: boop Vanyel: i'll let him suck on a potato Vanyel: MONI! marcie: and speaking of blowjobs Dr_Moni preens Soney: monimoni Dr_Moni: i came just in time Dr_Moni: hey Leo Vanyel: AHAHHAHA marcie: so as to speak -- you are all perverts. Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 February 2001 %% Vanyel: the workplace is no place for crying bratty children Dr_Moni laughs marcie: yes. Vanyel: we have plenty of crying braty adults here marcie: ahahahahahah Vanyel: the kids shold set a better example. -- Vanyel's workplace Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 February 2001 %% Vanyel: I was at frys when it hit, i thought i was just woozy -- Vanyel on an earthquake Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2001 %% *** Jake has left the room: *plop* Kestrel: jake left a klingon behind marcafk: his shit has no honor K: oink cuinhell: hahah marcafk: if he were any other shitter, i would kill him where he stands *** marcafk is now known as marcie cuinhell: gahahaha -- marcie the Trek geek Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2001 %% Moni: i had a salad bar for lunch Moni: i ate the entire salad bar -- Moni during PMS Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2001 %% Slayer: id' have sex with a lot of pepole that i dont think are all that attractive -- and he's still not getting laid Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2001 %% ed_wk: I think my PHB damaged his point over the weekend. -- Ed, on his pointy-haired boss Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2001 %% cuinhell: dweez, you ignorant slut dweez: cu dweez: i love you man cuinhell: if you loved me you would use more lube -- dweez and cu feelin' the luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2001 %% taco: hey, were yall visited by little girls at your doorstep lately? cuinhell: yes. cuinhell: and a few days later the police. -- cuinhell the perv Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 March 2001 %% Cyrano: it's like salmon returning to its birthplace Cyrano: but without the spawning opportunities -- Cyrano on Usenix Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 March 2001 %% wob: MY MOMMY GAVE BIRTH TO ME THRU HER VAGINAL CANAL wob: the word "mommy" and "vaginal" should be illegal to use in the same sentence Vanyel: i was just about to say that -- sick fucks. Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 March 2001 %% cuinhell: christ was made of spun sugar Slayer: spun sugar is the national food of heaven cuinhell: you won't find THAT in the bible -- sugar high! Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2001 %% Vanyel: my fucking upstairs neighbors are blasting rap Vanyel: so i'm blasting cyndi lauper Slayer: as racial tension continues in fremont -- live from the front Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 April 2001 %% ChinaCat: revenge is a dish best served with chorus girls and a 78-piece orchestra -- ChinaCat adapting Klingon proverbs Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 April 2001 %% Slayer: why do my armpits smell like coffee beans -- Slayer pondering the $6mil question Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2001 %% Soney: i need eye drops cuinhell: ok, lemme whip you up a batch cuinhell: *wankwankwankwankwank* -- cuinhell, the perfect gentleman Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2001 %% Cyrano: nothing beats the bandwidth of a station wagon filled with magtapes -- Cyrano quoting an unknown source Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 May 2001 %% Sarge: I can't get the web to work DKwork: "can't get the web to work" and we wonder why help desk people go insane.. -- DK the techie Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 May 2001 %% Kestrel is a english chick Vanyel: afk to go drool over english chick at lunch -- aww, how cute Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2001 %% Kestrel: may your bunghole spontaneously ignite Kestrel: hmm.... you'd have a .... flaming asshole Kestrel: you could be MY BOSS! -- Kesticle being a funny boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2001 %% wob: you have friends? Soney: AHAHAHAHA Sarge: well they are plastic and blow up, but yeah wob: well those count Sarge: ok Sarge: then yes cuinhell: they FUCK you at the drive through Sarge: my friends? or the drive through people? wob: both Sarge: well shit Sarge: I need to move and find better drive throughs then Sarge: all I get here is cold fries cuinhell: had to put brads double cheeseburger under a microscope to find any meat on it cuinhell: kinda like sarge's crotch wob: knew that was coming cuinhell: i tried to resist Sarge: yeah well what can I say, it's small but does it's biological function cuinhell: like many other virii Sarge: yep -- Sarge being cute Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 May 2001 %% Sarge: bend over jake Jake bends over Sarge: good little bitch boy Jake: man this has been a bad day... -- Jake having a bad day Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 May 2001 %% Vanyel: oh jeez Vanyel: i was expecting a much better comback than that cuinhell: i'm too stunned by complicated viso drawings to make snappy comebacks Vanyel: ah cuinhell: i have the 1000 yard office stare -- cuinhell, the veteran Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2001 %% Slayer: why is it difficult to find men whgo are single, sensitive, caring, and good looking? -- Slayer looking for love Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2001 %% cuinhell shoves his tww through leo's eardrum and commences to piss. Vanyel: cool Dr_Moni: just singing in the rain, just singing in the rain.. what a wonderful feeeeling, i'm happy again... -- Moni the musician Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2001 %% cuinhell: wow, my boss just displayed spine! -- cuinhell loving his job Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2001 %% Soney: my whole arm hurts now cuinhell: fine. I'll take over finger banging you, just stop complaining about it. :P -- cuinhell being sensitive Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2001 %% Slayer: i think i'm going to become gay and find a black boyfriend marcie: excellent Lia: cool DKwork: slayer, go for it. you might end up with a better chance of getting laid. Lia: the 12 year olds of the world can breathe a sigh of relief Slayer: lia, there are still 12 year old black boys Lia: *sigh* Lia: I give up -- Lia making her last attempt Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 June 2001 %% Soney: I HATE FUCKING MOVING cuinhell: THEN LAY STILL GODDAMMIT -- cuinhell and soney, woo woo! Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2001 %% Vanyel: marcie marcie: :) Vanyel: imgonna build you a 2 stroke penis Vanyel: actually, that sounded bad -- oops. Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2001 %% cuinhell: my penis just broke. -- cuinhell doing God only knows what Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2001 %% Xi: cu, you blew up the crapper next to the fridge right? cuinhell: xi: yes Xi: good, i know which room to avoid cuinhell: go *** Xi is now known as xi-ttm cuinhell: tell me if it stinks cuinhell: i dare you *** xi-ttm is now known as Xi Xi: alright, I just saw the cleaning lady cuinhell: HAHAHHAA Xi: she's headed towards cu's deposit point in a HAZMAT suit cuinhell: was she crying? -- cuinhell and Xi Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2001 %% Slayer: i just had to say something out loud that i thought i wouldn't have to say for at least another 15 or 20 years Slayer: "stop fucking your pregnant sister" -- Slayer seeing his family on TV, we think Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2001 %% cuinhell: how about IP over yarn? Vanyel: for those of us that cant get dsl Vanyel: thatll work Vanyel: but you;'d have to tunnel it over twine cuinhell: hey mom, knit me an OC3 please *** marcafk is now known as marcie Jake: marcie Xi: a knitted sonet ring cuinhell: harhahrar Vanyel: yep cuinhell: and crochet'd microwave towers Xi: gotta watch out for the kitties Xi: one meowmeow could drop your whole SHINS ring cuinhell: QUICK< I NEED ANOTHER NEEDLEPOINT CSU/DSU STAT! cuinhell: oh my god Jake: I wish someone could knit me a beer cuinhell: kitties would be the scourge of twine/yarn nets Xi: yes Xi: bad mr. kitty Soney: go go gadget kitty Xi purrs. -- a new RFC! Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 2001 %% Vanyel: so the cops should shoot anyone that sits around not doing anything? Slayer: yes Vanyel: ian, answer the door, its an police officer to see slay Vanyel: and be sure and put down a dropcloth -- Vanyel with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 June 2001 %% Xi: alternately we could lock him in a room with barbara striesand rockjock: ok, that would be cruel and unusual -- the geeks on Tim McVeigh's execution Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 June 2001 %% cuinhell: the janet reno lubed fist of death -- I dunno, I thought it was funny Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 June 2001 %% Slayer: so there goes the 'southern belle' stereotype i guess marcie: you should have known that when you met me Vanyel: bell maybe Slayer: marcie, compared to carrye you're a gentle southern magnolia blossom carrye: slayer. marcie: bwahahaha Al: HAHAHAHAHA marcie: wr0d. -- there ya go, carrye! *smooch* Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 June 2001 %% *Vanyel* nothing grates my years more than, "dont say that, 'm ugly" Vanyel> oh yah *Vanyel* its the aural equivilant to princess in a bikini *Vanyel* and you can quote that -- Vanyel the inimitable Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 June 2001 %% Sarge: visio has a crime scene add on cuinhell: cool cuinhell: chalk outlines? cuinhell: of goats? Sarge: I think all my network diagrams will have a dead guy in them now cuinhell: HARHAHRAR Sarge: I shall label him user -- Sarge blossoming into a BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 June 2001 %% Kesticle: I just realized the only two bbs people I met I boned.... wob: HAHAHAHAHAH Marianne: lovely Kesticle: I must never meet slay Sarge: haha wob: hahahah marcie: ahahahahahahhahaAHAHhAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAhAhharhaHRAHrArhAjr4qw3o48rjas9 efjasf Cyrano: rofl -- Kestrel, that slut Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 June 2001 %% Vanyel: GODDAMN FINGERSUCKING DICKBITING SHITLICKING DAUGHTERFUCKING FOREST TICK HAVING SHOE LICKING ASS HAIR REMOVERS cuinhell: awesome. Vanyel: ooh Vanyel: that felt good. -- Vanyel letting out his frustrations Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2001 %% Cyrano: cool Cyrano: botulinus toxin has an LD50 of 7 x 10^-9 mg/kg Cyrano: so assuming 80kg per person and 6 billion people Kes: WTF are you doing fucking with botox? Cyrano: 5g would be enough to wipe out the human race distributed properly Kes: nevermind -- Cyrano plotting to take over the world Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2001 %% Vanyel: martin short and rosie odonnel shoud habve a kid Xi: ack cuinhell: NO! Vanyel: just to see what the ugliest stupidest human would LOOK like cuinhell: DO YOU WISH TO BRING ABOUT THE APOCALYPSE> -- cuinhell twitching Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2001 %% Vanyel: spiral penises are rare -- I bloody well hope so Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2001 %% marcie: jerod marcie: i pooped a long, streamlined turd this morning marcie: i thought of you cuinhell: YES! cuinhell: awesome. marcie: i thought about taking a picture for you cuinhell: i nub j00 too marcie: but it was too early to go up and get my camera cuinhell: harhahrar marcie: i was tired marcie: ;) cuinhell: gahaha cuinhell: worn out from that splendid poop marcie: damn right marcie: actually, it was effortless marcie: streamlined, like i said cuinhell: oh cuinhell: well then cuinhell: damn your black heart marcie: *zzzzzlip* *splash* "cool!" cuinhell: harhahr marcie: but it was also 6:30 in the morning cuinhell: hehe marcie: so marcie: no pics cuinhell: i shall name my next good turd after you. marcie: awesome. marcie: think of me when you flush it. cuinhell: hahah -- cuinhell and marcie bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2001 %% marcie: why do people insist on making me want to kill them slowly with a blunt object cuinhell: marcie: that's just one of the little joys in life we have to make time for -- cuinhell and marcie being sysadmins Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2001 %% Lia: Slayer: man. the disney channel is better than porn. Lia: cuinhell: i have never seen anything on disney worth wanking to DKwork: cu doens'tl ike wanking to disney's princesses? Cyrano: he's still stuck on the little mermaid lia Lia: oh DKwork: hmm. b-day cake downstairs. brb. Lia: hell Lia: I always thought it was "101 Dalmatians" Cyrano: ahahahahah -- Slayer getting dissed yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 2001 %% wob: I COUDL EAT OUT THE ASS END OF A MENSTRATIN' SKUNK -- wob having a spasm Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 2001 %% Xi: what a boring day here at work so far Vanyel licks the whole ascii character set upon marcie Xi: whoa -- Xi getting entertained Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2001 %% Slayer: is k having a species crisis? -- Slayer showing concern Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2001 %% Soney: i hate it when lunch smells like bug spray -- Soney having problems at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2001 %% brawk: You just want her for her mind. Vanyel: no Vanyel: her body, too marcie: ahahahahaa -- Vanyel seducing the girlies Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2001 %% Xi: anybody ever mess with one of these orinoco/lucent AP-1000s? Sarge: I had an affair with one once, but I don't like to talk about it -- Sarge's shameful confession Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2001 %% Soney: you guys hear about the lady in houston killing her 5 children? Vanyel: i guess she couldnt get a sitter -- Vanyel, a terrible man Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2001 %% Soney: i am being a bad girl Jake: w0rd Dr_Moni: spankings for you Soney: yes Soney: spank me Soney: :) Jake: but I gotta be drunk first Soney: why? Jake: dunno, why not? marcie: so he doesn't feel bad about fantasizing that you're really slayer Vanyel: SNORK Jake: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Vanyel: marcie. marcie bows Vanyel: I love you. marcie: i know. Soney: shit Dr_Moni: Marcie scores Jake: marcie is still the champion -- I rule. Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 2001 %% cuinhell: dammit, i need more websites to mirror JakeAFK: I need a WHORE! marcie: different strokes for different folks -- the boys having needs Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 June 2001 %% Slayer: hey lid, have you ever masturbated with fruit or vegetables? Vanyel: she has sex with K Vanyel: isnt that the same thing? Vanyel: he's a fruit, at least inteh closet Vanyel: and hes'a vegetable most of the time -- hee. Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 June 2001 %% cuinhell: still got the taste of cock in your mouth eh? Jake: I'm gonna die -- Jake in distress Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2001 %% Jake: I'm gonna make my own OS thats based off of abstract quotes from the bible Jake: thou hath forsaken me! = error -- Jake with a good idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2001 %% Cyrano: I need to go live in a cave or something until this whole internet thing blows over -- Cyrano being anti-social Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2001 %% Vanyel: i once made the mistake of showing marcies quote file to a girl iwas dating -- ha! Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 June 2001 %% cuinhell: i'd be concerned about my asshole being reamed *** Courtney has been disconnected Vanyel: ITS PAINFUL -- Vanyel talking about Sparc Classics, but who can tell, really? Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 June 2001 %% *** Sarge has been disconnected *** Sarge has entered room 'Main' Jake: problems sarge? Sarge: damn it Sarge: yeah Sarge: I mentioned unix and our NT proxies didn't like that marcie: ahahahhah -- Sarge and the Evil Empire Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 June 2001 %% Vanyel: i once had a dream that i woke up and found an O2 in my bed -- Vanyel overdoing it Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 June 2001 %% Manuka: ok, hang on, about to upload marcie: i don't want to hear about your sex life, dude Manuka: *spew* marcie: O:) -- Manuka, who loves it, really Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 July 2001 %% cuinhell: i wonder if I could run for pope Xi: you aren't the pope? cuinhell: time for a little fucking catholic reform Xi: you lied Xi: fucker cuinhell: FROM NOW ON ALL CATHOLIC SCHOOLGIRL OUTFITS WILL BE SANS PANTIES -- cuinhell laying down THE LAW Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 2001 %% Slayer: i accidentally traumatized the hell out of a kitten last night Slayer: he was in the hall looking at berkeley Slayer: so i come out of my room to go piss and he jumps, towards berkeley Slayer: who he now notices is a lot closer to his little self Slayer: so then he looks back at me, who is also now a lot closer Slayer: so there's this little .02 gram kitten sandwiched between me and a large cat Raist: lo ppl Slayer: so he casts a spell and polymorphs into a 4" diamete orange porquepine Slayer: doesn't make one sound Slayer: just stands there and grows spikes Xi: ahahahaha Slayer: and then, of course, being the good father figure that i am, goes "fffsssttt!!!!" causing him to leap approximately 89.34 feet straight up into the air -- Slayer being a nice daddy Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 July 2001 %% cuinhell: i want a cell phone that screams "you've got a fucking call!" Xi: now if you could integrate that with caller id wob: and it gets ruder with each ring wob: "ANSWER ME ASSHOLE" cuinhell: "ANSWER ME ASSHOLE, DON'T LET ME RING IN PUBLIC" Moni: hmm wob: "FUCKING ANSWER ME COCKSUCKER" -- 8th ring -- technological progress hard at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 2001 %% Moni: i was at a sex party this weekend (women only) and some woman's cell phone rang. cuinhell: who was it in? -- cuinhell wanting details Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 2001 %% marcie: so marcie: what's everyone been doing in my absence? marcie: besides saving quotes for me, i mean ;) Vanyel: pining for you marcie: i knew it -- marcie being loved Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2001 %% Cyrano: never mistake an ant for a chocolate sprinkle -- Cyrano with words of wisdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 August 2001 %% Vanyel: I hate my users. Vanyel: and this is beyond normal hate. marcie: good marcie: hone your rage, my apprentice marcie: nurture your hatred Vanyel: this is beyond the hate that the montagues had for the capulets Vanyel: beyond the hate that khan had for kirk marcie: excellent, excellent *** Paris has entered room 'Main' elric: I dunno... Khan really hated Kirk alot marcie: and you think that compares to the depths of hatred a BOFH has for his lusers? elric: For hates sake, I spit my last breath at thee marcie: ha! elric: I hate my lusers, but I guess I've lived with it for so long that I've grown accustomed to it Vanyel: i was also going to say more than whatshisface hatead the whale elric: I havent tried to kill any of them. Just their processes -- elric and vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 August 2001 %% haley: i'm more interested in cultures anyway, but i've thought about being a mortician. heh. Monty: mortuary science can be done in 2 years Jake: least yer customers won't talk back to you -- Jake with vocational guidance Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2001 %% elric: I feel the need to shoot someone and this is as close as I can get legally -- Elric explaining his luv for EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 2001 %% Vanyel: jerod, when was the last time you got laid cuinhell: don't you remember the special time we shared? cuinhell: *sniff* you fucker. -- Vanyel acting JUST LIKE A MAN ;) Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 August 2001 %% Cyrano: so nuke them and hire me Kestrel: I would love to james Kestrel: we would have fun Kestrel: and probably avoid most charges Xi: ahahah Cyrano: rofl Cyrano: I'll bring the high voltage, you bring the ammunition Cyrano: we could work on siege engines on the weekends Cyrano: always wanted to launch watermelons with a trebuchet -- Kes and Cyrano plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 August 2001 %% Vanyel: GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING DOG DICK SUCKING MICROSOFT WINDOWS MEDIA PLAYER USING 300lb NAKED ASS FARMERS Vanyel: AURGH Vanyel: I HATE management. -- Vanyel with another impressive tirade Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 August 2001 %% Slayer: if my mom were cuter and not such a bitch and not my mom she'd make a good girlfriend -- Slayer loving on his momma Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 August 2001 %% Vanyel: anyone running irix in front of a firewall is an idiot anyway Vanyel: irix is like Xi: telnetd Vanyel: the unlocked volkswagen of the unix world Xi: 6.15m or something resolves the issue Vanyel: securing irix is like... putting a sign in that car that says "no radio" Xi: gots no stereo pablo, please attack the beemer next to me Vanyel: OH! NO RADIO? well jeez Vanyel: i'll go get this car that takes a full minute to steal Vanyel: instaod of the s bug that takes about 3 seconds Vanyel: oooo. Vanyel: kittie. Vanyel: i love this band marcie: harhharhARHAHRAHrAHrAHrHarharAHSE$Q!@34qjwefaaaldf *Vanyel* NO RADIO! Xi: SPIT Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: iu'm gonnas tart a heavy metal band Vanyel: and call it NO RADIO marcie: HAHHAHAHA marcie: dew it Vanyel: the cover of my first CD will be a pic of a ferrarri Vanyel: witha "no radio" dign in it Vanyel: itll be a cd full of static and feedback Vanyel: cyz DUH Vanyel: I GOT NO RADIO TO PLAY IT ON Vanyel: heez Vanyel: NO RADIO! marcie: you are such a freak -- Vanyel, very drunk Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2001 %% marcie: layoffs, baybee Soney: ugh Beastie: glad i'm not it Soney: that makes how many of us now? Beastie: i knew being a loser would pan out for me eventually -- Beastie Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2001 %% K: i just killed some ugly people IG_atwrk: shot yourself in the foot? -- K and IG Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2001 %% Beastie: smoking the last cigarette in the house always makes me feel empty -- Beastie having an existential crisis Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 2001 %% Vanyel: all bras should have explosive bolts, in case of emergencies -- Vanyel plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2001 %% K: should we all sacrifice our firstborns? Vanyel: only your mom should -- K getting dissed yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2001 %% wob: im telling you, we need to pool our money and by an island wob: buy wob: then it'll all be good. wob: we'll brew our own beer, grow or own weed... Vanyel: we could always declare ouyrselves a native american tribe, and get a reservation wob: we'll make sarge our local law enforcement ;) Vanyel: till we get the island at least manuka: we can make monty the village idiot wob: perfect -- Manuka with an idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 2001 %% Vanyel: NARF NARF FLEENBLE KILL MY BOSS -- Vanyel having a fit Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 2001 %% Slayer: there's nothing quite as self indulging as masturbating to the 1812 overture and then applauding afterward -- Slayer warming our hearts yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 2001 %% sunbeam: deranged women need love too -- no comment Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2001 %% Vanyel: the sweedish flatulent Vanyel: un de hoo de oun de hut de hoo cuinhell: hahahahahaha Vanyel: onn dit de oon dit de on FART FART FART cuinhell: GAHAHAHAHAHA -- bork! Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2001 %% Moni: nothing like a hardon in leather pants Vanyel: whatever you do dont wear boots Moni plots marcie: don't listen to him marcie: wear boots. Moni: boots are a must with leather pants Vanyel: marcie, i'll hit you with my erection from HERE marcie: h0h0h0 IGadget: detachable? Vanyel: detachable? hell, its LAUNCHABLE! Moni: gonna hit afganastan Moni: Van's penis bomb Vanyel: I CAN FUCK A WOMAN FROM 3,000 MILES AWAY BY REMOTE CONTROL IGadget: vanyel w/ Kung Fu Actuion Grip Vanyel: GUIDED CRUISE PENIS! marcie: HAHAHAHAHAH Moni: bwahahahahahaha Vanyel: tho the missle video is ... interesting Vanyel: now THATS something I wanna see on CNN Vanyel: bernard shaw at a desk Vanyel: "We are now viewing guided cruise penis footage from afganastan" marcie: ahahahhaa Moni: releases spooge upon impact Vanyel: OH MY GOD! WHAT IS THAT~! Moni: toxic spooge Vanyel: they arent cirumcized Vanyel: OH MY GOD THATS GROSS! IGadget ponders putting a wireless spy camera in a vibrator Moni giggles Vanyel: the foreskin comes back to release multiple impact reentry veichles Vanyel: anyway Vanyel: i better quit while i'm ahead Vanyel: err a head. Vanyel: yeah marcie: *ba boom CHING* -- GUIDED CRUISE PENIS! Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2001 %% Al: HOLY SHIT Al: HOLY FUCKING SHIT Al: HOLY SHIT Al: WOW marcie: uh marcie: al? Al: WOW THING! Al: WOW!!! cuinhell: uh. Vanyel: uhhh Al has wireless ethernet. Vanyel: hey al Vanyel: did you just score? Vanyel: oh marcie: hahahahah Al just plugged it in marcie: you geek. Vanyel: almost as good. -- Al being a geek Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2001 %% *** Kestrel has entered room 'Main' Kestrel: is it normal when you bend over to pick up a 100lb box your left nut goes KERBLAM? Kestrel: ok, I have to go find a mop... *** Kestrel has left the room marcafk: allllllllllllllllllllrightythenbyebyenow -- Kestrel leaving us worried Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2001 %% Vanyel: i'm takingmy ass out shopping Vanyel: for some headphones marcie: liar Vanyel: or saundo: yeah marcie: you're just going to frys so you'll look cool marcie: ;) Vanyel: well that too Vanyel: i'm gonna go pick up chicks at frys -- Vanyel being a big, big nerd Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2001 %% marcie: "jeezus loves yew!" saundo: "jeezus is your frieeeeeeeend" saundo: "come to jesus" cuinhell: come to butthead marcie: HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA saundo: let us saundo: friends, let us saundo: score marcie: jeezus loves you and so do i, saundo -- the crew getting religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 2001 %% saundo: jesus does not love me saundo: or else he would have replied to my email -- saundo, the quotable Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 2001 %% Vanyel: ok Vanyel: wanna know the definition of scary? marcie: of course Vanyel: seeing your sisters pic on hot or not marcie: ahahahhaHAHAHAhAHrHArHarHarHaRHaRHARASRQ@#$!@Q3 -- amihotornot.com awaits! Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 2001 %% Moni: 13 years of vegetariasm..ruined by one taste of Leo meat -- Moni, converted Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2001 %% sunbeam: i've got an attitude problem that pops up occasionally Cyrano: occasionally? sunbeam: ok, hardly ever -- sunbeam lies Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 October 2001 %% Vanyel: i fucking HATE UPS Vanyel: HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE IndyJ: that swedish penis pump didnt arrive on time eh van? Vanyel: no, that came via usps Vanyel: ups lost my realdoll IndyJ: those bastards -- IndyJ empathizing Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 October 2001 %% Slayer: today i dreamed i went to church Slayer: that's it Vanyel: oph Vanyel: so whats up slay Slayer: oh and i had sex with my mother IGadget: is that the first nightmare you have had in a while? -- Slayer with problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 October 2001 %% Slayer: i can't believe this house doesn't have mustard in it IGadget: I thought fairys just have wings...they have tails too? Vanyel: I could take a shit in a piece of bread for you Vanyel: it looks kinda yellow Megs hands slay mustard Slayer: you should eat less curry IGadget: pardon me do you have any grey poopon? Megs: eww Vanyel: ahahaha Vanyel: AHAHAHAHAHAHA Vanyel: holy shit gadget Vanyel: you said something funny! Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Slayer: that's the first funny thing he's ever said IGadget: occasionally I slip up -- IGadget paying his dues Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 October 2001 %% ed: your official position on lusers? marcie: position "on" lusers? boot on neck, preferably ed: that'll pass. ed: I was looking for 6 feet under marcie: ed, death isn't as much fun as torture. ed: I didn't say they'd be dead, or in an airtight box -- marcie and ed bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 October 2001 %% cuinhell: tits. Vanyel: no wonder i've been in such a jovial mood -- huh huh, huh huh Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 November 2001 %% Cyrano: most annoying thing about darvocet Cyrano: I can't tell if my legs are there or not -- Cyrano on drugs (so to speak) Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 November 2001 %% Kestrel: the canadians are offering assitance in the war Kestrel: 2 battle ships Cyrano: "war" Cyrano: those wacky canadians Kestrel: it's a war, make no mistake Kestrel: 600 troops Cyrano: hm Cyrano: wonder what side Quebec is taking Kestrel: 16 fighter aircraft Kestrel: after the exchange rate I wonder what we'll do with the canoe, 2 mounties and the flying squirel Cyrano: ahahahah -- Kestrel on our friendly neighbors Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 November 2001 %% Vanyel: all of a sudden, my term type goes weird Soney: it's gremlins Kestrel: it's the hooded flesh snake!! Kestrel: RUN! *** Vanyel has been disconnected Kestrel: see? -- Kestrel making Dire Predictions Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 2001 %% Beastie: i want to set myself on fire and drive down the interstate Beastie: wrapped in an america flag with big speakers blaring god bless america over nad over Beastie: simply to be on cnn wob: sounds like something hunter s thompson would do wob: and if you DO it wob: i'll go with you Cyrano: taco sauce Beastie: sounds like something tray l britt would do Beastie: you can be my driver wob: awesome wob: i'm there Beastie: and mster of ceremony wob: im gonna have a 3foot bong between my legs as we cruise wob: maybe a nice american flag soaked in ether laid accross the dashboard Beastie: i thought you had turned gung ho patriotic wob: pahaha wob: yeah right -- Beastie with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2001 %% Kestrel: hells bells, SHOW them something about the wild side...heheheeh Moni: ohh..i think they've seen too much excitement Kestrel: "these are chaps, this is a thumb restraint and this...THIS is the TwatBlaster 6000!!!" -- Kes giving Moni suggestions on sex-ed class Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2001 %% K-yel: my chat.yahoo.com chicks are in the house K-yel: my one stalker cant leave me alone K-yel: she wants some K IGosleep: just poll the quotes file for random strings from him meg: GOD DRINKS PEE Mord: Special K more like. K-yel: meg i thought you were afriend elric: yah... I could probably adapt something from my irc bot script meg: sorry k i thought you were too K-yel: i'm going to have to ignore you, or i'll go to hell along with you Slayer: fuck jesus IGosleep is now ignoring slayer K-yel: niggers 2:11 - Thou shalt take xanax and drink beer, against caution of your doctors *** K-yel is now known as Vanyel -- the crew making a K-bot Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 November 2001 %% brawk: Married men live longer than single men. Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: cuz their wives wont let them die w/o permission -- Vanyel's not bitter Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 November 2001 %% Cyrano: I remember the first time I crashed os x Cyrano: all I did was untar a 3gb file Cyrano: containing 80000 files -- can't think why the Mac crashed... Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 November 2001 %% carrye: does auggie still have a homepage? marcie: dunno carrye: hrmph carrye: stupid billy marcie: ask billy marcie: or van carrye: van is clueless marcie: uh. marcie: van hosts auggie. Vanyel: oh really Jake: yer ugly too van Jake: hehehe techs: oh this should be good. marcie: yeah van marcie: and your tits are too big Vanyel: bash-2.03# apachectl stop MoniOut: unlike marcie's which are perfect Al: hahah Vanyel: /usr/sbin/apachectl stop: httpd stopped marcie: harharharh Vanyel: nope Vanyel: auggie does not have a webpage. marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH Jake: hahahaha Al: werd to the nazi admins carrye: you ass carrye: vanyel carrye: :( Frayed: auggie's still around? I thought they would've self-destructed by now Vanyel: you told me to bite you Vanyel: consider yourself bitten. carrye cries Vanyel: mmm Vanyel: i love it when they cry. *** carrye has been disconnected Vanyel: it makes the bofh in me feel energised anew marcie: YEAH Jake: hahahahahaha Vanyel: i think ic an survive another day or two at AOL now marcie: werd. -- Vanyel the nazi BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 November 2001 %% Cyrano: In the same spirit as the long-running Sun-Managers mailing list, Cyrano: there now exists a Linux-Managers mailing list, hosted on the same Cyrano: machine. Cyrano: http://www.linuxmanagers.org Vanyel: before i look. Vanyel: that IS a joke, right? Cyrano: nyet, gospodin Vanyel: so its actually a group of linux people, trying to emulate sun managers? Vanyel: their faq missed a poijnt Vanyel: 1.7) How can i read this list without laughing milk out my nose? -- Vanyel, the BSD boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 November 2001 %% marcie: every straight man in the history of the multiverse wants to see two chicks get it on marcie: probably my dad among them Slayer: no Vanyel: only if I can help. marcie: sick as that is Slayer: sometimes it's 3 marcie: heheh marcie: well yah Slayer: or 4 Slayer: 5 even Slayer: 6 maybe Slayer: 7 and a goat Vanyel: 8 and topaz Slayer: goddamit i'm eating Slayer: or was Vanyel: if your enot gonna finish that, i'm hungry marcie: hee Moni gets it on with marcie Vanyel helps marcie: awesome. Vanyel: I BROUGHT MY POWER TOOLS! marcie: YEAH -- the usual sickness Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 2001 %% Vanyel: anyone here use microsoft outlook? AQUAMAN: Only as a coaster. -- Aquaman the Microsoft fan Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 2001 %% *Vanyel* i'm gonna take three people, and you KNOW which three... and fly them up into the himalayas and drop them off with nothing buit a set of steak knives and a TV camera crew -- Vanyel with a plan Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 2001 %% Moni: ooo../me eats herself saundo blinks saundo: marcie saundo: cut and paste that marcie: ahahahah Moni: lunch :> saundo: ahahahaha saundo koffs Moni: : Moni: > Moni: hm Moni: i've eaten my smile saundo: ahahahah saundo: you ARE hungry -- Moni and Saundo Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 November 2001 %% Slayer: marcie, i have a confession to make marcie: okay marcie: tell aunt marcie Slayer: i'm not really a fat white 27 year old man. in actuality i'm a slender attractive 19 year old exotic dancer. marcie: you hide it well, slay marcie: you hide it well. Slayer: i've been fooling yall all these years marcie: we were indeed well fooled Slayer: now if you'll excuse me, i'm going to buy wall to wall full length mirrors and find a few lesbians marcie: do carry on marcie: and make sure i get a copy of the videotape -- Slayer living his fantasy Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 November 2001 %% IGadget: ahh ok thatsa good, Im humg like a T-rex Caroline: what Caroline: extinct? -- Caroline the sweet and innocent Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 November 2001 %% marcie: i never needed to breathe through my ears until i started dating girls IGadget: Ive always dated girls, the only thing I became skilled at was breathing through their nose -- IGadget with nary a clue, poor thing Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 November 2001 %% IGadget: jer also has one that is "he doesnt just have issues, he has a life time subscription." which I think of every time I talk to K -- IGadget firing a shot in the quote war Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 November 2001 %% Moni: The cashew's closest relative is the mango Moni: odd Moni: a nut and a fruit related Moni: hmm..sounds like my family -- Moni, regarding her loving family Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 2001 %% wob: i swear i hang out with a bunch of plague ridden retards -- wob complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 2001 %% Cerberus: huhuh, Cerberus: they found thrax in my zipcode Cerberus: the dept of state mail facility is a mile or so away from me wob: ahahaha Cerberus: i held my breath for like two days. it sucked. marcie: THRAXBOY wob: thraxboy wob: apparently you didnt hold it long enough! Cerberus: apparently not. meg: when he dies you guys wont think it's so funny Kestrel: wanna bet? Moni: this _is_ EN ya know Kestrel: exactly wob: yeah really, its party time at his funeral Cerberus: if I die - I'm getting my balls bronzed and sending them to wob for a computer monitor trinket. meg: not like any of us would know anyway wob: awesome wob: I'll mount them like I would a moose head marcie: w00p Kestrel: make them into tracballs wob: HAHAHAH -- the crew planning Cerb's funeral Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 2001 %% *** K has been disconnected Kestrel: "and jeee-ZUZ smote the babbling fools connection, rending it asunder -- Kestrel preaching the werd Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 November 2001 %% Cyrano: it's funny tying someone up with saran wrap when they don't believe it can be done -- Cyrano on his sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2001 %% Moni: I like to impregnant bovine in my spare time -- Moni on *her* sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2001 %% Vanyel: i want some heroin. Vanyel: I wanna sit here drooling all over myself when the lusers approach Vanyel: I can see it now marcie: heheheh Cyrano: no Cyrano: you want to make them crumple and drool Cyrano: wait Cyrano: they do that already Vanyel: "hey leo? we need to make sybase accounts all uid 0 now, ok? thaaaanks" Vanyel: *droool* Vanyel: "uhh, when do you thin that'll be done?" Vanyel: *droooooooooooooooooooooooool* Vanyel: "maybe by tomorrow?" Vanyel: *choke* Vanyel: "ok, by friday!" Vanyel: *droooool* marcie: hehehehehe Vanyel: "thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanks!" -- Vanyel and his lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2001 %% Cyrano wonders what the elastic modulus of the female ass is Kesticle: depends querk: how many foot pounds can you drop on it? Cyrano: definitely not an elastic collision querk: what is the Newton limit? Cyrano: hell with newton querk: the friction coefficient querk: the normal force Cyrano: some people you have to be worried more about Keplers laws querk: ahahah querk: man. RUg burn on the ass is NO laughing matter Vanyel: rofl querk: neither is linolium burn Vanyel: i love you guys -- the crew discussing academic matters Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2001 %% Cyrano: a vaginal flask would probably be the ideal temp for refluxing ethyl ether Kestrel: SNORK marcie: you are all weirdos -- weirdos. Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% Paris: i like to say sodomy Manuka: woo! -- Manuka likes sodomy too, eh? Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% Vanyel: I fucking hate this job Kes: the best time to look for a new job is while you still have one... go for it! Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: the best time to look for a job is when othe rocmpanies are laying off people like you Cyrano: the best time to look for a job is after your confidence has been supercharged by a 7AM blowjob Kes: hahahah... words of truth -- Cyrano tells the truth Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% Kes: hmmm Kes: ahem Kes: la la la la.... Kes: ok boys.... hit it Kes: Moni goes to Shower Kes: do you see what I see? Kes: a femme, a femme, a soapy lathered femme Kes: with toys piled high as her box Kes: do you hear what I hear? Kes: a moan, a groan, the sound of the silicon bone Kes: while waiting for her dyke to come home.... -- Kestrel gets musical Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% Vanyel: my nipples have never gotten hard wob: are you dead? -- wob, concerned Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% Kestrel: I cannot be expected to tread water in this pool of stupid indefinitely -- Kestrel on his workplace Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% K: i got my picture atm card today K: i look like a moron marcie pauses marcie: nah marcie: too easy marcie goes back to websurfing -- K setting himself up Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% Vanyel: perl is an evil tool, most often used for good. -- Van on coding Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% K: i don't use the thumb at all K: i palm the ball Slayer: he palms his balls K: and put my hand under the ball K: and just use my wrist to twist Slayer: play by play of k's masturbation technique K: not the whole arm K: isn't there some afghani you need to go relieve a shift for slayer -- K on bowling... we think Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2001 %% jairus: how life? Jake: fucking horrible jairus: that bad Vanyel: you could be dead. Vanyel: that would bre worse. Jake: I am dead Kestrel: you only smell that way -- Kestrel being compassionate Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 2001 %% marcie: i'm starting to get suspicious marcie: 2 people have come by this morning to make sure i know where the coffee is marcie: that's just weird Manuka: hehehehe marcie: they're being too nice. Beastie: arsenic in the coffee marcie: ahahahahahhaha ed: ahaha Manuka: no, you see, what probably happened is that nobody told the *last* BOFH, and s/he snapped ed: or worse ed: yea Manuka: and, being good little lusers, learned from the experience marcie: ahrharharharhharar ed: or, the last BOFH ran a tight ship ed: I bet theyre sliipping Manuka: it probably now says in the new BOFH manual, "IMPORTANT SAFETY NOTE: Make sure the new BOFH knows where the coffee is" ed: old BOFH had coffee dougnuts hand delivered ed: they're trying to see if you're rule will lessen the yoke ed: you mustn't falter marcie: they can only hope. -- the BOFH with suspicions Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2001 %% DontKnow: my ass is still virginal though. Moni squeezes the kesticles *** wob has left the room Kestrel: oh shit Marianne: heh sunbeam: you grossed out wob marcie: thank god Kestrel: that was a record... water hit the cube wall behind my monitor... marcie: hee Kestrel: well done marcie: i spit coke everywhere Moni: ARUGH *** wob has entered room 'Main' marcie: now i have it on my khakis, damnit ed: hahah wob: ughta ed: wob was drivting off thinking about he and DK and marci and cynthia sunbeam: you people are crazy ed: trying to angle a sheep in there somewhere marcie: heh heh heh -- DK way oversharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2001 %% Cyrano: there are more things in heaven and Ebay Cyrano: than are dreamt of in our philosophy -- Cyrano philosophizing Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2001 %% Toby: its a good thing I stole windows ME. I'd be pissed if I paid for it -- the guest gets a quote! Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 December 2001 %% Cyrano: now instead of the unwashed masses sniffing my packets Cyrano: all I have to worry about is Monty -- Cyrano on ssh encryption Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2001 %% Cyrano: for xmas this year I'd like to see Martha Stewart compete on an eqisode of junkyard wars. Vanyel: YES! -- Cyrano making out his wish list Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2001 %% Vanyel: i found DOG SHIT in the lab jus tnow marcie: werd Vanyel: a nice, steaming pile of dog shit Vanyel: i mean REAL dog shit marcie: my dog took a shit in the middle of the inbound call support area once... it ruled Vanyel: not intel servers marcie: yeah marcie: ahahahahah marcie: it's hard to tell the difference sometimes Vanyel: and the dog was sitting here Vanyel: looking at me Vanyel: "LOOK WHAT I MADE! A MADE A DELL SERVER!" marcie: jahahaahahAHRHArHaRHAJRAHjfdalsdkf;a -- Vanyel having problems at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2001 %% Cyrano: few things are sexier than a woman in a welding mask -- Cyrano on Martha Stewart Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2001 %% Cyrano: dear lord Cyrano: someone actually built fufme for real Vanyel: oh wow Vanyel: i've always wanted to fuck my computer Vanyel: now i really can AQUAMAN: USB TWW? marcie: firewire marcie: much faster AQUAMAN: oh yah AQUAMAN: fireweiner! marcie: hahahhah -- fuck you, fuck me Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2001 %% Cyrano: damn exploding cows -- Cyrano, who has this problem often Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2001 %% saundo: "so marcie, we have a complaint against you from one ofthe CS students..." marcie: yeah] marcie: "really?" *clickety click* saundo: "he says you poured liquid nitrogen down the back of his pants and cracked his buttocks with a hammer" ed: hehe saundo: "what say you?" marcie: "that's ridiculous!" saundo: "bend over" saundo: :-) marcie: "it awas the FRONT of his pants!" ed: "that was the back of his pants? I meant to do the front" saundo: or "where's my hammer" marcie: "these damn little-endian cs students... *mumble*" ed: speaking of nmap saundo: "I can't hit something that small, so I went for his butt" -- saundo and marcie bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2001 %% Mistress: never apologise for big breasts and tigh tleather saundo: ahahahahah marcie: words to live by -- Moni imparting wisdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2001 %% saundo pours cholocate on marcie for moni saundo: 'tis the season -- saundo sharing holiday cheer Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2001 %% Jim: i used to drink any beer in my teens.. now im more picky marcie: it depends on what *kind* of beer Jim: Corona and Miller Export Draft probably my favorites Jim: Corona with a slice of lime.. very tasty marcie: and you say yuyou're picky? -- marcie the beer snob Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2001 %% Moni: Vanyel: marcie come back goddamnit Moni: *** marcie has entered room 'Main' Moni: I wish I had that power over marcie Vanyel: most people do. -- Moni and Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 December 2001 %% Moni: hurmph Moni: where is Marcie zag: fairly inconspicuous, especially during rugby tournaments Al: HAHAHAHAH -- marcie being flattered Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 December 2001 %% Vanyel: wob is a weinerschnitzel wob: shaddap jew Vanyel: dont call me a jew, you fuckin kike -- the boys share the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2001 %% Toby: my girlfriend has specific rules for our relationship, and the firt one is I cant have any othet girlfriends -- Toby gets a good one again Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 December 2001 %% IG_afk: its too boring here for me, stop messaging to eachoterh marcie: shut up, leo's about to come -- marcie being a good friend Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 December 2001 %% sunbeam: hey william merry xmas Slayer: oh, is that what that was -- Slayer, distracted Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 December 2001 %% saundo: trade secshul favors for network time saundo: for most geeks, nipple viewage will send them off wanking into a room somewhere Marianne: heh Soney: and you can break their network in peace saundo: and if they complain, show thigh saundo: it's all a sliding scale -- saundo with advice for Marianne Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2001 %% marcie: embrace chaos, baybee saundo: embrace it? stranglehold it! -- saundo living it up Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2001 %% saundo: i am full of... something. saundo: coffee, I think marcie: that wasn't my first guess marcie: but carry on saundo: ahahahah saundo: your first guess was?! Soney: ahahaha marcie: i shall not repeat it saundo: awww, come on marcie: for i will not speak ill of my fellow bofh in front of the unwashed masses marcie: :) saundo: beeeyatch marcie: oh all RIGHT marcie: salmon, saundo. saundo: full of salmon? marcie: yes. saundo: i eat tuna. marcie: salmon. marcie snickers marcie: really saundo: you ARE weird. saundo: shut your pie hole saundo: :-) marcie: hee marcie: pie hole. marcie: tuna. marcie: hee hee hee marcie: sorry marcie: i'm six, you know saundo: ahahahah -- marcie playing guessing games Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2001 %% marcie: and i love you, even though you're 18 feet tall saundo: i am not 18 feet tall marcie: one day i really will chew your ankles right off saundo: I used to be, but then I started drinking marcie: h0h0h0h0 marcie: damn, that explains why i'm shrinking! saundo: yes! marcie: fuck marcie: by the time the wedding gets here, i'll be a coffee table -- marcie and her drinking habits Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2001 %% saundo: i don't want to alarm anyone saundo: but I think I lost my ass -- saundo, worried Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2001 %% DKafk: i'm debating selling my soul. *** wob has left the room *** wob has entered room 'Main' IGadget: what do you think you will get for it? wob: A big bag of SHIT -- wob sending dk to hell Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2001 %% brawk: I am Chief Asswipe in the Suckatorium -- brawk enjoying his station in life Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 December 2001 %% Beastie: are you a milf YaHoo: a what Beastie: mother i like to fuck YaHoo: how rude! Soney: that's not an answer -- inquiring minds want to know Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2002 %% Vanyel: manager = coder that has RSI -- Vanyel with the technical definition Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2002 %% Cyrano: hm Cyrano: is mustard supposed to be green? -- Cyrano with a question Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2002 %% Xi: nothing like restating the obvious but, MS Exchange is possibly the biggest POS in the universe -- Xi complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 January 2002 %% Cyrano: you're never really alone with a rubber duck -- Cyrano with words of comfort Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 January 2002 %% ed: goddamit ed: they should fucking outlaw ajax Cyrano: ? ed: I fucking swear our motherfucking billing wench snorts a fucking can of the stuff every fuking day before coming to work -- ed complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2002 %% Moni: nothing like hot sperm -- the lesbian with a mood swing Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2002 %% china: Well, I think I finally got proof of m parents' acceptance of my queerness china: they got me Rocky Horror action figures for Christmas Moni: woohoo! Vanyel: ahahah Vanyel: awesome Al: neat Moni: I'm jealous china: "Warning! Choking Hazard! Not for Children Under 3" china: Ooookay china: "Mom! Billy Joe is choking on Frank's fishnets!" -- China corrupting the young Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2002 %% Vanyel: can i put that I havnt killed anyone as a good thing on my selv eval? china: only if it's accurate -- Vanyel on his self-evaluation for work Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2002 %% Beastie: what are computers/ K: they are these things that allow us to check our football scores -- K, the junkie Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2002 %% K: i would like a full asshole hair electrolysis K: it would be nice to wipe my ass quickly like a girl K: the only thing is its prolly expensive K: i knwo i'd charge a shitload K: to spread somebody's crack and do every hair one by one -- K's fascinating babble Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2002 %% Slayer: do you realize how hard it is to get semen off of a stucco ceiline Slayer: g Marianne: oh dear Xi: ahahahaha Vanyel: fuck stucco Xi: that's what got him into this mess Manuka: vanyel: I think that's the *point* Vanyel: do you have any idea how hard it is to get out of sgi power supply air filters? Slayer: slightly less difficult than getting it int here in the first place? Vanyel: prolly -- Vanyel and Slayer bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Vanyel: ooh Vanyel: theres 88 sex offenders in my zip code Xi: no fair listing your own name 88 times -- Vanyel getting reprimanded Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Vanyel: what can i give myself so I can stay awake when i've had no sleep Xi: van: an enema -- Xi being helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Vanyel: sometimes a cigar is just a cigar Xi: hmmm Cyrano: sometimes a cigar is just a delivery device for a federally subsidized and recognized toxin generation industry Vanyel: and bread is just a delivery device for butter Cyrano: butter Kestrel: sometimes a cigar is a vaginal swab Cyrano: ahahah Vanyel: GUNS AND BUTTER Cyrano: butter in potato leek soup wob: GUNS AND BUBBLES marcie: god you people are weird AQUAMAN: I can't believe it's not Clinton Cyrano: nice tie-together Kestrel: tuna kitty treats Xi: kes has the munchies! Kestrel: or a Macanudo, you be the judge Kestrel: I do Cyrano: "Honey, the cat's eating styroform again. Cyrano: No dear, that's New Friskies Piffles!" Xi: good thing I reread that, I thought it was "or a Menudo, you be the judge" marcie: now that's different -- weirdos Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Cyrano: I tell you though wob: HAHAHAHA Cyrano: pot doesn't make me hungry Cyrano: but it does make everything taste really good Kestrel: esp. wives Cyrano: ahahah wob: HAHAHAH kes marcie: hahahahahaha -- Kes making a funny Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Vanyel: the dumb chineese/japaneese/whatever chick that is my cubemate complained about an obscene song my radio was playing just now wob: hahaha oh im sure Vanyel: is still playing actually marcie: awesome wob: dont use a hair test on them, thats for sure ;) Vanyel: oh but waut Vanyel: you know the song hot blooded, by forigner? Xi: yeah wob: HAHAHAH marcie: ahahahahaha wob: that song is HORRIBLE marcie: YEAH Cyrano: got a fever of a hundred and three Vanyel: she thought the song went "hot butted" wob: ahahha AQUAMAN: i was expecting "kung fu fighting" Cyrano: ahahAHAHAHAHAHAH marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA Xi: ehahahahahahahaha wob: HOT BUTTED wob: CHECK IT AND SEE Vanyel: hot butted Vanyel: take a shit and see AQUAMAN cackles Cyrano: FLIED LICE WITH THAT? wob: HOT BUTTED YOU CAN DO MORE THAN THAT wob: IM HOT BUTTTED IM HOT BUTTED Vanyel: god, i love this place sometimes wob: oh man wob: great wob: GREAT wob: that song is stuck IN MY HEAD NOW Cyrano: oh my sides marcie: damn you loe marcie: leo, too AQUAMAN: puts a new perspective on dirty white boy Cyrano starts singing "Yellow Submarine" *** Vanyel has left the room *** Vanyel has entered room 'Main' Cyrano: *** Vanyel (HOT BUTTED!): marcie: YEAH Vanyel: i couldnt resist Cyrano: how did I guess? marcie: the sharing of minds in here gets scary sometimes wob: becase its only been going on for 10 FUCKING YEARS wob: you just now caught on wob: ;) Cyrano: wait Cyrano: I know how to really weird out cow-orkers wob: heh Cyrano: I'll make some custard in the microwave Cyrano: out of those cornstarch packing piffles wob: ewwwww marcie: ahahahahahahah! Vanyel: AHAHAHHA Cyrano: just pour them in there Vanyel: I love you guys Cyrano: add a little vanilla Cyrano: dab of sugar marcie: MMMM Xi: don;'t forget the approriate glassware marcie: CORNSTARCH CUSTARD Vanyel: ASSWARE marcie: hahahaah wob: HOT BUTTED ASSWARE Vanyel: this is vanyel. Cyrano: hey Vanyel: THIsis VANYEL on noSLEEP Vanyel: YEAH Cyrano: I could pull vanillin out of cardboard if I boiled it in lye Cyrano: "Packing cartons: part of this nutritious breakfast" Vanyel: and I could pull a rabbit out of this hat Xi: hell, put the lye in there too wob: and do you happen to just have lye hanging around the office? marcie: i'd say i'm speechless, but that would be too obvious marcie: of course he does Xi: doesn't everyone? marcie: he's jamez :) AQUAMAN: you don't? wob: for the lusers, thats true Cyrano: no Cyrano: maybe flux remover would work wob: "have some candy, then we'll fix your problem:" Xi: hehe Cyrano: hey wob: IM HOT BUTTED IM HOT BUTTED Cyrano: if the bomb ever drops, we'll have a lot of cardboard and packing peanuts and a lot of hungry people Cyrano: this could be useful knowledge marcie: i don't want to know in what universe this makes sense marcie: ;) AQUAMAN: hmm. the breakfast that squeaks wob: OURS Xi: something tells me the remainder of the human race will degenerate to ass-grazing cattle marcie: hahahahaha marcie: so true AQUAMAN: chompchompsqueakchompsqueaksqueak marcie: i'm hungry. wob: hot butted ass grazing shit monday bitches marcie: aw jeah. Vanyel: oh man AQUAMAN: two-hunnered and fo'tee pounds uhv butted...awww yeah Vanyel: apparently the 'neese lady made a formal complaint Vanyel: to my boss in email marcie: ahahahahaha! wob: fuck her marcie: awesome! Xi: in the ass Vanyel: my boss was trying really hard not to laugh wob: slap that jap all the way back to orientalland marcie: HOT BUTTED marcie: CHECK IT AND SEE wob: CHECK IT AND SEE Xi: fire up some Pizzicato Five for her marcie: I GOT A FEVAH OF A HUNDED AND THEE wob: CMON BABY YOU CAN DO MORE THAN THAT wob: IM HOT BUTTED IM HOT BUTTED wob: god wob: i need to go home wob: NOW wob: before this gets worse marcie: nonsense marcie: IT ONLY GETS BETTER FROM HERE wob: thats what im afraid of ;) AQUAMAN: kind of ironic that she chooses "foreigner" to complain about wob: HAHAHAHAHAHAH marcie: hee -- hot butted! Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Vanyel: never hack apache when you're on dayquil -- Vanyel with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Cyrano: US5889223 Cyrano: 03/30/1999 Cyrano: Karaoke apparatus converting gender of singing voice to match octave of song Cyrano: you know Cyrano: some patents we could do without Vanyel: rofl Moni: heh Moni: I want karaoke in my car Cyrano: oh no Cyrano: I even know what we can sell it as Vanyel: CAR-aoke Cyrano: YES Cyrano: tie into a hands free microphone ala cellphone marcie: i want to know how your mind works, james marcie: so i can make sure to stop it with the next generation Cyrano: ahahah Vanyel: its a rube goldberg device marcie: breed it right out of the species :) Vanyel: you put a marble in his ear Vanyel: and it goes down a chute marcie: heheheh Vanyel: starts a little train spinning ina circle meg: too late, he's already got three kids marcie: this would not surprise me. Vanyel: the traun twists a pair of ropes Vanyel: when they get twisted enough, a thought pops out marcie: best explanation i've heard yet Kestrel: liars Cyrano: aheh Vanyel: DONT YOU WANNA HANG OUT WITH THE BLEACH BOYS, BABY Kestrel: it is superior mental processing of mundane information, turning it into super intelect marcie: kissass. Vanyel: in other words, his mom dropped him on his head in JHUST the right way. marcie: ahahahahahah Kestrel: yes, I still need that sperm sample for my experiments marcie: i knew it -- brain? what is brain? Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Vanyel: i'd give slay a spongebath for a powerbook! -- Vanyel the whore Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2002 %% Vanyel: whack it Vanyel: jack it meg: smack it meg: pack it *** meg has left the room: ex it -- meg rhyming Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 2002 %% Vanyel: well you know what they say about dongs resembling their owners -- reaaaally? Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 2002 %% Slayer: i turned china from lesbianism and introduced her to the pleasures of anal sex Slayer: i'm sorry Lia: no you're not marcie: i'll believe that next time she tells me about it while we're smoking post-coital cigarettes Slayer: no i'm not marcie: ;) Slayer: damn your black heart DontKnow: slay tried to do that. I think he failed, though Slayer: marcie, i honsetly don't care who you bed after i've made my conquests. that's just bonus points for me. Slayer: if _I_ can turn someone to the pleasures of hating men, i've done my job marcie: hee hee Lia: HAHAHAHAHA -- Slay striving for excellence Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 January 2002 %% *** krokus has entered room 'Main' Slayer: no one is awake to netsex, go away *** krokus has been disconnected -- Slay being commanding Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 January 2002 %% wob: are you sure you're not decendants of circus midgets? Cyrano: well Cyrano: my wife's grandmother very nearly joined the circus at 15 wob: hahaha Cyrano: would have probably changed things a bit Cyrano: and Cyrano: my sister Sarah there went on tour with a circus company in NYC last month Cyrano: her bf is a performer wob: HAHAHAHAHAHA Cyrano: he's cool Cyrano: impressed the rest of my family by juggling a half dozen flaming torches the first time he met them :) marcie: i knew your weirdness had to be genetic -- this explains it all! Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2002 %% Moni: I love Barry Moni: even saw him in concert Moni: hitachi is your friend marcie: now that's a disturbing juxtaposition Moni: heh Moni chuckles Moni: I get the hots for Barry marcie: i'm scared now -- Barry Manilow and Moni's Hitachi Magic Wand Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2002 %% wob: whoopdeedoo marcie: a;dflja;sldfasf wob: its another FUCK SHIT MONDAY BLEH T: thanks Wob. my sentiments EXACTLY zag: yeah wob zag: FUCK SHIT MONDAY BLEH wob: its a mantra marcie: i heard that. marcie: FUCK SHIT MONDAY BLEH marcie: we had this last monday too wob: repeat over and over many times, and just MAYBE you might feel better about it being monday marcie: it's becoming a trend wob: yes -- ohhmmmm, ohhhmmmm Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2002 %% wob: its 10:45 and i already need a beer and a bonghit marcie: i love you wob -- wob complaining about Monday Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2002 %% zag: idealism is for people with a trust fund -- zag the wise one Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2002 %% Vanyel: only in america would we come up with a disease where someone who could get as much to eat as they want, DOESNT. -- Vanyel on anorexia Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2002 %% Slayer: ok *** Slayer has left the room *** Slayer has entered room 'Main' Slayer: i got lost -- Slayer the stoned one Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2002 %% Slayer: woohoo Slayer: i am not the weakest link Beastie: i dont know if i would go that far -- Slayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2002 %% Vanyel: you know Vanyel: the army spends all this money coming up with ways fo camoflaguing their troops Vanyel: they should just study remote controls Vanyel: the way they can hide ANYWHERE marcie: ahahahaha -- Vanyel with a good idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2002 %% Moni: I have a client who is a Gosple singer/crack addict/womanizer Moni: I love christians -- Moni being spiritual Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2002 %% china: Alright, I need advice Cyrano: ahahah marcafk: yawn *** marcafk is now known as marcie Vanyel: move to california and dye your hair, nance marcie: wear the *black* miniskirt brawk: china: ask away china: And it scares me that I'm coming here to get it, but nevertheless -- China with righteous fear Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2002 %% china: A stupid student threatened me today. What's your professional opinion. ;D Moni: shoot first -- Moni the professional Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2002 %% Cyrano: but odd things have disappeared [from google's usenet database] Cyrano: like a middle part of a multipart post Jake: telling you its the man marcie: ahahahah marcie: sounds like a BOFH at work! wob: its the man duod wob: or wob: the database has come to life wob: and is now feeding Cyrano: ahahah Cyrano: the sum knowledge it has of humanity is through 20 years of usenet postings Cyrano: may god help us all. wob: yes marcie: ahahahahah wob: exactly wob: imagine the fucked up personality that would be marcie: lord have mercy china: Especially if it's anything like us Vanyel: sounds like a movie opportunity to me Cyrano: I hope space aliens aren't reading my archived diatribes wob: no shit van wob: thats what iw as thinking wob: how do i capitalize on that idea china: can you imagine? A bastardization of Slay, wob, van, and cyrano marcie shudders Vanyel: ed wood would direct it if he was alive today Cyrano: you forgot Kibo china: with the general pissiness of marcie and me wob: please, don't do that Vanyel: IT CAME FROM THE INTERNET marcie: ahahahahahahaha Cyrano: lol marcie: F33R IT!!@#! wob: may god help us all there china: w3rd wob: but wob: it would make money marcie: oh yes wob: CAN I BE A SELLOUT? marcie: yes it would wob: heh Cyrano: with our luck all the intelligence would know how to do would be to say "Me too!" Vanyel: no Vanyel: all it would be able to say Vanyel: was Vanyel: "ass." marcie snickers Cyrano: aheh Cyrano: funny china: bahahaha -- IT CAME FROM THE INTERNET! Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2002 %% Kestrel: I can't believe it's not ass butter -- Kestrel the quotable Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2002 %% Cyrano: oh wow Cyrano: IRIX finally supports Xinerama as of 6.5.11 wob: woopdeedoo! Cyrano: oh Cyrano: and SunOS 3.5 is up for download now wob: uhm that's wonderful i suppose Cyrano: nostalgia just isn't what it used to be wob: yep -- Cyrano sighing for the old days Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2002 %% Kestrel: you mentioned 60lbs of meat, I missed the details Vanyel: i unzipped. -- Vanyel amusing the masses Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2002 %% K: my woman is hangin out with her ex boyfriend tonight traci: wooo what's up with that K? K: they're friends now Jake: go put the smack down K K: oh i don't care Vanyel: are they fucking friends? K: i've seen him :) Jake: LIES Jake: SINNING LIAR Vanyel: is she bouncing on top of him right about now? K: if she wants that dude, i don't need her K: nah man Vanyel: oh Jake: think she lets him take the back door? DontKnow: she's realized that her ex isn't such a bad person after all--cause she found somebody worse. -- DOH! Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2002 %% *** traci has entered room 'Main' traci: ggggggggggoodmorning! traci: or not *** traci has left the room -- traci the excitable one Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 January 2002 %% wob: hydroponics has been done for a long time now, before it became popular to grow weed with Manuka: hell, they been doing tomatoes with it for eons wob: ya Manuka: they need to cross-breed 'em :) Manuka: p0tomato wob: heh, im sure some stoner has tried ;) Manuka: hey, it worked for oranges Kestrel: I did not wob: "duod what if i could eat an orange and get stoned!" Kestrel: you can't prove it either wob: hehe Kestrel: I married a biologist PURELY for love, not for DNA/cloning experience marcie: lies marcie: all lies -- Kestrel trying to convince us Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 January 2002 %% Vanyel: god only knows what they are actually gonna DO with redhat. wob: all aol services will now run on linux wob: i gotta make fun of cerbie if he comes in here Vanyel: maybe they jjust wanted a copy and were frustrated that they couldnt downlpoad -- Van, on AOL buying Redhat Linux Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 January 2002 %% Kestrel: MEDIC!! marcie gives kestrel violent, passionate CPR Kestrel: damnit... I burt mah tung Kestrel: WHOO Vanyel: i leave for 2 mins and jeez wob: how'd you burn your tongue? Kestrel: testing a HV battery Kestrel: it's ok wob: haha Kestrel makes note to self, for voltages >50, use a meter wob: HAHAHAH -- Kes being responsible Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 January 2002 %% Kestrel: Montel and Masturbation is not "a job" meg wob: hahaha marcie: that's all you know marcie: i pay her damn good money for that webcam -- meg working hard for da money Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 January 2002 %% aaron: this is a place to meet peopl Kestrel: good luck nimrod Vanyel: this is a place to fuck newbies up the ass with broomsticks aaron: hey, what software are you guys using? Kestrel: goodtimes.vbp, download it off the net Vanyel: we're using your linux box aaron: thanks *Vanyel* OOOOOOH AQUAMAN: goodtimes, badtimes, you know we had our share... AQUAMAN hums Vanyel> well... he asked for it! learn or die around here! *Vanyel* awesome aaron: I'm using that old Telnet aaron: I think it's pratical, though Kestrel: if you like telnet, you'll love goodtimes aaron: where do I get this? Kestrel: I'm not doing your homework junior, search and you will find it Kestrel: or go to the alt.2600 newsgroup and ask for it -- the krewe initiating a newbie Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 January 2002 %% Moni: moist Moni: suculant Xi: did they make you want to have sex with leo? Lia: so what do you do to the brownies? Moni: dripping Moni: chocoalte Moni: xi..yes Vanyel grins Xi: excellent! Xi: that's a new porn site waiting to happen Lia: HAHAHAHAHA marcie: you bet it is -- sexbrownies.com! Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 January 2002 %% marcie falls over marcie: *thunk* Xi: damnit Xi: marcie's are hard to come by nowadays Xi: how are we gonna replace her? marcie: you're damn right Jake: mmm check e-bay? -- Jake being thrifty Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 January 2002 %% Xi: man, that meeting went from 60 to stupid in under 10 words -- Xi at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 January 2002 %% Moni: I have a grease addiction Marianne: i do too lately marcie: i have a sugar addiction marcie: let's do group therapy Moni: I'll bring the donuts -- Moni in recovery Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 February 2002 %% Vanyel: and I got stuff in the mail today wob: anthrax? -- wob the patriotic American Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 February 2002 %% wob: i need every ounce of energy to battle the onslaught of stupidity that monday brings Kestrel: it builds up over the weekends you get get that tidal wave of stupid effect on mondays wob: exactly wob: the "thundering herd of stupidity" syndrome Kestrel: why have stupid by the pound when on mondays you can have stupid by the ton wob: damn right wob: just picture a bunch of auggie chix running at you full bore Kestrel: stupid concentrations so great they have their own gravity field wob: hahahaha wob: stupidity works just like gravity, it attracts to itself Kestrel: yep wob: eventually gathering enough momentum to suck the non-stupid into their folds -- wob the tired warrior Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 February 2002 %% Cyrano: I love network outages Cyrano: our telecom guys couldn't route themselves out of a room if the gateway was printed on the door -- Cyrano, irritated Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2002 %% Vanyel: BLOODY Vanyel: BLOOD Vanyel: GUSHING Lia: maggots Vanyel: OUT OF LUSERS HEAAAADS DontKnow: lia needs blood Vanyel: CHEESE MAGGOTS Lia: CHEESE SKIPPER MAGGOTS Vanyel: CHEESE DANISH MAGGOTS Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Vanyel: AND A COFFEE! DontKnow: yes, blood from dead lusers. Vanyel: AT MCDONAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALDS Vanyel twitches Vanyel: god i'm hungry now -- a disturbing rant Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2002 %% Kestrel: I have enjoyed both democrat and republican nipples Kestrel: and independant and libertarian for that matter Kestrel: no communist nipples... I think that girl I met in the closet at a halloween party in 1983 might have been socialist Cyrano: aheh Kestrel: she was furry enough Kestrel: I can highly recommend stoned sex with a furry college coed in a closet Kestrel: todays flashback was brought to you by the nice farmers in central mexico -- Kestrel on politics Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 February 2002 %% wob: my other computer is YOUR LINUX BOX -- wob the haxx0r Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2002 %% T: I guess I should go get the puppy. T: he's in the other end of the house. T: mom's got this 1/2 chiuahuah 1/2 weiner dog puppy. T: 6 weeks old. T: he's a cutie. marcie: yapdog. T: have to NOT step on him. marcie: have you decided what bbq sauce to use with him yet? -- marcie, who doesn't like yapdogs Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2002 %% Cyrano: a chicken mole enchilada, a bottle of tabasco, and thou... -- Cyrano waxing romantic Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2002 %% marcie: DETACHABLE PENIS marcie: god i hate you leo. marcie: now i'm going to have this song in my head FOR THE REST OF THE DAY wob: HOT BUTTED wob: CHECK IT AND SEE marcie: hahahahaha marcie: you asshole wob! wob: I GOT A BUTTHOLE OF ONE HUNDRED AND THREE wob: its all leo's fault and you know it :P marcie: well marcie: yes wob: CMON BUTTHOLE YOU CAN DO MORE THAN THAT *** Jake has entered room 'Main' wob: IM HOT BUTTED IM HOT B UTTED marcie shudders wob: awesome. -- the return of the dreaded HOT BUTT Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2002 %% Slayer: does displaying a gay pride item mean you're (supposedly) gay or is it common for straight people (or those twisted so deeply that it defies labeling) to do so? marcie: if you're actively supportive, i suppose it's not that uncommon Slayer: does wanting to shag lesbians count as 'actively supportive'? marcie: no. -- Slayer being supportive Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2002 %% Moni shares the love marcie: oooh marcie: come with me, little girl marcie drags moni into the server room Moni: you just like how my nipples get hard in the chill of the server room marcie: duh Moni: heh Cyrano: I knew those floor tile suction cups had more uses Moni: rofl marcie: hee Cyrano: *shpop* Kestrel: SNORK Kestrel: pervs marcie: yes marcie: and? Kestrel: I love you one and all Kestrel: except slay, loving him involves multiple penetrations of things I'm saving for someone special -- feel the love! Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2002 %% Moni: I think Jamez has well surpased me in the kinky department Kestrel: you have no idea -- Kestrel with special knowledge Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2002 %% Moni: for me..it would take a trip to Fiji Cyrano: fiji? Moni: yes Moni: nice warm tropical island with friendly natives Moni: and fruity rum drinks marcie: and a fruity houseboy to server you the drinks marcie: -r Moni: oh yes Moni: fruity houseboy wearing a grass skirt and a coconut bra marcie: hahahaha marcie: yeah! IG_atwrk: to service you? marcie: naw marcie: you get the hula girls for that ;) Moni> hee! Moni: bring me rum drinks and clean my house ed: heheheh Moni: mmm..naked hula girls giving me a massage with coconut oil Moni> and with any luck, he'd have a torrid sexual affair with the pool boy *Moni* YES! -- Moni and marcie making plans Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2002 %% Kestrel: I am deeply saddened I missed K Kestrel: has he married yet? Kestrel: has he been issued his Official Witless Majik Underwear? cuinhell: hahahhaha Kestrel: these questions trouble me, I need answers -- Kestrel the questioning Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 March 2002 %% Slayer: well, if you do anything too much it's bad for you Slayer: except maybe jerk off... i hope -- Slayer, worried Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 March 2002 %% Slayer: i may not be good at a lot of things, but i'm an expert at playing with my own penis -- Slayer the competent Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 March 2002 %% Al: because slay declared that it's impossible that I have ever had, or will ever have, sex. china: like slay would know marcie: *SNORK* marcie: add another keyboard to the list of the ones you owe me, Nancy -- China scores one Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 March 2002 %% Al: she isn't very attractive but her cleavage is talking to me -- Al on some chick Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 March 2002 %% Romantic: hi marcie... hows it goin? taco: rommie! Romantic: hi Em!:) marcie: i am drinking leftover beer marcie: from the house beer fridge marcie: it's a dirty job, but someone has to do it DontKnow: left over beer ? left over from what? marcie: various single beers, abandoned by their six-pakcs marcie: it's sad really marcie: i'm douing them a favor by drinking them marcie: putting them out of htier loneliness and all that taco: marcie the crusader marcie: thats me -- marcie, quite drunk indeed Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2002 %% cuinhell: janet reno is sexy Xi: in a muskox kinda way -- Xi the sane Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2002 %% marcie: well, *i'm* worried about cuin marcie: anyone who finds janet reno attractice has problems taco: It's Pat is the only other in Janet Reno's species cuinhell: i just want to be able to win the "weirdest thing you've fucked" contest every time -- cuinhell being adventurous Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2002 %% Xi: no-one wants a bored liver Xi: otherwise it would be called a boreder -- Xi talking about.... something Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2002 %% Xi: that spineless sphincter popper is still employed cuinhell: of course, he's useless Vanyel: assless. Vanyel: OH MY GOD HES ASSLESS! Vanyel: HOW THEREVER DOES HE SHIT? cuinhell: orally Xi: In an effort to accomodate more passengers, airlines are asking people to come to the gates assless. cuinhell: bwahah Xi: may I store your ass in the overhead compartment sir? cuinhell: i have no ass, that's my wife! Vanyel: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Vanyel: Ao uck Vanyel: my laptop is all liquroed up now Xi: in the event of depressurization, an oxygen mask and your ass will drop from the ceiling above you cuinhell: cool Xi: drunktop cuinhell: please be sure you place the mask over your face and not your ass Xi: hopefully its pre-digested drunkness Vanyel: pre digeted ASSnes Vanyel: sdlkfhjsa;fhsdahdsakhsdaghsdklhsadfl Xi: In the event of a water landing, please kiss your ass goodbye as it will float and you won't. cuinhell: most ass products are post digestion Vanyel: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Xi: LLS IN THE SKIY KEEP ON TURNIN cuinhell: please refrain from using other passengers asses as pillows Vanyel: ASS IN THE SKY KEEP ON SHITTIN! cuinhell: delta, we love to fly ass Xi: should your ass become lost during the flight, please report it to security immediately. Vanyel: PLOP PLOP LPOP PLOP LOP Xi: cuz at delta, we loves us some flyin' cuinhell: inserting objects in your ass while in flight is strictly forbidden Vanyel: SHITty hshitty BANG BAn f awe LOVE YOU! Vanyel: aHAHAHahpsdflkasdh; Vanyel: WHAT ABOUT TEH piLOPTS ASS? marcie: god you are so weird Vanyel: ASS JOYSTICKS cuinhell: shitty shitty bleep bleep Xi: Small electronic devices, including those in your ass, may not be used at any time during the flight. cuinhell: should your ass wish to shit, please escort it to the restroom personally. Vanyel: I LOVE to yOU S GUYS! Vanyel: SO DFUNy Xi: sharing of asses is strictly forbidden. marcie quietly records in the enquotes file Vanyel: FOO-KNEE Vanyel: oh shit cuinhell: stuffing the inflight meal directly into your ass has been found to be slightly more pleasant than actually eating it DontKnow: please stow your ass either in the seat in front of you or else in the overhead bin above you. cuinhell: please do not pinch the stewardesses asses, they won't be touching yours Xi: ladies and gentlemen this concludes our flight. please return your asses and tray tables to their full upTIGHT positions. cuinhell: if you have a hairy ass, we ask that you pluck out any dingleberries before stowing them Xi: this is for the safety of otehr asses that may be stored in the same location. Vanyel: ASS CATCHER cuinhell: those with hugeass syndrome are asked to check their asses at the gate -- ASS! Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2002 %% ed: ew ed: my last turd had a routing problem ed: it was a mangled packet (MTU's too large) ed: I had to fragment it to get it to the endpoint marcie: you are so weird -- ed and his bowels Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2002 %% Vanyel: marcie Vanyel: you know i love you Vanyel: but each time you say "hee" i want to smack you with a frying pan china: what do you want from her? marcie: yeah yeah marcie: i'm a girl marcie: sue me ;) Vanyel: i'll just get the frying pan marcie: as long as i get to hit you with a sautee pan Vanyel: how about a wok? marcie: stockpot? china breaks out the Dutch Oven marcie: put it over your head and pound it with a wooden spoon, like a bugs bunny cartoon? Vanyel: if oyu;re gonna hit me with one of those, then i'm gonna hit you with one of those entre tables marcie: hey, that rhymed Vanyel: c0omplete wiht the burning sterno marcie: ooh, you tease marcie: and i'll take you out witha matched set of flatware! Vanyel: ooh. marcie: i do not know how we get into these conversations. Vanyel: i shall bring you down with a rain of shish kabob thingies Vanyel: shish kabob kabobers? Vanyel: YOU KABOBER! china: kaboober! marcie: hehehe marcie: kaboober. Vanyel: mmm. Vanyel: kaboobs. Vanyel: with erect kanipples marcie: i'm going home. marcie: to play with my kanipples. marcie: ;) Al gets concerned and hides behind a row of colanders, quickly sharpening the nearest spatula Vanyel: i love it when kaboobs bob up and down on women kajoggers china: *snork* Al: khooray for kaboobies? marcie: and this is how shit gets started on EN. Vanyel: god i'm so easily amused *** Vanyel has left the room *** Vanyel has entered room 'Main' *** *** Vanyel (Hooray for Kaboobies): *** Logged in from nurgle.net since Tue Mar 5 13:02:51 2002 Vanyel: i am so easily amused. marcie: *** *** Vanyel (Hooray for Kaboobies): marcie: you truly are china: was it kagood for kayou? marcie: snork marcie: this is going to confuse the shit out of k marcie: i can't wait china: Ahahahahhaahahha! Vanyel: AHAHHaskjfhdslkfsdhafskdahasdg Vanyel: there goes my keyboard -- culinary delights on EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2002 %% Cyrano: I think the lack of exploits is more a lack of effort than anything else -- Cyrano on Tru64 Unix Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2002 %% Cyrano: if you go up to a random woman on the street and stick your tongue in her mouth, 7 out of 10 will slap you, 2 will glare and walk away, and the last will take you back to her place wob: hahaha Vanyel: ahahah Cyrano: how many women do you have to do that to to have a 50% odd of success? Vanyel: you know wob: YOU TELL US Vanyel: I did a problem like this back in statistics in HS Vanyel: but i failed that class. china: depends on whether or not one of those 7 out of 10 shoots you instead of slaps you marcie: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA -- China skewing the figures Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2002 %% Slayer: i will now eat a twinkie ... Slayer: never read the ingrediants on a twinkie Slayer: cake + cream shouldn't have that many unpronouncible things in it -- Slayer learning about nutrition Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 March 2002 %% Xi: i must find a way to make a speakerphone explode when its turned on -- Xi plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2002 %% *** Sarge has left the room *** Vanyel has left the room Xi: oh look, the boys are going to mate marcie: woop marcie gets the camera *** Cyrano has entered room 'Main' Xi: which do you figure is the top? -- Xi wondering Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2002 %% IGadget: it sure is quiet arround here marcie: i'm playing with enlightenment IGadget: then someoe is supposed to say "yeah, too quiet." then something bad is supposed to happen cuinhell: i'm too bored to be entertaining marcie: like k shows up cuinhell: hahhaa cuinhell: at least that's entertainment cuinhell: sad and pathetic, but entertainment nonetheless marcie: indeed -- bored geeks Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 March 2002 %% saundo: you mention sex, krispy kremes and the Duchess of York and THIS happens. Al: oye -- saundo and donuts Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 March 2002 %% ed: SECURITY is FOR THE WEAK -- ed making a proclamation Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% cuinhell: ass. querk: hole Xi: licker querk: freak -- querk with an accurate judgment Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% marcie: okay goddammit, what am i doing wrong marcie: i modified auto_direct and auto_master to automount this NFS directory marcie: restarted automountd Kestrel: ignore the "insert tab A in slot B" portion of the instructions, they are irrelevant to you marcie: and still can't get it to automount marcie: heheh Kestrel: ;) china: yeah, only the tongue-and-groove instructions apply to us -- groovy, baby! Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% Vanyel: i know! Vanyel: I wanna patent ignorance and stupidity! marcie: microsoft already did that, van Kestrel: snork -- Vanyel with an idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% cuinhell: warning: objects in your rear are smaller than they feel -- cuinhell with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% saundo: and the tasers saundo: remember the tasers Vanyel: the TAZER! saundo: applied across the testicles or nipples. cuinhell: nipsticles marcie: your sex life must be insane. -- saundo bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% cuinhell: COW BONCH IS GOOD EATS -- mmm. Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% cuinhell: i must go make pee pee, any fondling requests? saundo: yes saundo: milla jovovich Xi: cheesegrater -- Xi fueling cuinhell's fantasies Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% cuinhell: i touched her hoohoos -- huh, huh... did cuinhell just score? Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% DontKnow sneezes violently *** Crazy has left the room *** Darkness has entered room 'Main' DontKnow: gah. I sneeze and a good guy leaves and a loser enters. Vanyel: SNORK rayray: lol marcie: ahahahahahha Vanyel sneezes violently Darkness: bite me marcie: don't worry marcie: no k -- the powers of DK! Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2002 %% Xi: pardon me while i invent a new language where i leave off the ends of words -- Xi falling over himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2002 %% cuinhell: eat soemthing Moni: heh Moni sharpens her teeth cuinhell: NO! -- cuinhell frightened Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2002 %% Vanyel: why did you let qwest in your colon? -- Vanyel of the inquiring mind Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2002 %% Courtney: I AM THE MASTER OF THE CLIT -- yeah! Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2002 %% Courtney: i can heat my own house Courtney: it smells like a wet turd Courtney: but its warm -- Courtho on her farts Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2002 %% Moni: GF keeps teling me to go to Temple and pray marcie: mmm ice cream Moni: I'm like..FUck That Moni: gimmie Krispy Kremes marcie: i hear ya saundo: ahahahaha marcie: hahahahah saundo: religion loses to donuts marcie: now THATS therapy! Vanyel: YEAH! saundo: Right. On. -- the heretics of EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2002 %% Courtney: i thinkmy vibrator fell out of my bag and into my car Courtney: and i just had 3 ppl in there Vanyel: just straddle teh gearshipf then -- Vanyel with relationship advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2002 %% ed beats slayer with a large stick Xi: awwww. that's how he says he loves ya -- ed's strange mating rituals Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 March 2002 %% Kestrel: you add class to the place meg: heh meg: i dont have class what are you talking about Kestrel: deny it all you want Jake: low class is still class -- Jake complimenting meg Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 March 2002 %% saundo: punk marcie: PUNK marcie: BIZATCHASSPUNKWHORE marcie: wow saundo: yes marcie marcie: i impress myself saundo: flonk cuinhell: f.l.o.n.k. saundo: the man from f.l.o.n.k. marcie: hahahah marcie: saundo, yer funny marcie: FUNNY SAUNDO marcie: FUNNY FUNNY BOY saundo: uh oh saundo: you've been drinking, haven't you marcie: who marcie: me? marcie: would i do such a thing? saundo: emporia isn't that BAD marcie: innocent little marcie? saundo: ahahahaha saundo snorques Vanyel: ass. saundo: "innocent" marcie blinks and tries to look sober Vanyel: DRUNK BITCH marcie belches instead marcie: ewps. marcie: YES saundo: ladies and gentlemen of the jury, i offer up the words "innocent" "marcie" for your consideration marcie: DRUNK BITCH marcie: man saundo: and demand that you find her guilty of being drunk as a skunk marcie: life is so much better now that i've left xianity marcie: ;) marcie: DRUNK marcie: YOU ACCUSE ME OF BEING DRUNK saundo: YES marcie: YOU BIG LIAR Vanyel: i'd love to get drunk saundo: and? marcie: I AM STONE SOBER Vanyel: if I didnt have to beat the FUCKING SHIT OUT OF MY CAR TOMORROW saundo: psst. your caps lock is on. marcie: LIES LIES LIES marcie: hi. marcie: sorry marcie: something came over me saundo: ahahahahah saundo: let me prescribe some medicinal vodka to cure that marcie: YEAH saundo: remember, mix it with your favorite lager for best effects marcie: medicinal. marcie: yeah. marcie: i'll have to remember that. saundo: write it down. marcie: oh yeah marcie: pen marcie: paper marcie: errr, wait saundo: no wait marcie: i'm at a computer. marcie: DUH saundo: don't do that saundo: you WILL hurt yourself marcie: probabluy marcie squintws marcie: okay i got it saundo: either that or you'll end up writing "yip yip yip yip yip" endlessly marcie: erm marcie: what was it again? saundo: "i am a drunken sot, and I don't care" marcie: OH YEAH marcie: got it saundo: "i drink all night and I drink all day" marcie: IM A DRUNKEN SOT AN IM OKY marcie: OIKAY marcie: OKAY cuinhell: hahahaha saundo: ahahahahahah Vanyel: BITCHES marcie: yes Vanyel: BI Vanyel: TC Vanyel: HE Vanyel: S marcie: WH marcie: OR marcie: E Vanyel: BITCHES KNOW ME CUZ THEY KNOW THAT I CAN ROCK saundo: who rocks? Vanyel: mindless self indulgence. Vanyel: /export/mp3/Rap/Mindless Self Indulgance - Bitches.mp3 marcie: Jo: (Catching up) Blair, if we are to get along for the rest of this holiday, there will be no more sucking of my knuckles in public, is that understood? marcie: Blair: Killjoy saundo: ahahahaha marcie: god i LOVE THE NET!!@#!! Vanyel: netNETnetNETnetNETnetNETnetNETnetNET marcie: i can indulge m y every sick and twisted 80s sitcom fantasy!@#$!@ -- marcie, slightly inebriated Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 March 2002 %% Vanyel: ok Vanyel: whats the best way to mail a bottle Vanyel: apparently fedex wont take liquids marcie: DRINK IT -- marcie, helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 March 2002 %% Slayer: does anybody want to know the secret to good bbq sauce? cuinhell: sex. Slayer: ok, the other secret -- Slayer sharing his secrets Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 March 2002 %% marcie: i just ate my first date marcie: are you excited? Vanyel: rofl -- marcie sharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 March 2002 %% Sarge: ok according to the pgp site at MIT, I'm not in north america.... Slayer: pinko commie bastard Sarge: bastards... Sarge: ok where else can I get pgp, they might actually believe I'm in north america Cyrano: not from me, you foreign cryptoterrorist cuinhell: HAHAHHAA -- Sarge the Republican white terrorist Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% Xi: HOLDINK STILL LEETLE MONKEY -- Xi being disturbing Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% Cyrano: dangit Cyrano: bribes are no longer deductible -- Cyrano doing his taxes Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% Slayer: er, excuse me? Slayer: if she's a god, what am i? The Omipresence? Kestrel: you would be something from the bowels of hell I reckon Slayer: hrm Kestrel: I say that in the nicest way Slayer: i'll settle for that -- Slayer's from hell! Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% saundo: select fuck.method from fuck.table where kink = midgets ORDER BY dollar_amount; -- saundo going slightly mad from SQL Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% saundo: DIE TABLE DIE Moni: its almost national masturbation month marcie: yeah! Moni: ma i need to practice saundo: it isn't already? saundo: dammit saundo: all that for nothing! -- saundo, frustrated Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% Al: dammit OW Al: I did something stupid Moni: pay me damit Vanyel: al, if it hurts, you're doing it wrong Al: hurt my thumb with a thing saundo: ok, al, do not do it with 3-phase. -- saundo with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% Al: I wonder Al: if we cloned slay Vanyel: NO Vanyel: STOP Al: and handcuffed him to his clone Vanyel: RIGHT Vanyel: THERE Moni: arugh! marcie: ugh Al: would he annoy himself? Vanyel: finishing that thought might be considered war crimes in some countries -- Vanyel with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% Moni: my cat just ate my fortune cookie Moni: i have no more future -- Moni and her pussy Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2002 %% saundo: "I know my children aren't adminning NT, because I ASK. Parents, the anti-M$" -- saundo with a public service announcement Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 March 2002 %% saundafk: cuinhell: Florence Henderson is HOT. I mean HOT. I would so fuck her in an saundafk: instant. Her and Barbara Eden, in a twisted geriatric fantasy saundafk: threesome. saundafk: you sick weirdo *** saundafk is now known as saundo china: cu, at least you justify my weird desires saundo: ahahahaha -- china and her sickness Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 March 2002 %% cuinhell: FUCKING CANADIANS! *** Courtney has been disconnected cuinhell: oops -- cuinhell fucking the resident Canadian Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2002 %% cuinhell: all penises are EVIL -- cuinhell declaring himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2002 %% *** Lia has entered room 'Main' cuinhell: lia Slayer: reminds me of a joke Lia: gee thanks -- Lia getting her feelings hurt Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2002 %% Vanyel: I think it should be mandatory in order to play [EverQuest] Vanyel: if you play more than 8 hours a day, it should be part of the license agreement to kill yourself cuinhell: hahahhaha marcie: hear hear cuinhell: um, wait no Mic: EQ has been pissing me off...raised prices cuinhell: i was unemployed :P marcie: all the more reason Lia: not anymore? Vanyel: well, i'll make na exception for you cuz youre not a total loser cuinhell: hahah Vanyel: but still cuinhell: don't give me that much credit Vanyel: i sait TOTAL loser marcie: hahahah Vanyel: you're still a loser cuinhell: OH YEAH! -- Vanyel and cuinhell Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2002 %% Vanyel: I once had a dream that my pager was going, "You've got down servers!" -- Vanyel the AOL sysadmin Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2002 %% marcie: bah marcie: calling luser marcie: HaRharAHrHAR marcie: h0h0h0h0h0h0h0 marcie: "oh, someone already called me and showed me how to do ftp, but now i'm having another problem" marcie: "and what's that? marcie: "when i try to compile a program, it doesn't work" marcie: "okay, what do you have on your screen" marcie: "eff, ,tee, pee and a greater than sign" marcie: "okay, you need to type 'bye' to quit ftp" marcie: ... marcie: "my window went away!" marcie: "??" marcie: "now i'm out of clem completely!" DontKnow: ahh. cause she typed in ftp from start->run marcie: *thunk* "okay, you have to TELNET IN to clem now, not ftp. you can't compile anything from ftp. you have to be actually logged in." marcie: "oh!" Kesticle: be gentle Kesticle: not all can shine with your brilliance marcie: "oh, that works now! you're a lifesaver!" marcie: "just doing my job..." Kesticle: see? marcie: ugh. DontKnow: is this person a student or teacher? Kesticle: come on now... all of you admin types admit it, you enjoy helping the handicapped on some level marcie: faculty or staff, i don't know which marcie: not THAT handicapped :P Kesticle: hahahahah -- marcie dealing with handicapped lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2002 %% Vanyel: ass *** Darkness has entered room 'Main' Vanyel: woah Vanyel: i gotta be more careful with that. -- Vanyel summoning evil powers Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2002 %% sirsyko: wow sirsyko: I've never seen cyrano talk so raunchy. never have I seen him discuss so racy a topic cuinhell: hey syko Kestrel: you've missed much that ss Kestrel: he is as nasty as you wanna be cuinhell: nastier at times Kestrel: AND, he can do it at any voltage, frequency or molar strength you want -- Cyrano being admired Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2002 %% Kestrel: methamphetamine is not "cold medicene" -- Kestrel with medical advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2002 %% marcie: ahhh marcie: cyn just called me squealing all girl-like marcie: her flowers got delivered Vanyel: ahaha Manuka: woo! Vanyel: awesome marcie descends into the warm fuzzy glow of a job well done marcie: ahem marcie: back to your regularly scheduled mudfest marcie: KES YOU BASTARD! marcie: that's better. -- marcie regaining her manhood Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2002 %% Moni: I sent flowers to Nicole once..she didn't get the point. "Why are you sending me something that is 1/2 way dead?" marcie: ahahahah marcie: that figures :) sunbeam: i never thought of it that way before Moni: ya..rather typical *grin8 Vanyel: BECAUSE I LOE YOU YOU INSENSATIVE CUNT! marcie: HAHHAHAHAHAHAH Vanyel: JESUS marcie: YEAH -- Vanyel with relationship counseling Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2002 %% dweez: gimme some cuinhell: ok, bend over and lube up dweez: already done dweez: you should know me better, cu cuinhell: *THEEEEERUST* *** Xi has left the room cuinhell: oops, i must have missed dweez -- cuinhell misfiring Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2002 %% dweez has non-sex with marcie marcie: woop -- marcie, frantic with excitement Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2002 %% Slayer: i have foreign money cuinhell: and foreign objects in your rectum Slayer: can't you say anything nice? cuinhell: nope cuinhell: cunt Slayer: i love you, man -- Slay and cuinhell loving on each other Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% Vanyel: and the kernel shit is documented about as well as your butthole. Cyrano: yep ed: my anus has 1 HOWTO ed: top line says "EXIT" Vanyel: ahh but see Vanyel: if your butt was running linux ed: it'd go sidewaz Vanyel: you'd pass your lower intestine as well ed: sideways ed: yes ed: unless you edited a random flatfile and used a patch you found on a blog somewhere, purely by accident. Cyrano: oh god Cyrano: "HOWTO" docs ed: and then, 30 minutes later, you'd find wob wallowing around in your linux powered asshole, having hacked into it ed: he'd be fighting for peanuts with a bulgarian guy and a l33t skript kiddie coming to your ass from an @home ip address -- the geeks complaining about Linux Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% IGadget: I can stare down a cat marcie: liar marcie: nobody can stare down a cat Vanyel: YES IGadget: practice with a mirror and you get good marcie: heh *Vanyel* ok *NOW* i'm scared. elric: uh huh... didnt you ever see Monty Pythons 'Confuse-a-cat' ? IGadget: actually after staring for a while you can partialy close your eyes and they wil close them all the way Vanyel: dude. IGadget: probably out of bordom Vanyel> me too. Vanyel: you *REALLY* need to et a life -- IGadget and his immense boredom Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% Vanyel: did you do cowtipping? marcie: i didn't IGadget: once marcie: slay might have IGadget: went cow tiping Vanyel: slay was prolly tipped. Vanyel: what am I asking marcie: of course, he'd make hamburger out of any poor cow he tipped -- on attending high school in rural areas Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% Kestrel: I HAVE PENILE SHRINKAGE, I MUST LEAVE NOW -- Kestrel trying to get out of work Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% Xi: tongue stamina is important and a fine skill to acquire marcie: damn right Xi: i go now *** Xi is now known as xi-afk marcie: off to practice, one assumes Kestrel: no doubt -- Xi improving his oral skills Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% cuinhell: ass itchy cuinhell: NOW FINGER SMELL FUNNY -- cuinhell making a realization Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% taco: I am indeed a 2 bit whore, thanks Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: but you're my 2 bit whore marcie: that's so romantic -- Vanyel the romantic Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2002 %% cuinhell: finally, a source for quality midget pr0n -- cuinhell with his latest discovery Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 April 2002 %% *** Sarge has been disconnected *** Sarge has entered room 'Main' Sarge: note to self...do not step on power switch -- Sarge giving technical pointers Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 April 2002 %% marcie: ahahah marcie: cynthia just staggered into the computer room saundo: ahahahahah saundo: is she burdened or drunk? marcie: and said in this cute voice "too many carbs make cindy sleepy" saundo: ahahahahahahhahahaha marcie: and flumped into the bedroom saundo: wave a potato in front of her, she'll drop right off -- saundo with advice on sleeping Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 April 2002 %% ed: my niggaz ed: c'mon, lusers ed: Dynamic UP DATE ME ed: and fill my FW logs! ed: as I BLOCK YOU PUSSY UPDATES ed: WITH YOUR WINDOWS BOXEN LOOKIN FOR A FUCKING INTERNET-BASED AD SERVER ed: YOU FUCKING LUSERS -- ed on a righteous BOFH rant Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 2002 %% marcie: When she is logged into clem from home she can not edit unix marcie: commands. She said that Deloris Moralis can do this with her account. Her marcie: instructor said to call the helpdesk. marcie: goody. marcie: SHE CANNOT EDIT UNIX COMMANDS! marcie: i'm going to make this into a song Slayer: what? Slayer: i'm so confused marcie: along with "how to make /etc/defaultrouter file?" DontKnow: as in tcsh command line editing? *** xi-fewd is now known as Xi marcie: i have no idea marcie: probably means she typed 'dir' and it didn't work marcie: or something like that marcie: SHE CANNOT, SHE CANNOT, SHE CANNOT... EDIT! UNIX! COMMANDS! Vanyel: ahahah Vanyel: this is why I wish I could play guitar marcie: me too Vanyel: i've already got a guitar riff for that song Vanyel: in my head marcie: When she is logged into clem from home she can not edit unix marcie: commands. She said that Deloris Moralis can do this with her account. Her marcie: instructor said to call the helpdesk. marcie: YEAH marcie: CALL THE HELPDESK Xi: UNIX Punk songs [30 minutes later] Slayer: dammit joyr, dont you konw ANY single heterosexual girls to hook me up with Vanyel: rofl Sarge: slayer..maybe you'd have a chance with marcie's stupid user... Vanyel: OOOOOH! Vanyel: sarge, you're behind quota marcie: ahahaha -- marcie loving her lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Slayer kisses cyrano Slayer: i love you, man, i really do Cyrano: eeoich Slayer: fine then Slayer kisses cyrano's wife Cyrano: you might get more than you bargained for Slayer: i'm counting on it, lover Cyrano: she's a whiz with a meat cleaver -- Cyrano on his devoted wife Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% marcie: my new cat hunkers over his water bowl with his face in it marcie: not drinking any water, mind you Slayer: zip's just happen if you feed her and throw tinfoil balls for her marcie: just hanging out with the water bowl Slayer: happy i mean Slayer: heh Slayer: hanging out cuinhell: wr0d marcie: he's relatively normal except for little weird shit like that Slayer: the animal companions of g33ks are the most fucking odd animals in the world marcie: you know it -- cats and their people Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Vanyel: I just tought my coworkers how to play dreidel marcie: jewish missionary work! -- dreidel, dreidel, dreidel! Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Slayer: why in the fuck am i walking through the house, drunk, singing 'greensleeves' Slayer: i dont even know the words to it! -- Slayer amusing us all Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Slayer: i'm too drunk to convey the proper information Slayer: but i9'm nto too drunk to eat courtney out for an hour Vanyel: courtney red haired sexy goddess Slayer bitchslaps vanyel Courtney: I'm not drunk enough to let that happen -- Courtney fending off the admirers Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Vanyel: slay Vanyel: you are about to be personally responsible for turning courtney into a lesbian Slayer: shrug Slayer: van, that's cool Vanyel: NO ITS NOT! -- Vanyel trying to salvage another one Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Slayer: there are two types of peple in this world Slayer: those who will swallow a load of my hot stemay semen and those won won't Cerberus: 0%/100%? marcie: i'd say that narrows it down to *one* type of person Cerberus: werd. DontKnow: joy, right Slayer: hey, i've had at least one person swallow it, so there goes your theory marcie: damn. Slayer: both of you DontKnow: but would he swallow it again? -- DK asking the $6mil question Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Slayer: vanjel is a bad influ3nce on our kids Vanyel: if you only knew. -- Vanyel, the Axis of Evil(tm) Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2002 %% Slayer: i love everyone, all women whse names star with K, and everyone from another planet -- Slayer, quite drunk indeed Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: i'm a jerk w2ithout even doing anything -- Slay, still drunk Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: i love you too joyr marcie: lies marcie: you just want to watch me and china have sex while you jerk off marcie: THATS NOT THE SAME THING Slayer: i dont' know aht youy're saying but i feel i sould take offense -- Slay, drunk yet still Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: i shoujld slow down on my inbidnition of alcoholic beverages or i might become in danger of becmoming intoxicated -- Slay... yes, drunk Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: SHUT UP, I'M OFF IN SEARCH OF ICELANDIC PUSSY -- Slayer on a mission from God Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: why can't you just love me for whom i am IG_here: because Im not gay? -- Slayer looking for love Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: what the FCK Slayer: no fucking wepge should take fuckign 10 fuckng minute sto fucking load marcie: it's a pr0n site marcie: it's trying to find your penis Slayer: it's a fucking web dictionary marcie: fine, it's trying to look up "tww" -- Slayer bitching about the Web Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: jewsus fucking mohhamad -- Slayer getting religious Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Slayer: i refuckingfuse to believe that 3every god who's ever been thought us _plus_ every god who hasn't been thorugh of _plus_ ever non-theological answer ignored is against me -- Slayer getting religious, part 2 Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 April 2002 %% Courtney: oh Courtney: my Courtney: god Courtney: is she half beaver? -- Court on her ex-husband's new girlfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2002 %% Kes: no, he has himself into it I think, he's in a different state right now, you don't want to approach that kind of homely too fast, you could burn up on entry Vanyel: GODDAMNIT Vanyel: STOP BEING SO FUNNY Vanyel: too much soda is coming out my nose -- Kes on K's new girlfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2002 %% Lia: you say "chemistry weirdo" like it's a bad thing -- Lia being insulted Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2002 %% saundo: are you new here? have your forgotten with whom you are intercoursing with now? marcie: lia, it's pretty damn deep -- saundo and marcie, awww Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2002 %% marcie: I would just like to add here that I truly believe that it's impossible marcie: to find underwear to match the Troi Strapping Tape Bra. marcie: our own china! saundo: ahahaha saundo: well saundo: who needs underclothing anyway? marcie: exactly :) Kestrel: exactly saundo: i see how your mind goes. marcie: and this is news? Kestrel: damnit, I'm slow on the draw Lia: hi Kes saundo: no news DontKnow: hell, only super fat people need clothes at all. saundo: just a newsflash saundo: sort of a life magazine of marcie's lustings. marcie: that would be the quotes file! saundo: ahahahaha saundo: well yah -- a meta-reference! Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2002 %% DontKnow: leo, there's only a couple of net people I wnat. and all of them use EN. Jake blushes -- Jake, the blushing virgin Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2002 %% DontKnow wants to get pregnant. marcie: follow your dreams, dk DontKnow: only God could get me pregnant. marcie: THERES AN IDEA saundo: ahahahahha Lia: No comment saundo: darwin WAS wrong -- DontKnow having maternal instincts Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2002 %% Slayer: if i'm going to fuck a dead cow, it's going to at least be a whole cow -- Slayer setting his standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2002 %% Cyrano: FAT IS ONLY UGLY UNTIL YOU PUT A NIPPLE ON IT! -- Cyrano also setting standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2002 %% *Slayer* i dreamed yesterday that i deflouwerd a 15 year old Slayer> good for you *Slayer* i need to learn how to control my dreams Slayer> why *Slayer* so i can quit getting up to go look for hamburgers in the middle of deflowering 15 year olds -- Slayer and lucid dreaming Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 April 2002 %% ed: must get coffee and take this dump cuinhell: DUMP ed: I'm putting money that it'll look just like you, CU cuinhell: if it tries to bite you on the way down, then it probably does [a few minutes later...] ed: dammit ed: somebody beat me to the fucking shitter ed: I waited past this turds "Pewp by date" cuinhell: hahaha did you miss your shit window? ed: I'm really close. marcie: ahahahah, no shit cuin ed: thing is, I k now he's shitting too cuinhell: grunting and screaming? marcie: did he take the poop stall? ed: so, I'm gonna have to take a match in, or, let it cooloff for 15 minutes cuinhell: could just be masturbating with a cheese grater ed: and then I will definately miss the shit window cuinhell: i hate missing the shit window cuinhell: then your poops are off for at least a day and a half ed: that will make me unhappy. I can't concentrate with a fully developed 3rd tri-mester turd in my colon -- ed with very important things to do Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2002 %% Cyrano: there are always two Cyrano: a master Cyrano: and an apprentice Cyrano: unless you use cable select. -- Cyrano on hardware Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2002 %% Kestrel: oh holy mother of all that is evil -- Kestrel praying Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2002 %% cuinhell: i am so bored that even my boredom is bored -- cuinhell, bored Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2002 %% marcie: my goal is to be the world's first female drag queen -- follow your dreams! Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2002 %% IG_afk: sarge imageine NY is so stupid that you go though about 5 levels of menues and then you get told, sorry we are experienceing high call volumes please call back in 15 minutes IG_afk: no wonder the damn call center is in a secure facility because I want to bomb it now -- IGadget in a rage Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2002 %% Vanyel: fuck the fucking fuck of a fucking cirfuckcus -- Vanyel demonstrating vocabulary skills Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 April 2002 %% Kestrel: oops Kestrel: is it there? cuinhell: ask all the ladies that, don't you? Kestrel: absolutely *** cuinhell has been disconnected Kestrel: the tiny weiner of death claims another victim -- Kestrel flexing his muscles Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 April 2002 %% Slayer: i think i'm going to write up a "complete and utter fucking idiot's guide to cooking" Slayer: lesson 1: boiling water Xi: don't forget the ingredients list Slayer: lesson 2: toast. what it is and what it can do for you. -- Slayer making career plans Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% Slayer: my mom eating box would be sweet -- Slayer having lesbian fantasies Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% cuinhell: having mp3's in your ass will result in immediate diarration -- cuinhell with a health warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% Vanyel: check out a pt cruiser Courtney: eww Courtney: I hate those things Vanyel: really? Courtney: neons with a zz top exterior -- Courtney car shopping Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% Xi: hell's gonna rule with us there -- Xi on the afterlife Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% cuinhell: will we have to BBS in hell, or will we all be tossed in a room together as our REAL punishment ;) -- cuinhell on the afterlife Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% wob: there is almost nothing funnier then tipping a cow wob: until you tip the bull wob: then the funs over wob: thank god for barbed wire fence -- wob on entertainment in New Mexico Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% Slayer: go forth and be fruity -- Slayer giving commands from On High Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2002 %% *Manuka* oh, so anyway ... our roommate has aspirations of ebing a comic boko artist *Manuka* ..and I have aspirations of being a typist -- Manuka, aspiring to higher things Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2002 %% Xi: damnit. isp fell down and my vpn tunnel went with it Xi: today is DEFINITELY monday marcie: isp fall down go boom Xi starts invoking muses. Xi: please let there only be ONE monday this week marcie: you need all the help you can get, duod -- Xi summmoning help Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2002 %% *Manuka* andrea was looking for something the other day, mentioned it was probably in my office and irretrievably lost *Manuka* I immediately said "outer rim, third stratum" *Manuka* sure enough, there it was. *Manuka* something to be said for a geological filing system Manuka> HAHARhHARhARhahrHARHarAHrHARAR -- Manuka on his organization method Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2002 %% Cyrano: I now possess the tao of 2.4ghz -- Cyrano geeking out Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2002 %% saundo: http://www.somethingawful.com/cliff/ihateyou/page-201.htm marcie: saundo, you absolute BASTARD marcie: ugh saundo: ahahahahahah marcie: ugh ugh ugh saundo: I win! saundo: oh come on! marcie: i am not kidding, i screeched marcie: out loud marcie: ugh marcie: UGH Vanyel: AURJHkldfhsghaslgfsd Vanyel: noi1 Vanyel: hfashjfpoaiyufowepyhiopg Vanyel: must Vanyel: scrape saundo: that's what mila jovovich will look like :-) Vanyel: eyeballs saundo: AHAHAHAHAHAHAH marcie twitches saundo bows saundo: you're all so VERY WELCOME. marcie: i. hate. you. Courtney: hahahahahahaha Courtney: that one is rad saundo smewches marcie marcie: get off me. -- saundo being a rat bastard Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2002 %% ed: its time for "Name That Turd!" ed: it was sorta brown, no peanuts ed: and a bit soft ed: It wouldn't stop telling me about its problems, AND, it kept faking having a little turd girlfriend still in my colon ed: Who Was it! ed: *tick* *tock* *tick* *tock* ed: *bzzzzzzt* ed: It was K cuinhell: HAHAHAHHA -- ed playing "Name That Turd!" Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 April 2002 %% Kestrel: btw, I have been reviewing the quotes file, the wisdom of all humanity resides there -- Kestrel reaching Enlightenment Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 April 2002 %% sunbeam: me likey this cough syrup sunbeam: it'd be even better on the rocks -- sunbeam, sick Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 April 2002 %% Xi: maybe if i start a heroin habit now, by the time they actually fire me I can be so fucked by the drug that I'll never know or care -- Xi loving his job Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 April 2002 %% Slayer: i think i'm getting soft in my old age Slayer: the other day i was reading about some girl getting killed and i felt odd Slayer: some new emotion i've never felt before cuinhell: was she cute? Slayer: i believe someone suggested it may be "compassion" Slayer: i guess she was ok looking cuinhell: you wre just upset that you'd never get to fuck her. -- Slayer becoming a Sensitive Guy Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2002 %% Vanyel: oh youve gotta be kidding me. Vanyel: my dept wants to take all book sin posettion and put them in a centralized library Vanyel: how many different ways can I say "no fucking way" Xi: fear that Vanyel: posession Sarge: I was wondering what the fuck that word was Slayer: privately owned books or the ones you're borrowing from your company Vanyel: both Vanyel: i buy all my own books for just this reason. Slayer: tell them to let you know how your ballsac tastes -- Slayer giving Vanyel career guidance Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2002 %% Vanyel: THOU SHALT NOT LAG -- Vanyel giving commandments Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2002 %% Slayer: so i'm reading _the_universe_in_a_nutshell_ by stephen hawking Slayer: it's a really good book Slayer: i recommend it to those of you who are interested in cosmology who don't understand it Vanyel: yah it is Sarge: just as long as you don't make me listen to his lectures, you're fine Slayer: but every now and then stephen attempts to make a humorous comment Slayer: he just isn't funny Slayer: on the other hand, HE'S been in an episode of star trek, so who am i to comment -- Slayer, jealous Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2002 %% Slayer: heh, egypt, the house of bondage... make sit sound like a nightclub in san francisco Slayer: "Thou hast been delivered from the House of Bondage." "But it was ladies' night! Free drinks!" -- Slayer reading about Moses and the Hebrews Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2002 %% wob: 8 50mhz cpus OF POWER -- wob bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2002 %% dweez: wob - are you skilled @ sendmail? wob: when armed with a 6pack and a pizza, yes. -- wob qualifying his mad skillz Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 April 2002 %% Cyrano: who is the goddess of networking storms? Cyrano: I'm betting on cthulhu here saundo: arp-rodite -- ba boom CHING! Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 April 2002 %% saundo: "endangered species" is code for "good eating" -- saundo on culinary matters Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 April 2002 %% Vanyel: If you came up with a toilet that ran linux Vanyel: you'd get slashdot time Vanyel: then again marcie: LINUX TAKES THE BEST SHITS EVER! Cyrano: hm Vanyel: i'd love to find a linux toilet cuinhell: HAHAHAHAHAHA marcie: ther's a joke in there somewhere. Cyrano: you'd need a new command Vanyel: i could feed it exactly what it diserves cuinhell: too bad M$ has the shit market cornered already Cyrano: /sbin/dump is already taken marcie: i knew i could count on y'all -- the crew on Linux Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2002 %% cuinhell: gotta say I've never seen a vaginally inserted pineapple before -- OW! Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2002 %% wob: what's the difference between a ball gag and a pacifier Xi: prolly 30 bucks at the right store, wob wob: there you go -- wob looking to shut Sarge's kid up Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2002 %% marcie: blar. *** K has been disconnected marcie: hot damn. marcie: the power of blar compels you. -- marcie wielding her power Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2002 %% Jake: I once took a shit for an entire hour -- Jake bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2002 %% Vanyel: at least the netscreen gives an informative 404 message when it does that... Vanyel: ... which IE promptly hides with its super-friendly error messages. saundo: ahahahahah saundo: you are in a maze of crappy software, all of which sucks! saundo: a dart almost hits you!@ DontKnow: yeah, ie's error messages aren't worht much. at least netscape doesn't cover them up. Vanyel: saundo: you are in a maze of crappy software, all of which sucks! saundo: you hit at the invisible proxy! saundo: you miss the invisible proxy! saundo: the invisible proxy bites you! saundo: your ass hurts! saundo: you throw a malformed URL at the invisible proxy! saundo: you kill the invisible proxy! Vanyel: you get 404 experience points! -- Vanyel bitching about Netscape's proxy Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2002 %% Kestrel: live in your fucking suv Sarge: yeah right Kestrel: you dick Sarge: shut up bitch Kestrel: your wife loves sex in the suv, thats where I met her Kestrel: I thought it was you since it was dark but her bung was a lot less hairy Kestrel: tell me you love me Kestrel: TELL ME YOU LOVE ME Sarge: no that was my wife...she's has the dark hairy ass...mine is a blonde hairy ass Kestrel: AW CRAP Kestrel: I WAS RAPED Sarge: now YOU tell me you love me bitch! Kestrel: I... I..... Kestrel: I DO love you.... I really do.... Kestrel: So SWALLOW GODDAMNIT -- the lovefest Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 April 2002 %% marcie: Audrey in Admissions; reported that she is in the telnet Mars, and she is marcie: getting errors marcie: SHE IS IN THE TELNET MARS marcie: !!@#!! marcie: SHE IS GETTING ERRORS! marcie: IN THE TELNET MARS! marcie twitches Vanyel: damn marcie Cyrano: all your helpdesk are belong to us. Vanyel: ahahah marcie: and you can HAVE THEM ALL -- marcie working Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2002 %% marcie: i my noise cancelling headphones cuinhell: i luser cancelling blunt objects -- cuinhell feeling the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2002 %% Cyrano: I still think someone should make a "girls of the X10 ads" calendar -- Cyrano with a good idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2002 %% Vanyel: shes getting errors IN THE TELNET MARS! marcie: SHE CANNOT! SHE CANNOT! EDIT! UNIX! COMMANDS! Vanyel: *scratch scratch scratch* IGadget: the web is from venus , telnet is from mars Vanyel: ahahAHAHAH Vanyel: she doesnt know stty erase marcie: HAHAHAH marcie: i love you people Vanyel: she doesnt know how to use backspace Vanyel: she cannot edit her unix commands Vanyel: SHES GETTING ERRORS Vanyel: IN THE TELNET MARS! Al: stty ARSE Vanyel: WICKY WICKY WICKY marcie: *insert retro beatbox moment* cuinhell: hahahah -- Vanyel writing a song Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2002 %% cuinhell: take some no-doze Vanyel: dude, if I took no-doz i'd be up for 2 weeks straight cuinhell: cool cuinhell: THINK of the shit you'd come up with! Jake: it could involve flinging poo Jake: or midgets! cuinhell: being stark raving mad isn't that bad Jake: as long as you have comfortable shoes cuinhell: flinging poo AT middgets Vanyel: i'm stark raving naked, too cuinhell: ok dk marcie: ahahah Jake: a poo-routing rackmounted midget Vanyel: hey Vanyel: HEY Vanyel: TAKE THAT BACK cuinhell: no. Vanyel: that was uncalled for. cuinhell: dkdkdkdkdkdkdkdk Vanyel: you princess fucker marcie: dissed! cuinhell: poona porker! Vanyel: eeeeew cuinhell: the mere thought of princess flattens my weasel Vanyel: my work here is done. cuinhell: hah cuinhell: you weasel wilter marcie: i love you guys like a shameless slut cuinhell: awwwww, marcie, that almost brings a tear to my eye *sniffle* marcie: i gn0w -- the love! Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2002 %% Vanyel: take bak the DK comment or you'll never wank again *** vampchk has entered room 'Main' cuinhell: oh, i'll wank! cuinhell: ok van... cuinhell: slayer, naked and covered in a thick layer of butter marcie: goddamit jerod Vanyel: ooh! its a pork roast! marcie: now I'LL never wank again cuinhell: HHAHAHH! cuinhell: er cuinhell: sorry marcie marcie: liar cuinhell: ;) -- marcie all shriveled up Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2002 %% YaHoo: hey i am nice damnit -- Yahoo defending herself Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2002 %% cuinhell: in LA they landscape with DEAD HOOKERS AND BLOW -- cuinhell on California-style decorating Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2002 %% marcie: massive 14mm tww dweez: yes marcie: OH YEAH dweez: do not forget that dweez: i had a trasnplant dweez: i now have the carbon fibre pokey stick of doom marcie: ahahahahahahahHAHAHAHAHA -- tww of death! Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2002 %% dweez: i love you wob -- awww... Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2002 %% K: i don't fuck sheep K: but i've fucked a dog before -- K making true confessions Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 May 2002 %% Kestrel: THE KOREAN-JEWISH DEFAMATION LEAGUE BUGGERED ME -- Kestrel sensing a conspiracy Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 May 2002 %% Vanyel: i need a new windows box. mine died thi smorning IGadget: isnt that like: " I need a new hole in my head" ? Vanyel: nah Vanyel: holes in your head cost less. Vanyel: and are usually less painful. -- Vanyel undergoing torture Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 May 2002 %% Slayer: don't read too much into this, but where would one go to find mpegs of chicks in spandex giving head to horses while peeing on themselves? -- you can find anything on the Net! Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 May 2002 %% Slayer: it's like a guy can't jerk off to women raping tied up sheep without getting looked at oddly Kestrel: go figure -- Slayer and his preferences Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 May 2002 %% Slayer: need... fewer... sex... related... laws... -- Slayer having a hard time Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 May 2002 %% Kestrel: I have a deep desire to secure 2 chocolate doughnuts to moni's breats with strawberry preserves and make her dance for me Kestrel: is this wrong? -- Kestrel with a moral question Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 May 2002 %% Kestrel: iMax porn Kestrel: mmMMMmmm Kestrel: LOOK! A 60' LABIA! -- Kestrel with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 May 2002 %% Vanyel: marcie, you're so cute when you're being psychotic Vanyel: like a mad little teddy bear -- Vanyel with admiration Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 May 2002 %% Moni: sadism and therapy really aren't that far apart -- Moni the S&M domme/therapist Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 May 2002 %% Jake: SELL ME YOUR CHILDREN! -- Jake making demands Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 May 2002 %% Xi: ed's very limber cuinhell: apparently Xi: its good Xi: you will be in pain cuinhell: wr0d to your meat -- Xi with a recommendation Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 2002 %% ed: I'm less fun in real life. ed: my digital self is so much more fancy free ed: and my colon is overactive marcie: but i bet THATS entertaining -- ed being entertaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 2002 %% *** marcafk is now known as kmarcie kmarcie: erm *** kmarcie is now known as marcie cuinhell: removing old siebel, installing new marcie: blue light special at kmarcie! Xi: ick cuinhell: these are easy, they are merely web servers *** Sarge is now known as Srgsleep Cyrano: kmarcie. marcie, the KDE port. marcie: ahahahaha marcie: i LIKE it Xi: soon to be released, gmarcie and xmarcie ed: under which licence? Xi: BSD of course Jake: OpenMARCIE Cyrano admires her UI ed: simple, yet functional marcie shows off her GUI Xi whistles. ed: what are those two pointy knobs for? marcie: doubleclick them and find out! ed: where is the "button" at? Xi: oh look! i reset button! marcie: kmarcie is sleeker, better-looking and more functional than xmarcie! Vanyel: at least its not gmarcie ed: mahahahah marcie: i love you guys -- marcie being fawned over Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 2002 %% Slayer: fuck shit piss fuck shit piss fuck shit piss wob: excellent Vanyel: i wanna get that on mp3 Vanyel: I wanna make that the chineese lady's startup sound marcie snorks marcie: "HOT BUTTED! FUCK SHIT PISS FUCK SHIT PISS HOT BUTTED FUCK!" wob: HOT BUTTED wob: CHECK IT AND SEE wob: I GOT AN ASSHOLE OF ONE HUNDRED AND THREE -- the return of the dreaded HOT BUTTED! Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 2002 %% china: Man, there's nothing to put a damper on your masturbation fanatasies like your father coming home from work early -- hate it when that happens! Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 2002 %% Zorro: okay this is too much fun *** Zorro has left the room Kestrel: if you're vewwy vewwy quiet, they will frequently wander off on their own... Kestrel: when it's quiet, they can only hear the insane voices in their own heads... it send them in search of more distraction Kestrel: this analysis of lost auggie souls was brought to you by the fine young voices in MY head -- please get auggie back up! Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 May 2002 %% cuinhell: my dump took a lot longer than that this morning cuinhell: dump | lysol marcafk: nonono marcafk: dump > /dev/toilet | cat lysol *** marcafk is now known as marcie Vanyel: /dev/toilet: blocked device: call roto router cuinhell: gahahhahahhaha cuinhell: marcie, i nub j00 marcie bows -- marcie, who is the shit Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 May 2002 %% china: that wedding yesterday was LONG china: I'm all for quick weddings DontKnow has never been to a wedding. china: it shouldn't take an hour to say yuou're not going to be a jerk -- China with a point Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 May 2002 %% Lia: OUT, FOUL DEMONS OF ASS! marcie: hee Vanyel: SOMETHING's REAL BAD WRONG IN Y PANTS! -- let the twitching begin! Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 2002 %% Vanyel: whose weirder? Lia: me Cyrano: hm Cyrano: I'm disqualifying myself from voting Lia: hehehe Vanyel: oh come on Cyrano: esp considering what I just saw Cyrano: a jpeg of a woman wearing nothing but pastry marcie: awesome. Vanyel: WHERE Cyrano: now I'm hungry marcie: HAHHAHAHAHAHAHA -- Cyrano with a hunger Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 2002 %% Cyrano: the lifespan of a carpenter ant in week-old dr. pepper has so far proved to be 2 hours and still counting -- Cyrano doing an experiment Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 2002 %% Vanyel: marcie marcie: what Vanyel: i'm sending you on a quest. marcie: oh dear marcie: for a grrrrrrail? Lia: the grail? Vanyel: your quest is to find lia's ass Vanyel: AND BEAT IT! Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA marcie: hahahahahahAHAHAHAHAHHA -- marcie going on a journey Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 2002 %% Vanyel: there are some things I want no knowledge of. Cyrano: ah Vanyel: my sisters sex life is one of them. marcie: ahahahah Cyrano: see, I was still sharing a wall with one sister when she was having bf's visit her through her window Vanyel: AFAIK shes still a pure virgin marcie: oh dear Vanyel: ugh marcie: of course Cyrano: lemme tell you, that's a great sound just after you've broken up marcie: i shared a wall with my parents when i was a teenager marcie: and the less said about THAT, the better Vanyel: oh christ marcie: indeed Vanyel: no wonder you both are so odd -- Vanyel on relatives and sex Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2002 %% Xi: shittyshitty gangbang shittyshitty gangbang shittyshitty gangbang i snort glue -- Xi babbling Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2002 %% wob: THE STINK SMELLED OF FILTHY COMMIE -- goddamn hippie commies! Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2002 %% Xi: do not anger marcie as she will quickly replace you with high performance shell scripts and bubblegum -- damn right. Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2002 %% Barry: well I was just trying to be nice and say hi marcie: THIS IS EN ed: we aren't nice here. marcie: THERE IS NO BEING NICE ed: we're intolerant assholes Xi: yeah Xi: fuck nice marcie: and proud. Barry: ok ed: we spend most of our days being nice to people with the intelligence of microwaved sperm. -- O Eagle's Nest, our home and native land Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2002 %% Slayer: we are brought forth unto this world with nothing Slayer: and with nothing we depart Slayer: so i commend this body to the ground with nothing but memories Slayer: earth to earth Slayer: ashes to ashes Slayer: dust to dust Vanyel: ASSES to ASSES! Vanyel: BUTTS TO BUTTS~! *** xi-gone has been disconnected marcie: i love how you can ruin a tender moment with so little effort, van *** Xi has entered room 'Main' marcie: i'm in admiration Vanyel: :) -- marcie feeling warm and fuzzy Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2002 %% ed: I'll give you a fucking tender moment ed: where is that fucking luser ed: I'll cook that fucker like a turkey with this 3phase I have here. Xi: who you cookin now ed? ed: that peanuthead that was here earlier ed: I'm abusing him in absentia marcie: awesome ed: fuckin snivelling little shitpile of luser Xi: excellent -- ed, our hero Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2002 %% Cyrano: mad scientists just don't get the movie screen time they used to -- Cyrano complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 2002 %% Vanyel: They need to make a movie with Samuel L. Jackson as a Microsoft programmer just so I can hear the line. Vanyel: Send me that service pack. It's the one named, 'Dumbass Motherfucker' -- Vanyel with a good idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 2002 %% ed: fuck lusers ed: fuck lusers fuck lusers ed: fuck them all to fucking hell ed: fucking cocksucking oxygen wasting fuckhead lusers ed: everywhere I fucking look ed: a fucking luser ed: waiting to fucking punce ed: pounce ed: godDAM ed: I fucking hate them. ed: I hate them because I don't really know how to tell this one to fix his problem, other than "don't do it that way, dipshit." ed: or "rewrite your From: correctly, and your return-path" wob: fuck 'em wob: let them stay n00bz ed: "well I'm an admin, and there should be a way to opt out of such things." ed: This isn't a fucking democracy. ed: "Fuck you, opt out of your SLA and go the fuck somewhere else." ed: "what SLA, you say." ed: "Exactly" I say. ed: frckign cockbiting little wannabe lusers Jake: kill em all Jake: burn the evidence Jake: THE STREETS WILL FLOW WITH THE BLOOD OF THE NONBELIEVERS -- ed ranting and Jake getting into it Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 May 2002 %% Vanyel: Popunder ads are gonna be pantented! wob: how lame is that crap ed: fuckin whores ed: only a fuckin luser could come up with that. ed: if I _ever_ find the guy that came up with that, I'm gonna fuckin popunder a baseball bat to their nuts -- ed on a roll again Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 May 2002 %% Vanyel: try hotwire Vanyel: its kinda like priceline, but without william shatner -- Vanyel on airline tickets Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 May 2002 %% Vanyel: ed Vanyel: calling what you get, irritated is like calling jefferey dahlmner "hungry" -- Vanyel, on ed's irritation Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% marcie: i swear i'm going to d/l the quotes file onto my palm pilot marcie: just so i can whip it out and amuse myself marcie: quote THAT out of context -- marcie covering her ass Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% china: someone's penis is formatted correctly? marcie: heheheh Vanyel raises his hand china runs marcie: FAT32? Vanyel: ufs. marcie: ooh right Vanyel: with inodes every 1024. Kestrel: micro particle DontKnow 's penis uses advfs. Vanyel: right DK Vanyel: and thats why noone knows how to mount its filesystem -- geek sex Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% Kestrel: I have a question Vanyel: i'm sure you do. Kestrel: is it required that you SA/IS/IT types WHINE incesantly? marcie: yes. cuinhell: yes. Kestrel: ah Vanyel: yes. marcie: you have to ask? Kestrel: thank-you Manuka: and usually, I also have to exterminate cuinhell: it's a by product of all the luser pissing and moaning we hear daily marcie: it infects us. Kestrel: it's a contagion? marcie: it's a curse cuinhell: the stench of it penetrates us Cyrano: whining. Cyrano: see Cyrano: SA/IS/IT types don't generate the whinage Cyrano: they just are conduits Cyrano: we get it in and have to dump it out before it overloads us Cyrano: kind of like a sump pump. marcie: best explanation i've heard yet cuinhell: otherwise we'd pipe more lusers to death and lose our jobs -- the geeks with an explanation Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% Manuka: marcie: the new 7-series has 73 computer-like devices on board marcie: i'd hate to see your car get a blue screen of death marcie: "please reboot your brake system and try again" *CRASH* cuinhell: HAHHAA Manuka: marcie: ironic you should say that - the ones that actually have user interfaces run CE marcie: remind me not to buy BMWs -- marcie making a note to self Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% Cyrano: be really worried when your _realdoll_ crashes Cyrano: GENERAL PENETRATION FAULT marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHa Vanyel: AHAHAHAHAH cuinhell: SEAL UP ALL ORIFICES! -- Cyrano with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% saundo: Gary Condit and his rendition of "The Levy is Dry" Al: BOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! saundo: lord, I apologise for that. marcie: lies Moni: OH MY GOD saundo Moni smacks him around Cyrano: heh Moni pretends not to laugh saundo: hee -- saundo keeping up on current events Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% saundo: there is this word, called "subtle" which appears to be in danger of being extinct here -- saundo on EN conversation Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% Cyrano: ever jump on and do an unintentional somersault into a wall? saundo: erm, no. Moni: not yet Moni giggles at the image saundo: I leave my acrobatics for dodging bullets at work Cyrano: it's even funnier when the other person is...unable to help saundo: ahahahahahah Cyrano: and of course, laughing hysterically saundo: "ooooh baby, I'm all you--" *BOING* *CRACK* OW! *THUMP* Cyrano: damn that delta-v Moni: ROFL Cyrano: yah Cyrano: wood paneling wall, no give saundo: ahahahahah -- Cyrano bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% saundo: i saw a mullet at disney that was an Elvis Disney mullet saundo: it was FRIGHTENING Jake: elvis disney mullet??? Jake: did you get a picture? saundo: no saundo: alas Jake: I woulda bought a camera at one of the 758309 places they sell em saundo: i tried, but it escaped into the wilds of the nearest budweiser stand -- saundo going mullet-spotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% taco: hey, what's it mean when ice cream comes out of the freezer with frozen parts and warm parts? marcie: your freezer sucks Al: or it's just defrosting saundo: you need to stop holding the ice cream to your chest Al: or someone's been eating it Jake: its radioactive taco: it's only warm and melted about the carmel ribbon parts saundo: check your flux capacitator marcie: change the oil saundo: rotate the tires marcie: check your autoexec.bat file Al: recalibrate the bogon deflector Al: add three liters of accelerant Al: and check the belts marcie: reinstall saundo: retry saundo: reboot Al: fdisk /dev/hda marcie: hope that helps. -- the geeks, helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2002 %% sunbeam: well how many times can you look at a naked girl before you realize they all have the same parts Cyrano: it's not the parts, it's what's they're doing at the time -- sunbeam and Cyrano on porn Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 May 2002 %% sunbeam: well what is the reason for looking at porn? Cyrano: education. Cyrano: amusement. Cyrano: endocrinic response. sunbeam: i've got a tanning appointment in ten minutes i gotta go Cyrano: what is the reason for getting a tan? sunbeam: because no matter what your ass looks like, it always looks better brown -- sunbeam with a retort Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 May 2002 %% Slayer: stupid bitch meg: ugly fuck Slayer: i wasn't talking to you, but if you like, i can -- Slay and meg loving on each other, as usual Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 May 2002 %% Slayer: it'd a very odd thing listening to mozart while watching lactation porn -- Slayer's viewing habits Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 May 2002 %% *Manuka* the other day, we were restocking on condoms, and the people in front of us and the people behind us had diapers, clothes, and other baby supplies. *Manuka* I looked at andrea, pointed at the box, and said "5 bucks". Then i pointed at the register for the guy in front of us.. "75 bucks". -- Manuka on birth control Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 May 2002 %% marcie: okay, coming in first inthe "how sad is this geek contest": marcie: marcie! for downloading 40 country mp3s from winmx in the last 2 days marcie bows Vanyel: ugh cuinhell: ahehehe marcie: heheh Vanyel: at least you dudnt pay for them marcie: duh rayray: hey DontKnow: nothing wrong with country music marcie: why do you think i love winmx rayray: exactly cuinhell: marcie: try having more than 40 country cd's in mp3 format...and hating country marcie: never mind cuin marcie: you win. -- marcie and cuin, rednecks Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 May 2002 %% Manuka: "unable to open your default e-mail folders" Manuka: christ on a crutch, this thing is braindead cuinhell: i'm sure outlook feels the same way sometimes... -- Manuka trying to subdue Outlook Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 May 2002 %% marcie: i have whole garlic cloves in this lamb marcie: i'd eat them, but i have to deal with my cow-orkers today marcie: damn them IGadget: heh or maybe your just a vampire ;) marcie: a possibility. Lia: eat them anyway Lia: tell them it's aprt of an ancient fertility ritual Lia: that ought to confuse them for the rest of the day Moni: eat them and breath on your boss Lia: and they'll leave you alone marcie grins marcie: i love you people marcie: you're more evil than i am -- marcie getting ideas on how to deal with work Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2002 %% cuinhell: An Oakdale, Neb., man known for his collection of poisonous snakes and exotic pets has been found dead in his trailer home. cuinhell: bad snake! Manuka: wonder how that happened cuinhell: the snakes were probably frightened by his mullet and acted in self defense -- cuinhell the animal expert Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2002 %% DontKnow: james, so now you're healthy Cyrano: kinda Cyrano: had a dream about a hallucinogenic blue raspberry granola bar -- Cyrano having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2002 %% Cyrano: I am lord of all I survey Cyrano: unfortunately that's limited to the basement and the partially remodeled bathroom at the moment. -- Cyrano the king of the world Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2002 %% Manuka: and, on top of all that, my stripper has gone AWOL marcie: i HATE when that happens marcie: did you not tip her enough? -- Manuka losing things Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2002 %% Slayer: oh shit, i'm missing fisting porn -- Slayer with an important appointment Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2002 %% icesatan: Slayer must be the biggest lamer here cuinhell: he was, until today icesatan: I'm not a lamer, believe me. cuinhell: good god, someone save that for the quote page -- the n00bz about to lose Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2002 %% Slayer: holy shit i think i just saw my ex girlfriend in a porno -- Slayer shocked Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2002 %% cuinhell: typoing in WIN at the c: prompt isn't hacking, junior -- cuinhell with an important lesson Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2002 %% Kestrel: lady...and gentlemen... I am sorry I missed the festivities... I stand in awe of your abuse and smart-ass abusive manner cuinhell: how ya, kes? wob: heh ed: haha Kestrel: and you ed... YOU.... IGadget: wob need to make that t00lz.html Kestrel: like the son I never had... wob: psh *** Barry has entered room 'Main' Kestrel: or drowned while the mommy was passed out wob: TOOL Kestrel: whatever -- Kestrel feeling all paternal Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2002 %% Slayer: apparently there _is_ no lower limit to the intelligence required to get online -- Slayer, disgusted (for once) Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2002 %% Vanyel: usb 2.0 is faster than firewire if you sacrefice a goat on an alter, wash teh feathers away with holy water, throw salt ove rhte left of the port, and sing "kumbaya" -- Vanyel with technical advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 May 2002 %% Vanyel: i mean really, how often do hot psycho chicks come in here? Kestrel looks away from marcie -- Kestrel being innocent Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2002 %% Vanyel: bon jovi singing neil young songs Vanyel: now i'm in a killing mood -- Vanyel honing his rage Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2002 %% Slayer: QUOTE OF THE DAY: Slayer: ` cuinhell: profound -- Slayer having deep thoughts Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2002 %% Kestrel: you youngsters may be all hot shit TODAY but in goddamned 1979 *I* was the shit! -- Kestrel the old fart Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2002 %% Lia: fuck Lia: fuck a song Lia: fuck it hard Al: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA wob: FUCK IT LONG wob: YEAH -- wob getting excited Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2002 %% Sarge: so are you going to hack our firewall 007? 007: y do you have somthing on you comp that i want Jim: 007 must be 1337!! Sarge: not sure.. Sarge: lets see...I just got "not another teen movie" on divx Sarge: a few gig of mp3's Sarge: pictures of me fucking your mother.. -- doh! Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2002 %% Slayer: i have found the very reason the internet exists Slayer: i just found nude female russian oil wrestling -- Slayer as Magellan Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2002 %% Xi: oddness there Vanyel: i'm definately gonna go eat now Vanyel: before this gets wrose. *** Vanyel is now known as LUNCHyel marcie: heh Moni: it always gets worse Moni: it will be worse when you get back Moni: sick minds take practice -- Moni with words of wisdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2002 %% Moni: dammit Moni: my new cock is late marcie: i hate when that happens... -- Moni lamenting Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2002 %% Cyrano: with 50lb of stainless sheet and a rivet gun, nothing is safe. Sarge: especially my cock... Cyrano: especially that. -- Cyrano warning Sarge Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2002 %% Cyrano: I'm just here until the heavy painkillers kick in -- Cyrano with an excuse Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2002 %% marcie: D 3 Jun 3 marc.thoelen@luc.a (2,321) 2nd CPU 'vanished' marcie: i'd like to see how that happened! Sarge: 5 finger discount Jim: somebody swiped yer CPU! Sarge: it was a CPU abduction! marcie: heheh Jim: i hate it when people take liberties like that... Sarge: (insert x-files theme here) Sarge: the truth is out there Jim: maybe a tear in the space time continuum opened up and sucked the 2nd CPU into another dimension.. Jim: thats not entirely unheard of marcie: werd marcie: especially when you fail to sacrifice the correct chicken to the computer Sarge: I think it's warp core had a breech and it imploded Jim: you didnt manage to find a Microsoft exec in time... Sarge: those cpus these days are pretty high tech you know Jim: it could have evolved and wandered off Sarge: that is always an option yes Sarge: was it a sun cpu marcie? marcie: compaq alpha Sarge: because if it was an intel chip it might have done the opposite and deevolved and gone back to being avery small piece of copper marcie: ahahahahahaha Sarge: oh well that's easy to figure out then... it had an identity crisis and left to seek help marcie: SO TRUE Sarge: I would check mis's office..it probably went there Jim: couldnt decide who was daddy.. Compaq or Digital marcie: damn good idea Sarge: am I digital? am I compaq..am I HP? Sarge: I DON"T KNOW!!! marcie: grin Jim: maybe its conversing with a VAX :) Jim: "... do you know who i am?" marcie: "are you my motherboard?" -- geeks doing psychoanalysis Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 June 2002 %% Jim: yahoo groups.. may they die rotting in hell Jim: how whipped do their mail servers have to be not to send me a damned notification 5 minutes after i send an email Jim: run by n000000000000000000000000000bs Jim: wheres ed when ya need him Jim: its so slow, it could be accidently confused with a govt. department cuinhell: new service...email via USPS cuinhell: guaranteed non-delivery for all those mission critical emails Jim: yah.. you'd send a 100k attachment, it'd arrive as a 48k attachment dented and smashed and corrupt.. Jim: 3 months later cuinhell: hehehe cuinhell: PERFECT Jim: i'll probably need to fill out a lost email form ya know cuinhell: yes cuinhell: and make sure you check the Please fold, spidle, AND mutilate box cuinhell: spindle Jim: some fucker in eastern europe probbaly has my email verification request Jim: i'll probably end up with some golf clubs Jim: *kicks the computer* I HATE TECHNOLOGY!!!!! Jim: arrgh cuinhell: some third world country has it right now and are baseing their newly formed constitution on it cuinhell: you shall go down in history as Jim the Deliverer....and then be assassinated for treason Jim: just how i wanted to be remembered in ife -- Jim cursing yahoo.com Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% cuinhell: bat poo does NOT stay crispy in milk -- cuinhell with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% Cyrano: I *heart* molecular sieves -- Cyrano in chem geek mode Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% cuinhell: nothing says "i love you" like a necklace made of dried penises -- cuinhell, the romantic Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% ed: most of us could have been killers, and may still turn out to be, but, we've currently redirected our hatred of the world towards the digital sphere. -- ed on his fellow systems administrators Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% Kestrel: I had a gf for a while that I couldn't take out in the woods because of the sasquatch sighting reports that resulted -- Kestrel confessing past relationships Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% Courtney: I've been having weird anal sex dreams lately Courtney: just in case anyone cares -- Courtney sharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% Vanyel: oh slay Vanyel: i've got something for you Slayer: uh Vanyel: bluegrass version of "the wall" Slayer: is it, or has it ever been, attached to your... oh, ok -- Slayer, suspicious Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2002 %% cuinhell: i declare today Marcie Day. BOW BEFORE HER YOU CRETINS! -- cuinhell making a proclamation Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2002 %% Cyrano: cheetoh dust. Cyrano: the cement of RPG sessions. -- Cyrano the nerd Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2002 %% Cyrano: I'm poking...the darkness! cuinhell: HAHAHAHAHHAHA cuinhell: ARE THERE ANY GIRLS? Manuka: hey, I ain't touching vanyel's darkness Cyrano: in the fridge, DUH! Cyrano: mmm cuinhell: I CAST MAGIC MISSILE Cyrano: cheetoh dust. Cyrano: the cement of RPG sessions. cuinhell: werd cuinhell: i so cannot wait for neverwinter nights to be released Jim: Magic Missile does +3 damage, Vanyels coffee mug is leaking marcie: i'd say you people worry me, but that would be stating the obvious marcie: so i shan't marcie: "there is now an arrow sticking out of the gazebo" Manuka: heehee Cyrano: hm cuinhell: you nub us and want to pinch our chubby little cheeks, admit it, ed: we abused some fake n00bz before eh? Cyrano: does surviving listening to marketing require a save vs death magic ed: I don't think that was the case cuinhell: they were barely even classified as skript kiddies ed: I think that they were real live n00bz IGadget: ed: they were marcie: i dew marcie: i admit it cuinhell: james: both ed: they had the lingo down to well ed: dammit Cyrano: aheh cuinhell: you must save vs death to keep your sanity and intellect intact, and ed: I just got a fuckin call xferred to me with somebody trying to sell me handicapped made pens and artwork Cyrano: ah Cyrano: but a can of coke gives you +2 on the save cuinhell: yes Cyrano: unfortunately having had lunch in the last hour is -3 cuinhell: and not being a luser gives you +3 on the sv death cuinhell: BUT, if they have colorful brochures or powerpoint slides you suffer a -1 on the sv death Jim: Casts apple danish at Cyrano cuinhell: ooooooo, that's a tough one to resist Cyrano already has Protection from Cantrips up Cyrano digs around for "Power Word: FOO" cuinhell begins to cast Attempt to Secure Lunch Plans cuinhell: crap, my soul is bound to this conf call ed attempts to move W, towards bathroom cuinhell: someone cast Freedom on me! ed *you cannot go that way, a smelly billing wench blocks your path* cuinhell: RUN ED! ed *you hit the billing wench* marcie: the billing wench is angry! ed *the billing wench sics her unprofessional dog that lives under her desk on you* Cyrano: the billing wench gazes at you Cyrano: you feel your life slipping away! ed *the dog attacks you* cuinhell: Leather Billing Wenches of Phobos ed look dog Cyrano: c|n>k ed he smells vaguely like old twat and alpo marcie: nonono marcie: Leather Admin Assistants of Phobos marcie: much better cuinhell: HAHAHHA *** ed is now known as the *** the is now known as ed Cyrano puts the AA into the T-remover ed the dog lunges at you Cyrano presses the button ed you scramble past the dog ed run W Cyrano opens the T-remover, revealing an Admin Assisans cuinhell: the conf call has degenerated into small talk cuinhell: there is no greater hell Cyrano sics the admin assisan on the dog Manuka: an Admin Assasin ? ed the door is locked, a nasty smell is eminating from the cracks around it ed *you've been poisoned!* *** ed is now known as RIPed Cyrano: a small dart narrowly misses you! cuinhell: *you begin to wretch* *** RIPed is now known as ed ed: mahah Cyrano: you hear high pitched laughter in the distance ed: *your cell begins ringing, half way through the first contraction* cuinhell: HAHHAHAHAHA marcie: hahahha ed: *you tense up* cuinhell: dammit, ed I KNOW that feeling Cyrano: rofl Cyrano: ok Cyrano: AdminHack ed your turd has broken. cuinhell: i ALWAYS get phone calls when i shit Cyrano: You are carrying: Jim: You are in the lobby of a chat room.. you see fellow netizens around you, you do not feel safe.. there is one exit, the sign above it reads "Menu" Cyrano: a cell phone Cyrano: a pager (broken) ed: a leatherman (sharp) marcie: a pint of Guinness ed: a lid cuinhell: a lead pipe (LART) ed: *haha* Cyrano: a shiny fromitz board (it's amazing what you can find on Ebay these days) ed: a some luser remains IGadget: a comopany credit card cuinhell: a luser approaches you and begins to ask a question Jim > Look menu Cyrano: a copy of "Ethel the Aardvark goes quantity surveying" Jim: You do not find it interesting Cyrano: (pop-up version) cuinhell: > LART luser with lead pipe marcie: hahahah Manuka: bwahahaha Cyrano: so Cyrano: are lusers @'s or h's? ed blood splatters on you cuinhell: You are in the break room. A bloody lump is all that remains of a luser. ed you feel invigorated ed you are the undead! Jim > toast luser... marcie: I don't see that here! cuinhell: You can smell a horrible stench. It seems to emanate from the coffee machine. ed: mahaah Manuka: you are in a maze of crappy software, all of which sucks! Cyrano: Eat the luser corpse (y/n)? Jim: The smell of the toasted luser fills the air.. you dry reach... Cyrano: That meat was tainted Cyrano: you feel deathly sick. Cyrano: the potion of holy water hits the luser! Cyrano: the luser bursts into flame! cuinhell: no nono cuinhell: the potion of cl00 Cyrano: mmm marcie: yes marcie: cl00. ed: a rock shoots from the lusers skull, badly bruising your forearm ed: -4 mobility cuinhell: HAHHAHHAA ed: -3 dex Jim > give luser clue ed: luser rejects clue marcie: The luser stares at you blankly. Cyrano: you (a)pply the leatherman (sharp) on the luser Cyrano: what do you want to engrave? ed: lbuf overrun Jim: luser does not have enough EXP to use clue.. *** SLEEPyel is now known as Vanyel ed: luser bursts into flames Vanyel: ASS! ed: jim: mahahaha Cyrano: hm' Cyrano: what's the sysadmins quest artifact Cyrano: a ring of invisability? ed: hmm Manuka: an amulet of slack IGadget: key to the phone room Vanyel: an office with a door. Manuka: hahahahahahah Vanyel: that locks. IGadget: and a lock Jim: Key to the Switchboard Vanyel: discussing the sysadmin RPG eh? cuinhell: werd yo marcie: something like that Manuka: heh, you could present it as a paper at the next LISA :) marcie: hell, we should write it marcie: i'd use it ;) Cyrano: I'm thinking the Sysadmin class for nethack Manuka: marcie: it would be cathartic, anyway Jim: could be a mud called "Office Space" IGadget: it would be too much work to be fun Cyrano: hell, it's got everything else in it cuinhell: A Boss attempts to get you to come on in Saturday! ed: there has to be something cuinhell: You dodge! IGadget: ot too much like work ed: hmm ed: artifacts Vanyel: im already building one marcie: that's my boy Vanyel: (sysadmin mud) IGadget: I remember somone tried one several years ago Jim > Boss tells you "Ummm Jim... im gonna have to get you to come in tomorrow.... yeaaaaah.... Oh and Jim.. you'll need to come in on Sunday too.. thanks..." -- planning the sysadmin RPG Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2002 %% wob: EL NINO wob: IS COMING cuinhell: on your face and tits -- the crew discussing the weather Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2002 %% Sarge: let me just put it out there, that some of you people are just plain freaks -- Sarge with a stunning realization Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 2002 %% DontKnow: my parents really considered buying a 300 year old castle in czech. cuinhell: that way they could stuff DK in the dungeon -- cuinhell on real estate Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 2002 %% Kestrel: my dad was one of the first in his class to walk upright -- bragging about academic accomplishments Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 2002 %% Kestrel: I know your type Kestrel: after you scratch your ass you sniff your finger Sarge: I hire people to do that -- Sarge, the rich bastard Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 2002 %% Sarge: is there a storm coming? Kesticle: no Sarge: ok Kesticle: it is perfectly safe and actually a good idea for you to go golfing Kesticle: right NOW Sarge: cool now where did I put those clubs Kesticle: /msg cu then we shall console his widow in ways most appalling to him -- cuinhell and kestrel plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 June 2002 %% Kes: I'd be embarassed to say what my balance is Vanyel: is it over 200 hours? Kes: over 800 Vanyel: damn Vanyel: well how long have you worked for tek? Kes: 23 YEARS cuinhell: 800!!?!?!?!?!?! cuinhell: FUCKING HELL Kes: it's my self initiated going away present Kes: they can't AFFORD to lay me off, they have to wait for me TO DIE -- Kestrel on his vacation hours Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 June 2002 %% Kestrel: I'n a psuedo-daddy this week, it's kind of a trip YaHoo: a what? Kestrel: have my muchly adored 6 yr old niece 24x7 for a week Kestrel: she will be able to field strip and clean a Glock by the time mommy gets her back -- Kestrel being a good role model Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 June 2002 %% Xi: spit sucking machine Xi: you gotta watch out for those things Xi: nothing worse than the assistant getting bored and accidently sucking up your uvula saundo: especially if you're in the waiting room Xi: you have to pay extra for that -- on the dentist Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 June 2002 %% cuinhell: furnitureporn.com is disturbing, yet strangly enticing cuinhell: hard to masturbate to, though -- cuinhell with a tip on pr0n Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 June 2002 %% Courtney: bleah.. hangover begone. cuinhell: i can't cure your hangover, i only offer empty sex. saundo: ahahahha saundo: ALWAYS THERE TO HELP -- cuinhell, helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 June 2002 %% Cyrano: it's that time again Cyrano: time to start requiring all service requests to be submitted in Olde English. -- Cyrano with a threat Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 June 2002 %% Moni grabs the lube and gloves Kestrel: yikes Kestrel: wanna check my prostate while you're there? Moni: I'm alwasy prepared, but everyone runs away -- Moni, the good Boy Scout Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 June 2002 %% Cyrano casts Resurrection on this Ultra 5's IDE drive... cuinhell: James: Cast Reincarnation on it, maybe it'll come back as SCSI -- D&D geeks as sysadmins Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2002 %% cuinhell: the true creator is the first to make a fully automated Jehovah's Witness launching device that looks like an ordinary welcome mat -- cuinhell on religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2002 %% querk: when fish spawn, I am at their beck and call -- querk with an obsession Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2002 %% marcie: don't join the dark side! marcie: oh wait marcie: that's microsoft Cyrano: ahahah Cyrano: so what's linux Cyrano: the soggy side? IGadget: plaid marcie: i dunno marcie: the gray side, maybe marcie: not quite dark IGadget: 70's plaid Cyrano: see marcie: diet dark Cyrano: it is a powerful force Cyrano: but that force can be used for both good and evil Cyrano: kind of like stupidity. marcie: stupidity is like the force. marcie: OH MAN marcie: that explains so much! marcie: shit marcie: i have to change religions now -- Linux and the Force Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 2002 %% Kestrel: great Kestrel: another serverely pissed off engineer Kestrel: I really need to take some child development/pshyc classes or something -- Kestrel dealing with work Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 June 2002 %% Xi: i think we need to implement some cones of silence in the mens room cu Xi: old fucker in there was talking to his penis -- Xi, disturbed Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2002 %% Kestrel: I can picture mont jerkin' the gerkin' to a pig fuck Kestrel: and I hate myself for that Cyrano: hm Monty: pigfucking? Monty: you don't even know what I look like -- Monty, thinking he's been insulted Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 2002 %% marcie: female orgasm helps with insemination Monty: AND IT'S FUN! -- Monty getting the idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 2002 %% Kes: I have returned to grace you with my invaluable experience Kes: or incontinence, whichever comes first -- Kes contributing to the group Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 2002 %% Cyrano: is considering sticking kids PCs on a separate subnet overkill? marcie: no. Vanyel: for most kids, yes Cyrano: I have these visions of virii... Cyrano: ahahah Vanyel: for kids that share your DNA? no. -- Cyrano and the demon spawn Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2002 %% zag: if i were reincarnated as afruit, i hope it would be a mango drdave: hrmm, making me hungry -- drdave craving strange fruit Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2002 %% K: as of today its 37 cents to mail anthrax to your favorite congressman -- K on the price of stamps Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2002 %% *** Crazy has entered room 'Main' Lia: VAN HAS TOXIC FARTS -- Lia with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 2002 %% saundo: because the purchase of sex toys is important in todays chocolate covered midget world marcie: *SNORK* marcie: god damn you, ,saudno saundo: ain't convergence of streams of thought grand? marcie: i'd never actually snorted vanilla ice cream out through my nose marcie: UNTIL NOW saundo: ahahahah saundo: you. are. welcome. -- saundo being a weirdo Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 2002 %% Slayer: i haven't had anyone try this hard to get me killed in a while Slayer: it's refreshing -- Slayer, awake Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 July 2002 %% ed: being smothered by an angst ridden whale is no way to leave life -- ed on death Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 July 2002 %% WORKyel: you know its hot out when you hafta put anti perswperant on your balls -- Vanyel complaining about the weather Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 2002 %% marcie: i'd be a slut if i had the energy -- marcie the good little girl Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 2002 %% Cyrano: I used to be able to pull all-nighters with nothing more than a 6-pack of coke and some jalapeno cheese dip -- Cyrano missing the good old days Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 July 2002 %% ed: what scares me are the dreams that keep coming in the night. Cyrano: the ones about princess, carrye, and the 400 gallons of chocolate pudding? Vanyel: oh my god. marcie: ugh marcie shudders violently marcie: thanks a LOT ed: well, those Cyrano: or was it strawberry jam... ed: but they're not as bad as the ones with altair and his offspring. Cyrano: ahahahah ed: hunting me Vanyel: oh god Vanyel: altair ed: with protractors marcie: HAHAHaHAHA Cyrano: rofl -- the trashing continues Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 July 2002 %% Al: my cousin Joe started playing the bugle in the boy scouts Al: it was enough of a thing to shape his life - he's now a music teacher cuinhell: hrm cuinhell: so lots of altar boys are destined to become fluffers then Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- cuinhell on Fate Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 July 2002 %% zag: i wonder if i could use a trumpet mouthpiece as a bowl for my makeshift bong -- zag pondering the finer things in life Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 July 2002 %% Jake: nothing better then clergy molestation humor -- Jake being funny Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 July 2002 %% Cyrano: I wonder Cyrano: how did all of those mad scientists of old afford the upkeep on their decaying bavarian castles? Vanyel: evil servants. Kestrel: volume Kestrel: it's all done in volume Vanyel: IGOR! TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE! Vanyel: yeeees mhasta! Cyrano: Igor, go for brains! Cyrano: Igor, go for sandwiches! Kestrel: ABBY! Cyrano: normal marcafk: you people are disturbed -- marcie walking in on disturbing things Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2002 %% wob: shit happens Cyrano: verily -- Cyrano speaketh Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2002 %% Slayer: my kid's first words will likely either be "lasagna" or "hail satan" -- Slayer, the good daddy Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2002 %% wob: I CAN MAKE MY BOOBIES JIGGLE -- ew. Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2002 %% Kestrel: let us pray... Kestrel: oh lord... Kestrel: lead us not into chapter 11 Kestrel: but deliver us from our own incompetance and deceipt -- Kestrel with the Enron & Worldcom prayer Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 July 2002 %% Vanyel: YOUR MARKETING REPORT FILLS YOU WITH DISHONOR! -- Vanyel ranting about work Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 July 2002 %% Vanyel: I have more hair on my body than some men have on their heads Vanyel: i'nm a fucking gorilla with a keyboard and a pair of headphones -- Vanyel bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 July 2002 %% Slayer: i've succeded in screwing myself. due to the new AC i have, it's too cold to masturbate. -- Slayer outsmarting himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 July 2002 %% Vanyel: i have enough earwax to drown a small family of cats -- Vanyel attending to personal hygiene Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 2002 %% Kestrel: james, what is your ealiest memory of electicity? Cyrano: oh, that's easy Cyrano: I was 3 Kestrel: earliest Kestrel: ok Cyrano: my parents found me with a screwdriver Cyrano: taking wallplates off Kestrel was 3 also wob: haha Kestrel: HAHAHAH wob: i was 3 also Kestrel: dewd wob: sticking a phone they had given me wob: the cord into the outlet marcie: aw marcie: geek bonding Cyrano: and yes, I had electrical contact Kestrel: I was 3... stuck a fork in a wall socket, started a fire wob: haha -- fond memories... Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 2002 %% Cyrano: ahahah Cyrano: you know, the vega got a bad rep Cyrano: true, the engine would melt down idling at a stop light -- Cyrano on cars Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 2002 %% Vanyel: I currently have a unabrow Cyrano: I do too, but every once in a while I wake up to see my wife poised above me with tweezers Cyrano: hell of a way to wake up -- Cyrano and his loving wife Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 August 2002 %% querk: buncha sluts and whores on here querk: *hmph* wob: yah really marcie: ain't it great? querk peeks down marcie's shirt -- querk the chaste and virginal Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2002 %% Cyrano: I knew a guy in vacaville who bought a 4-pack of them at a police auction, all 4 for $1k Cyrano: he got the license plate "HOTSWAP", plated only one of them, and when it had problems he swapped plates until he could fix the first one :) Cyrano: redundant array of independant dodges Xi: hehehe -- Cyrano on old police cars Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 August 2002 %% marcie: you know catholics believe when they take eucharist that the bread and wine magically becomes jesus' actually body and blood marcie: it's a mindfuck marcie: i love it Xi: hmmm Xi: gotta love having power like that over people Vanyel: you know what I always wanted to do Vanyel: take a class of milk while they are giving communion Vanyel: Guess what part of jesus THIS IS! -- Vanyel on religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 August 2002 %% saundo: must. have. streaming. mp3s. in. bathroom. -- saundo with a goal Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2002 %% Vanyel: shes got a great body. Vanyel: for wahtever thats worth. Xi: any part in particular? Vanyel: most of it Vanyel: excluding her fake boobies Xi: are you saying you have intimate knowledge of her kidneys? -- Xi quizzing Vanyel on his sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 2002 %% sunbeam: goldfish go pretty far when you throw them -- sunbeam, future member of PETA Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 2002 %% Slayer: i don't think i fucked soney up the ass Slayer: but i fucked miri, krista, and DK up the ass Slayer: vanyel just better hope he doesn't get drunk around me or i'll have him too Marianne: well alrighty then Slayer stands behind marianne Xi: FIRE IN THE HOLE! Slayer: bwahahahaha Xi ducks and covers. Slayer: you fucker Slayer: i spat rum and coke all over the place Xi: AHAHAHAHA Slayer: and i can't stop laughing Slayer: i hate you with all the blackness in my heart -- Slayer recounting his heroic deeds Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 2002 %% *** sunbeam has entered room 'Main' sunbeam: good morning cuinhell: lies. -- cuinhell the cheery Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 August 2002 %% Cyrano: a box of blasting caps, forty kilos of gelignite, and thou... -- Cyrano the romantic Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 August 2002 %% marcie: she's cute Al: I'll place her in category 17. Moni: nice and curvy ass Moni: bit too skinny otherwise Al: fuck her, and leave her in a ditch. Moni: oh..well..that's nice cuinhell: HAHAHA marcie: such gentlemen you all are marcie: no wonder you're all happily married to gorgeous women marcie: oh, wait... -- the EN Man Show Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 August 2002 %% Slayer: goddamit Slayer: someone flirt with me Xi: install a bot that will play the turing test with you Slayer: i have Slayer: they all hate me -- Slayer wanting attention Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2002 %% Cyrano: you know you love someone if you can pass a vomit bowl back and forth -- Cyrano on he and his wife having the flu Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2002 %% ed: somebody stole my fuckin pen ed: goddamit ed: I'll have to scrawl my death threats in blood. -- ed, pissed off Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 August 2002 %% Vanyel: the last project i was rushing to do before I leave just goy delayed cuz the other guy working on it got fired cuinhell: for gross incompetance? Vanyel: probably Vanyel: for all I know, he had a dead child in his turban cuinhell: hahaha -- Vanyel hard at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 August 2002 %% Vanyel: according to teh email, i was supposed to tell all my friends to download and install it Vanyel: it did not instruct me what to do when they laughed, though;. -- Vanyel on Netscape 7 Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 August 2002 %% Sarge: one girl i had to help with her password was about to pop out of her tank top.. I'm surprised she even could get into it cuinhell: "your new password is t1tt13s!" -- cuinhell the clever BOFH Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 August 2002 %% Vanyel: ok all fixed wob: did not Vanyel: uh huh. wob: nuh huh Vanyel: uh huh to infinity no backsies wob: shit -- paper, rock, wob Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 September 2002 %% marcie: I SUCK BILL GATES' DICK marcie: SLURP SLURP SLURP Sarge: the first step is admiting you have a problem.. -- Sarge playing counselor Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 September 2002 %% William: i hate being drunk -- lies! Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 September 2002 %% DontKnow: my sister had a nasty fight with a roommate once over toilet paper. basically the two never were friends again afterwards. *** wob has entered room 'Main' Slayer: toilet paper has come between so many friends -- so true Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 2002 %% Slayer: but lately i've had messy shits DontKnow: nah, normally I have nice clean shits. marcie: and here i am eating chocolate ice cream with peanut butter chunks. -- marcie, green Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 2002 %% Kestrel: screw it wob: that's what slayer said Kestrel: I'm heavily armed and married to a open minded woman wob: and did. wob: haha wob: ! Moni: slayer would screw anything Kestrel: I have the skid marks to prove it wob: now that is worth quoting marcie: bwahahaha Kestrel: I haven't been able to hear out my right ear ever since wob: HAHA -- Kestrel, a brave man Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 2002 %% Kestrel: my nad has stopped hurting but now I have a headache Kestrel: I think this is the sign of being a dickhead -- Kestrel, that dickhead Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 2002 %% cuinhell: there is never enough room for porn cuinhell: in fact, I think that when the amount of porn in the world reaches critical mass that it will collapse into a blackhole shaped like an inverted nipple Slayer: i only keep quality porn Slayer: and anything involving dobermans -- Slayer on quality control Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 September 2002 %% cuinhell: werd, 50 pounds of silly putty -- cuinhell entertaining himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 September 2002 %% Sarge: ed are you serious, or being sarcastic? I really can't tell Jim: theres a difference? Sarge: yeah, sarcastic has more letters -- Sarge, suspicious Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 September 2002 %% Vanyel: oh shit, I just realised something Xi: yes, that's a penis Xi: you've had it your whole life Vanyel: :-P -- Xi comforting Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 September 2002 %% Slayer: i love chicks with satanic pussies -- Slayer defining his standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 September 2002 %% DontKnow: "Senior Help Desk" now that is a position I don't want. DontKnow hates being dragged out of bed by phone calls ed: anything with Hell Desk DontKnow: (especially those saying that I didn't pay my cable bill last month) ed: I'd fuckin flip burgers. ed: I'd troll under a fucking bridge. *** ed is now known as trollED trollED: give me your children trollED: I want your children trollED: I need them to run the generator that powers my laptop. DontKnow hands the troll a turd. here have my child, I don't want it. Kestrel: ed Kestrel: roll them in a light panko breading before frying, they turn out nice and crispy trollED: you, give me your cell phone with 3G trollED: I need net trollED: give me your wife. marcie gets the giggles trollED: I am up on my hobo signs trollED: I will not be stopped -- ed the troll king Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% Cyrano: the word for the day is " -- Cyrano expanding our vocabulary Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% Kestrel: I have a bugs bunny suit and I'm not afraid to use it -- Kestrel going slightly mad Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% Vanyel: I'm going to patent passing gas. Vanyel: every time you fart, you'll owe me a royalty. -- Vanyel finding a way to make $$$ Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% Xi: BEHOLD! ITS THE LONE JEW OF THE APOCALYPSE -- Xi proclaiming The End of All Things Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% Moni: bah..highly suicidal patient didn't show up for her appointment with me and isn't answering her phone Moni: dammit Moni: don't kill yourself late on a Friday afternoon Moni: then I have to stay late to do paperwork Moni: inconsiderate patients -- Moni wanting to go home Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% Xi: anyone that can keep a leash on ozzy has got to be worth her wait in bling bling -- Xi on Sharon Osbourne Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% zag: i'm currently making firestarter with dryer lint and paraffin zag: it's the simple things, really -- zag on her wilderness adventure Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2002 %% Slayer: remember, if god hadn't meant for us to eat me, he wouldn't have invented steakhouses -- Slayer with a Freudian slip Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 September 2002 %% Al: I wonder if my lineprinter is rackmountable -- Al pondering evil things Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 September 2002 %% Slayer: so cold. so very, very cold. marcie lights slayer on fire marcie: better? Slayer: how rude -- Slayer, offended Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2002 %% Cyrano: SOLARIS DEVELOPER CONNECTION NEWSLETTER Cyrano: ... Cyrano: DID YOU KNOW? Cyrano: Cyrano: * By default, the Apache HTTP Server sends information in clear Cyrano: text over the Internet. Cyrano slams his head into the keyboard, repeatedly -- Cyrano losing hope Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2002 %% Cyrano: maybe there's a way to merge internet gambling and porn... Cyrano: now that would be a success formula Cyrano: you could gamble for porn Cyrano: like with progressive slot machines Cyrano: have to keep winning to keep watching marcie: what a great idea Cyrano: start with really small stakes and tame stuff wob: all we need are sluts marcie: SLUTS Cyrano: and at the other end you've got 17 year olds and dobermans -- Cyrano with a great idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2002 %% Slayer: why don't we get drunk and screw Vanyel hands slay a bottle of vodka and a phillips screwdriver Slayer: i don't like vodka Vanyel takes the vodka back and hits slay over the head with a bottle of capt. morgan -- Slayer showing his appreciation Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2002 %% Slayer: EN circle jerk Slayer: everybody shake hands with the chatter to your right Slayer positions himself between firl and moni Slayer: ahem Slayer: now we're ready Vanyel: afk firl: um, maybe its my bedtime marcie: i gotta pee -- the crowd disperses quickly Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 September 2002 %% Vanyel: or, what happens when a woman yells at you because, and I quote. "You're taking all the good apples! I'm gonna call the cops!" Lia: grocery shopping? Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: my response prolly didnt help much marcie: ahhah marcie: what did you say? Vanyel: "McIntosh works just as well for satanic rituals" marcie: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH Lia: oy marcie: oh, you ARE my hero -- Vanyel not taking it any more Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 September 2002 %% firl: i need someone to fix my printer. I have a new ink cartridge that won't print . grr Slayer: shove your panties in it firl: in the printer? hmmm.. will that *work*? Slayer: of course it will firl: hmmm... now the printer is making a screaching noise and i think I smell smoke Slayer: maybe you shouldn't have put your panties in it firl: well, it's TOO late NOW firl: slay, yhou owe me a printer! Slayer: shouldn't wear panties anyway firl: well, who said they were ON me at the time! Slayer: well, ok -- Slay with the solution Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2002 %% china: heya china: where've you been? ed: casually masturbating Jake: opposed to formally masturbating? Jake: like in a tux? Vanyel: whats the difference? ed: you have to return the tux.. Vanyel: I SHALL NOW MASTURBATE Jake: in a tux? Vanyel: SELF GRATIFICATION SHALL BEGIN IN 10 SECONDS! Jake: if it formall or casual? Jake: formal Jake: damnit Jake: I can't spell Jake: stupid public education china: they didn't teach you how to wank and type at the same type, huh? -- Jake blaming it all on The Man Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 2002 %% taco: though, I have good hair now and that's all that counts -- taco on a really bad break-up Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 2002 %% firl: and we're going for a jog b4 breakfast, so .. get ready Slayer: fuck that shit firl: heh firl: gotta keep my girlish figure Slayer: oh, yeah, YOU need to jog and do crunches and use a butt luge and what not. i'll just sit around and watch tv. firl: hehehe. well, I used to just WATCH the "Exercise channel" but it wasn't working out so well for me. Slayer: baby steps firl: something like that. -- firl the motivation expert Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2002 %% Vanyel: argh marcie: ewps Vanyel: I hate getting all comfortable then realisng that you forgot to go shopping Lia: so go shopping tomorrow Vanyel: well Vanyel: I have no food in the house marcie: he needs tampons Vanyel: so i have to either go shopping or go out and get stuff marcie: it's quite urgent Vanyel: yeahj i'm having my period DontKnow: or order delivery Vanyel: that woule explain why i've been so damn bitchy all week wob: yes please get him some fucking midol too Lia: *giggle* marcie: but it DOESNT explain why you're bitchy all the time! -- Vanyel having hormonal problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2002 %% Moni: oh..I want to be pregnant marcie gets moni pregnant -- marcie with mad skillz Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2002 %% Cyrano: did you know Cyrano: equal parts plaster of paris and aluminum flake make a castable incendiary marcie: of course YOU would know that, jamez -- Cyrano the pyro Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2002 %% firl: i need to find the market cap, net income and cash holdings for the top 5 competitors of California Pizza Kitchen ... firl: the problem with this assignment is that i get hungry -- firl writing a paper Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2002 %% Cyrano: bbiab, searching for null modem cable Al: WIMP Al: use two paperclips -- Al with a command Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2002 %% Vanyel: ARGH Vanyel: goddamn this is painful cuinhell: use more lube Vanyel: I didnt need lube for your mother cuinhell: you will when she gets out the strapon marcie: and that's why i love this place marcie: discussions of strap=on sex with jerod's mother. Vanyel: how do you think he was concieved? -- woo woo! Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 2002 %% Vanyel: yeah, last night, I drempt of a talking bagel that kept eating the lox I put on it -- Vanyel having Jewdreams Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 2002 %% Cyrano: software Cyrano: firmware Cyrano: hardware Cyrano: why not jigglyware? ed: they got 'em. ed: lojack bras Cyrano: ooer ed: work yoru daughters breasts over! ONLINE! ed: thats a killer app.. Cyrano: yeah Cyrano: you could integrate it with xtraceroute Cyrano: with RFC1876 and IPv6, every nipple on the planet can be geographically addressed Xi: and chrated Xi: erm Xi: charted Cyrano: I wonder if dynamic DNS could be used to update rfc1876 fields Cyrano: then you could have a GPS in a laptop, updating lat/long live Xi: imagine a chart of worldwide nipple location per day Xi: nipple activity in your area Cyrano: nipple forecasts Xi: excellent Cyrano: sweatercasts Xi: "We'll have a strong chance of sweater-clad nipples appearing in the northeast today" Xi: we had the weather channel Xi: now we get the nipple channel Xi: nothing but nipple forecasts Xi: all day marcafk: y'all are some seriously disturbed children *** marcafk is now known as marcie Xi: you mean to tell me you wouldn't watch a sweater forecast? marcie: i didn't say that ;) -- The Nipple Channel Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 October 2002 %% Cyrano: good thing there are some decent human beings out there Cyrano: though most of the population is basically useless *** Sarge has entered room 'Main' Cyrano: no comment. -- alas, poor Sarge... Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 October 2002 %% sunbeam: i think theres a secret formula to having a successful relationship but nobody will give it to me Vanyel: well Vanyel: my parents figured it out sunbeam: mine didn't..but then again cheating is a no brainer Moni: it's pretty simple...honest, open, trusting communication and patience Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: in other words, marry an alien -- Vanyel the cynical Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 October 2002 %% marcie: if you're going to have colon cancer marcie: you might as well call it ass cancer. marcie: that's a cooler name. Lia: *snork* marcie: ;) Cyrano: ha. Vanyel: I dont want ANY cancer Cyrano: ass transplant. Vanyel: heh Cyrano: we can rebuild him. we have the technology. Vanyel: rofl Vanyel: i love you guys Cyrano: we can make him bigger, jigglier, stinkier. Cyrano: dididididididi*FWWWRRRP*dididi Cyrano: the 6 million dollar ass. Lia giggles Vanyel: rofl -- ASS! Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 October 2002 %% Vanyel: that was the rankest fart in the history of my being ... Vanyel: i swear, this gas has to be visible Vanyel: i can just imagine a yellow gas coming out each time i fart Lia: you better open a window or something Vanyel: i got all the windows open Vanyel: tho the glass is melting Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- VAN HAS TOXIC FARTS! Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 October 2002 %% Vanyel: go go gadget Ambien! *** Vanyel is now known as ZZZyel Cyrano: ok Cyrano: I'm signing off ZZZyel: later ZZZyel: CURSE YOU AMBIEN! *** Cyrano is now known as afk ZZZyel: Dr. INSOMNIA MAY BE DOWN, BUT HE'S NOT DEFEATED! ZZZyel: CURSES! FOILED AGAIN! afk: oddly enough afk: some drugs seem to "stretch" the sleep I get afk: so a little goes farther afk: here's hoping afk goes off to dream of dean-stark traps ZZZyel: you always have to out-weird me dont you ZZZyel: i got for real now -- the adventures of Dr. Insomnia Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 October 2002 %% Sarge: Natural redheads need 20% more anesthesia than other people report scientists. Cyrano: that's just because they're whiny. -- Cyrano with the scientific explanation Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2002 %% firl: hehe, I met Tom on Saturday at the game Slayer: whore firl: i haven't slept w/ him yet Slayer: tease -- firl can't win Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2002 %% Slayer: i like agression Slayer: where's that goddamned settler i built Sarge: slayer likes it hard and rough.. or so I hear Slayer: i need him to plug a hole Sarge: van's ASS! hole? marcafk: i just bet you do firl: i've got a hole he can plug firl: oh my god did i just say that? -- firl reverting to her inner teenage boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2002 %% Sarge: why do I fight with my wife? it's pointless firl: sarge: for the makeup sex? Sarge: what is makeup sex? Sarge: :) firl: guess ont firl: not Vanyel: its sex you lie about having marcie: ahahahahahah Sarge: I used to have make up sex with my ex Sarge: but my wife doesn't believe in makeup sex Vanyel: jesus man Slayer: yes she does marcie: boring Slayer: oh wait, with you you mean firl: ahahah Vanyel: rofl Vanyel: i love you guys -- poor Sarge... Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2002 %% Cyrano: gay infantilist plumper porn Cyrano: goddamn, my toes are curling -- context? what context? Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 October 2002 %% Cyrano pictures leo on a Big Wheel Cyrano: hmmm Cyrano: a chopper big wheel Vanyel: ahahah Vanyel: YEAH! Cyrano: now that would be cool Cyrano: maybe some chrome Vanyel: when i was little,my bigwheel had a siren and a microphone on itr Cyrano: ahahahah Cyrano: triker gangs Cyrano: "it's our way or the driveway!" Vanyel: rofl -- Vanyel the thug Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2002 %% Vanyel: apparently my ass is the stuff of legends -- Vanyel: the man, the ass, the legend Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2002 %% firl: employment is for the weak -- firl with a Proclamation Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2002 %% *** ed is now known as ed saundo: and from the department of redundancy department... saundo: *** ed is now known as ed -- ed, confusing the masses Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 October 2002 %% *** Lia has entered room 'Main' Slayer snuggles lia Lia: um Lia: help -- Lia seeking assistance Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2002 %% Cyrano: we have a box by our xerox copier labeled "one sided paper" Cyrano: I dropped a moebius strip into it last month Cyrano: but I don't think anyone got the point. -- Cyrano the clever man Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2002 %% Cyrano: damnit Cyrano: 20 kilos of u235 could get us to pluto in a month Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: and we wouldnt need flashlights when we got there Cyrano: bah Vanyel: ahahah Cyrano: sigh Vanyel: whats up firl: he really wants to go to pluto Cyrano: it's so nice in the summer -- Cyrano on a mission Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2002 %% Cyrano: I had a dream once Cyrano: where I was making love to an 8 foot tall hershey kiss Cyrano: the chocolate thing runs deep -- Cyrano with an obsession Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 October 2002 %% Cyrano: in case you're wondering Cyrano: I was serious about the 8' hershey kiss marcie: i believe you Al: 8'...not 8" ? Cyrano: there's some serious symbolism there, but I don't think I'm ready to explore it Cyrano: yeah al Cyrano: chalk it up to too much lobster bisque before bed Lia: ok..... marcie: mmm lobster Al: huh? Al: what, was this a dream? Cyrano: yah Lia: no Al, Cyrano regularly fucks 8' hershey's kisses Vanyel: nothing that guy does at this point would suprise me Cyrano: I knew I'd regret that one Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- Cyrano, the man of many talents Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 October 2002 %% ed: I navigate traffic with vi keys -- ed on his editor of choice Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 October 2002 %% *** driving has been disconnected *** Cyrano has entered room 'Main' Vanyel: uh oh Vanyel: i was aobut to make a joke that you crashed. -- Cyrano making it out alive Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 October 2002 %% marcie: argh marcie: ARGH marcie: KILL IT marcie scrabbles for the mute button saundo: eh? marcie: that was close marcie: i almost heard "come on eileen" on the streaming radio station i'm listening to saundo: oh come on! marcie: now i have to get something else on quick saundo: dexy's midnight runners and their cool overalls marcie: before it lodges itself into my skull for the NEXT FUCKING WEEK saundo: ajhahahahah saundo: come on eileen marcie: it's just One Of Those Songs. saundo: oh i swear saundo: too-ra-loor-ra-lie IGadget: damn you both saundo: ahahahah marcie kicks saundo saundo bows marcie: i don't like you any more saundo: you. are. welcome. saundo: wait IGadget: hahahahaha saundo: i'm having a deja vu marcie: ahahhaaha marcie: okay okay marcie: it's revenge for "it's a small world" marcie: i know saundo: ahahah saundo: YES saundo: although saundo: frankly saundo: it's somewhat mismatched IGadget: well if you two keep this up, "i'd like to buy the world a coke" marcie: ahahah saundo: along the lines of offering a band-aid for a severed jugular marcie: tainted love!@ saundo: oooh saundo: sometimes i feel IGadget: house of the rising sun saundo: hey now saundo: there is. a house. in new. orleans. saundo: they call. the rising sun. marcie: heheheheeh saundo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH marcie: YEAH! marcie: SCORE! saundo: iiiiiiiii'm sailingaway marcie: okay, cartman saundo: marcie: YES IGadget: hotel california saundo: heh saundo: hey now saundo: hc is a classic saundo: i can tell you now, nothing beats that song playing as you wake up IGadget: yes but if you listen to it it becaoimes stuck too marcie: true that saundo: it could be worse saundo: three words - right said fred. *** sunbeam has been disconnected marcie: bwahahahah! marcie: you scared off sunny! saundo: i'm., too sexy for my car. saundo: too sexy by far saundo: marcie grins saundo: although the follow single was just as noxious saundo: deeply dippy 'bout your spanish thighs saundo: etc eetc marcie: heheh IGadget: Dressed up like gary coo-per, supa-dup-pa!" saundo: ARGH saundo punts IG saundo: i will NOT put on the ritz IGadget: TOUCH DOWN! marcie: ahahaha marcie: he shoots, HE SCORES! -- battle of the bands on EN! Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 October 2002 %% ed: if there is any fucking electronic device I hate more than the phone, it is printer ed: hell for me, well, the 3rd ring, anyway, would be having been banished to a room full of printers and having to maintain them for all of eternity -- ed honing his rage Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 October 2002 %% IG_z: al is going to be starring on the new home improvement *** IG_z is now known as IGadget IGadget: al's geek workshop co starring james and leo Al: "That's right, James. Today we're going to install a 19" telco rack in the guest bathroom. This will give us a place to hold the DNS slave and the decorative towels." cuinhell: hahahahahah IGadget: bwahahahah Al: I just pulled three tiles out of the lower rear corner of the tub. There were some gaps in the old caulk, and a lot of water has leaked through. *** firl has entered room 'Main' Al: there's a lot of rot in there Al: it's also not up to FCC Class B spec. -- Al's Old House Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 October 2002 %% firl: mmm ancient sumerian porn -- firl, a woman of discriminating tastes Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2002 %% DontKnow: yeah, multiple failed floppies suck. then again if all the floppies you are trying are 10 years old, you expect it. saundo: a 10 year old floppy? must. not. make. viagra. joke. Vanyel: ahahah Vanyel: oh man DontKnow: :P Vanyel: this laptop has like... 40 mb ram Slayer: granted they're formatted to C64 and contain what may be C64 marcie: are they... 8 inches? Slayer: no marcie: damn cuinhell: HAHAHA DontKnow: my oldest floppy in my apartment probably comes from 84-85. Slayer: 5.25 is as long as i've been able to go. marcie: figures. DontKnow: so only 18 yrs old. Slayer: well whatever saundo: marcie: are they... 8 inches? saundo: marcie: are they... 8 inches? saundo: marcie: are they... 8 inches? saundo: ahahahahahahha marcie: O:) saundo: oh marcie, you size queen marcie: that's me! marcie: i will now refrain from making a comment about the size of cynthia's breasts DontKnow: my floppy gets 8" when hard. and we all know that 3.5" floppies are "hard disks" marcie: oh wait, i did anyway saundo: ahahahahahahahahhahahahaha marcie: damn me saundo: ba dum ba ting! marcie bows -- damn dirty geeks! Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2002 %% Slayer: they should make nacho cheese flavored condoms saundo: ahahahah saundo: nacho cheese with tabasco lube saundo: a little heat with every stroke marcie: don't wake up jamez, dammit saundo: ahahahahah marcie: he'll make one, you know he will Slayer: i masturbated with tobasco sauce once Al: WHY? saundo: ITYM "he's made one". HTH, HAND marcie: i wish i could say that surprises me saundo: <-- me not looking surprised Slayer: because i dig a thrill Slayer: it was nice Slayer: for about 10 minutes marcie: heh Slayer: then it got to my balls -- Slayer giving new meaning to "hot sex" Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2002 %% firl: the porpoise has an interesting penis -- firl studying biology Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2002 %% Slayer: i'm getting a speces trasnplate Slayer: er Slayer: transplant Slayer: spieces Cyrano: heh Slayer: fuckit i quit -- Slayer's an animal! rowr! Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2002 %% Lia: bah Lia: we use this stuff called Taq in the lab Lia: it's about $180 for 500 uL Lia: excuse me, 200 uL Lia: anyway Lia: we got asome money, so we decided to buy 6 at a time and save a Lia: we got the box, and it was labeled as a "Taq Six Paq" Lia: that was almost too much to bear marcie: heh IGadget: shaq taq six paq? Lia: I guess if it was solf by Shaquille O'neal it would be a "Shaq Taq Six Paq" Lia: get OUT of my head IGadget IGadget: jynx Lia: :P IGadget: haha Al: shaq? ack! IGadget: that too Al: cut me some slack Lia: STOP! Al: why, do you fear an attack? Lia punts Al IGadget: from iraq? Al: no dice lia, I'll make you crack Al: but first, I'm hungrey IGadget: a six paq shaq taq from iraq? *** Al is now known as AlSnack Lia: marcie, are you getting this? Lia giggles marcie: you people scare me Lia: :> Lia: then stay baq Lia: *runs* IGadget: hahaha Xi: time to see if hostap drivers worked Xi: come on fakeAP IGadget: we should make a faq -- the attaq of the killer geeks Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2002 %% Cyrano: PG&E? Vanyel: someone wants me to interview for a job thjere Cyrano: ooooer. Vanyel: yeah Cyrano: dunno if I'd want to go too near a california power co. wob: yah really cuinhell: hehehe wob: your job will be running in a hampster wheel wob: attached to a generator Vanyel: thats what i;m afraid of cuinhell: and aqueaking cuinhell: squeaking wob: yes Vanyel: rinning ina hamster wheel wob: lots of squeaking Vanyel: with a laptop wob: yes. IGadget: what if there is a preatty woman running infront of you Vanyel: with lusers calling Vanyel: "RUN FASTER! MY LAPTOP NEEDS TO CHARGE!" -- Vanyel looking for a job change Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 October 2002 %% cuinhell: if I could generate power from masturbation I'd be able to disconnect from the grid -- the power of cuinhell! Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 October 2002 %% Vanyel: netscaoe crasgh in 5... 4...3...2...1 Vanyel: *crunch* saundo: ahahahaha saundo: and now, the core file deletion! DontKnow: touch core; cmod 000 core DontKnow: err chmod marcie: and for his next trick, vanyel will install solaris x86 on a p75! Vanyel: no Al: eew saundo: naked, with one foot in a bowl of jello, while singing "I'm too sexy" by right said fred -- Vanyel having Netscape problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 October 2002 %% DKsleep sniffs his own hands. nice smell. -- DK being freaky Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 October 2002 %% firl: so i used to get my hair cut from this place in the mall by me firl: from teh same guy each time firl: and every time i went he wouldn't remember me firl: or he would think i was someone else marcie: heh Slayer: that bastard firl: and so one time i went and i just went along with whatever he thought he rememberd about me firl: "chico state right?" firl: "oh yeah, graet school, got my MA in education there" firl: etc etc marcie: ahahaha firl: and i went on lying throughout the whole haircut firl: and then half way through it marcie: sweet firl: when my hair is half cut and all up in clips firl: i had a frightening thought firl: what if he's cutting my hair the way some OTHER chick likes her hair cut firl: because he thinks I"M her?! marcie: HAHAHAHAHAH -- firl being scared Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 November 2002 %% firl: i am too salty marcie: allow me to correct that saundo: ahahahhaah marcie: (cue the salt lick jokes) saundo: marcie, and her tongue of cleanliness marcie: that's RIGHT saundo: it is a public service firl: i feel like that one guy in that 'damn salty ham" sketch from kkids in the hall marcie: yes marcie: yes it is saundo: and the servicing will be in public firl: hehe marcie: it's a tough job, but someone has to do it saundo: and thank $DEITY for you marcie *sniff* marcie: yeah. saundo: stoic little tropper, always going the extra 6" for the rest of us saundo: taking the hard jobs when noone else will lick marcie soldiers on, a single tear tracking down her cheek saundo: ladies and gentleman, a noble bast...ion of the US of A - marcie saundo leads the applause marcie strikes a pose saundo pours melted chocolate on marcie marcie: ahh, i love being me. saundo: it's for the fans, marcie *** Manuka has been disconnected marcie: yes, i AM a role model marcie signs autographs marcie: ...with my TONGUE! marcie: ha! saundo: i intend making lifesize sculptures of you in chocolate to leave around the nation marcie: excellent saundo: so that truly, the entire nation can take a bite out of you and eat you marcie: you big tease. saundo: true saundo: guilty as charged marcie: and now, for something completely different marcie: beer. saundo: ahahahah saundo: that's not different saundo: that's more of the same marcie: fwell, true marcie: it's more the same saundo: ya know, i have some pale upstairs hiding in the fridge marcie: GODDAMMIT ZAUNDO marcie: stop THAT RIGHT NOW saundo: jes? saundo: i am stopping the what now? marcie: peeking into my brain. saundo: thinking? or the lack of drinking beer? saundo: ah saundo: no :-) marcie: damn you -- ah, Friday nights... Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 November 2002 %% Cyrano: I am getting terrible M C Hammer flashbacks Cyrano: mostly involving very weird pants -- Cyrano with a problem Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 November 2002 %% Cyrano: te var a gustar este libro. firl: cual libro? Cyrano: cui bono marcie: thingy -- marcie, the linguistic expert Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 November 2002 %% IGadget: I have magnets on my fridge too, but they came from harddrives, and Icant get them off Vanyel: rofl -- IGadget the nerd Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 2002 %% afk_ed: THE INTERNET: yes, you can live without it. Al: hahahahah marcie: impossible! afk_ed: THE INTERNET: what the fuck ever happened to E-anything? marcie: hahahah afk_ed: THE INTERNET: opening your pocketbook to more fraud than ever! Vanyel: IT WON'T PRINT! afk_ed: THE INTERNET: Yes, you should be afraid. IGadget: the internet: what do you do when the light sgo out? marcie: "bringing the world to your desktop, and your desktop... to the world!" afk_ed: THE INTERNET: no, not the innerweb, THE INTERNET IGadget: marcie: hahah afk_ed: THE INTERNET: Yes, you should kill yourself because people *still* don't care Vanyel: god Vanyel: I want these. Al: take'em Al: they're more fun when shared afk_ed: THE INTERNET: billions of dollars, millions of clued minds, all for you to hear "You've got Mail" afk_ed: THE INTERNET: what happened to archie;gopher;usenet;uudeview;real porn marcie: go ed afk_ed: THE INTERNET: *gahhh* lusers everywhere. afk_ed: THE INTERNET: Yes, its always going to be slow. afk_ed: THE INTERNET: Full of more worthless bullshit than ever! Al: THE INTERNET: Shut the fuck up and go play with your Xbox! DontKnow: theinternet: it isn't just for breakfast anymore Vanyel: the internet: if youre afk, be afk, otherwise shut up and go eat afk_ed: THE INTERNET: brought to you by Bill Gates! cuinhell: THE INTERNET: Ass. afk_ed: goddamit *** afk_ed is now known as ed Vanyel: ahahahah -- the internet is the FUTURE! Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 2002 %% Vanyel: oh fuck Vanyel: I accidentally downloaded Vanyel: the free software song Al applauds Vanyel: now i must repartition and reformat this drive marcie: ahahah Al: AHAHHAHAHAHA Vanyel: luckelly i cauight it before I played it Al: screw you mr wget! Vanyel: I might have had to set the harddrive on fire -- Vanyel being careful Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 November 2002 %% Cyrano: ~ marcie: home, james! marcie slaps her knee marcie: god i'm so funny Cyrano: har. marcie: you know you love it DontKnow: cd ~marcie; ls -la DontKnow: yes we did Cyrano: now now Cyrano: it's not polite to -l Cyrano: and some women out there would slap you for the -a marcie: heheh DontKnow: what? -- DK just doesn't get it Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2002 %% Vanyel: wub wubba vou, balublaba blno -- Vanyel speaking in tongues Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 November 2002 %% Cyrano: reality is an approximation of the Math. Vanyel: reality is an approximation of my ass. Cyrano: that explains the "black hole" theory Cyrano: and superinflation. Vanyel: speaking of Vanyel: I just pharted cuinhell: superstink theory -- the geeks discussing asstronomy Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 November 2002 %% firlafk: as if things couldn't get any weierder in here, there's a guy wearing an aluminum hat -- firl's classmates fleeing the aliens Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 2002 %% Vanyel: you know how sometimes, you goof around, looking like you're busy while you're really not? wob: that's an artform Cyrano: are you describing my marriage or my work? -- Cyrano, that slacker Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 2002 %% Vanyel: I've got it Vanyel: great new fundraser Vanyel: somewhat along the linds of a dunk tank Vanyel: buyt you can do this online Vanyel: set cyrano up with a webcam Vanyel: and a 100 volt electrode Vanyel: let him sit there and pun away Vanyel: and you can paypal $10 to a charity Vanyel: and then get to shock him after he puns, for each donation -- Vanyel's had enough Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 2002 %% sunbeam: kyle is cute Slayer: kyle isn't a real name Vanyel: kyle is a fag's name Cyrano: hey Cyrano: plus Slayer: kyle is something you name your son when you wish you'd had a girl Cyrano: then we could sing the "kyle's mom is a big fat bitch" song sunbeam: i could name him beauregard and call him beau for short sunbeam: ok ok forget kyle -- sunbeam on what to name her kid Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% sunbeam: my first love was travis mckelvy sunbeam: then i got caught holding hands with daniel pasatero on the bus and he broke up with me Cyrano: slut. sunbeam: it would be the model for all of my relationships until now -- sunbeam regarding her grade-school crush Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% Lia: OK van Lia: maybe you can answer this Vanyel: i can try. Lia: is it normal for jewish people to be so damn morbid and pessimistic? Vanyel: yes. Lia: ok, just checking -- oy vey vanyel! Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% Moni: sick and perverted.. best of both worlds -- Moni enjoying herself Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% Moni: four women is enough for two jello wrestling teams Al: *perk* Moni: never mind -- Moni not interested any more Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% wob: "i have high latency into your network" wob: gee thanks wob: that tells me a lot wob: course it aint our network wob: According to WHOIS/ARIN, the entire 66.62.0.0/16 block is owned by wob: TouchAmerica... wob: -Matt- wob: and thats where hes having the problem wob: STUPID FUCK WE ARE NOT TOUCH AMERICA marcie: heheh Sarge: no I'm sure it's your segment wob.. it has to be cuinhell: no, you are Touch Monkey -- touch wob's monkey. Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% Cyrano: one... two... three... four... donut... -- Cyrano on racking equipment while stoned Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% Vanyel: I have to put something in the hole directly below -- Vanyel on his equipment Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2002 %% Vanyel: ROMANCE MATHEMATICS Vanyel: Smart man + smart woman = romance Vanyel: Smart man + dumb woman = affair Vanyel: Dumb man + smart woman = marriage Vanyel: Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy -- Vanyel speaks truth Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 November 2002 %% Vanyel: HOLY SHIT! Vanyel: !!!!! Vanyel: MY COMPUTER! Vanyel: ITS BROADCASTING AN INTERNET IP ADDRESS! marcie: ahahahah Vanyel: SOMEONE CAN USE THIS TO BEGIN ATTACKING MY COMPUTER!@$#!@$#!@#$ marcie: gotta love the popups Vanyel runs around in circles marcie throws water on vanyel Vanyel: AHHHHHH Vanyel: thanks. Al: van's cruising pr0n sites marcie: settle down, beavis! Vanyel: I needed that. -- Vanyel panicking over pop-up ads Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 November 2002 %% Cyrano: if you mashed a banana over a 100 cm^2 area Cyrano: you would exceed the radioactive contamination limits Lia: you scare me -- Cyrano expressing admiration for bananas Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 2002 %% Lia: fine I'll go mkae dinner Slayer: make me some dinner, bitch Lia: tarragon chicken pasta Slayer: oh hell yeah Lia: I'll send you the recipe -- Lia being liberated Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 November 2002 *** sunbeam has been disconnected Frayed: This is my entire relationship with sunbeam Frayed: *** sunbeam has been disconnected -- Frayed pining for sunbeam Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 November 2002 %% Moni: I didn't even fast for the High Holy Days Moni: I have this nasty habit of passing out if I don't eat every 4 hours firl: i have a nasty habit of wanting to kill people if I dont eat every 4 hours Vanyel: I have this nasty habit of wanting to kill people. -- King Jewey is a bad man! Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 November 2002 %% ed: hopefully, in another 5 years, I can have kill just be a named pipe to my colocated suicidal bomber midgets initialization script. Al: suicide bomber midgets! marcie: hahahaha marcie: YEAH!' marcie: SUICIDE BOMBER MIdGETS! ed: thats what I'm talkin about. marcie: now THAT'S a band name. ed: I think i'd named them ed: Butch ed: Charlie (bronson) ed: Clint ed: Abib ed: abib would be the one with tactical nukes strapped to his stumpy little legs. ed: he would wear a turban marcie: awesome. ed: and cry "with allahs help I will remove you from the genepool" firl: oh my ed: Karen The Midget, would be only for emergency deploy ed: through careful chemical manipulation, she would remain in a constant state of PMS. ed: she would be issued only a butter knife and a cisco cat-o-8-tails Al: thing is...that might get expensive...you'd have to like feed them or something before deploying them...perhaps hyenas or coydogs would be more economically viable...? ed: well ed: I intend to place my AMidget datacenter next to a macdonalds ed: we will life off f the refuse from the fast foo dindustry. ed: well, by we, I mean "they" Al: shit...if you're going to do that you won't need the nukes ed: good nutrition is not important for a bomber midget Al: just let them drop trou and shit on the offending luser ed: I could also colocate "Flatulence" next to a bush's beans plant. ed: he, of course ed: would be minio-me sized Al: there ya go ed: so one could drop ship him in a UsPS prio envelope ed: give him a leatherman ed: he saws his way out at cusotmers site ed: and begins to emit stench Al: screw the leatherman, give him a small chainsaw ed: he will also be deployed with a return addressed envelope and 10.00 in quarters, and a tube sock, in which to place the quarters. Al: let him evoke more fear Al: quartersock! hahah marcie: aw jeah. ed: see ed: I have this all planned out. ed: they would all carry the Avalon Networks Midget Force logo ed: little polo's marcie: hahah ed: and purple/blue/grey/white camo pants ed: all coudl be stand-in SA's marcie: and little teeny berets -- ed planning his future crew Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 November 2002 %% Cyrano: give a man a fish, and he'll follow you around for scraps. teach a man to fish, and he'll call you for tech support. -- Cyrano the wise Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 2002 %% Jake: HEX THOSE BITCHES Jake: MOTHERFUCKERS *** Xi has entered room 'Main' china: http://spellsandmagic.com/blackmagic.html AlFK: given the choice, I'd rather have sex than hex. *** AlFK is now known as Al Al flexes his pex Al: I'm sure no one objex Al: it's just words that I wrex *** Xi has left the room marcie: you scared off xi. -- Al following in K's footsteps Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 November 2002 %% Vanyel: "people all over the world, join hands..." Vanyel: AND THROW THESE FUCKING YUPPIE FUCKS OVER A FUCKING DAM -- Vanyel loving the Christmas ads Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2002 %% firl: shopping at old navy is like garanamals for grownups -- firl on fashion Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2002 %% Vanyel: argh Vanyel: i ficuking hate my phone wob: THEN STRIKE IT DOWN marcie: USE YOUR RAGE AND HATRED wob: FEEL THE HATE FLOW THROUGH YOU Vanyel: uhm Vanyel: I just let it ring to voicemail -- Vanyel being tutored in the dark side Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2002 %% Moni: nothing says sexy like an eel -- Moni being a sexy girl Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2002 %% Vanyel: you kno Vanyel: steven spielberg is doing TV movies now Vanyel: he's becoming some kind of jewish folklore warning to children everywhere Moni: ya.. a 20 hour mimiseries marcie: heheh Vanyel: "Eat your spinich, or you'll become a spielberg! Vanyel: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! -- oy vey! Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2002 %% ed: mahahah wob sucks dweez dweez splooges wob gets a toothpick china: you guys are the queerest bunch of breeders I've ever seen in my life -- "Queer As Eagle's Nest" Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2002 %% Moni: wob..why is your sleep mask in my pants wob: idk moni, you tell me Moni: hmm Moni: mysteries of the universe wob: yes wob: i cannot explain these things. -- wob and moni, mystified Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 December 2002 %% Vanyel: and why didnt solaris 8 ask for a default gateway? Cyrano: why would it? Cyrano: routing is for the weak. -- Cyrano the Evil Overlord Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 December 2002 %% Cyrano: curious george and the buzzsaw Vanyel: curious george and the unlocked reactor access door Vanyel: part II of which would be, King Kong -- ideas for new kids' books Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 December 2002 %% Cyrano: just think of a cow as a slightly more mobile head of lettuce Cyrano: with comparable intelligence -- Cyrano advising sunbeam on vegetarianism Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 December 2002 %% sunbeam: it's days like today i wish i were gay sunbeam: i've got one sitting on the couch eating with his mouth open, and the other one eating everything that will fit in his mouth sunbeam: if I were a lesbian i wouldn't have to deal with this marcie grins sunbeam: and i wouldn't be pregnant either sunbeam: and even if I were, at least I'd have a woman around instead of the moron-a-thon I live with marcie laughs marcie: i feel your pain, honey. sunbeam: the more I think about it, the more I really wish i were a lesbian Vanyel: *sighs* marcie: come to the dark side. firl: uh oh marcie: ;) firl: getting your recruitment quota for the month, finally marcie: yeah, its' about damn time sunbeam: i wish i would've went to the darkside 5 years ago marcie: i'm behind this month firl: well, at least you'll be entered into the drawing this month firl: it's a good prize Vanyel: cera Vanyel: give hima sorgeons mask marcie: yeah, i hear we're getting a genuine leather cover for our gay agenda! firl: ahahah sunbeam: hahaha -- sunbeam being recruited Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 December 2002 %% Cyrano: as performance art, Barney isn't bad -- Cyrano going mad Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 December 2002 %% marcie: well ed Vanyel: ahahehe ed marcie: this is a state agency ed: "well ed" ed: christ marcie: let them try :) ed: who are you, DK for a day? marcie: oh god marcie: i must relaly be sleepy marcie: pardon me ed: mahahah marcie: my brain obviously is offline ;) Vanyel: your brain is in a twisty maze of sexual predators Vanyel: all alike marcie: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH -- Vanyel inspiring feer Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2002 %% Vanyel: i've sick of fucking jumpstart Vanyel: I woke up this morning Vanyel: and my openboot prom in my brain went Vanyel: boot net - wakeup -- Vanyel working wayyyy too much Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2002 %% Vanyel: xxxcopy Vanyel: copy only your porn -- Vanyel with a variant on the xcopy command Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2002 %% Cyrano: next to the exhaust vent of a dual CPU ss20 is a great place to dry things Cyrano: I could harness the power of my computer room to dry fruit -- Cyrano discovering new uses for old hardware Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2002 %% Jake: bring me the head of yahoo serious! ed: yes! ed: I second that ed: jake needs hair ideas -- ed and Jake being fashionable Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 December 2002 %% Jim: Would Solaris 8 run on a Sparc 4? ed: yes marcie: very slowly ed: slowly, yes. ed: painfully, yes. marcie: but marcie: it will run :) ed: this is perfect for a lusers dekstop ed: you must do it Vanyel: yeah ed: and report back to us Jake: DO IT Jake: NOW -- ed and Jake being customer-oriented Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 December 2002 %% marcie: 0000000CCCCCC0 marcie: whoa marcie: that was weird firl: do it again! marcie: 0000000CCCCCC0 firl: awww yeah marcie grins firl: you know how I like it! marcie flexes sunbeam: hahaha wob: and me without my camera firl: you miss all the best photo ops marcie: i'm telling ya firl: EN WebCam! wob: yeah. wob: cmon firl lets do a kegstand braless wob: you know you'll love it firl: as long as its good beer -- setting up the EN WebCam Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 December 2002 %% sirsyko: are you guys actually racist, or is that joking around :) marcie: ss, we hate everyone equally here Cyrano: turn into sysadmins Cyrano: must be the racial tolerance for pain & stupidity wob: syko wob: hehe marcie: we hate kikes, spics, niggers, wops, wetbacks, fags, dykes (hi!) and crackers marcie: it's a beautiful thing, really :) Cyrano: but idiots most of all wob: yeah marcie: yes wob: lusers. Cyrano: mmm wob: <-- kike Cyrano: hot chocolate marcie: those are the only people we're really prejudices against marcie: <-- rug-muncher wob: <-- fake mexican wob: hehe sirsyko: <-- wop wob: aand there ya go Cyrano <= dirty california hippie wob: hehehehaha wob: yes marcie: right on! wob: so there you go -- people of EN, join hands... Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2002 %% Cyrano: best part, a 5000 pipe organ in a 10'x15' room Cyrano: sounds like the second coming of christ when it fires up -- Cyrano being descriptive Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2002 %% Slayer: do you feel? do you feel like i do? i want to fuck you. marcie: no, no, and hell no firl: heh Slayer: fuck you then marcie: i already told you no wob: owned marcie: werd -- wob admiring marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2002 %% Cyrano: remember the VAlinux business plan? Cyrano: 1. Linux Cyrano: 2. Blue LED Cyrano: 3. uhhh...profit! -- Cyrano reminiscing about the good ol' days Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2002 %% Moni: Fiji firl: fudgy Vanyel: fijass meg: fungi Moni: schrooms marcie: bah cuinhell: brooms Vanyel: fuck. firl: duck cuinhell: suck. firl: this is fun! firl: hehe Vanyel: dumb cuinhell: fuck meg: knob cuinhell: lick meg: stick marcie: burn firl: fire! cuinhell: STD Moni: slayer marcie: hee Moni: haw cuinhell: hawt firl: haute Moni: cuisine cuinhell: cuisinart Moni: bloody cuinhell: tampon Moni: ewww cuinhell: moni's toe firl: pus Moni: pain cuinhell: vicodin Moni: want cuinhell: to win lottery firl: higher tax bracket cuinhell: two chicks at once meg: ahah -- playing the word association game Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2002 %% saundo: FUCK corporate america saundo: with the Barbed Wire Dildo and Butt Plug of Enlightenment -- saundo being a loyal corporate drone Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 December 2002 %% saundo: anyhoo, enough sunshine and joy saundo: back to the nude midgets wob: yawn saundo: see? saundo: you mention nude midgets and people wake up -- saundo getting everyone's attention Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 December 2002 %% Jake: you ever look at the back of a dollar bill Jake: ON WEED -- Jake making discoveries Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2002 %% Vanyel: youfugga. Jake: fucking ed Jake: take some ritalin Jake: or rant Jake: no fucking around ed: shut up bitch ed: I'm watching enterprise ed: when I'm done with that, I'll rant your fuckin cunt. Jake: fucking pussy Jake: watching watered down filth ed: shut fuckin up you fraggle bitch Jake: silence Jake: I know what crap looks like *** marcafk is now known as marcie marcie: bitch fight! bitch fight! -- marcie getting back just in time Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2002 %% Slayer: the smallpox vaccine is supposed to kill 1 in a million people. bush says he'll volunteer to take the first one. wouldn't it be funny if he's the first 1 in a million? Vanyel: i'd believe in god, if that happined. -- Vanyel getting religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2002 %% Al-ive: *sneeze* Xi: INCOMING! Al-ive: my nose is a threat only to myself -- Al reassuring us all Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2002 %% Slayer: ifyou're having trouble with your barnyard friends... if you've got a thing for ewes... Slayer: dirty deeds done with sheep Slayer: dirty deeds, little bo peep sunbeam: you're so wierd Slayer: must be why all the women want me firl: yup. thats it for sure. sunbeam: something like that marcie: mm hmm. -- the women reassuring Slay Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 December 2002 %% firl: i thought we had a talk Vanyel: we probably did Vanyel: but since the topic didnt involve sex or food, I probably just ignored you firl: next time i'll know (breast) better how to keep (pizza) your attention Vanyel: yep Vanyel: see its not so hard firl: i'll work at it -- Vanyel teaching firl to communicate Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 December 2002 %% ed: where are you heading for holidays? ed: you're a wuss for not driving across the country.. ed: c'mon. ed: all those hours..with kids. ed: rent a uhaul, place kids in it. ed: thats gotta be legal in some states -- ed chastising Cyrano for flying Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 December 2002 %% Cyrano: look for an app called "vortex" Cyrano: 2 of my friends wrote it for OS 7, should still work with 9 Cyrano: will delete anything regardless of locks or usage Cyrano: drag the system file to it and very odd things start happening marcie: bwahahaha -- Cyrano on the mysteries of the Mac Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 December 2002 %% Sarge: TIMMAH! cuinhell: Two Towers at 12:30 today Al: two timmahs Sarge: The fellowship of TIMMAH! Al: the TIMMAH of the rings Cyrano: the sum of all beers. cuinhell: Ass With The Wind Sarge: Harry Potter and the Chamber of TIMMAH! Al: hairy pooter Cyrano: Harry Pothead and the Sorcer is Stoned. Cyrano: +er Al: haha Cyrano: harry potter and the vibrating broomstick Al: homer potter and the...mmm, donuts! Sarge: 007: Between the sheets cuinhell: Homey Potter and the Stanky Bitches Sarge: Horny Potter and the Bed Chamber of Sluts -- future movie classics Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 December 2002 %% Al: you're gonna hack auggie? ed: yes marcie: ahahah ed clickety click ed: I'm in! ed: rewt was "fat.farm" marcie: HAHAHAHHAHA -- ed being 'l33t Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 December 2002 %% marcie: this has to be the strangest spam mail i've ever gotten marcie: 126 Dec 19 TalkingTP (5478) Toilet Paper That Talks -On Sale Now! sunbeam: sweet marcie: yeah :D cuinhell: the pontificating pooper -- cuinhell being clever Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2002 %% marcie: argh marcie: my uterus just hates me cuinhell: the unruly uterus *** sunbeam has been disconnected marcie: yeah cuinhell: your uterus killed sunny marcie: i am just that good. -- marcie wielding her powerful uterus Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2002 %% DontKnow: and on the netscape.com download page for 7.0 it says "All NEW Netscape 7.0 - Netscape's FASTEST browser!" cuinhell: Yugo's FASTEST car! -- cuinhell, a man of taste Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2002 %% meg: woo meg: goo goo gajobob meg: jooba jobba meg: joooba jooba meg: SMOKE POT EVERYOBYD SMOKE POT -- m3g just says no! Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2002 %% Vanyel: my dog has a new pastime Vanyel: farting on the couch in my face saundo: two words - cigarette lighter saundo: the puppy blue flame of enlightenment Vanyel: ahahhaha -- saundo giving advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 December 2002 %% Sarge: I think that show needs a good hot lesbian scene between willow and buffy Sarge: all nude of course Sarge: or just willow parading around nude would be fine too marcie: and then the big scary butch dyke breaks down your door and does you with a strapon marcie: that would be the best part. Marianne: ahahahaha -- marcie correcting Sarge's fantasy life Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2002 %% marcie: Anyway, hope you have a dandy Christmas. Peace out, homeskillet. marcie: Luv, marcie: Brad the Brave marcie holds her head and shakes it back and forth, muttering marcie: my brother is so WEIRD! Sarge: homeskillet? marcie: i know! -- marcie lamenting her family ties Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2002 %% *china* It's just a terrible shame that no matter what personality is he utilizing at any given moment, he is just not, in any way, shape or form, funny. china> *snork* china> *wipes up her keyboard* china> There's another one you owe me. :) -- China and marcie on a certain EN user Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2002 %% Al: sarge, it's time to promote you Al: you are no longer NTboy Al: now you are TNGboy marcie: heheheh Slayer: no no Slayer: he's gotta start out as DS9boy and work his way up china: unification, slay Al: OUCH! Al: slay with the put-down Slayer: DS9, the Highlander II of the star trek universe -- Slay with the score Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2002 %% marcie spins up "The Immaculate Collection" and goes to work on a spreadsheet Al: that music's for bedsheets not spreadsheets! -- Al with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2002 %% ed: nothing pisses me off more than seeing a goldmine of shit I want to steal and having it be unreachable. -- ed on peer-to-peer filesharing Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2002 %% Jake: its has the 2 things that make any movie good Jake: midgets and chimps -- Jake on "Bowling For Columbine" Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 December 2002 %% Jake: goddamnit van Jake: DRINK Jake: DRINK Vanyel: i am! Jake: DRINK Jake: I AM TURNING ON THE OVERN Jake: DRINK Slayer: take your dick out of his mouth, jake. give him a chance. -- Jake being overly enthusiastic Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 December 2002 %% Vanyel: common courtsey says that cremation shouldnt be the CAUSE of death -- Vanyel with etiquette advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 December 2002 %% Al: there's only so much oxygen to go around Al: these people are wasting it -- Al on stupid people Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% marcie: Then I watched the rest of the tape. There is a very disturbing part where my father is sitting in a chair looking madly happy and sort of dancing along, and then it pans across the room to marcie: show what he is looking at, and he is watching Mary Poppins and dancing to the Mary Poppins music. I think he may have some sort of fetish but I am not sure. saundo: marcie: you're freaking me out marcie: O:) saundo: and worse than that, you're enjoying freaking me out marcie: of course i am. Vanyel: mmm freak. marcie: i live for it. saundo: it is your quest marcie: it is marcie: how did you know? saundo: i read it in a fortune cookie saundo: and I when I appended "in bed" to it, I knew it was about you, marcie marcie: yes. marcie: very good, my son. -- saundo attaining wisdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% ed: one that I ranted to a.t.s.r ed: was the lusers that called to sighn up for an acct ed: and they wouldn't give me a password. ed: "Lisa, don't give them our password, they said you're not supposed to give that out." ed: "Bob, you talk to them." ed: "Yea, we aren't givin you our password, they said we aren't supposed to." ed: I was stunned by the stupidity ed: for a full 10 seconds. Cyrano: lol ed: the guy actually said "Hello?" ed: I couldn't get them to see the idiocy. ed: In the end they never signed up for an account ed: and I even *tried* to give them a password. ed: "No, thats not our password." Cyrano: classy ed: I was again rebuffed by stupidity. -- ed on his favorite lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% Cyrano: some people may be too stupid to live Cyrano: I've been rethinking my position on this ed: hmm ed: my position has been "some people are too stupid to live." ed: and.. ed: further, "they only live because we support them." Cyrano: so Cyrano: what we do ed: its not as vulgar as just outright killing them Cyrano: have the govt issue an order that all citizens should be sterilized ed: its more like you take away the shit that keeps them alive. Cyrano: those of us smart enough to see past the farce will avoid it Cyrano: then we load them all onto the "B" Ark ed: mahaha ed: the one with hairdressers and people of that ilk? Cyrano: telephone sanitizers marcie: telephone sanitizer second class! Cyrano: but we have to keep a few of them around just for the entertainment value Al: they only live because it is illegal to kill them -- plans for world domination Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% Cyrano wonders if it's possible to analyze for alcohol intoxication via a semen sample Cyrano: would at least be a bit more fun -- Cyrano on preventing drunk driving Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% Cyrano: you want some entertaining reading Cyrano: try alt.suicide.holiday Cyrano: it's hilarious Cyrano: people trying to come up with good suicide techniques Cyrano: 100% chickenshits through and through, and pretty far down on the intelligence scale marcie: i always wondered about a.s.h. marcie: why does it even exist if everyone who frequents the group wants to kill themselves? Cyrano: they don't marcie: wouldn't that preclude having regular posters? marcie: :) Cyrano: it's all a mass pathetic craving for attention Cyrano: see, if they were serious about it, they'd publish a roster of names and addresses Cyrano: hell, the snuff guys would take care of them, and probably even for free. marcie: ahahahaha ed: mahahaha Cyrano: we have got to get those two together marcie: match made in heaven! marcie: so to speak -- Cyrano on Usenet Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% Cyrano: that's what I recommend to leo for stereo protection Cyrano: dashboard mounted suicide bomber midgets Cyrano: activated with the car alarm marcie: yeah! ed: shit ed: no need to activate ed: just pay a fuckin psychotic midget to ride around in your car/live in your car ed: he has an altima ed: lots of trunkspace/backspeet space Al: "pay" ? ed: he can just build a little midget efficiency in thee. ed: right ed: "You can live here for free, use the stero, etc.." ed: "If something gets stolen, I sell you to the zoo." marcie: "just make sure you piss *out* the window" ed: "No, not for an exhibit of your own, you get to be the adolescent male red-assmonkey fuck toy." ed: you issue him a certificate for 1 free lethal item from your local army surplus ed: and you let him move in and begin setting up shop ed: here where it gets cold, 2 good things ed: 1) little fucker could remote-start your car. Cyrano: heheh ed: 2) he could hold your coffee/go get your coffee in the morning. ed: and fill your car with gas. Cyrano: and hey Al: what's to prevent him from stealing the car? Cyrano: you could always use the carpool lanes! ed: "If we don't have gas, it gets mighty cold in here." ed: you mount 2 tasers to his nuts marcie: shit yeah! Jake: shock collar prevents from anything you like ed: which are then tied to the car alarm ed: that Cyrano: mmm ed: and you'd have to get references for your psycho midget Cyrano: ed, I want to live in your world ed: I'm not saying you should just take the first onethat comes along ed: and ed: you shouldn't find them at walmart ed: you need to look at like target, maybe dillards. ed: "Hey, little guy, do you need a home? ed: " ed: "Uh, yea, no puppies, or whatever it is you guys have.." marcie: make sure he can be rack-mounteed ed: right ed: litlte tTi tabs implanted in his hips ed: you could solve the piss problem by just putting a catheter in ed: and make sure his asshole is sewn shut marcie: ewww marcie: shit-filled midgets are nobody's friend, ed. ed: well ed: they're good urban assault weapons. ed: you could chuck him into traffic ed: he'd also be a good excuse to get out of meetings. marcie: cynthia makes a good point Cyrano: maybe we're looking at this wrong marcie: cloning is possible ed: 'uh, yea, my midget isn't feeling well, look at him!" marcie: you can clone your midget self. Cyrano: maybe the real money is in midget temp services Cyrano: "rent-a-midget" marcie: mini-me! Cyrano: er ed: hmm Cyrano: "Mini-Mine" ed: I dunno if I'd like a mini-me marcie: i think that would be funny. marcie: a mini-ed. ed: I'd have to bitchslap the little fucker. marcie: he'd bitchslap you back. ;) ed: he could keep track of your email too. ed: cerberal implant. ed: he could be your eyes ed: and you could just sit and control him with a remote. ed: send him to work instead of you. marcie: generally i like it. marcie: hmm. ed: be like in running man marcie: he could do my tape rotation for me. ed: you could have some shi strapped to his neck Cyrano: yeah! marcie: hell, i could clone a midget just for tapes! Cyrano: I bet they'd be cheaper than tape stackers ed: he'd die if he ran outside of the invisible fence you buried in your yard marcie: he could live in the jukebox! ed: shit ed: he could live in the stacker! marcie: see!@ marcie: ed and i think alike. ed: hmm ed: you could issue him with spare DLT drives ed: and he could do all the preventative maint marcie: yeah! ed: again, electrodes attached to his nuts may be in order. marcie: i like this idea. ed: "faster" ed: *bzzzt* marcie: so we can do more important work marcie: like marcie: talking on EN marcie: and marcie: eating krispy kremes. ed: or, to his clitoris. ed: depending on his gender. ed: and when I say his, I mean like s/he marcie: obviously. ed: right ed: because thats how every book should be ed: s/he Cyrano: hookermidgets ed: hmm. ed: ther could be a roving industry for midget support ed: eg: midget sexual needs. marcie: midget clones ed: midget emotional fulfillment. marcie: like in AI marcie: only... smaller. marcie: hey, don't laugh marcie: i have a midget friend from college marcie: who just married another midget. marcie: they're very hapy together. ed: sweet marcie: :) ed: midget sex. ed: I bet thats wild Cyrano: have to keep him in shape ed: the fuckin best part is. Cyrano: Midgetcise! marcie: i try not to think about it, ed. ed: if you were married midgets ed: you could fuckin live cheap ed: yo ucould move into an efficiency marcie: yah! Cyrano: heh ed: live in a dogbed ed: you'd eat 1/2 has much, atleast. ed: you could *live in a fucking car* marcie: true that. marcie: hell ed: and protect the possesions contained therein. marcie: live in a van Cyrano: heh Cyrano: an RV would be a palace ed: find your midget friend. marcie: you'd have it all hooked up! ed: ask her if this is reasonable. marcie: i have a feeling she'd be highly insulted :) marcie: they have an apartment ed: she may find the clitoral electrodes and the hip-implants objectionable marcie: but i do nawt know the specs thereof ed: prolly less than 1000square ed: fuck ed: you could live in a closet marcie: low counters, etc Cyrano: ed, you bastard ed: I'll sublet out my closet Cyrano: that's the fourth keyboard this year marcie grins ed: mahaha Cyrano: I need to switch to membranes marcie: yes marcie: yes you do Al: just get a damn dustcover ed: you need a midget to clean up after you ed: and/or see to your daily during-work sexual needs. ed: some days I'd love to have a little midget under my desk workin it for me. Cyrano: ahhh marcie: perfect size for under-the-desk activities! marcie: ahahahhaha ed: you just need that sort of stress reliever marcie: !!! Cyrano: that could help a lot with productivity Cyrano: hey Cyrano: tie it to a helpdesk system Cyrano: so every time you close a ticket... marcie: HAHAHAHHAA ed: "Watch out lil-guy don't get any of that in your eyes." marcie: that's an initiative i can get behind! ed: then you'd have midget osha ed: you'd have to put lights under there. Cyrano: and niosh Cyrano: hm ed: there'd be issues with mexican for lunch, etc.. marcie: ahahah Cyrano: would they be hourly or exempt? *** zag has left the room ed: exempt marcie: if we have to be exempt, so do they ed: they'd live off of crumbs Cyrano: naah ed: they'd be like corporate equipment marcie: pet midgets Cyrano: they should be like waitresses Cyrano: live off of tips ed: not so much like the cogs in the wheel that we are. ed: more like the goo inbetween the cogs. ed: you may need to have them de-teethed. ed: I hear midget bites can be nasty. marcie: not if they're the same midgets guarding your car marcie: you need them to have sharp pointy fangs marcie: to gnaw the fingers off would-be car thieves. ed: hmm Cyrano: so ed: and, technically, you should have a good relationship with your car midget. Cyrano: what would a midget pack ed: swallowing your love juice is part of that relationship. Cyrano: I'm thinking small caliber ed: snub .38 at the largest ed: I'd say like a .25 marcie: yeah marcie: .22 marcie: short barrel ed: or Cyrano: twin gyrojets :) marcie: they can plug people at close range marcie: in the knees ed: issue them ryphenlol Cyrano: tranq darts ed: see ed: their job may be to get the car/theif to an out of the way area ed: so you can show up and finish the job. marcie: yeah Cyrano: how about blinding lasers? marcie: disable them momentarily ed: a swine bag cutter Cyrano: an elastrator ed: that'd leave a bloody mess. Cyrano: 101 things to do with a 0.75" diameter rubber band marcie: heheheh Cyrano: and a bovine speculum Cyrano: the nice ones ratchet and then lock like vice grips Cyrano: very clasy Cyrano: +s marcie: ow. ed: ok ed: I must go. *** ed is now known as afked afked: later marcie: going to rent your car midget? afked: they're flying off the shelves marcie: wr0d marcie: later Cyrano: maybe a small tactical nuclear device Cyrano: it's probably a good thing I don't have one marcie: most definitely. Al: "probably" ? Cyrano: because if I did, I just know I'd have to set it off to see what would happen Al: hehehe -- midget mania! Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% Vanyel: slay finally came out of the closet? marcie: ahahah marcie: we wish Vanyel: no Vanyel: we dont. marcie: hahhahahahaha Vanyel: the last thing I need Vanyel: is slay hitting on me Vanyel: and meaning it marcie: i don't need it either marcie: so i'd rather him be gay ;) Vanyel: I hate you, you black hearted lesbian marcie: aw, i hate you too, you bitter het boy -- Vanyel and marcie bonding Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 December 2002 %% Manuka: The Physics Division at Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory (LBNL) has a position for an experienced Particle Physicist. The position involves working half-time with the Particle Data Grou Manuka: p Manuka: "I never wanted to be a sysadmin... i wanted to be... A PARTICLE PHYSICIST! leaping from cyclotron to cyclotron in the wilds of Berkeley! and Sing! SING! Vanyel: ahahah marcie: ahahah -- Manuka singing his little heart out Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 December 2002 %% ed: how goes the alcholism today leo? Vanyel: its not ed: remember ed: it takes more than a couple of days to unleash the alcholic in all of us. ed: you must try harder Vanyel: it took me all day yesterday to recover from my last binge Moni: heh marcie: psh marcie: PUSSY ed: ytes ed: I believe marcie has spake the truth ed: You are a Pussy Jake: you should be doing keg stands by next friday Jake: this is training damnit Jake: wtf else are you gonna do when yer homeless? ed: you're not good enough until you get the shakes during your first week on the new job -- ed whipping Vanyel into shape Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2002 %% Vanyel: "...but amber! i DO respect your mind! I'd just respect it even more if it would bounce gently when you walk." saundo: ahahahahah saundo: i had a cow-orker like that saundo: she wanted to be taken seriously as an SA saundo: but she really did best just standing there and bouncing gently Vanyel: thats fine Vanyel: most of my coworkers at AOL were like that Vanyel: male AND female saundo: ahahahah -- Vanyel and saundo on cow-orkers Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2002 %% saundo: you'll need a wirebrush and scotch, marcie, to fix your sinuses DontKnow: though my pints are long island iced teas tonight. marcie: owwww. marcie: damn you, saundo saundo: you drink the scotch first, then take the wirebrush and throw it out the window saundo: either way, you don't care about your sinuses saundo: it's a home remedy -- saundo giving marcie advice on sinus trouble Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2002 %% marcie: i love you, zaundo saundo: you do nawt saundo: you merely lust after the insanity in my head marcie: but i dew! marcie: well marcie: yes saundo: i know j00! marcie: that's more or less the same thing. -- marzie and zaundo share the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2002 %% saundo: lesbian midget sex - where smaller IS better -- saundo with an idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2002 %% see also http://www.eaglesnestbbs.org/reverse-enquotes.txt %% marcie: happy new year you weirdos Cyrano: weird is as weird does. marcie: yes :) Cyrano: I'm living under a curse saundo: happy new year, queen weirdo marcie: aw, you remembered, zaundo marcie: *snif* saundo: yes saundo: you are queen weirdo. ALl hail queen weirdo, and her squad of attack midgets poised to rend all hell on exposed kneecaps marcie: that's damn right. -- hail to the queen, baby Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 January 2003 %% Cyrano: I want a tacnuke for next xmas -- Cyrano making out his wishlist Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 January 2003 %% ed: helol ym naem si loe -- ed demonstrating Vanyel-itis Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2003 %% Cyrano: riot charges Cyrano: breacher rounds Cyrano: teflon jacketed armor piercing midgets cuinhell: YES! cuinhell: Mobile Midget Launching System ed: depleted uranium midgets marcie: ahahah ed: or enriched Cyrano: dumdum midgets. ed: whatever your plans are, we have a midget to suite Cyrano: yeah cuinhell: cluster midgets Cyrano: they can have a WW-I style kaiser helmet, with spike cuinhell: HAHHAHAHHA ed: You want a midget with a 16" gold-leaf covered cock with a picture of margaret thatcher on the end, we can do it. Cyrano: OW. cuinhell: Edward Midgethands ed: you want a midget with an ass like the pit on tatooine that Luke skywalker was about to be thrown into, we got it. -- ed setting up his own business Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2003 %% *** sunbeam has entered room 'Main' Cyrano: geez sunbeam: hi guys Cyrano: talk about flamethrowing nazi puppets and who turns up -- Cyrano summoning sunbeam Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2003 %% china: Um, I have a Hello Kitty vibrator china: The Hello Kitty on top comes unglued after a certain amount of use. ;D -- during a discussion on weird sex toys Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2003 %% Vanyel: something about Tom and Jerry is a great euphamism for job searching in todays economy -- Vanyel on job hunting Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 January 2003 %% Cyrano: HS wouldn't have been bearable without Anne Patterson and her "God I Wish These Were Brains" t-shirt -- Cyrano reminiscing about high school Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 January 2003 %% Cyrano: futz, I forgot an important rule Cyrano: first make cables, THEN have the beer -- Cyrano forgetting the rules Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2003 %% Cyrano: hm Cyrano: this is the first time I've seen the phrase "pompous donkey rimmer" used in a webcomic Vanyel: url? Cyrano: http://www.nuklearpower.com/ Cyrano: normally I hate this style of comic Cyrano: but the guy really does humor well marcie: i'd think that would be the first time you've seen the phrase "pompous donkey rimmer" used ANYWHERE, in fact Cyrano: you may be right -- Cyrano looking at online comics Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2003 %% Cyrano: enabling javascript in netscape is like popping the clutch at idle Vanyel: ahhahaahah Cyrano: there's this giant "ha-HUH" Cyrano: and then it stalls Vanyel: rofl -- Cyrano reviewing Netscape Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2003 %% Cyrano: there's something wrong about hearing a Chopin nocturne whilest a woman is moaning about her empty ass -- Cyrano on porn music Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2003 %% Cyrano: fluid flow physics is a bitch cuinhell: that's why it is important to use a jizz sock -- cuinhell on physics Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 January 2003 %% Cyrano: know what keeps ocean mammals in packs, despite the fact that they don't directly share? Lia: protection Vanyel: coca cola 6 pack rings? Cyrano: the van der whales force. -- mwah mwah mwah mwahhhhh Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 January 2003 %% Vanyel: I AM BRAINSUCKY! -- Vanyel finding himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 January 2003 %% Slayer: fuck if i'm moving back to mississippi K: i'm in tennesshitty K: not mississhitty Slayer: same thing just more hilly in places -- Slayer on the unique aspects of the South Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2003 %% K: i wouldn't know what the song greensleeves was if it weren't for fisher price -- K paying tribute to his influences Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2003 %% K: i've dated 3 chicks with kids now and i still haven't ever had to change a diaper in my life K: i take pride in that -- K being a good boyfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2003 %% Cyrano: sure, sell yourself out Cyrano: but set your sights high Cyrano: I mean, if Rael can get 50000 people following his every word and he doesn't even make sense Cyrano: think of what a real religion engineered for the masses could do Vanyel: dude. Vanyel: thats it Vanyel: vaginism! Cyrano: AHAHAHAHAH marcie: HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH Vanyel: you worship god by having random sex marcie: i'm your first disciple! marcie: sign me UP! -- marcie converting Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2003 %% DontKnow: yeah, worshippers have advantages. but getting those worshippers either require luck or else the right personality. DontKnow: and I sure don't have the personality to get one friend, let a lone a few thousand. marcie hears the faint music of the world's tiniest violin DontKnow: tha'ts too much music for me. Vanyel: that was me farting -- Vanyel making music of the night Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2003 %% Cyrano: hm, religion Cyrano: how about this Cyrano: we start one where the focal point is that we have proof that this universe is actually a simulation Al: cult of the exploding cow? Cyrano: and our divine mission in to contact the bored person running it Cyrano: in=is marcie: bored MIT geek from another universe Cyrano: more or less -- Cyrano founding a religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2003 %% Jake: man Jake: I sure do think the world should clone gary coleman -- Jake with a horrifying idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2003 %% Vanyel: anal bleeding Cyrano: and there was much rejoicing. -- Cyrano being quoted out of context Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2003 %% cuinhell: http://www.somethingawful.com/goldmine/01-14-2003/Clown_Lotion_2.gif Cyrano: I'm not going anywhere near a url with the words "clown lotion" in it. cuinhell: wuss. cuinhell: it involves midgets you heretic Cyrano: oh Cyrano: well that's ok then -- Cyrano being appeased Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2003 %% Vanyel: mustang sally Vanyel: better slow yourmustang down Cyrano: too late, ford already did. -- Cyrano on cars Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2003 %% Cyrano: turnips. if we could just get people to worship turnips... -- Cyrano trying to start a religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2003 %% Vanyel: AOL IS A BUNCH OF FESTERING DOG SNOT FUCKERS -- Vanyel is enlightened Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2003 %% Cyrano: going insane might be worth it, just for the vacation -- Cyrano needing a break Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2003 %% saundo: ass filtered corn niblets! marcie: YEAH! saundo: filtered by the finest rrrrrrectums known to man saundo: farm fresh from our asses to youuuuuuu! saundo ahems saundo: i apologize saundo: I've had very little sleep marcie: do carry on -- saundo's head spinning around Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2003 %% Slayer: i'm prejudiced against white rappers Slayer: it'd be the same if some bruthas got up there and started line dancing Slayer: you can take my heart squicky squicky my ache breaky heart kill whitey Slayer: not that i like country or "herban" music, but it's just funny when they overlap the colors Vanyel: well Vanyel: eminem is pretty talented, as far as rappers go Slayer: my mom went down to the country club i shot a cop and smeared the blood. werd. -- Slayer on Eminem Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2003 %% Cyrano: ok Cyrano: Unix translations of music lines Vanyel: oh no marcie: here we go marcie getes the popcorn Cyrano: sigaction(TRAP_TRACE, SIG_KILL, &tempsig); Cyrano: ("I'd rather die than give you control") Vanyel: ahahAHAHAHAHAHAH marcie: hahahahah! Cyrano: it's a damn good thing I'm loaded Cyrano: mpi_realloc(getpgrp(), MPI_LIMIT_ANY, MPI_SCHED_IMMED); Cyrano: ("We gotta go now") Vanyel: ahahahaha -- Cyrano being creative Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2003 %% marcie: A GREAT BIG SQUASH JUST SAT UPON MY HAT! marcie: A GREAT BIG SQUASH JUST SQUISHED MY HAT SO FLAT! Vanyel: uhh Vanyel: joy? firl: she's lost it. marcie: yes. marcie: i have. marcie: actually i'm watching a veggie tales DVD marcie: which is a SURE indication i've lost it. -- marcie going mad (again) Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2003 %% *** cuinhell has entered room 'Main' ed: cuinmyscrotum juice cuinhell: ed bagely ed: hahah *** Cyrano has been disconnected *** Cyrano has entered room 'Main' ed: james baby ed: my little ball of jizz marcafk snorks *** marcafk is now known as marcie ed: motherfucker -- the boys being affectionate Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2003 %% Vanyel: lets get thrown out of mexico Cyrano: cool! -- the new EN plan Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2003 %% Cyrano: ed on speed Cyrano: the writings could be pulitzer material -- Cyrano on ed and drugs Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 January 2003 %% Vanyel: its 2700 miles to santa cruz. We've got a full tank of gas, 60gb of mp3's. It's dark and we're wearing night vision goggles. Hit it. -- The EN Brothers Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 January 2003 %% Al: he's just hosed his copy of XP Al: can't figure out how to run their restore disc Al: and is asking me for help marcie: heh marcie: fuck 'im Al: yep Jake: is he a spoonfed yuppie? Al: he's 18 marcie: "lemme ask you something. when you came drivin' up here, did you see a sign on the front of my house that said 'dead pentium storage'?" Al: he neither is nor isn't marcie: "well, now..." Al: because he hasn't gotten to that point yet Vanyel: ahahAHAHAHAHAHaaAahHAHAHAHAHA Al: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA marcie: "DID you see a SIGN that said dead PENTIUM STORAGE?!?" marcie: "no. i didn't." marcie: "no. you know WHY? causing storing dead PENTIUMS ain't my FUCKIN BUSINESS, THAT'S WHY!" marcie bows -- marcie getting medieval Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 January 2003 %% K: and the people! K: and the people! sybil: what the hell are you talking about? marcie: only his hairdresser knows for sure -- K being dramatic Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 January 2003 %% Moni: -21 wc in Minnesota Moni: gawd Moni: oh..lovely -16 in St. Louis Moni: my decision to move there or not, is getting easier every day ed: its a balmy 98.6 under my ballsack, though. Moni: thanks ed Sarge: ahh the tropics of ED -- ed with the weather report Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 January 2003 %% ed: mahahaha ed: personal papsmear machine Moni: the things I walk in on -- Moni, worried Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2003 %% saundo: argh - the midgets are coming - the midgets are coming - get the wvery small kleenexes! -- saundo going mad Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2003 %% Lia: I must have been in a bad mood last week Lia: I washed an entire load of black clothes -- Lia and laundry Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2003 %% Cyrano: if you end up waking up in an alleyway every morning reeking of tequila, maybe it's time to change MTAs. -- Cyrano with advice on Exchange Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 January 2003 %% Cyrano: may you be blessed by a kid who, when he's 6, does not attempt to set the house on fire. -- Cyrano with a blessing Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 January 2003 %% Cyrano: great Cyrano: he got sent to the principals office twice today Moni: Why twocie? Cyrano: he disassembled his desk. Moni: bwahahahaha Vanyel: ahahaha Sarge: yep, he's james' son alright Cyrano: sigh -- Cyrano on his son Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 January 2003 %% firl: ok, when someone is talking about "Roentgenology" are they talking about X-Rays? Cyrano: either that or studies of dead german scientists. Cyrano: or was he swedish, I can never remember firl: well, when did the term Xray become en vogue then? Cyrano: when everyone got tired of saying "Roentgen Rays" -- Cyrano the scientist Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 January 2003 %% Lia: how about "metric shitload" Cyrano: hm Cyrano: well, what's the density of shit Lia: depends on where it floats DontKnow: depends. runny or solid? green brown or black? Cyrano: figuring 4'x8'x3' = 96 ft^2 Lia: cubic feet Lia: hmmmm Lia: I probably have that many books Cyrano: ok, water is 1.945 slugs per cubic foot Vanyel: rofl marcie: weirdos Lia: and your point is? Vanyel: BITCH! Cyrano: 187 slugs Cyrano: that's a metric shitload. Lia: cool Vanyel: how many hogsheads is that Lia: *ROFL* Cyrano: don't make me beat you up. Vanyel: come on, you dont have a conversion table handy? *** Crazy has entered room 'Main' Cyrano: har DontKnow: once upon a time I wrote a "/conv" routine for ebbs chat. Vanyel: i remember it Cyrano: racking brains Lia: conversion factor for shitload to hogshead is Cyrano: hogshead is 7 firkins Al: Lia: conversion factor for shitload to hogshead is Cyrano: or 63 imperial gallons Lia: 44.35 hogsheads per shitload Al falls out Lia: er, 4.35 Cyrano: what the fuck is a firkin Vanyel: a firkin is 1.323452345 statute shitloads Lia: halk a fuckin? Cyrano: no DontKnow: a firkin is 63 imperial gallons. seems like a large keg. Lia: half Cyrano: 1 firkin = 9 imperial gallons. Vanyel: as opposed to a metric shitload Cyrano: nono Cyrano: nautical shitloads. Vanyel: rofl marcie: nautical shitloads! Lia: so a firkin would be about 1/5 of a hogshead DontKnow: a firkin is about 1/4 of a barrel (british units) Vanyel: how many assfulls is that Lia: oh Cyrano: depends on the ass. Vanyel: how many shitloads per assful? Lia: well a hogshead is a barrel Lia: so I was close Lia: 1 per day, if you're lucky Lia: anyway Cyrano: fascinating -- goddamn nerds calculating a metric shitload Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 January 2003 %% ed: you hairy jew bastard Vanyel: just call me moishe gorilla -- Vanyel accepting himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 January 2003 %% Vanyel: weiurdos marcie: yes marcie: turdos saundo: zofo Courtney: i have a cookie dough blizzard for dessert Courtney: yum Vanyel: you suck. saundo: tostiturdos saundo: with new brown flavor marcie: mmm! marcie: brown sauce! Al: peanut butter and corn chip sandwich marcie cracks up at herself saundo: have them with corn! Courtney: new lays chips, now in anal secretion flavour (may include olestra) saundo: niblets, ass filtered, fresh from our mexican suppliers Al: eeew saundo: with fresh anal leakage dip marcie: mmmm, ass filtered corn niblets! ed: wha ed: anal leakage marcie: HI ED saundo: that caught his attention ed: fuckin olestra ed: that shit is naaaastay saundo: you can take the anal leakage out of the boy saundo: the man just wipes -- turd talk on EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 January 2003 %% Cyrano: when phenethylamines are outlawed, only outlaws will have chocolate. -- Cyrano with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 January 2003 %% Vanyel: bad sign #1: our marketing manager doesnt understand oow our product works -- Vanyel on his new job Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 January 2003 %% Vanyel: there seem to be a lot less lusers on this commute saundo: there'll be more eventually Vanyel: i hadda share the last commute with stanford college students as well as sun employees saundo: ew saundo: dumb and dumber -- saundo commenting on the commute Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 January 2003 %% Vanyel: doesnt linux support fat32? marcie: damned if i know marcie: it should marcie: but that doesn't mean anything ;) Cyrano: it wasn't politically acceptable enough Cyrano: you need to use "mount -F bbw32" marcie: *snork* marcie: i love you james :) Cyrano: fssnap /dev/bra -- Big Beautiful Woman ^W File System Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2003 %% Cyrano: I'd like to spend a day as a rock. Cyrano: I think it would be cathartic -- Cyrano's secret wish Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2003 %% K: ramrod K: the official police car of EN Cyrano: the Hyundai Errata. Vanyel: ahahahahah Cyrano: and its cheaper clone, the Daewoo Afterthought ... Cyrano: the Fiat Pinata? ... Cyrano: the dodge cutlet. K hops in the Oldsmobile Backbacon -- Cyrano with car recommendations Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2003 %% ed: never, ever, start out a mail that'll end up seeing my eyes lik this: ed: First of all - I'm not an "idiot" when it comes to these sorts of ed: things. I feel my knowledge of computers, networking, and etc. ed: rivals/surpasses those employed at places like yourself. ed: never ed: *ever* do that. ed: if you dont' want to see 99% packetloss and *unimaginable* ammounts ed: an anonoymous tip to the fucking FBI terrorist hotline ed: and a gangrape of your dog, by my midgets. ed: and my tech ed: god bles shim ed: Now, Martin, we are bending over backwards to help you, but your attitude ed: always stinks and that's not a behavior I like to reward. Vanyel hands ed a dollar and claps marcie: you have taught your tech well, my son. KesEat: bad luser, no bandwidth -- ed on another customer rant Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2003 %% Vanyel: i'm at the point where i'd stick my dfingers in the A/C scoket ot get rid of all thsi body hair -- Van needing industrial-strength electrolysis Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2003 %% Slayer: hold on while i type up some logs to prove that marcie is bin laden Courtney: pahaha Courtney: osama bin lesbian firl: i *knew* there was somethign suspicious about her Vanyel: AHAHAHAH marcie jabbers in Arabic Vanyel: *** Marcie (Osama bin Lesbian marcie: ALL HAIL ALLAH marcie: DEFEAT THE GREAT SATAN Vanyel: and chew some rug marcie: THE STREETS WILL RUN RED WITH THE BLOOD OF THE INFIDELS Courtney: ALL HAIL ALLEHSBIAN marcie: and the PMS'ing women firl: yeah -- marcie finding religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2003 %% Cyrano: join me in my search for spiritual meaning through the use of over the counter cold meds. -- Cyrano seeking enlightenment Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2003 %% Cyrano: I have a bottle of robitussin on my desk, with a bendy-straw sticking out Cyrano: user walks in, looks at desk, says "uh, maybe later" and walks out -- jamez scaring the lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2003 %% Cyrano: if you could clone anyone you wanted, in sick twisted fashion, whose DNA would you nab? afked: ASS Xi: Janet Reno Cyrano: janet reno. RenoED: janet reno does dallas marcie: ew. Cyrano: couldn't we just try to cross reno with dworkin to see if we could build the Six Million Dollar Bitch? Jake: everytime I here janet reno I picture her dancing on SNL Jake: its quite scary RenoED: you mean every time you fantasize RenoED: you want that reno snatch Jake Jake: YES RenoED: you wanna check under the hood for the malformed clitoris that *actually is* a penis. Jake: SO MANY WRINKLES TO CHOOSE FROM -- her name is Reno and she dances on the sand Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2003 %% Cyrano: hello kitty should be used as an instrument of good, not evil. -- Cyrano with morality lessons Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2003 %% Vanyel: if I shaved off all my body hair right now, i'd be able to make a toupee for a litter of bald cats -- Moishe the Gorilla Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2003 %% Cyrano: a note Cyrano: cautionary tales do not end with the statement "it was sooooo cool" -- Cyrano with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 February 2003 %% Crazy: part of the mystery of physics is learning the definition of k Al: no Crazy Crazy: until you learn it, you have to keep taking courses Al: part of the mystery of EN is learning the definition of K -- Al on physics Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 February 2003 %% Sarge: my son is Sean Donovan Vanyel: god that name is so irish wob: heh Vanyel: he'll be pissing shamrocks Sarge: hahaha -- aye laddy! Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2003 %% Vanyel: there is a deer taking a shit in front of my office window -- Vanyel becoming one with nature Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2003 %% Sarge: anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die has to be evil Kestrel punches sarge in the nose Kestrel: bleed away you pussy -- Sarge on women and Kestrel being impatient Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2003 %% Cyrano: it's so hard to find good test subjects these days -- Cyrano lamenting his lot Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 February 2003 %% *** Lia has entered room 'Main' Lia: Oh the weather outside is frightful Lia: and a fire would be so delightful Lia: but since I have places to go Lia: FUCK THIS SNOW, fuck this snow, fuck this snow Vanyel: ahahah Lia bows Lia: bye *** Lia has left the room -- Lia loving winter Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 February 2003 %% Cyrano: java is slow. film at 11. -- Cyrano with the news Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% Cyrano: killer tomatoes attack france. -- Cyrano with more news Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% Cyrano: I'd be a control freak if I had the energy -- Cyrano, tired Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% Moni: heh..there's a Cop Convention next door to my office at the Marriot. More cops in one place since the Oakland Riots. Moni: A car alarm goes off across the street. Moni: They all stand and stare at it, then go inside the building marcie: ahahahahahahahAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHA -- Moni explains it all Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% firl: whats gas like by you leo? Xi: stinky -- firl asking for the price of gasoline Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% Zorro: lia Zorro: if i donate my body, do you promise not to violate me?:P Lia: *ROFLMAO* Lia: define "violate" Zorro: i'd rather not, now Zorro: :) Lia: I just cut people's bones up into little pieces and grind them to powder Zorro: ok Zorro: that's fine Zorro: don't snort me ok -- Zorro's last will & testament Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% Cyrano: boobies uber alles. -- Cyrano's manifesto Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% DontKnow: you know, with 2630 religions in the usa and canada, we should be able to find something interesting. -- DK complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2003 %% Cyrano: ever had one of those dreams where a dozen naked women are all standing around you, and squirting you with little bottles of mustard? cuinhell: no, how do I make them happen? Cyrano: eat a hotdog with nothing but sauerkraut and jalapenos right before bed -- Cyrano with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 February 2003 %% DontKnow: fee fie foe fum. I smell and englishman. and even stronger I smell zorro. DontKnow: and i'm hungry DontKnow: and englishmen have leanred how to use their legs. Zorro: when did you start smoking crack, dude? -- Zorro concerned about DK Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 February 2003 %% Vanyel: BITCH marcie: WHORE marcie: i've been here marcie: you bald jew Vanyel: shaddap you earthen retaining wall marcie: ahahahahahhahahaaha -- Vanyel and marcie calling each other names Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 February 2003 %% Seeker: you suck Al: only if you've showered -- Al outlining his standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 February 2003 %% Jake: kesticle Jake: hows old age and treachery? Kestrel: fucked Kestrel: how's youth and stupidity? Jake: couldn't tell you, I smoke too much pot -- Jake the whippersnapper Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2003 %% Vanyel: I Vanyel: ...HAVE Vanyel: ......A BONER! -- Vanyel with an announcement Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2003 %% DontKnow: I was a deprived child growing up. -- DK reveals all Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2003 %% Xi: looooooooove by the cellphoooooone liiiiiiiiights -- Xi crooning a ballad Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2003 %% Vanyel: drinkdrinkdrinkdrinkdrinkgoddamnineedtogetlaiddrinkdrinkdrinkdrink -- Vanyel with a mantra Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2003 %% cuinhell: the power of ass compels you Vanyel farts cuinhell: the POWER of ass compels you cuinhell: the POWER OF ASS compels you Vanyel: the power of gASS compels you marcie: ain't that the truth -- be HEEEEEEEALED!!! Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 February 2003 %% marcie: aw man marcie: i have a turd crowning marcie: brb in like 2 minutes cuinhell: HAHHAAHA marcie: don't go anywhere rayray: that's gross rayray: thankyou cuinhell: her shit window is much more important cuinhell: ;) rayray: tmi Vanyel: too much shitformation rayray: yup cuinhell: quality pooping waits for no one Vanyel: she kbnows this, she changes diapers cuinhell: yours? Vanyel: only on special occasions marcie: har har motherfuckers marcie: it was an express poop marcie: don't worry rayray: thanks cuinhell: PLOP -- marcie's shit window Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 February 2003 %% Cyrano: Vanyel: I Cyrano: Vanyel: ...HAVE Cyrano: Vanyel: ......A BONER! Cyrano: -- Vanyel with an announcement linzee: i cant wait to try out -- linzee, eager Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 February 2003 %% *** dweez has entered room 'Main' dweez: lear dweez: jet dweez: is dweez: in dweez: my ass -- dweez pleading for help Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2003 %% marcie: you can never go wrong with liquid latex marcie nods knowingly -- marcie on anniversary presents Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2003 %% Moni: I'd marry leo if he wore leather pants Kestrel: love that -- Kestrel on leo's leather pants, we think Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2003 %% Cyrano: parenthood teaches you to not fear death. Cyrano: you know that part of sleeping beauty where she "fell into a deep cold sleep that lasted a hundred years"? Cyrano: that's the GOOD part of the story now. -- Cyrano on his beloved progeny Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2003 %% marcie: From: luseradmin marcie: Subject: Internet Service marcie: The internet seems to be back up. marcie: thanks, marcie: luseradmin marcie: ..... marcie: i... just... marcie: never mind. Zorro: jhaha marcie: just... never mind. Xi: reply to all ed: hly shit marcie: i won't even start. Kestrel: SNORK ed: no marcie: best part ed: that guy mailed the admin list ed: oh ed: oh god ed: oh ed: oh god marcie: he's the network guy. ed: who is fuckin luser ed: who is this fuck Xi: ed's gonna pop Moni chuckles ed: does he like pr0n spam Xi: he does now Zorro: rofl -- ed getting twitchy over stupidity Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2003 %% Vanyel: i wonder how long auggie was down for marcie: who cares Al: did you need to unplug it so there'd be space for the cappucino maker? marcie: hahahahahahahaha marcie: our concern for auggie's fate overwhelms me Al: gotta have your priorities straight ya know marcie: damn skippy [2 hours later...] Cyrano: flob Cyrano: auggie was down? Cyrano: did leo need a doorstop or something? -- everyone loves Auggie! Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2003 %% Zorro: god i wnna spell one day -- Zorro with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% Jake: canadiens are stupid Courtney: hahaha Courtney: americans are even moreso Courtney: :) Jake: yeah but Jake: we kill a whole lot faster -- Jake the patriot Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% Zorro: one day im gonna know what you guys are blabbing about Zorro: i'll probably be in the corner, watching in spirit form Zorro: but i'l get it -- Zorro trying to catch up Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% marcie: Folder "sparm" in doesn't exist. Create? marcie: argh. marcie: i have vanyelitis. Xi: SPARM! Vanyel: ahahahaha Xi: uh oh Xi: its spreading -- it came from Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% Xi: hmmm Xi: i am undecided on oceans 11 Xi: it seems amusing Xi: yet, somehow, I really really want to see clooney get hit by a truck Xi: someone needs to remake this as a porn flick marcie: heheh Xi: oceans 11 inches marcie: ocean's 11 inches marcie: HAHAHAHAHAH Xi: whoa Vanyel: oh jesus Vanyel: thats scary marcie: we scare me Xi: yes -- EN goes to the movies Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% Xi: come on green elixir of Q-ness. PUT ME DOWN *** saundo has been disconnected marcie: wrong user Xi: damnit marcie: now look what you did. Xi: watch out Xi: misdirected Q of Power maybe be coming for ... YOU! *** Courtney is now known as cqafk marcie: see? -- Xi warns of his secret powers Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% Vanyel: goddamn Vanyel: when I yawn Vanyel: I look like a screeching owl marcie: *spurt* marcie: goddamn you leo marcie: that's the second time i've spit beer on my monitor Al: hahaha saundo: how do you know? don't you scrunch your eyes shut when you yawn? Vanyel: oh Vanyel: for a second i though tyou came saundo: ahahahah Al: hahahah marcie: ahahahah saundo: raging bull, to marcie's panties, RAGING BULL to Marcie's panties! marcie: ginchGinchGINCH -- marcie having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% Vanyel: oh my god saundo: ?? Vanyel: the water coming out of the faucet Vanyel: is BROWN saundo: mmmmm marcie: ugh. saundo: crunchy marcie: time to move out of cali. saundo: like water isn't supposed to be saundo: bottle it and call it "Leo's Wicked Brown ALe" marcie: ahahahaha Vanyel: nah Vanyel: i'd just shit into a bottle then saundo: no saundo: that's the stout Vanyel: nothing liek starting a bath marcie: no, that's the stout Vanyel: and seeing a brown tub marcie: ahhhaha saundo: AHAHHAHAHAHA marcie: goddamn, lag sucks saundo: Vanyel: i'd just shit into a bottle then marcie: otherwise i would have been first! saundo: saundo: that's the stout saundo: marcie: no, that's the stout Al: "no, that's the stout" Al falls OUT saundo: ahahaha marcie: :D Vanyel: goddamnit marcie: rock and roll. saundo: You're drinking, it just seems like there's lag marcie: oh YEAH -- Leo's homebrew Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2003 %% Xi: just watch what you put in her tea. she's known to wield atlatls Zorro: nod DontKnow: she's getting better at them too Vanyel: can she actually hit things? DontKnow: depends on how big the thing is. and how fast it moves. Lia: yes DontKnow: but yes she can hit things. Zorro: hmm Vanyel: could you hit a gnats balls at 20 yards? DontKnow hides his scars. -- DK being careful Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2003 %% Al: DRILLDO! marcafk: weirdo. Zorro: uh oh -- beat poetry on EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2003 %% marcie: here's where i insult saundo. marcie points at saundo and says, "gordon elliott!" marcie runs saundo tackles marcie saundo: ok saundo: and now I drown you inside the "it's a small world" ride at disney world marcie: NO marcie: ANYTHING BUT THAT saundo: so your last choking view is of the satanic children laughing at you Zorro: damn Al: it's a world of laughter a world of tears Xi: ITS A SMALL WORLD AFTER *COUGHGLUBGLUBLGLUB* Al: a world of hopes and a world of fears saundo: never let it be said that I am not cruel and unusual marcie: it figures al would know the damn words Al: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- marcie being tortured Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2003 %% Cyrano: and they tried to incinerate my bags meg: james cuinhell: JAMES marcie: doh! Cyrano: failed the damn explosives swab test meg: smaje cuinhell: hahahah james marcie: ahahaha ed: hahahahahaha Vanyel: AHAHAHAHAH Vanyel: oh shit! marcie: only you, man, only you meg: AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Vanyel: i didnt hear this! Cyrano: and no, I have absolutely no idea meg: HAHAHAHAHA JKAMES cuinhell: liar ;P Cyrano: and then Cyrano: AND THEN Vanyel: so besides getting your baggage almost exploded Cyrano: I get to the gate Vanyel: oh there's more! Cyrano: with about 4 minutes to takeoff marcie: oh man marcie: there's more? Cyrano: and Cyrano: surprise, surprise Cyrano: another "random" check marcie: ahahaha cuinhell: man, you got the unabomber look or something? Vanyel: you WERENT carryuing any explosives, were you? Cyrano: hell no Vanyel: wow Cyrano: I haven't even _played_ with explosives since the 4th of july last year -- Cyrano getting through airport security Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2003 %% cuinhell: we should develop and sell clear shoes cuinhell: we'd make a killing cuinhell: molded from clear gel marcie: and socks to go along with them cuinhell: yes marcie: with designs on them cuinhell: HAHA marcie: little american flags on the toes marcie: "see, i'm not a terrorist! please let me through, mr security man!" ed: shit cuinhell: i'm thinking the corporate logo would be a little bomb inside a red circle with a slash through it ed: with a little middle finger pointing up marcie: "I DUBYA" ed: I asscroft ed: or marcie: a little towel with a circle-slash cuinhell: yes ed: a little circle with a towelhead on it with a circle through the towel marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA ed: hahahahahah cuinhell: scary ed: great minds ed: sick minds marcie: and ours too -- the crew with a marketable idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2003 %% Kestrel: engineering is where it's at baby Courtney: hahaha Courtney: most of my friends are engineers Courtney: my dad is an engineer Kestrel: I'm sorry Courtney: hehe Courtney: they are bigger nerds thjan me Kestrel: you DO know the advantages though... Courtney: what's that? Kestrel: they are perfectionists, always striving to improve the performance of any given thing marcafk: IT GETS YOU HOT CHICKS Kestrel: they study cause and effect *** marcafk is now known as marcie Kestrel: they apply the lessons learned toimprove the process and product Courtney: hahaha Courtney: I see where this is going Kestrel: now, imagine that applied to sex marcie: yaeh marcie: like i said. -- Kestrel counseling Court on career choices Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2003 %% Xi: like all our NT|UNIX admins, they don't see the big picture Xi: the can't logically follow a connection from their ass to a toilet seat -- Xi complaining about work Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2003 %% ed: dilbert has to be watered down to be believable. -- ed on corporate America Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2003 %% Zorro: i need a new wheelchair Zorro: one that goes 80mph Zorro: and has those gripping rail thingies like tanks have Zorro: and some .50 guns Zorro: and strippers Zorro: and a mp3 player and full stereo Zorro: hmm Zorro: oh and i want it to elivate upto like 20 floores -- Zorro with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2003 %% Zorro: keep a knife on hand. you can wittle when nervous or murder people -- Zorro with tips on quitting smoking Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2003 %% Slayer: 5 bucks a a blowjob to whomever can find the lyrics to "call me alice" by rasputina first Vanyel: awesome -- Vanyel getting excited Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 March 2003 %% Megs: leo, what's wrong? Vanyel: i'm an exchange administrator. Vanyel: thats bad enough Vanyel: but whats worse: firl: (and that's his first mistake) Vanyel: I'm REALLY GOOD at it. Vanyel: its like admitting you were seen on market street with a 75 year old hooker with a crack habit and 4 kids ed: hmmm. ed: seenwith-caught 6 inches into.. ed: with one of her kids giving you a rimjob Vanyel: basically Vanyel: outlook web access is the rimjob cuinhell: yes it is Megs: blah Xi: RIMJOB Megs: hey xi ed: what is it when the 2nd kid (a male) is also tonguing your bag while shoving his finger up his moms ass? Vanyel: thats owa on an unprotected net -- Vanyel, full of shame Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 March 2003 %% Vanyel: my nuts are moldy -- Vanyel with personal problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 March 2003 %% Cerberus: "If I don't know who you are, you have a better chance of fucking Claudia Schiffer than of me picking up this phone. Go away." *BEEP* Cerberus: ^^ answering machine message from heaven. -- Cerb with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 March 2003 %% saundo: marzie marcie: zaundo saundo coats marcie in chocolate saundo: i'm back to making my marcie graven idols marcie: WOO marcie: you big tease saundo: I know saundo: i'm such a tease saundo: however marcie: yes marcie: yes you are saundo: i can at least have a little piece of marcie to melt in my navel *** zag has entered room 'Main' saundo: and make a little navel plug marcie: that's so sweet. saundo: to sell to the masses as a little piece o' holy marcie Xi: can we make a shrine from her pieces saundo: i could put it into plastic to hand around the neck marcie: yes marcie: you can sell marcie indulgences saundo: or grind it up to put on top of the holy whipped cream and banana nut sundae saundo: yes saundo: marcie indulgences marcie: "for the right price, she'll indulge you AND your girlfriend" ZDailySh: whoa ZDailySh: what marcie? ZDailySh: heh marcie: this marcie saundo: for the bargain price of $100/hr, she'll indulge you and a female friend marcie: <-- ZDailySh: that got my attention marcie: *sprroooiiiing* saundo: twice the hey-hey and all the chocolate marcie: damn skippy saundo: and we won't even mention the entire lack of nuts saundo: for want of a better term marcie: but that goes without saying, really saundo: but i said it saundo: oh i give up marcie: yes marcie: you certainly did marcie: aw nuts! marcie slaps her knee marcie: i am so clever saundo punts marcie saundo: bad pun hour was 3 hours ago marcie: aww, you really DO love me saundo: when lia came and went marcie: and my beer too saundo: I do saundo: as many times a night as I can saundo: oooh saundo: beer marcie: woop marcie: yes, zaundo marcie: beer saundo: mmmmm saundo: beer marcie passes saundo a Laughing Lab zag: mmm saundo: pour it down my pants zag: beer saundo: I'll pretend to be an elephant marcie pours it all over zag marcie: oops marcie: missed saundo: ahahahah zag: oh no saundo: and you pretend to be a beer flinging chimp zag: now i have beer all over me Cerberus: keep yer nose away from me, elephant breath marcie: do forgive me and allow me to lick it off, zag marcie: i must keep you clean saundo: aaah ooh uggg aaah *fling fling* saundo: ahahahahah saundo: you know marcie zag: yes you must saundo: that's what I love abou tyou *** Cerberus has left the room saundo: always thinking of others marcie: what marcie: my lack of decorum? saundo: never about yourself marcie: oh yes, well, that too saundo: (that too) saundo: simply offering yourself selflessly to lick beer off women marcie: yes marcie: it's true marcie: it's a tough job saundo sniffs marcie: but someone has to do it! saundo: that's just so... dyke saundo: yes marcie: i willingly sacrifice my tongue for the cause. saundo: and that someone is you saundo: ahahahah zag: hey, i'm not complaining saundo: a noble cause at that marcie: indeed yes -- marcie the philanthropist Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 March 2003 %% Kesticle: you people have ruined me cuinhell: awesome Kesticle: guy walks up to my cube and says "the analog output channel says it's congested" and without looking up I say "metamucil"... cuinhell: HAHAHAHA Kesticle: that is a direct cu-ism... it's YOUR fault cuinhell: awesome, don't get laid off because you are channeling me at work cuinhell: ;P Kesticle: it's a real possibility Kesticle: "does not play well with others" kinda fits Kesticle: and don't EVEN get me started on the warpage marcie has caused cuinhell: yah cuinhell: marcie is the devil cuinhell: the GOOD kind of devil Kesticle: she-devil cuinhell: SCK ROSEANNE! cuinhell: er AC Kesticle: she devil daughter of sapho, here my call Kesticle: hear too Kesticle: or here Kesticle: we can party IG_afk: DC Kesticle: for tomorrow we die marcie quietly channels satan Xi: marcie has satan in her pants! marcie: you know it -- Kestrel being corrupted Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 March 2003 %% Vanyel: i think i'm gonna go home and idlly masturbate Vanyel: i'm working on my target practice Vanyel: I wanna be able to change the channel without a remote -- Vanyel with a goal Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 March 2003 %% Xi: brain not working cuinhell: hehe marcie: brain? what is brain? Vanyel: ham marcie: ah marcie: that explains everything. -- marcie the spam-head Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 March 2003 %% cuinhell locks vanyel in a room with 16 siebel consultants and one chain saw Vanyel: does the chainsaw have gas in it? cuinhell: (YOU have the chain saw) cuinhell: yes cuinhell: it's running Vanyel: ok Vanyel: tahts not much of a challenge Vanyel: one other question cuinhell: and it's big enough that bone won't cause it to seize up Vanyel: does the room i'm locked in have regular janatorial service? cuinhell: no, but it's princess's bedroom Vanyel: hrm Xi: so it has zombie ferrets? Vanyel: can i get extra gas? -- Vanyel being tested Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 March 2003 %% cuinhell: ALALALBALALALALA UNGA BOK BOK BOK DERPA -- cuinhell the inimitable Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 March 2003 %% Vanyel: FUCKING WINDOWSOQWeurioweyfasdfheiowquhklfjhsaigusdg marcie: yes marcie: aren't you glad you use mac? marcie: don't you wish everybody did? saundo: it booted by osmosis Vanyel: god Vanyel: yes. Vanyel: at least when teh mac fucks up, its pretty -- Vanyel the mac addict Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 March 2003 %% cuinhell: leo is going to isreal to learn how to be a suicide bomber IG_afk: practice makes perfect Vanyel: no, i'd go to the palestianian territory to learn to be a suicide bomber IG_afk: or you could goto iraq and be a target Vanyel: i'd rather be a suicide bomber IG_afk: well both ways you go out with a bang -- Vanyel considering career options Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 March 2003 %% Zorro: still got that duck? querk: duck? Zorro: ... didn't you get a duck a few years back? querk: OH! querk: My dog imprinted on the duck and then that duck tried to make friends with our neighbors doberman Zorro: oh marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH querk: beak and feathers was all that remained -- querk's tragic past Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 March 2003 %% Moni: mmm..I have fresh organic raspberries for breakfast Moni: amazing marcie swirls the raspberries in melted godiva chocolate and feeds them to moni while a gay cabana boy fans her with palm fronds Slayer: wow marcie: jealous? ;) Slayer: in every possible way marcie: heheh -- Slayer the jealous Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2003 %% Slayer: so my cat's buggin for some food and i look and she's got at least 1/4 bowl Slayer: and i'm like "you've GOT food. there are starving cats in china who would love to have that." Slayer: then it hit me that cats don't starve in china. they get eaten. marcie: words of wisdom, indeed. -- Slayer shares a profound insight Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2003 %% Vanyel: it scares phone salesmen when you start talking like gollum when you answer the phone -- Vanyel with a tip on vendor relations Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2003 %% marcie: ARGH marcie: explaining command-line ftp to a manager showered: hahaha showered: down not across Vanyel: aw shit Zorro: um marcie: no shit man marcie: geeesus h fuckstick marcie: talk about walking someone through at a base fucking level Zorro: hahaha marcie: "okay, go to 'start' and hit 'run'... no, that's the button on YOUR pc, not on the remote server..." Zorro: hehe Vanyel: ok, bang your head agaisnt your desk. what? you see stars? do it again. it appears your IE has crashed. marcie: ahahahahahahah Vanyel: no, teh blood against your forehead is normal. its kind of like windows' progress bar -- marcie having a bad luser day Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2003 %% Xi: I'm not sure who turned on the "fuck with me" switch today but when I find them, I'm going to tear their flesh from their body with a dull-toothed lawn mole -- Xi having a bad day Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2003 %% Vanyel: goddamnit Vanyel: being sick sucks. Vanyel: being sick at work sucks more Vanyel: beign sick at work with the vp from heck Vanyel: well Vanyel: new records are being established -- Vanyel striving for excellence Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2003 %% ed: drop a fork in it marcie: ahahah ed: claim lightning ed: turn it in on your renters insurance marcie: there ya go ed: use it to perform some ungodly sex act, take pictures of it ed: sell it on ebay ed: people will buy panties ed: why not a computer covered in feces and jizz and goathair -- ed on how to get free PC repair Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2003 %% Zorro: whenever your govermant starts rename fried potatos, be WORRIED that they are truly un prepared for real trouble -- Zorro on "freedom fries" Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2003 %% K sprinkles sand in everone's vagina marcie: van! why didn't you tell me you had a vagina marcie seduces van Vanyel: i'm not going to say different Vanyel: till you find out for yourself marcie: tease Vanyel: that really IS a vagina Vanyel: its just an extremely large clit marcie: ahahah Vanyel: and I have a pubic mound larger than most women Slayer: this is the most digusting thing i've ever read Vanyel: thanks slay marcie: ahahahahahahahah Vanyel bows Slayer: i loaded up on christina aguilera and shakira pictures before work and now you've ruined it -- Vanyel's vagina Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2003 %% Al: never look a gorilla in the eye. that's a sign of aggression to them cuinhell: expecially if you are holding a jar of vaseline and a 18" dildo -- Al with advice on primates Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 March 2003 %% Slayer: i tried to teach my mom to play magic once Slayer: didn't exactly work Slayer: at least she had fun with it. she kept saying "gin" or laying down "straights" and trying to take tricks marcie: ahahahahhahahahhahah -- Slay's mom the card shark Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% barnabas: I tried you teach your mom how to play swallow the horse-cock sandwich but she couldn't get her dentures out wob: i thought fags didnt dig on grannies Slayer: that's weird. she usually has no trouble handling soda straws. barnabas: that's because she's used to playing with you -- barnabas and Slay share the luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% firl: i am creating a list of things my co-workers don't know/haven't heard of. Slayer: ask her if she's heard of german snowballing Slayer: and if not, if she wants to learn firl: i work with boys Slayer: i'm not picky firl: fair enough firl: they're not either. Slayer: i'll be right over -- Slayer educating firl's cow-orkers Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% Xi: you know, i've said it before and i'll say it again Xi: lesbian fucking rule marcie: yes Xi: and you can take that both ways. -- Xi admiring the resident lesbians Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% Moni: penises need love too -- Moni being generous Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% taco: what's phone sex without elephants? -- taco worrying us all Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% Zorro: jesus Xi: yes my little lambfucker? -- Xi playing God Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% Vanyel: my ass is better Vanyel: just ask moni Jesus: i can't take this Jesus: i feel dirty -- Jesus ascending away from the debauchery Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% Moni: we need an EN Porn movie marcie: never mind training. marcie: oh jesus marcie: how scary would that be Zorro: OH GOD NO Xi: now that would be twisted cuinhell: good lord no, moni Zorro: please, no Moni: heh DontKnow: 90% of the EN porn movie would be guys jacking off. *Vanyel* ahahAHAHAH cuinhell: even i have a line that I won't cross cuinhell: it's pretty far down there in the dirt cuinhell: but I hav eone Zorro: nod Moni: it would be pretty Ass focused cuinhell: en scat porn cuinhell: with midgets flinging feces Xi: ARGH! marcie: MIDGETS! marcie: and guinness Xi: stop that cuinhell: careful xi marcie: and saundo directing all the midgets marcie: "okay, you with the baby oil, over here" Moni: saundo's a big guy Xi: feels like a meating at work cuinhell: i have plenty of time to rig a feces flinging midget under your desk tonight marcie: "no, no, get off my leg, you little bugger" Moni: he's have to be careful not to step on them Moni: leg humping midgets Xi: ankle humping midgets marcie: *squish* "ah, dammit! someone call SAG and get a replacement midget!" cuinhell: no Moni: midget jizz cuinhell: SSAG Xi: STUNT MIDGET Moni: slippery stuff cuinhell: not SAG ;) Moni: SAG is for older female midgets Vanyel: LICENSE ENFORCEMENT MIDGETS cuinhell: that's a MS product, leo Xi: hmmm cuinhell: don't speak it's name 3 times aloud marcie: MidgetWare Moni: MidgetAssWare Moni: MAW marcie: too freudian Moni: well...ya..I'm a fucking psychologist! cuinhell: ... marcie: oh yeah! Moni: heh cuinhell: i want that kind of therapy Xi: lubricated midget bowling on slip-n-slides marcie gives moni a long, slow massage, WITHOUT midgets Moni: mmm..fucking therapy Moni: oh yes..no massage midgets cuinhell: they could wear little corsets with handles in the back for easier throwing Moni: bwahah cu Xi: wait for it Xi: MIDGET CURLING! cuinhell: ! marcie: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA Moni: hehehehehe cuinhell: we are all going to a hell full of short demons when we die Zorro: indeed Moni: short demons with little juzzing penises and asses with anal leakage cuinhell: ,,, Moni: and Yani Zorro: the chick is on again van. on comedy central Vanyel: jizzing ponies? marcie: we are a bunch of sick fucking bastards cuinhell: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Vanyel: what the fuck? cuinhell repents marcie: i have tears from laughing so hard Vanyel: oh wait i cant read Moni: Jizzing ponies would be really messy Zorro: yuck Zorro: yuckyuckyuck cuinhell: mini jizzing poines i'd omagine cuinhell: imagine Xi: ponies fucking john tesh cuinhell: for our hell Xi: while he sings cuinhell: to hell with that Moni: drown the midgets in pony jizz cuinhell: ponies doing john tesh karaoke marcie: imagine marcie: a midget john tesh. marcie: with a little schroeder piano. cuinhell: GAHAHHAHA Xi: HEHEHEHEHEHE Moni: i'm gonna throw up marcie: but of course marcie: he'd have to release his albums cuinhell: playing the charlie brown theme Xi: ...naked marcie: .... marcie: on mini-disc! Vanyel: i hate you guys cuinhell: he'd have a little tiny blankie too marcie: NO REGULAR CDs FOR YOU! marcie: NO, MINI-TESH! cuinhell: stained with shit and blood and midget jizz Zorro: i feel so dirrty Moni: GF done with her porno now. marcie: awesome Moni: problem is, i"m laughing to hard to talk with her cuinhell: how was it? marcie: she's primed now marcie: finish her off Moni: how to explain what I"m laughing about Moni: .... cuinhell: AHHAHAA cuinhell: MUWAHAHAH Vanyel: two words marcie: "let me explain. ...no, is too much. let me sum up." cuinhell: GF's and EN just don't splice Vanyel: pnoy jizz Vanyel: pony even Moni: midgets, pony jizz, hell and ass marcie: i'm having the same problem over here exlpaining to cyn why i have tears from laughing so much Vanyel: ahahehehe Vanyel: put her on for a second marcie: i'm trying to explain the midget thing Vanyel: LICENSE ENFORCEMENT MIDGETS Vanyel: actually for cyn marcie: "tactial midgets! tossing midgets!" cuinhell: dakmmit leo marcie: "...okay, honey." cuinhell: if you say that one more time they will FIND you Vanyel: it would be fillet of frog midgets Vanyel: LICENSE Vanyel: ....ENFORCEMENT *** Xi is now known as xi-afk Vanyel: .....MIDGETS marcie: MIDGETS! cuinhell: leo is toast -- midget EN John Tesh enforcement pr0n! Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% saundo: a bottle of wine, EN and thou -- saundo being romantic Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2003 %% cuinhell: 12 days with no james cuinhell: no wonder we are cracking around the edges cuinhell: QUICK! someone set a cat on fire! cuinhell: or zorro! -- cuinhell having a hard time Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2003 %% ed: advanced notice ed: makes you want to go set fire to something, eh marcie marcie: china: the college is laying people off Vanyel: "Hey, guess what! you can go to teh bar and drink a lot for st. patty';s day! btw, don't come back. here's your severence." ed: I *know* you don't have the balls. marcie: ed: for some reason, that sounds likea good idea marcie: know marcie: erm marcie: god marcie: no. ed: you just have the squishy man meat substitute marcie: ahahaha marcie: i want no balls marcie: nothing that vulnerable where someone can kick me ed: if you had balls you could do really cool shit ed: like start a war marcie: ahahahahahAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA Vanyel: yeah ed: or flip your car 18times end over end Vanyel: war. marcie: i love you ed ed: with a blood alcohol level of .25 Vanyel: i cant believe thsi country supports war so much ed: or have season tickets to a nascar event marcie: hmm, sounds like someone we know marcie: NAHHHH ed: beat your wife marcie: *snork* she'd kill me ed: be an exceptoin to the "no shirt not shoes" rule ed: see marcie: damn ed: having a cock-n-balls has all this fuckin extra cool baggage marcie: all this i'mm missing cause i don't have balls! marcie: well dammit, i'm gonna order a set! -- marcie preparing for life change Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 March 2003 %% Hawkman: i'd like to see wob have sex with yoda -- Hawkman with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 March 2003 %% marcie: cyn, to the dog: "corky, SHUT UP!" (to me) "god, she needs a life." marcie: me: "....uh." Vanyel: ahahahah marcie: i love my wife marcie: truly indeed :) -- marcie the loving spouse Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 March 2003 %% IGadget: I was about to ask if you had to do anything funky in outlook setup but then I realied the whole process is funky -- IGadget achieving enlightenment Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% ed strokes leo's tubesteak Vanyel kicks ed in his beernuts marcie: aw, they like each other Xi: mating rituals of the admin, tonight on the discovery channel -- a new TV show Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Xi: i need to get you a contracting gig to come here and teach the monkeys ed: hmmm. Xi: reflexive acls have them baffled, much like penguins and a laser -- Xi's monkeys need training Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Vanyel: you arent a good test engineer until you can get snow to catch fire. Kestrel: not a problem Kestrel: LOX is my friend -- Kestrel the good test engineer Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Kestrel: I think he got promoted from luser to fuckstick in this last job change -- Kestrel on someone unknown Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% wob: one of the techs is up on the roof shoveling snow saundo: ahahahah wob: half our wireless antennas are buried ;) -- wob during the blizzard Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Moni: smoken radishes saundo: ahahahah Moni: oh Moni: I have jellybeans saundo: how do you keep them lit? saundo: UH oh saundo double takes Moni: with the sparks from my vibrator saundo: ahahahaha Al: *koff* Moni: vroomvroom saundo: ahahahahaha Vanyel: aahahAHAHAHAHAH saundo: it be one of them steam driven vibes Moni: I should call the gf and blow smoke into the phone saundo: don't ask, don't smell -- Moni smoking nothing illegal at all, nosir Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Moni: can't find eingnesslessbbs.org Moni: hm Moni: wonder why? marcie: bahahahah Zorro: snicker marcie: cut & paste, moni, cut & paste -- Moni still smoking non-illegal substances Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Moni: yes,,,ut stiels rudl heive ahrnding marcie falls over laughing Moni: it made snese to me -- Moni speaking in tongues Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Moni: phone ringing...can't find the fucking phone Xi: answer a shoe, its all the same -- Xi helping Moni out Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Manuka: hmm. altoids. {spear|pepper}mint, or wintergreen? saundo: er, ass Moni: ASS Moni: elope Moni: peppermint is better or BJ"s Moni: for Moni: so, if you have a date with wob... saundo makes a note -- saundo getting sex tips Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% Moni: leather transgendered midget rabbi in crotchless chaps, leather vest and nipples exposed Moni: my mother will be so proud -- Moni on the officiant for her wedding Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2003 %% ed: I had a homosexual dream once ed: I woke up in the middle with a start ed: "WTF just fucking happened?" ed: I looked down, saw the wood was halfway there, decided to finish it off anyway. ed: no need to waste good wood -- ed being eminently practical Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2003 %% saundo: my fewllow americans, yip yip yip yip. yip yip yip yip. yours sincerely, George W Bush Vanyel: ahehehe saundo: P.S. I want an aircraft carrier named after me -- saundo on the president's war speech Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2003 %% marcie: goddammit marcie: every time i see dubya marcie: he looks like a retarded chimp Vanyel: ahahah marcie: EVERY FUCKING TIME saundo: you want to rape him with a table? marcie: look Vanyel: joy, rachel got a kick out of your snow pics marcie: at the front page of cnn.com Xi: he IS a retarded chimp marcie: right now saundo: or have his wife bend him over? marcie: it's his "i'm being really sincere" look marcie: but he still looks like a monkey with down's syndrome Xi: you know why he has that look right? saundo: "let's see you choke on a pretzel with it rammed up your ass, monkey boy!" marcie: he's passing gas? Xi: he's droppin a load in his pamper at that very second saundo: ahahahah Vanyel: ahahhehe Vanyel: yeah saundo: a presidential game of Who Farted? marcie: HAHAHAHA Xi: Babs always wins that game Xi: just as vagina sr. Xi: commander in queef Vanyel: you know what I bet really happined Vanyel: some idiot on a navy boat Soney: it's his "this worked iwth mom and dad everytime" look Vanyel: sneezed Vanyel: and hit th efire button prematurely saundo: "My fellow Americans - 30 minutes ago, Saddaym Hooosayn refused to pull my finger. This caused a gas build up in my colon, and so the UN security councils inability to act has made me fart, saundo: gamble and lose" saundo: "My shorts are full of presidential poop, and therefore I have ordered a strike against this evil bastard in the hopes that I can get mom to do a laundry before the shit really hits the fans saundo: good night, and god bless you all, and wipe front to back, people, FRONT TO BACK!" Xi: "My fellow Americans - did you see the look on their faces when that shit went and blowed up? WEEEEE DAWGIES! I ain't seen nothin' like that since paw shawt him a barrr" Vanyel: ahhahhehehe Vanyel: i love you guys -- come get us, FBI motherfuckers Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2003 %% Xi: now why didn't we send in reno Xi: just her marcie: YEAH Vanyel: heheheahahah Xi: nekkid marcie: COMMANDO BITCH saundo: some backdoor shenanigans are just what dubya ordered saundo: ahahahah Xi: the whole fucking middle east would run like hell Vanyel: actually saundo: naked reno with a bottle of oil and a 10" kong dong, and a mean look in her eye Xi: ABALHALBALLAHLABALHAL RENOOOOOO ABLHLAHLABALOBLAHLBALHALBLA Xi: *clickclickclick* saundo: ahahahahahahahahah -- Xi with a solution to the war Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2003 %% Vanyel: whatever my downstairs neighbors are cooking, it smells like rancid vagina -- Vanyel's neighbors Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2003 %% Vanyel: apparently, according to iraq, all those pictures of scores of tanks racing northward were fake. Jake: right... Jake: I did not know "denial" was a stage in modern warfare -- strategy in Gulf War II Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 March 2003 %% Zorro: hmm Zorro: in theory Zorro: if i decapitate myself, my mouh will quit hurting Zorro: HMM -- Zorro contemplating extreme measures Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 March 2003 %% Courtney: hey, in myopinion menstrual week is blow job week Courtney: that kid gets more than he deserves -- Courtho on her boyfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 March 2003 %% Jake: its not over yet? ed: apparently not ed: I just saw them interview some infantry col ed: they're thrusting towards baghdad Jake: THRUSTING wob: ed knows all about that ed: only if baghdad is akin to your ass -- ed on the Iraq War thingy Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 March 2003 %% Sarge pulls down his pants, for his own "Shock and Awe" attack.. -- Sarge displaying his Patriot missile Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 March 2003 %% Slayer: i love watching porn that reflects real life Slayer: take this one for example Slayer: two girls sitting on bed in their undies putting on makeup. then they fuck. Slayer: _just_ like real life Slayer: i know this because my male classmates used to discuss this Slayer: and we were right. here's proof. marcie nods solemnly marcie: that's exactly how it happens. marcie: we didn't want to tell you before, but now that you know Slayer: i knew it marcie: the secrets of lesbian sex... revealed! -- Slayer finding out the big secret Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 March 2003 %% Moni: I have to do jury duty today ed: hmm ed: not if you show up smelling like you haven't bathed in a month ed: and you keep talking to the gnome that lives under your chair. Moni: I'm going to wear my "FUCK THE SYSTEM" t-shirt ed: the soiled maxipad stuck to the outside of your clothing is also useful. Xi: as is a shrunken head on you keychain Kestrel: offensive gas Kestrel: lots of it Xi: which you affectionately refer to as "bubba" Moni: I'm going to go and have a burrito for lunch ed: teeth/testicles on a chain around your neck. Kestrel: chemical attack on the court Xi: a good case of temporary verbalized tourettes is good as well Kestrel: lima beans, scrambled eggs and some raw onion/tomato salad Xi: sprig of brocolli stuck in yoru nostril Sarge: start chanting pro-war, pro-killing things and fill in the judge's name at times Kestrel: tell them it's no problem to serve but you will be channeling a 1880 vintage sasquacth from 10am-3pm daily -- Moni getting advice on jury duty Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 March 2003 %% marcie: i named my vagina "flash" once, but i think i was drunk at the time -- marcie's pet names Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 March 2003 %% sunbeam: james is obviously sick of living sunbeam: he just ate the last brownie and drank all the milk -- pregnant sunbeam on her boyfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 March 2003 %% Slayer: i don't know how much i can take it Slayer: gah that wasy gay Slayer: I bsod'd when I was asleep Slayer: first he puts down all homosexuals, then he, for whatever reason, puts an apostrophe in a past tense verb Slayer: or sh ould that have been homosexual's Slayer: and put's Slayer: maybe even pa'st Vanyel: goddamnit slay Slayer: yes? Slayer: ye's even Slayer: i'm going to macro the s key to be 's Slayer: should make logging into places fun marcie: that wa's lame. Slayer: you can 'say that again marcie: and i 'shall -- the king's and queen's of Engli'sh grammar Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 March 2003 %% cuinhell: i'm imagining the horrors that a mini-series with characters based on personalities here could inflict...and smiling -- cuinhell on casting the EN mini-series Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 March 2003 %% sunbeam: i need to have my toesies painted Slayer: can i paint them in blood? sunbeam: uh that sounds horribly sick, but sure i guess Slayer: i love a girl willing to experiment -- Slayer experimenting Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 March 2003 %% Zorro: van. thaks for typing. you make me feel better -grin- Vanyel: no prob Zorro: heehee ed: hte ayw elo types is smothing to be porud fo -- ed on Vanyelitis Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 March 2003 %% marcie: Your search - "death of a thousand cunts" - did not match any documents. marcie: damn you, google. Jake: google did not fail Jake: YOU failed google Jake: ;) marcie: damn me! zf00d: to hell Cyrano: hahahah Cyrano: damnit, that should be quoted somewhere marcie: as indeed it shall! -- there ya go, jamez Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 March 2003 %% cuinhell: io saw a new raid last night cuinhell: a handicapped person with an assistance dog Kestrel: they are probably rack mounted on his legs for deployment cuinhell: had two of them in the car, only took one in store cuinhell: redundant array of inexpensive dogs Kestrel: HAHAHAHHAH -- cuinhell going to training Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 March 2003 %% Xi: its not every day you can offer a girl a chance to be in a skin flic with a camel and a bucket of guava -- Xi on a hot chick at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 April 2003 %% Zorro: what's in il twink? twinkie: my sex exchange opertaion Vanyel: see why I love this woman? Vanyel: that was a joke, right? -- Vanyel getting a little worried Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 April 2003 %% IG_blah: after being in here, you wonder why I cant interact with normal people? -- iGadget pleading for understanding Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 April 2003 %% Vanyel: well fuck Lia: not on command -- Lia asserting herself Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 April 2003 %% Moni: I've decided that peanut M&M's are going to count as a protein source -- Moni on a diet Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2003 %% JimDrink: fuckk im fucki i fuckingblleeding JimDrink: goutrid t hit me un th ehad a bout 56 timrdx Slayer: what the fuck JimDrink: jeez cuinhell: whoa, he types like slay when he's drunk cuinhell: or leo sober Slayer: who hit you? Slayer: ahahahahhaha -- Jim slightly inebriated Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2003 %% Moni: 'course..it's probably not a good idea to write a cover letter and fix a vitae for a chemical dependency therapist's position, while i"m drinking wine and smoking a bowl marcie: nonsense marcie: hypocrisy is a vital element of psychology marcie: ;) Al: hahahah saundo: it's the hypocritic oath, right? -- saundo the medical expert Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2003 %% ed: dns is not voodoo ed: its been around long enough to seem like it ed: its like one of those thigns that nobody explains well ed: seems to me. ed: like midget porn ed: nobody can explain that sufficiently ed: and then you add midget bukakke to it.. Vanyel: ..and do a zone transfer Vanyel: adn you have DNS Vanyel: tahts what dns is like Vanyel: midget bukakke ed: yes Vanyel: only you have zone files instead of midgets ed: midget bukakke/goldenshower is what DDNS is like. saundo: hrm, midget bukkake dns adventure game ed: if all of it takes place on a boat ed: then, you have midget+bukakke+goldenshower DDNS saundo: on-a-boat ed: in prince william sound saundo: coated in oil Vanyel: OIL SLICK SEAL PORN! saundo: YEAH saundo: sliding seals saundo: pre-lubed ed: only if Captain Hazelwood is also stroking it ed: and clubbing a baby seal with his swollen member saundo: Captain MorningWood Vanyel: ahahAHAHAHA ed: yes Vanyel: goddamn ed ed: hazelmorningwood Vanyel: ed: only if Captain Hazelwood is also stroking it Vanyel: ed: and clubbing a baby seal with his swollen member saundo: ahahahahahah ed: *then* Vanyel: i swear ed: you have DDNS ed: now.. Vanyel: we gotta get ed on the airwaves saundo: *bam*splork* ed: if we want to get into ActiveDirectory + DNS ed: w're gonna have to bring in some backup for the midgets saundo: unhhhhh...UNNNNNH *crack* ed: AD + DDNS saundo: RAIM saundo: twice midgets for the price of one full-sized person ed: I b elieve the backup crew for that would be a pack of syphylltic redass tundra nomads from sibera. Vanyel: active directory is kinda like saundo: midget nomands Vanyel: a bunch of midgets sstanding on each others shoulders Vanyel: to be as tall as a regular person ed: all of which have their own reindeer testicle necklace Vanyel: each midget has a T-shirt with some info on it ed: and there is another midget, wearing a black executioners outfit that keeps clubing the midget at the bottom or the middle of the stack saundo: one testicle per necklace saundo: dude saundo: you're freaking me out Vanyel: ahahaha ed looks innocently. ed looks innocently around ed: ok Vanyel ducks ed: I must go to the airport saundo: ahahahah ed: think I'll get strip searched? *** ed is now known as ported saundo: you wish -- midgets and DNS Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2003 %% Vanyel: oh lord twinkie: hallowed be thy name Moni: thy smoke be done marcie: they kingdom come marcie: ahahahahhahaha marcie: thy bowl be done twinkie: on earth as it is in heaven marcie: on earth as it is in berkeley. Moni: in my pants as it is in others. marcie: give us this day our daily smoke Vanyel: give me my daily vodka marcie: and lead us not into straightness, but deliver us from normalcy. marcie: for thine is the bud, and the smoke, and the ganja forever... amen. marcie bows Moni: marcie rules again Moni: my brain isn't working fast enough marcie: that's me Moni: hmm..wonder why -- the geeks praying Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2003 %% Moni: I want a roast suckling pig wiht an apple in it's mouth. Vanyel: i'll make sure slayer is available Crazy: you want Slayer? Vanyel 5's crazy Moni: bwahahahaha Crazy 5's Vanyel marcie: ahahahahhahahah Slayer: fuck yall -- Moni on her wedding reception Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2003 %% marcie: 5) swallow marcie: 6) repeat -- marcie giving instructions on... something Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 April 2003 %% Zorro: i have reached a new level of disturbedness thanks to en marcie: our job here is done. -- Zorro's corruption becomes complete Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 April 2003 %% IGadget: so what are the chances that we actually got sadam? Jake: who knows Vanyel: well Vanyel: see Vanyel: Iraq has this great thing Sarge: probably about the same as Bin Laden IGadget: its called video tape Vanyel: Redundant Array of Inexperienced Dictators marcie: ahahahahhahahaaha Vanyel: you knock out one Vanyel: and another hotspare lookalike takes his place Vanyel: the ugly one with the glasses is the hotspare -- Vanyel with a theory Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 April 2003 %% ed: I know where you are ed: "you are in a damp twisty cave." Kestrel: hahahahah ed: "There is a sign: Princesses Vagina" cuinhell: HAHAHAHHAHAAAHAHHAHA ed: "There is an acrid smell." Kestrel: stop Kestrel: please marcie: ahaahahahahha IGadget: kes is begging for mercy? ed: "There appears to have been recent activity on the cave walls." ed: "The finger jabs at you." Xi: "judging by the small claw marks of untold tortured small animals" ed: "You dodge.." ed: "It misses." Kestrel: "there is a lantern here" IGadget: "there are multiple scrape marks along the walls" ed: "You have been attacked by a small kobold." Cyrano: You see a set of keys on the ground here. Cyrano: >EXAMINE KEYS Kestrel: ferrte damnit Cyrano: They appear to be for an '86 Ford Bronco. ed: They have a rabbits foot keychain. IGadget: still attached to the rabbit Cyrano: now we can drive the truck out of here. ed: The floor of the cave begins to vibrate wildly. cuinhell: ! cuinhell: RUN! ed: A large phallis is coming for you ed: you find a tunnel to the left Kestrel: that ain't spud then ed: you dive in blindly ed: the phallis misses you Cyrano: oh my sides ed: you have become mired in goo marcie: oh ugh. ed: you struggle ed: the goo has you ed: you struggle ed: the goo has you Kestrel: goddamnit IGadget: your attacked by blind tadpoles marcie: You are in danger of being eaten by a goo. Kestrel: ed Cyrano: >OPEN POCKET Kestrel: stop Cyrano: In your pocket you find a prybar and a gallon sized tub of KY Jelly. marcie: *snork* ed: and a cyanide capsule IGadget: hahaha Kestrel: I will get onto the lay off list for giggling uncontrollably Cyrano: I had tabasco go through my nose ed: BREAK OPEN CAPSULE cuinhell: You hear the pathetic mewlings of a half-squished ferret. ed: the quivvering stops Cyrano: Oddly enough, the smell in the cave improves upon opening the ampoule. ed: you wrench yourself free with crowbar ed: you are now in the main tunnel ed: you feel pressure cuinhell: A cancerous growth strikes at you! Kestrel: clamp down!! ed: a great wind has begun blowing Cyrano: trivia. Kestrel: hahahah Vanyel farts Vanyel: sorry guys Cyrano: As you pass a turn, you see a set of initials carved into the cave: Cyrano: "<- A.S." ed: you grab onto an outcropping in the cave Vanyel: > Carve "S" on wall Kestrel: that's no outcropping ed: you flap uncontrollably in the breeze ed: you have been expelled from the cave Cyrano: You carve the word "elbereth" into the floor. marcie: y'all are so very very wrong Kestrel: "y'all"?? marcie: not that i didn't just paste the entire exchange into the quotes file, mind you -- another adventure for the geeks Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 April 2003 %% ed: all I know about jews I learned on southpark. -- ed learning about cultural diversity Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 2003 %% Cyrano: what's wrong with gallons of battery acid? Vanyel: it's not very good for your skin -- Cyrano on a meth lab bust Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 2003 %% Jim: damned cdrom drive wont read my Windows ME cd.. and they say technology isnt smart.. -- Jim with his smart computer Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2003 %% Cyrano: enjoy the spiciness of the new Kia Cilantro. -- Cyrano thinking up car ads Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2003 %% sunbeam: and i actually wrapped a watermelon fruit roll up around a green olive marcie: sunners sunbeam: hi toots marcie: you have surpassed my sister in the "weird pregnancy foods" category marcie: that's awesome sunbeam: i don't know what made me do it, but it was good -- sunbeam getting ready to pop Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2003 %% sunbeam: james won't play ping pong with me either sunbeam: he's just bitter because i kicked his ass 3 games in a row last night marcie: heheheh sunbeam: plus i beat him at air hockey Vanyel: ahahahah Vanyel: he sucks:) sunbeam: yeah he does sunbeam: last night was the first time I'd ever played air hockey, and who wold've known that I'm amazingly talented marcie: go sunners sunbeam: i knew i had a talent for something other than spelling -- sunbeam the talented one Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2003 %% ed: word.. I had my dump ed: it was relaxing. ed: the monday morning dump is so critical ed: it usually makes or breaks the day, but, it can also set the tone for the week. ed: a clean launching can only mean one thing: ed: Trouble shall come knocking, but, thou shalt approach it with a happy colon. marcie: wow ed marcie: that's like... deep and shit Vanyel: chinese shit litany ed: yes ed: this is the power for a good monday morning shit. ed: clear thought. marcie: shit until your mind clears, and then, young grasshopper, you will have achieved enlightenment Vanyel: when your colon clears, your mind will follow. -- ed and his colon Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 April 2003 %% Lia: when you are writing a letter to accept an offer, what else do you have to say besides "I accept your offer"? marcie: "thank you for considering me, i am pleased to accept your offer of xxxxx" marcie: "i look forward to working with/for/in spite of you" marcie: "sincerely, lia" marcie: or whatever. marcie: i bullshit so well. Cyrano: you need the word "jiggy" in there somewhere. marcie: well, i figured that goes without saying. Cyrano: "I hope that my extensive list of physical and mental abnormalities will fit in well with the general character of the department." Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA marcie: good enough ;) -- Lia weighing grad school options Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 April 2003 %% Lia: the EN island Lia: built out of ramen Lia: that would be interesting -- Lia pondering great things Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 April 2003 %% Vanyel: eject *** cuinhell has been disconnected *** cuinhell has entered room 'Main' Vanyel: woah Vanyel: that was cool -- Vanyel being easily amused Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 April 2003 %% marcie: Bill went to a Cisco seminar on Thursday. He learned that the router IOS marcie: is becoming more smart. marcie: ... marcie: irony, thy name is network admin. marcie beats her head against her desk -- marcie, surrounded by idiots at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 April 2003 %% Cyrano: a latex catsuit, 10 pints of k-y jelly, and thou... -- Cyrano the romantic Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 April 2003 %% Slayer: nice, not only am i getting pron spam, not i'm getting stuff labeled "My big c@ck in your ass" cuinhell: no wonder you never read my messages anymore -- cuinhell with hurt feelings Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2003 %% Vanyel: it really irks me Vanyel: how nature is constantly building a better idiot -- Vanyel lamenting reverse Darwinism Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2003 %% ed: you old fucker Kestrel: damn right Kestrel: old Kestrel: and old enough to have accumulated the contacts and wealth to make you dissipear should you annoy my cranky old ass -- Kestrel the elderly Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2003 %% ed: jesus fuckting crist on a pogostick hopping through a parkinglot full of fucking skulls -- ed having a good day Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2003 %% twinkie: i would want a slut twinkie: dressed up as wonderwoman marcie: well who wouldn't! saundo: uh oh twinkie: not that stupid usual slut stuff saundo sounds the slut klaxon twinkie: hahahaha saundo: we have a wonder woman reference! saundo: we have a wonder woman reference! marcie: yes marcie: we certainly do marcie: POINTY BOOBS marcie: YEAH! twinkie: hahahaha twinkie: catwoman! saundo: ROWR twinkie: nah i just think it would be stupid twinkie: to have a party with action hero sluts marcie: no marcie: that woule rule. saundo: superman doing tap sculls from the keg saundo: batman hurling behind the couch marcie: robin holding batman's hair while he hurls and making "tsk tsk" noises twinkie: spiderman from the ceiling saundo: wonder woman stoned, sitting out on the diving board naked as jaybird marcie: batman mumbling "stop nagging me" to robin between hurlings twinkie: no twinkie: thats my job saundo: the green lantern streaking through the house with a green-filtered flashlight up his ass saundo: screaming "the GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN LANTERN farts again!" twinkie: oh my marcie: and let's not even talk about the brown hornet twinkie: oh my! twinkie: actually i think it would be fun to have a party saundo: captain america eating twinkie after twinkie twinkie: with the big lebowski theme marcie: daredevil doing stupid party tricks involving what's under the hostess' clothing meg: phone's ringing dude saundo: ahahahah meg: thank you donny -- Justice League parties Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 April 2003 %% T: my Mom came up with an idea that would sell in the zillions if she could patent it and get someone to design it T: but I can't see anybody actually attempting to market a "fart vacuum" -- T with a great idea Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 April 2003 %% Cyrano: I have taken four sudafed today, and now I can't blink. Cyrano: eyeballs...turning...into...sandpaper... -- Cyrano trying to cut back Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2003 %% Jake: BOMB THE SOUTH Zorro: jake........ lemme move first? please? Jake: NO Jake: no mercy for the wicked! Zorro: motherfucker. i will come haunt you Zorro: i will possess yer keyboard -- Zorro with a real threat Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2003 %% *Zorro* if im ever compared to k again i swear i'll find a way to seek revenge -- Zorro plotting vengeance Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 April 2003 %% Vanyel: christ Vanyel: nothing like the urge to kill the second I walk in the fucking door. -- Vanyel enjoying his job Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 April 2003 %% ed: its all about bodily fluids in your enemies personal spaces ed: dont' let anybody tell you otherwise. -- ed on great vengeance and furious anger Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 April 2003 %% saundo: BREAK ZIPPER IN CASE OF EMERGENCY -- saundo with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 April 2003 %% Lia: never heard a cello joke Lia: ever Lia: only ever heard 2 string jokes saundo: you don't need to saundo: it's a CELLO Lia: :P -- saundo the ex-trumpet player Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 April 2003 %% Xi: lart him with an unused coworker -- Xi with advice on marcie's boss Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 April 2003 %% ed: apple still fucks you ed: but marcie: they use lube ed: they kiss you first, and they use a bit of lube marcie: lots of lube marcie: yes marcie: whereas mickeysoft still dryfucks you with no warning Cyrano: ow. ed: windows yanks you 1500 armani pants down, flips you face side down into a vat of squirming electricrified maggots and goes at your ass with a 1975 carmen ghia marcie: exactly marcie: apple even calls you the next day marcie: mickeysoft leaves you with an unpaid bar tab and an STD. ed: in an expensive penthouse suite marcie: yeah ed: and they steal your wallet, credit cards, identity and shove them into pASSport and Vlad the Bulgarian script kiddie buys 1500 used condoms on an ebay auction using your info. marcie: ah marcie: i see you've adminned IIS. -- marcie and ed on software companies Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 April 2003 %% Cyrano: why waste time with puny drugs like alcohol and nicotime when there's chocolate? -- Cyrano with a good point Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 April 2003 %% Vanyel: and I hate perl jam. marcie: perl jam? Vanyel: yes. Vanyel: perl jam marcie: all right then Vanyel: i.e. eddie "whining like a rich white boy" vedder Vanyel: oh Vanyel: pearl jam Vanyel: goddamnit Vanyel: I didnt even fucking notice I did tat marcie: heheh marcie: i wasn't going to say anything ;) -- Vanyel lacking sleep Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2003 %% saundo: given the quality of work that i see from my own people, i no longer wonder why there are stains on the restroom ceilings -- saundo on quality control Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2003 %% twinkie: i got an autistic kid to sit still for a while so that counts for something twinkie: amazing what masking tape can do -- twinkie educating our youth Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 April 2003 %% Cyrano: sleepy Vanyel: you arent sleepy until you see giant pink butterflies pass you on the san mateo bridge -- Vanyel one-upping Cyrano Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 April 2003 %% cuinhell: i am become root, destroyer of lusers -- cuinhell wielding his powah Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2003 %% Slayer: if i named my kid 'mary jane' what's the likelihood that either her or her mother would castrate me cuinhell: less than the likelihood that the woman would commit suicide after finding out she'd let you impregnate her Slayer: how's your momma doing anyway? cuinhell: try harder Slayer: didn't have to try at all. she rolled over like the french army. cuinhell: i could unignore zorro and get better jabs wob: maybe, but you wouldn't be able to read them -- slap fight! Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2003 %% cuinhell: HAHAHHAHAHHAHA i've got an STD on Postal 2 cuinhell: now i take damage when i pee -- cuinhell playing a game Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 May 2003 %% firl: some days I wake up and still ask myself what the fuck i'm doing in texas. -- firl having a moment of self-doubt Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2003 %% cuinhell: slackers of the world unite (when you get around to it) -- cuinhell with a call for action or something Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2003 %% cuinhell: lusers would be better behaved if they knew we could eat them at the least provocation -- cuinhell on managing his users Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2003 %% sunbeam: i wish i had a little personal slave that followed me around to rub my feet marcie puts on sackcloth and ashes and follows sunners around sunbeam: scratch personal slave and insert half naked cabana boy with pina coladas marcie: aw, damn marcie: that lets me out marcie: ;) -- marcie being disappointed Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2003 %% Cyrano: the door is melting. twinkie: sure twinkie: melting? Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: I hate it when the door melts marcie: me too Cyrano: maybe I should have looked at that mushroom omelate more closely -- Cyrano eating strange food Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2003 %% Vanyel: i got a keyring stuic on myt fdnger Vanyel: brb -- Vanyelitis strikes again! Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2003 %% wob: mmm. wob: jewdick. -- wob sighing for what he's missing Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 May 2003 %% marcie: i hear the dulcet tones of shitboss's voice marcie: it grates on my ears like sandpaper marcie: ah, monday. marcie bows marcie: thank you very much -- marcie reciting beat poetry Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 May 2003 %% ed: go go gadget anger -- ed harnessing his rage Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 May 2003 %% sunbeam: have i mentioned how ready I am for this baby to be out? sunbeam: it's too hard to ignore him when he's kicking the crap out of me from the inside sunbeam: i'm ready to start the neglect sunbeam curls up on the couch and eats a banana cuinhell: oooo ooo oo can i be your inconsiderate abusive boyfriend? sunbeam: totally cuinhell: awesome cuinhell: i'll be in sunny ca in june, so be ready Vanyel: can i be your insonsiderate abusive person you chean on your boyfriend with? sunbeam: cool, my birthday is in june sunbeam: yeah leo i need one of those marcie: can i be the lesbian best friend who seduces you away from both the inconsiderate abusive boyfriends? sunbeam: yeah my life is going to rule marcie: sweet! cuinhell: wait until I morph into the hateful serial killer of everyone you once knew, it'll be a riot! cuinhell: i've already negotiated the TV movie rights sunbeam: and the whole time i'll be neglecting my child and doing drugs and being a hooker on the side cuinhell: WERD!@ marcie: excellent cuinhell: you must have read the script draft -- sunbeam lining up her future plans Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 May 2003 %% Cyrano: I got lunch and got a little open container of habenero sauce Cyrano: as I'm walking back, a small fly buzzes around and lands in it Cyrano: dies instantly. -- Cyrano's sauce is mighty Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 May 2003 %% Jake: Poll: Americans Optimistic on Economy Jake: where the fuck does this poll data come from??? Jake: which fucking americans? Jake: where? Jake: they keep 1000 of the dumbest fucking americans in a cage just for poll data -- Jake ranting Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 May 2003 %% Cyrano: why do we lose it Cyrano: the joy of seeing a single raindrop on a leaf Cyrano: the rush of wind against the trees Cyrano: the deer mowing down bicyclists Cyrano: second one this month. -- Cyrano making observations on life Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 May 2003 %% marcie: wtf marcie: is wrong with you Slayer: did your wife leave you for your boss's boss? ed: no Slayer: then it aint all that bad IGadget: ed, have a bagel ed: if she did, though ed: that'd be cool ed: my bosses boss is his wife ed: and that could be fun to watch. -- ed on a rampage Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 May 2003 %% marcie: cool marcie: i downloaded a mini-animation app for my palm marcie: i just drew an 8-frame animation of my boss's head exploding. marcie: i can see this is going to be one of my favorite apps. DontKnow: cool marcie: hey, it's cheaper than therapy -- marcie recovering Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 May 2003 %% Vanyel: if I had a hammer Vanyel: i'd hammer lusers in the morning Vanyel: i'd hammer lusers in the evening, for sending me spam Vanyel: i'd hammer ralsky. I'd hammer spamford! -- Vanyel singing a little song Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 2003 %% saundo: ass marcie: ass! Vanyel: penis. marcie: vagina. saundo: rectum saundo: don't do it Vanyel: nostrils marcie: anus saundo: urethra Vanyel: eardrum cuinhell: duodenum marcie: sinuses Vanyel: gills marcie: perineum saundo: intestine cuinhell: cockles marcie: testicles saundo: scrotum cuinhell: sheepdip saundo: sheepdip? marcie: australia! saundo: australia australia, we love you - crack a tube! Vanyel: fuck austrailia saundo: i'll relay the message next time i'm home marcie: roight, that concludes the reading of the rules -- bruce! *** saundo is now known as bruce bruce: alright bruce Vanyel: bunch of uppity upside down englishmen in denial bruce: mind if I call you bruce to keep it clear? *** cuinhell is now known as bruc3 bruc3: sure thing bruce *** Vanyel is now known as br00ce *** marcie is now known as brewce bruce: ahahahaha bruce: *** br00ce Vanyel Main bruce: *** bruc3 cuinhell Main br00ce: god we're sad brewce: yes bruce: *** bruce saundo Main brewce: yes we are bruce: *** brewce Marcie Main bruc3: heheh bruc3: this is bruce, brewce br00ce: there used to be a bug in ebbs bruce: hello bruce br00ce: where you could put a space after a chatid br00ce: how are ya bruce? bruce: good bruce bruce: crack a tube bruce: and now, the lord's prayer brewce: oi'd loike to ask the padre to lead us in a preeyar bruce: oh lord, we beseech thee, amen! brewce: amen! crack a tube! br00ce: god brewce: *sshhhhk* *** br00ce is now known as Vanyel *** bruc3 is now known as cuinhell *** bruce is now known as saundo *** brewce is now known as marcie saundo: well that was refreshing marcie: *** br00ce is now known as Vanyel marcie: *** bruc3 is now known as cuinhell marcie: *** bruce is now known as saundo marcie: *** brewce is now known as marcie marcie: i love it saundo: bruce, the pause that refreshes -- the geeks being very very bored Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 2003 %% Jake: damnit Jake: its STARTING marcie: what Jake: I feel THE FEAR marcie: the dread? marcie: ahahah marcie: yeah! Jake: ahahahaha marcie: i know that dread. marcie: i know it well. marcie: altho marcie: mine is worse marcie: i have to go to mississippi when i go home. Jake: ehhh marcie: ;) Jake: new mexico/miss are oretty much interchangeable as far as suckiness goes Jake: er pretty much marcie: this may be true marcie: but we have better public restrooms ;) Jake: I remember when you guys beat us out fot #1 in drunk driving Jake: nm was so pissed marcie: ah, we were so proud! marcie: ahahahahhahaah Jake: oh and the ever popular race for 50th in education Jake: or poverty marcie: oh, we've got that one pretty much tied up Jake: those were the big ones if I remember marcie: except for arkansas Jake: damned mississippi! marcie: they come in last and fuck us up sometimes Jake: taking are well-deserved accolades marcie: damned arkanas! marcie: see, i can't even spell! marcie: fucking arkansas. -- Jake preparing to go home to New Mexico Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2003 %% Al: "Kwee-san?" "Yes, Ota" "In this server, the Iron Tech is combining Ultra320 Hard disks with an advanced RAID controller!" saundo: ahahahahahah saundo: fiber channel-sakai! Al: yes! saundo: the god of storage area networking! IGadget: was it made by atto? Al: "The challenger says that the Iron Tech's disks will overpower the other ingredients in this server, so instead he is using Serial ATA with an IDE boot drive." IGadget: yich Al: "oh...I've never seen that before...*giggle*" Vanyel: ahahahah Al: "yes, I believe it's commonly done in Gateway recipes." saundo: at which point the hardware floozy du jour is hit with a table Al: hmm. now I want a set of wooden spoons with interchangeable phillips driver bits. -- Iron Tech! Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 May 2003 %% Vanyel: why is it as soonas I get ready to go, the turd thats been stuck in the chamber decides to come out Xi: because it doesn't like the commute -- Vanyel's bowels rebelling Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 May 2003 %% Slayer: i'm apparently so evil that i don't even have to try anymore -- Slayer accomplishing his life dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 2003 %% Slayer: i love the smell of a hindi man's ass after a night of curry binging -- Slayer with one of his favorite things Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 May 2003 %% Cyrano: could be that active desktop got roached AlFK: what did you do, log in? -- Al doing Windows troubleshooting Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 May 2003 %% Cyrano: Extended Unix octal mode bits are *hard*. -- Cyrano speaks truth Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2003 %% Cyrano: maybe leo and I could do a road trip Cyrano: kind of like thelma and louise, but without the dying part. IGadget: going to be packing heat? Cyrano: naah, just 50 gigs of mp3's -- Cyrano and Vanyel going to Moni's wedding Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2003 %% sunbeam: i was so excited over his first dirty diaper sunbeam: now, the excitement is definitely waning -- sunbeam the new mommy Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2003 %% Vanyel: play mp3's via lpr marcie: sick. Vanyel: actaully Vanyel: it makes some warped sense Vanyel: queue management Vanyel: in fact Vanyel: http://tinyurl.com/cj5w Vanyel: it us actually a great hack Vanyel: the more I think about it marcie: SICK marcie: mind you marcie: that doesn't mean i won't try to get it working Vanyel: hheeh -- Vanyel and marcie being sick and geeky Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2003 %% Vanyel: sometimes you just have to let someone do something you dont want them to do, to keep them out of your hair ed: or Cyrano: what, like breathing? Vanyel: well that -- Vanyel learning patience Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 May 2003 %% Slayer: spoken like a man who's never accidentally superglued a condom on before -- Slayer talking about his sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 May 2003 %% ed: if you're thinking hard-boiled eggs in a tubesock ed: you'll get a good bag massage ed: if you're thinking mexican crack-whore lookin for that white rock in the base of your being, you're talking super vacuum suck ed: if you're thinking peanut-butter lickin lesbian, you'll get a sloppy knob job ed: dont' think about vampires workin a blood sausage, though... ed: unless you're into that. marcie: dude, you are so damn weird saundo: this, as they say marcie, is an understatement -- ed on blowjobs Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 May 2003 %% Xyll: hey marcie - any idea which word u smispelled back there? marcie: Xyll: hey marcie - any idea which word u smispelled back there? marcie: i think it was the word "irony". -- marcie battling the unarmed Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2003 %% Xi: knowing the NSA, they're cracking crypto Xi: or making better crypto Xi: once you have the key, opening the door is merely a small act ed: they're using it to figure out how to get to first base with your sister Xi: AHAHAHAHAHAHA ed: after 10 days of computing Xi: one answer comes up ed: the NSA's keycracker spits out "42" and then bursts into flames.. IGadget: damn, I dont even have a sister Xi: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- the future of crypotography Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2003 %% ed coldboots marcie marcie: kinky Xi: whoa ed jackboots wob Xi: boot lesbian:b ed: boot> ed: boot> lesbian marcie: :) ed: loading 3233343x2434334 LESBIAN ed: ........waiting for carpet check..... ed: .......carpet check complete....... ed: init ed: starting Secure Sexual Hologram marcie: hahaha Xi: dd if=/dev/tongue of=/lesbian bs=1024 count=-1 IGadget: %%%%% ERROR: Nothing to put init ed: apache quad headed dildo starting Xi: asspache ed: login: ed: root ed: password: Xi: l3sb14n Crazy asks marcie to firgive them, they're just jealous you get more women than they do :) marcie grins marcie: i'm actually quite flattered ;) Xi: LesbianBSD ed: amazon on gspot% ed: ls Xi: ls -ialrt ed: leather Xi: ls -ilart ed: rm /dev/penis ed: cat /dev/null /dev/cumshot Xi: makedev UNCLEFISTY2K ed: '/etc/cumshot ed: ln -s /dev/penis /dev/dildo -- the new DykeBSD OS Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2003 %% Cyrano: lesbian biker nuns. marcie: where? Cyrano: had some weird dreams marcie: knowing you? i have no doubt about this. -- Cyrano showing off Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2003 %% Vanyel: oh woah. Vanyel: explosives found at a ups store marcie: eesh IGadget: mail bombs etc. -- the replacement for the USPS Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2003 %% cqafk: he was all loopy on demerol injections last night cqafk: "say, have you seen that little elf?" cqafk: "he's a good elf" cqafk: (sleep) Toby: lol Toby: I was lke that after my knee surgery cqafk: his mum asks him "did the elf take your testicle, taguen" cqafk: taguen: ohh baaaad elf" cqafk: (sleep) ed: mahahahaha cqafk: it was fun. -- Court's boyfriend after testicle surgery Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2003 %% Vanyel: so annoyed Vanyel: see Vanyel: I realised something Vanyel: I understand hitler now Vanyel: jews in groups can be SO FUCKING ANNOYING Vanyel: ARGH -- Vanyel on his Israeli-based employer Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2003 %% Vanyel: is zippy dating someone with kids? Slayer: no Vanyel: no, the other zippy Slayer: who is the other zippy Vanyel: the pinhead Slayer: i dare you to make sense Vanyel: ahahahah Vanyel: thats a tall order -- Vanyel ducking a dare Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 June 2003 %% Jake: this place is too damned quiet w/o ed marcie: ain't it the truth Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: i have a few mins tho Vanyel: so Vanyel runs into the nearest phone booth Vanyel: and emerges... *** Vanyel is now known as edyel edyel: goddamnit cunty Jake: bahahahaha marcie: ahahahah edyel: what are you laughing at, twitnipple marcie: YEAH! Jake: ah yes marcie: COCKDRIBBLE! edyel: goddamnit edyel: I swear edyel: the phone rings edyel: it never ends marcie: "fucking techs!" edyel: damn monkeys Jake: fuckwit Jake: fuckwad edyel: watch your pussylicker, penisbleeder -- Vanyel trying to keep us entertained Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2003 %% Cyrano: I have a wok, a stick of butter, and a bag of chocolate cookies. -- Cyrano with a threat Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 June 2003 %% ed: goddamn ed: the beer is good in the northwest ed: my fuckin liver had to go on the plane as carry-on baggage. -- ed back from vacation Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 2003 %% Vanyel: you know Vanyel: windows XP is kinda nice Vanyel: its much easier to ddos than win2k -- Vanyel giving XP propz Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 June 2003 %% ed hands leo a pair of khaki slacks ed hands leo a sly, weasely grin ed hands leo a handful of company pens and other schwag ed slaps leo on the ass "Go make daddy proud! Sell Sell Sell!" marcie grins marcie: ed! remember Vanyel: ed. marcie: DO NOT TAUNT HAPPY FUN SALESENGINEER! -- Vanyel being tormented Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 June 2003 %% Vanyel: i sawear Vanyel: one day meg and slayt are gonna end up having hot sex meg: is that one of your fetishes slay Vanyel: you knot ey secretly like eacho ther Slayer: only if i'm passed out and tied up -- wuv, twue wuv... Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2003 %% Vanyel: testickle! Vanyel: I have several -- Vanyel bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2003 %% Cyrano: you're not drunk if you can lie on the ground without hanging on. -- Cyrano with a guideline Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2003 %% marcie: i must clean this goddamn room marcie: afk to get a broom and a flamethrower -- marcie breaking out the big guns Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 2003 %% marcie: holy shit marcie: i put up a mini-shelf and it's level, even marcie: go me marcie flexes Al stares Vanyel: bitch! tishy: a true dyke Vanyel: shes even got vests! tishy: can put up a straight shelf, and have it be the only thing straight in her life marcie: ahahah marcie: HAHAHAHAHAHA Al: hahahahaha -- tishy complimenting marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 2003 %% Vanyel: schompthing is vfrong marcie: Vanyel: schompthing is vfrong marcie: such as your typing? Vanyel: thats normal. marcie: oh yeah -- Vanyelitis strikes again Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 June 2003 %% Cyrano: Everything I Needed To Know I Learned From The Marcie Quotefile. -- Cyr solidifying her life philosophy Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 June 2003 %% saundo: and today's random sport for data center ops - server tipping! -- saundo being a jock Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 June 2003 %% sunbeam: he's absolutely adorable, possibly the cutest baby ever born Marianne: of course sunbeam: i'm not just saying that because he's mine and he almost killed me -- sunners on her new spawnling Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Cyrano: that's one fringe benefit to parenthood Cyrano: I no longer fear any bodily fluids. -- Cyr the good parent Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% tishy: and leo, you can feed me grapes and stuff Vanyel: oh gee can I? tishy is injured, ya know tishy: keep begging like that and you might get places ;) Cyrano: fantasie impromptu op.66 Cyrano: you know, just *reading* this gives me chills Vanyel: get where? tishy: um tishy: places Vanyel: ok Vanyel feeds tishy coldstone tishy: oh god yes! tishy orgasms Slayer: what is coldstone and where can i get some? if it does taht wto women tishy: its when you take your dick and stick it in the freezer for an hour tishy: you should try it Moni: heh tishy: wait, you probably have already Vanyel: C>N|K tishy hands leo a towel marcie snickers Vanyel: whoever sais "/a milky ways" gets a baseball bat in the genitals. Slayer almond joys firl: hehehe Vanyel smacks slay in the nuts with fabby's head firl: hey wait. tishy: ahahaha Slayer: no no, keep it coming Vanyel: ok tishy: brb, on the great dvd remote hunt Vanyel cmacks slay in the genitals with monty's head firl: much better Slayer: not from my perspective Vanyel: you'll get over it. Cyrano: hah -- cold stone slayer's dick! Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Slayer: why is courtney having sex appropriate, but me jerking off not Moni: because court is hot -- Moni laying down the law Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Moni: at that point, GF starts screaming "ElEPHANT ELEPANT ELEPHANT" -- Moni's strange, strange sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Vanyel: I usually scream my own name. -- Vanyel on HIS strange sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% tishy: we really should have a NestOrgy one of these days marcie: uhh marcie: i'd be scared of that IRL Al: only one? Vanyel: yeah. marcie: unless it was just you, me, china, meg and moni Vanyel: becaue DK would be there. tishy: ok Al: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA saundo: UGH Al: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA tishy: invite only Al: HAAHAHAHAAHAHAHA marcie: ahahahahah saundo kicks vanyel saundo: you ARE EVIL Vanyel: nobody ever believes me. tishy: i do! saundo: i didn't believe you, but now I do saundo: you fucker -- the EN orgy! Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Moni: pot fucks up my fingers Moni: good thing I'm not having sex -- Moni having a good time Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% marcie: i had a 3 inch clit! -- marcie bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Moni: splish splash I was getting fucked in the ass Moni: long about a saturday night -- Moni with her ideal weekend Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Moni: assflecks Moni: oh..that sounds bad -- Moni babbling to herself Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% Vodkyel: how the fuck Vodkyel: does a gorilla get named donkey kong marcie belches happily marcie: they misspeelled it Vodkyel: really/ marcie: it was supposed to be donkey dong Vodkyel: AHAHAHAHAH marcie: but they misspleled the box saundo: ahahahahahah marcie: and then they had to cover for their mistake Vodkyel: ok marcie: and make it a gorillia isntead f a mule or whatever marcie: and marcie: um Vodkyel: but where did the donkey come from saundo: so they put the gorilla in saundo: ahahahaha marcie: its possible i'm drunk saundo: nah Vodkyel: joy saundo: perish the thought Vodkyel: i love you marcie: i love you too loe ;) marcie: erm marcie: leo marcie: godamit Vodkyel: LOE!!!!~ Vodkyel: LOE LOE LOE! Vodkyel: ahahaha marcie: fck you saundo: you are hereby now know as "Level Of Effort" marcie: ahahah goddammit marcie: FUCK YOU -- marcie and Vanyel, possibly intoxicated Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2003 %% > Getting ridiculed by an online geek community is one indication that you > have a life. and to make this comment on a BBS is further proof that you are in desperate need of one. -- Zorro responding to K Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2003 %% IGadget: semi naked I would take to men either not top or no bottom IGadget: I swear the complex pool needs a solar pool cover marcie: you have the most fascinating babble, gadget -- IGadget rambling Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 2003 %% ed: hate us not ed: for we are the feces monkeys -- ed lamenting his lot Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 2003 %% saundo: ok saundo: 10:30 Vanyel: later saundass saundo: wel, 10:24 Vanyel: GO tishy: fantasy hour over? saundo: and there has been no fantasies erupt saundo: this, as they say, is disappointing tishy: go find the lesbians tishy: i can't do this single-handed -- tishy in need of assistance Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 2003 %% saundo: Lesbian to the rescue! marcie leers Vanyel: bad joy. Vanyel: no donut. marcie: yes. marcie: YES saundo: ahahahah saundo: ba dum ba ting! Vanyel: there is no donut. tishy pictures marcie in a tight bodysuit with a big L on the front Vanyel: there is only hole. marcie snickers zag: hm tishy: Lesbian Girl tishy: and her sidekick, Butch Dyke Vanyel: look! in the sky! Vanyel: it's a carpet! Vanyel: no! saundo: it's a rug! marcie: ahahahahahha saundo: it's a flying harness! marcie: what is that huge flapping thing! marcie: it's... a tongue! and a pair of teeth! saundo: it's Dyke Girl! and Butchy BoyGirl! Vanyel: strange lesbian from another planet who can lick to the center of a tootsie roll pop in three licks tishy: oh, its Captain Strap-on! marcie: RUGMUNCHER POWERS ACTIVATE! Vanyel: AHAHAHAHAHAH saundo: Commander Strapon and Ensign Lube-o-tron! Vanyel: marcie: RUGMUNCHER POWERS ACTIVATE! saundo: you're going on a journey, a journey of sight, sound, and licking, you're entering - the DYKE ZONE marcie strikes a pose, fists on hips and chest out, as the sunshine glints off her teeth with a *ting* saundo: ahahahahah Vanyel: god Vanyel: this was the worst movie Vanyel: EVER saundo: there's a wonder woman joke here somewhere tishy sneaks up behind marcie and tweaks her nipples marcie: keep digging, saundo marcie jumps saundo: ahahahahah saundo puts the hard hat on tishy: they were sticking out saundo: i'll be back from the depths of my mind tishy: i just HAD to! saundo: the a/c is on Vanyel: her high beams are on tishy: oooh, its scary back there marcie hands saundo a flashlight anda canary -- marcie rescuing tish from the evil evil men Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 2003 %% Moni: arugh..my tits itch Moni: think I"ll let them be free -- moni, itching for relief (ba dum ba ting!) Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 2003 %% Cyrano: smurf genocide. cuinhell: i always, secretly, hoped gargamel would win. Vanyel: i wanted to be gargamel when i grew up cuinhell: buy a cat and live your dream -- cuinhell, charter member of PETA Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 June 2003 %% marcie: cynthia just called me up to tell me she's coming to pick me up marcie: "you know, uh, i was thinking that could, you know, celebrate the uh..." Cyrano: mmm marcie: "the supreme court decision?" marcie: "why yes!" Cyrano: damnit straight! Cyrano: er marcie: "it never was illegal in this state, you know." marcie: "so? it was illegal somewhere! celebrate! woo hoo!" marcie: "you are SO goddamn WEIRD." Cyrano: I am cracking up here marcie: so was i marcie: i'm still chuckling Cyrano: have fun celebrating Vanyel: ahahaahh Vanyel: damn straight marcie: oh i will ;) -- celebrating the sodomy laws being overturned Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 June 2003 %% china: Yes, he is dead. My work here is done. -- china on Strom Thurmond Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 June 2003 %% Sarge: men in a titty bar are like woman in a shoe store.. they want to see every pair regardless of the size.. -- Sarge with a poignant observation Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2003 %% firl: ugh. called into work early Vanyel: the batfone rang? Vanyel: you hadda come in? firl: its hard to say no to commissioner gordon Vanyel: "Abby. We need you in the office. 200 screaming harry potter fans are rioting. They need those books@ GET IN HERE!" -- firl the Librarianatrix Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2003 %% Cyrano: maybe a portable defibrillator just for fun Cyrano: "running kazaa? CLEAR!" -- Cyr on what to carry in her purse Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2003 %% Vanyel: i need a cool theme song Vanyel: chicks dig a cool theme song. lisa: hell yeah. that's why mr. rogers was so hot. marcie: hahhhaha Vanyel: nah Vanyel: i think it was his striptease, actually Vanyel: shit Vanyel: now I have this burlesque version of the miuster rogers theme going through my head marcie: ahahahahahahahahahahah marcie: congrats, leo marcie: you have sunk to new lows marcie: welcome to life with slayer Vanyel: it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood *BOMP* Vanyel: its a beautiful day ith a neighbor *BOMP* lisa: la la la Vanyel: wont you be.... miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine. Vanyel: *winks coquetishly* -- vanyel desecrating our childhood memories Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2003 %% marcie: i have a new religion marcie: i now follow the matrix Al: ? Vanyel: ahehehe marcie: and let me tell you why marcie: because the matrix has 1) cool music 2) cool shades, and 3) cool music marcie: oh, and trinity. marcie: can't forget that. -- marcie seeing the light, hallelujah! Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2003 %% Vanyel: i will gladly pay you tuesday Vanyel: for a blowjob today. -- vanyel with an offer we can't refuse Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2003 %% lisa: he is such a horrible actor lisa: it's sad lisa: i cry for him. Vanyel: well yeah Al: ha lisa: not really, but if i cared i would Vanyel: its bill from bill and ted Vanyel: saving the world marcie: it's ted Vanyel: "woah. I killed an agent." marcie: he played ted marcie: it's sad that i know that. Vanyel: "EXCELLENT!" *air guitars* marcie: hahaha lisa: actually his worst was on speed lisa: "there's a bomb. on. the. bus" Vanyel: yyeagh Al: did he do anything that wasn't total crap between bill & ted and the matrix? Vanyel: "there's a bomb, on. he bus." Vanyel: "excellent!" *air guitars* lisa: hah -- the crew on Keanu Reeves Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2003 %% Vanyel: you dont know pain till you catcgh you nipple in electric cliuppers. -- Vanyel, in such pain he can't type Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 June 2003 %% ed shoves his manmeat in wobs mouth ed: shaddup wob: geesus knock it off wob: i dont need a toothpick right now -- wob complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2003 %% saundo: like a rat out of an aqueduct Vanyel: so are the days of our lives -- as the Nest turns Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2003 %% firl: quick. firl: someone tell me what motivates me Al: what motivates you? Al: your nether regions, when they quiver with urgency, as your entire being shakes with the desire of your lover's touch? marcie: um marcie: settle down there, beavis firl: no, probably not. Al: been watching too many bad SNL reruns I think Al: what motivates you firl: pretend you're at a job interview. Al: your desire to live well by better serving humanity? firl: or rather *I* am. meg: say you're trying to become a wino meg: but you need to be able to afford the good stuff meg: so you dont have headaches when you come into work marcie: ahahah firl: hehehehe marcie: i like that one firl: meg, that is the right answer, I thnk meg: ;) firl: i'm gonna call you on my cell phone if i need any other gems during my interview firl: make sure you're up by 9 a.m. marcie: that would be 8AM mountain time, meggers marcie: <-- helpful firl: :) marcie: chop chop! firl: she'll be up! firl: meg, maybe you should go to bed now... firl: so you're well rested. meg: ahahha marcie: yeha meg marcie: you need to get rested marcie: for firl's interview tomorrow firl: now meg, you'll need tocome up with some other good stuff firl: like my strengths and weaknesses firl: and maybe why i'm the best person for the job firl: and hmmmm meg: because you are the best librarian with retardation IGadget: strengths thighs, weaknesses chocolate and Ice cream marcie: YES firl: i can spontaneously drool during the interview if you think it will help my chances... meg: hah firl: or do you mean my patrons are the retards? :) IGadget: hahaa meg: tell em if they dont hire you that you'll go dewey decimal on their asses firl: ahahahahaha firl: If they don't hire me, I'm going to throw their library into total HX821 firl: wait. maybe thats not ararchy meg: uh oh there is that ferocious librarian wit firl: maybe i should look that up firl: anarchy meg: use that to your advantage Al: conan the librarian? firl: wit and a large sword -- firl the Librarianatrix Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2003 %% marcie: "get down there and start licking!" Moni: lick em good -- Moni and marcie with a common bond Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 July 2003 %% marcie: moni can write porn without even realizing it -- marcie bragging on Moni Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 July 2003 %% meg: hm i got an email about "dirty stripers" ed: awesome ed: my wife got email about penis enlargement ed: I got one about lactating lasses meg: i could bust her walls apart with my enormous pole meg: if only i opened that email meg: why am i passing up such fantastic opportunities -- meg's fascinating spam Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 2003 %% marcie: damn the phone needs to quit ringing saundo: a leatherman and the phone cord saundo: sorted. -- saundo with a solution for the hell desk Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 2003 %% saundo: more penis enlargement spam Cyrano: "make penis fast"? -- Cyrano with creative spam Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 2003 %% saundo: cd /usr/sex/linux saundo: hrm saundo: i think my fingers are trying to tell me something -- saundo needing recovery Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 July 2003 %% Moni woke up for the third day with a headache Vanyel: getting enough iron? Vanyel: or water? Moni: I think it's my retainer Moni: and no, i'm probably not getting enough iron Moni: which would explain why I'm tired all the time. cuinhell leaps on moni and hits her with a 9 iron Moni: oh..I feel SO much better now -- cuinhell looking after Moni's health Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 2003 %% bitched: I had these two huge 100lb bags of meat sittin in the passenger seat of my truck Cyrano: it almost sounds like a sorority -- ed on his meat Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 2003 %% ed: stupidity stalks you ed: day and night ed: stupidity is the grim reapers cousin, lenny ed: the one that couldn't get a fuckin job because of his hair int he 70's ed: but now he's back Vanyel: ahahahah ed: the computer having provided him with more work than he can handle -- ed on stupidity Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 2003 %% Cyrano: this one reminded me of newt gingrich -- Cyrano on the product of her bowels Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 2003 %% Vanyel: i am now in stage two intestinal destress -- Vanyel with an update on *his* bowels Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 2003 %% china: ya know, I had an interesting conversation kinda happen the other day china: I'm not sure if I just volunteered for a threesome or not -- China having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 2003 %% wob: abbyfirl firl: wob :) wob: beat any people with a book today? firl: only one, but he deservedit. -- the Librarianatrix with punishment Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 2003 %% Veritech: oracle makes baby jesus cry -- Veritech with advice on databases Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 2003 %% K: i thikn yo9u guys are just competing with each other for top weirdness honors K: the Nesty Awards -- K with a stunningly brilliant observation Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 July 2003 %% Vanyel: Lexington man kills himself at gas station after having two credit cards declined Cyrano: "Your gas pump is WITHOUT HONOR!" Vanyel: aheheh -- Cyrano going Klingon Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2003 %% K: I AM A MAN WHORE ARMY OF ONE -- K bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2003 %% K: when the best moment you have in a month is a girl telling you she's not pregnant K: yer having a shitty time -- K having a bad month Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2003 %% K: man i love my first drafted fantasy football team K: if this team were a woman, i'd stick my dick in it -- K with the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2003 %% Moni: heheh..I like my boss. she just walked into my office and threw chocolate at me -- Moni's boss, a likeable sort Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2003 %% Cyrano: maniacal laughter is bad, isn't it? firl: only if not used properly Cyrano: coming from my mother firl: then, no its bad. -- firl's advice to Cyrano Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2003 %% K: i like n iggers marcie: behold, k's contribution to diversity, peace and racial harmony. -- *sniff* that's beautiful, man Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2003 %% twinkie: we are the classy ppl around here twinkie: *belches* -- twinkie, the classy dame Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 July 2003 %% Moni: I have to stop thinking about wedding stuff. I just had a dream that Vicki didn't show up to the wedding, but I had the ceremony anyway and leo was the standin -- Moni overdoing it a bit Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2003 %% marcie: twinkie baby twinkie: hey marcie marcie fixes twinkie dinner, slowdances with her, plies her with expensive wine, and seduces her in strange and deviant ways twinkie: missed ya sweetcheeks marcie: i knew it -- marcie wooing twinkie Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 July 2003 %% Moni: gay men exaust me Cyrano: context, moni, context. -- Moni giving away her secrets Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 July 2003 %% tishy: blue pee, coffee-colored snot tishy: you're so colorful, leo -- tishy admiring vanyel's bodily fluids Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2003 %% Lia: ok, how's this for amusing Lia: I have to fill out a health form to send in with my paperwork for U of AZ Lia: can't finish it because I don't know my blood type Lia: I know my damn DNA profile but not my blood type Lia: go figure -- Lia reaching the pinnacle of geekdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2003 %% Courtney: I hate having taguen gone away Courtney: hate it! Courtney: I feel totally empty and devoid Courtney: it fucking sucks marcie dives into courtho's lap and does indecent and perverted things to her Courtney: oh Courtney: well then Courtney: taguen who? marcie: ahahaha Courtney: :D -- Courtney being all cheered up Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2003 %% tishy: The average ejaculate travels about 28 miles per hour, faster than the average city bus, which travels about 25 miles per hour tishy: get there faster, ride a sperm -- tishy the travel agent with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2003 %% Vanyel: i hope to one day be able to piss fractals tishy: can you piss famous works of art? tishy: the mona lisa? tishy: waterlillies? Vanyel: i can shit the mona lisa. tishy: stary starry night? Vanyel: ok this topic isnt much better. -- Vanyel trying to change the subject Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 July 2003 %% *** K has entered room 'Main' K: ugly fuckin whores. K: oh, i'm sorry, hi marcie: don't talk about your momma that way marcie: it's unchristian K: mama's a christian K: i'm talking about whores marcie: and the difference is...? lisa: don't talk about me like that tishy: what, you can't have a christian whore? lisa: i prefer slut rather than whore Al: christian whores. K: mmmm K: christian whores Al: rosary anal beads. K: fuck catholics Al: *shrug* Vanyel: i lov eyou guys -- loading up the bus to hell Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 July 2003 %% K humps lisa's leg lisa: down. K humps lisa lower lisa: oh yeah K: that the money spot baby lisa: wait K: no lisa: you missed it K: *jizz* K: oops Vanyel: rofl K: i'll get you a towel. marcie: was it good for you, lisa? lisa: almost -- lisa's fabulous sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 July 2003 %% K: with your 256kb penis Vanyel: and my 48mb hamster. Cyrano: well Cyrano: apply shannon's law CrOW: *shudder* Vanyel: *** Vanyel (Perpendicular Teeth): Cyrano: that's a pretty small hampster Vanyel: *** Logged in from 48mb-hamster.nurgle.net Cyrano: maybe a micron across? Vanyel: rofl Cyrano: at one bit of entropy per planc area Vanyel: it has to be small to fit in my 256k penis. CrOW: more bistro math K is crackin up CrOW: never adds up to anything Cyrano: so that's a 30-pin one? K: 9 pin penis Vanyel: just the one pin. K: one pin Cyrano: serial. K: beige wire marcie: parallel penis? Vanyel: i guess that would be better than a spiral one. K: rated at 2400bps Cyrano tries to make an awful pun involving bps and fails. marcie: fortunately, spiral penises are rare. marcie: or so i hear. Vanyel: ahahah Vanyel: oh fuck i think i pulled something laughing Vanyel: no it wasnt my penis marcie: :) -- calculating PenisMath Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 2003 %% K: lets have an orgy lisa: you're old CrOW: lets not K: sure? K: i hav ea twister board K: and some KY jelly lisa: ugh -- K entrancing the ladies Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 2003 %% K: some people say i have rabies K: i just think i hav ea digestion problem with saliva -- K continuing his seduction Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 2003 %% sunbeam: i have a 24 inch tall wookie saundo: now that's something to brag about! -- sunbeam bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 2003 %% marcie: i am the moral majority, motherfuckers. -- marcie ruling with an iron fist Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 2003 %% Vanyel: abka decky jeckyl vernouch stewitzes! -- Vanyel flailing Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 August 2003 %% china: This is the first concert I've ever been to where, if you bumped into someone, instead of them cussing your ass out, they invited you to have sex with them china: It was awesome -- china on Bob Dylan Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 August 2003 %% wob: yay for fuckin raises wob: i like looking at my check and seeing a bigger number wob: makes me sleep better on the job wob: h0h0h0h0 -- wob, the dedicated employee Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 August 2003 %% K: oprah's hot -- K's new love Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 August 2003 %% Vanyel: constipated Vanyel: this bodes well for the week -- Vanyel having a case of the Mondays Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 August 2003 %% Vanyel: rachel had a "hair emergency" Vanyel: and she had to run to wal-mart. Vanyel: god I love women sometimes -- Vanyel on his loving girlfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 August 2003 %% *** shited is now known as ed ed: sweet cuinhell: how was the shit? ed: a perfect 1/4 scale model of your head cuinhell: wow, how is your ass? ed: it will never be the same cuinhell: i bet -- CU with his head up someone *else's* ass Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 August 2003 %% firl: ok whatd I miss? I had to page soemthing. cuinhell: hardcore ed on leo action firl: damn! ed: what ed: ed on leo action, where? cuinhell: imagine a short hairy jew being accosted by a tall albino cuinhell: it's not pretty firl: ahahahah firl: thats a beautiful picture. cuinhell: like lurch humping a chimpanzee firl: stop that. the patrons are wondering whats so funny cuinhell: :) -- cuinhell amusing firl Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 August 2003 %% Vanyel: nothing says loving like a back wax -- ow. Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 August 2003 %% meg: SS meg: HOOOKR MOSKIES meg: AGHAHGA IGadget: what ever you took either take another or stop taking them ;) -- meg on the drugs Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 August 2003 %% Seeker: oh shit..my cyber gf is online and she is hot..i have to go -- the n00b trying to get laid Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2003 %% Manuka: marcie: while househunting today, we saw a sign that said something about "Profess onal painters" Manuka: i said it was all fun and games till someone loses an I marcie groans marcie smacks ian marcie: NO MORE Manuka: hey, andrea already smacked me for it marcie: it's my privilege as your ex-wife ;) Manuka: oh, ok Manuka: carry on then - Manuka being properly punished Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2003 %% marcie: i must prove my l33tness marcie: USE PCS INSTEAD OF SUNS YOU IDIOTS wob: heh heh heh marcie: LINUX IS KEWL!@#! marcie: okay now i can't think of anything else lame to say marcie: gimme a minute, i'm sure i'll come up with something -- marcie showing off Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2003 %% saundo: a cosmonaut got married today tishy: ahhh saundo: hsi wife was in houston, he was in the iSS Moni: awwwwww saundo: 240miles apart for the wedding tishy: yeah, i heard about that on the news the other day saundo: i bet the bachelor party sucked Al: rofl Moni: not much of a wedding night either saundo: hard to a) get a hooker on a soyuz supply ship, b) zero gravity lap dancing is just... pointless, and c) puking in zero G is just no fun tishy: now THAT would be interesting phone sex marcie: bahahaha saundo: "oh baybee *BEEEP* over" saundo: "oh baby *BEEEP* do it more... over" Al: *snorque* saundo: "over? over." saundo: "not over, IN.. over" -- sex! in! spaaaaace! Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2003 %% meg: yiddish back waxing parlor -- meg's dream job Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2003 %% janet: I know what I need as an object lesson janet: a luser encased in carbonite janet: on the wall across from my desk -- janet putting the smack down Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 August 2003 %% *** china has entered room 'Main' china: kill kill kill marcie: YEA marcie: BLOOD marcie: KILL marcie: MAIM marcie: DESTROY marcie: oh sorry marcie: i got carried away there cuinhell: the worms crawl in cuinhell: the worms crawl out cuinhell: the worms make lusers scream and shout china: the rats carry away Kenny janet: murder death kil -- the geeks having a really good day Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 August 2003 %% janet: maybe being a CIA operative *would* be less stressful -- janet on career choices Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 August 2003 %% *** janet has entered room 'Main' janet: cthulhu ate my router. -- janet discovering evil Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 August 2003 %% cuinhell: if i saw both olsen twins in the same room naked with me, my penis would fall off in shock. firl: ahahah marcie: ahahaha firl: this is what I come into chat for? -- firl being shocked Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 August 2003 %% marcie: hi saundo: hi marcie: wine marcie: it is my friend marcie: how i love it so marcie: oh ho marcie: a poem by marcie saundo: ahahahahah marcie bows marcie: thank you marcie: thank you -- marcie with an ode to the grape Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2003 %% Jake: if you were a real aussie you'd break a pool cue upside on of there heads Jake: and start a brawl saundo: no Jake: YES saundo: as I am a real aussie, that pool cue willhave been inserted into the CEO's arse Jake: and broken fosters bottles saundo: up their urethras Jake: and yahoo serious will be there Jake: no good aussie fight is complete without yahoo serious saundo: and he will be set on fire saundo: and we shall call him Yahoo of Arc saundo: because he was hearing voices in his hair marcie: and we all know how THAT goes, don't we -- saundo and his voices Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2003 %% Al: let's presume that I don't want to actually -kill- someone, just cut up, cook, and eat someone who's already dead. Am I doing something illegal here? saundo: i dunno.. how tasty are they? Al: I'll find a good recipe. I just want to know the legality janet: legality? janet: you can't own a dead body janet: a shame, really Al: 'own' marcafk: i love you people with all the blackness in my cold little lesbian heart janet: it's not considered property *** marcafk is now known as marcie Al: see janet: that's why necrophilia is a crime IGadget: whats the difference between own and have in this case? Al: I want to eat them not fuck them! janet: I can't believe I'm talking about this tishy: what if someone wills their body to you when they die, so you can eat them? Al: yes tishy that sort of thing tishy: would it be a crime then? Al: that's what I want to know janet: hm janet: maybe if you could make it part of a religious ritual... Al: supposing I'm driving down the road and happen upon someone who's just been killed in an accident. marcie: whip out the swiss army knife, the coleman stove, and go to work Al: can I cut off his leg and roast it? IGadget: you eat road kill? marcie: ahahha Al: well I want FRESH meat -- Al with a craving Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2003 %% janet: I'm a sysadmin and I have 3 kids. I no longer fear death. -- janet the courageous Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2003 %% marcie: "retry, reboot, reinstall" marcie: the three Rs of windows support marcie: ;) saundo: you forgot the 4th saundo: redhat -- saundo the engineer with a solution Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2003 %% saundo: trepanning, sport for the adventurous -- saundo on truly extreme sports Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2003 %% *** K has entered room 'Main' K: hewwo *** Raist has been disconnected K: 1 down, 18 to go *** K has been disconnected marcie: 2 down, 17 to go -- marcie knocking them off one at a time Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2003 %% Cyrano: damn router Cyrano: carry on my wayward sun Cyrano: there'll be packet loss when you are done -- janet singing a soothing little ditty Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 August 2003 %% Vanyel: you have no idea Vanyel: how much I hate my job Vanyel: you know how much I hate K? Vanyel: I like K more than my job marcie: oh god marcie: move NOW -- Vanyel getting career advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2003 %% Vanyel: the lenght of my ass plus the area of my asscheeks equals the fact that I have an ugly, hairy ass. -- Vanyel on his physical assets Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 August 2003 %% ed: billing wench has answered the phone. ed: doubtless she's trying to field a tech support call as only a seasoned crackhead can. -- ed's crack (heh) support staff Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 August 2003 %% Slayer: never underestimate a poor republican who feels slighted because his exalted leader is a fucking panty waist Slayer: i assumed that was going to make sense when i started it -- Slayer, no Al Franken Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 August 2003 %% Slayer: boys have a penis. girls have a vagina. marcie: very good firl: he forgets sometimes. Vanyel: ok Vanyel: i understand the penises and vaginas part Vanyel: so where do teh boobs come in? Slayer: usually between french kissing and fingering Vanyel: gotcha Vanyel: god now i'm all horny -- Vanyel needing some attention Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 August 2003 %% cuinhell throws a deat cat at firl firl: aww thanks. cuinhell: i picked one with extra maggots, just for you firl: you're the sweetest! Vanyel: aww fabby Vanyel: he liks you! firl: :) -- cuinhell bringing firl a gift Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 August 2003 %% Moni: oh wow..Charles Bronson died marcie: whoa Moni: he was 81 Slayer: i didn't do it! Moni: it's always the first one who protests -- Slayer, the accused Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 2003 %% Moni: no workie tomorrow marcie: no workie! saundo: well, at least not at $ORK saundo: must clean garage Moni: you husband type person you saundo: yes saundo: that's me twinkie: did you volunteer to do that? saundo: "volunteer" is such a subjective word twinkie: hahahaha -- saundo obeying She Who Must Be Obeyed Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 2003 %% janet: bless me, for I have sinned janet: I put rayon in a washing machine -- Janet repenting of crimes against fashion Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 September 2003 %% Vanyel: ever get to deal with sonicwall? Vanyel ducks the fourthcoming vomit wob: nope wob: dont know who/what that is Vanyel: imagine if AOL built a firewall Vanyel: thats what a sonicwall looks like wob: You've got packets! -- Vanyel with a security nightmare Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 September 2003 %% meg: rob made a funny but he can't spell it -- meg's highly educated husband Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 2003 %% Vanyel: bacon is one of like 4 foods that youc an safely microwave Vanyel: the other 3 are microwave popcorn -- Vanyel, Iron Chef Kosher Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 2003 %% Slayer: the very existance of tofu is evidence of the world's impending end -- Slayer, Iron Chef Protein Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 2003 %% sunbeam: there are no good planets in our solar system sunbeam: maybe a couple of good moons Vanyel: What, europa? sunbeam: but they're butt-ass cold Vanyel: well I just got a new jacket -- sunners planning her next vacation Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 2003 %% Vanyel: right on top of you, moni Moni: noi wonder it felt big Vanyel: it felt pretty large here -- Vanyel and Moni sharing a special moment Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 September 2003 %% Moni: heh..cat just puked Moni: mom calling -- Moni's cat, allergic to mothers Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 September 2003 %% *** china has entered room 'Main' china: werd marcie leaps on china china: woop! marcie wiggles marcie: hey baby :) Vanyel: oh wow Vanyel: this might rule -- Vanyel getting geared up for the show Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 September 2003 %% cuinhell: goddamn, i can't remember what movie it is cuinhell: but it was about a group of criminals cuinhell: and one wouldn't work with another because he ate shit in prison cuinhell: and to freak the dude out the shit eater said "it's spongy cuinhell: so, now I can't eat twinkies anymore I think. -- cuinhell's sensitive side Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 September 2003 %% meg: it's not called short attention span anymore meg: it's called porn attention span -- meg contributing to the world of medicine Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 September 2003 %% IGadget: damnit stop I cant breathe Im laughing too hard cuinhell: QUICK! cuinhell: now's our chance to finish him! cuinhell: everybody BE FUNNY -- cuinhell with an evil plan Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 September 2003 %% sunbeam: do girls have colons? -- sunbeam wondering why girls don't fart Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 2003 %% Moni: although..some lesbains I know have penis fantasites Moni: but..that's another story wob: thats because they all need some serious deep dicking! Moni: no..it's because they ahven't had sex wiht me yet -- Moni bragging on her prowess Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 2003 %% Vanyel: i'd kill a cat and skin it with a spoon for some winter. -- Vanyel craving a change of season Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 September 2003 %% Vanyel: Yet another difference between Jewel and The Who: Jewel cancels tour due to death of bass player wob: that's because she has to now write an album about it -- wob loves Jewel Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 September 2003 %% janet: ok janet: important lesson of the day janet: mascara, *then* pot. -- janet learning the basics Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 September 2003 %% Al: damn, just blew a disk Vanyel: i'm not going to ask. Vanyel: i'm just going to walk away IGadget: did it chaffe? Al: no, it rattled and spun down -- Al, that pervert Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2003 %% janet: I dreamt about intergalactic space travel. and messed up network patch panels. janet: some guy was plugging a Dustbuster into a PoE jack -- janet with strange dreams Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 September 2003 %% Moni: HELLO MR FUCK WHO HAS DECIDED TO REMOTELY CONTROL MY COMPUTER WITHOUT TELLING ME. -- Moni having it out with her network admin Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 September 2003 %% cuinhell: HOOKERS AND BLOW janet: and shoes. cuinhell: that's some thrift store you go to! -- janet finding all the good deals Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2003 %% saundo: it appears johnny cash has been resurrected in the form of buffalo wings saundo: as I am suffering from ye olde burning ring of fire -- boooo! Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2003 %% saundo: damn saundo: i missed "the mullets" on tnn -- saundo's favorite show Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2003 %% saundo: precision guided mullets -- saundo's new weapon Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2003 %% china: oy china: one of the two brain cells I woke up with this morning died at some point during the morning hours china: I'm hoping that the last one will split overnight -- China having mental problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 September 2003 %% janet: I tell you janet: esr, djb and stallman. in thunderdome. janet: I'd pay big Vanyel: YES -- Janet with a great idea for Pay-Per-View Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 September 2003 %% Vanyel: i'm walking on the thin line between hate and inpaling people with a plastic water bottle -- Vanyel twitching Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 September 2003 %% Vanyel gigaburps -- Vanyel developing new skills Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 September 2003 %% Vanyel: what are your lusers up to, janet janet: I have to find a technical solution to a human problem janet: namely, my users are psychopathic cuntheads -- janet with work problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 September 2003 %% megafk: norf winds bwoah megafk: souf winds bwoah megafk: huwwicanes megafk: urfquakes megafk: KILL DA WABBIT Lia: hehehe janet defudds meg megafk: that tickles janet: it's the hat janet: now I'm hearing freddy mercury singing "bweak fwee" in a fudd accent. marcie: don't MAKE me come over there. -- janet flirting with meg Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 September 2003 %% K: what the hell is flotsam K: can't say i'v eherad that word Vanyel: its like jetsam Vanyel: only it comes first. Slayer: jetsam is the stuff they throw overboard to lighten the load Slayer: flotsam is the stuff that's driving after a ship goes down K: hahahahaha -- Slayer typoing Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 September 2003 %% cuinhell: i'm going to apply for Big Brother 5. cuinhell: i want nothing more than to be reviled worldwide -- cuinhell following his dreams Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 2003 %% Courtney: american pie is not american Courtney: err Courtney: apple pie Courtney: is not american meg: bye bye miss canadian pie Courtney: its not even canadian Courtney: but it sure is yummy Courtney: hahahahahaha meg: drove my dogsled to the toolshed meg: but the toolshed was ... uh firl: why can't it be as american as chocolate cake? janet: as american as Jerusalem artichokes. janet: that works. meg: as american as jazz goddammit firl: as american as being a DICK meg: dick frightens me! firl: mmm dick meg: i said jazz, firlie meg: not jizz firl: doh firl: :) -- meg sings! Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 2003 %% marcie: woo hoo, thin client worky marcie: yay marcie: slow as three monkeys having sex in a barrel of molasses, but it works Slayer: don't give me ideas -- Slay trying to outdo himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 2003 %% cuinhell: WEINER TINGLE -- cuinhell getting all excited Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 2003 %% *** sunbeam has entered room 'Main' sunbeam: the snails in my computer are getting old -- sunbeam needing an upgrade Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 September 2003 %% Vanyel: goddamn motherfuck. Vanyel: I am so fucking horny Vanyel: I must go shower. Vanyel: hows THAt for a hikau -- Vanyel reciting poetry Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 September 2003 %% Vanyel: when did muddy waters die? Vanyel: Muddy Waters died in Chicago, April 30, 1984. meg: i will use google before asking dumb questions meg: i will use google before asking dumb questions meg: i will use google before asking dumb questions meg: i will use google before asking dumb questions Vanyel: my first google search didnt find anything Vanyel: I rpobably spelled somethign wrong Vanyel: see? -- Vanyel demonstrating his vanyelitis Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 2003 %% Vanyel: oh wob, did you get a dummy light come on? wob: yes i did wob: "check engine" wob: i read the POS manual and all it says is that its for oil pressure wob: well i checked that completely and there's no problems there wob: so i ignored it wob: it's been on maybe a week now wob: if that Slayer: try washing it Vanyel: ahahah -- Slay helping wob solve his car problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 September 2003 %% IGadget: kids are like anyother pet execpt they can talk back later -- IGadget on offspring Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 2003 %% wob: lets do the ho chi mink two step. wob: with minks. saundo: yes IGadget: furry saundo: strap a mink to the crotch of your black pajamas saundo: and blow something up saundo: rinse, lather, repeat, wait for fall of Saigon IGadget: um no thanks saundo: that's the ho chi mink two step! wob: with rice wob: don't forget the rice. saundo: yes saundo: the C4 high explosive rice wob: everythings better with rice on the ho chi mink wob: yes saundo: with boobytrapped shrimp wob: mixed with some dead rat Crazy: can't have a Laos two-step without the rice paddies wob: mmm ratmeat marcie: i'll have some rice without so much dead rat in it -- the new EN dance Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 2003 %% cuinhell: ah, here is a tshirt i need cuinhell: "I'm the teenage girl you jerked off in the chatroom with" -- the horror! THE HORROR! Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 2003 %% cuinhell: A Louisiana jury found C-Murder guilty of second-degree murder on Tuesday cuinhell: he should have picked a less conspicuous name. -- cuinhell with the news update Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2003 %% IG_drugs: bad pun time.. I just stepped in a bowl of ramen, is that chicken soup for the sole? Slayer: you're not allowed to type IG_drugs: bwahahaha -- IGadget entertaining himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2003 %% janet: Licensed technology acupuncturist -- janet with a new title for a business card Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 October 2003 %% ed: fullll ed: bladdder ed: fullll ed: bladder ed: beaches and waterfalls Vanyel: imagine K is on fire Vanyel: if you piss, it'll put the fire out ed: yes ed: I was just gonna say -- Vanyel with creative visualization Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 October 2003 %% saundo: how is it that the hulk's purple pants stay on? Vanyel: oh Vanyel: morality i guess -- saundo with a question on comics Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 October 2003 %% ed: you can lead a dumbshit to water, but you can't make him drown himself -- the wisdom of ed Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2003 %% meg: fuck your ball sweat, your balls dont weigh 4 lbs each -- meg with a point about summertime discomfort Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2003 %% sunbeam: perkiness has a price -- sunbeam on why bras are necessary Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2003 %% china: I usually base my costume on whatever my hair is doing that year anyways -- china on Halloween Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2003 %% firl: i dub this woman annoyinngmicrofilmluzer -- firl on a "patron" at her library job Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2003 %% Al: the most productive thing I have done today...is urinate. -- Al being a productive citizen Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2003 %% Sarge: marcie you still work at a uni right? marcie: actuallky no Sarge: oh marcie: got laid off from therein july marcie: working at national semiconductor now Sarge: ok, maybe I need to log-in a bit more often.. marcie: heheh cuinhell: wob and meg got married too Sarge: shit! Sarge: when the hell did that happen? marcie: heheh marcie: oh, and sarge? marcie: moni is gay cuinhell: OMG! marcie: ahahahah Slayer: and sarge is a moron and the world turns Vanyel: narf Sarge: yeah yeah.. -- Sarge catching up Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2003 %% sunbeam: ugh i have caught a cold sunbeam: and i'm going to the punkin patch today sunbeam: i need a stunt double today sunbeam: *sneeze* -- sunbeam with needs Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 2003 %% Vanyel: http://www.jewfaq.org/sex.htm janet: more fun that retention catheter. Vanyel: "Kosher sex" marcie: Soney: is semen kosher? janet: only if gathered during ritual slaughter. -- janet with the answer to Soney's question Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2003 %% Vanyel: thank god girls don't give http status codes in bed. -- Vanyel not wanting *that* many updates Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2003 %% Lia: new test question, tell me what you think Lia: What is a catalyst? Lia: A) A substance added to a reaction mix that helps the reaction, and is incorporated into the products Lia: B) A substance added to a reaction mix that hinders the reaction, but is not incorporated into the product Lia: C) A substance added to a reaction mix that helps the reaction, but is not incorporated into the product Lia: D) Holstein, Guernsey, Angus janet: E) a feline missing two legs on one side. Lia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA -- lia and janet competing for Bad Pun Queen Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2003 %% Kestrel: HOLY MOLEY! Kestrel: I MUST GO LUBRICATE MY MEAT! janet: rofl Kestrel: later kids -- Kestrel with an urgent task Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2003 %% Lia: If you have a fire in lab, don't try to be a hero, stand back and admire your work -- Lia with chem lab safety tips Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2003 %% janet: a teflon coated miniskirt is not appropriate apparel for handling strong acids. -- janet with more lab safety tips Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2003 %% china: I got conned into taking the minutes at the dean's meeting today china: I don't know how china: I've been hanging out with the dean too much china: But, I did get to show off my Mad Copier Skillz today by fixing the copier with a letter opener and a pair of tweezers Vanyel: you needed tweezers? -- Vanyel demanding perfection Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 2003 %% janet: ironically janet: gary coleman has more political experience janet: and did not star in a movie where he was impregnated by danny devito -- Janet on Ahhnold Schwarzenegger Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 October 2003 %% janet: be postmodern janet: frame a piece of shag carpet. -- janet with decorating tips Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 October 2003 %% sunbeam: this day is sucky i think i need new shoes -- sunbeam performing retail therapy Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 October 2003 %% Vanyel: I just realised something Vanyel: my voicemail password, along with the command to play new messages sounds like that famous bit from the 1812 oveture wob: van wob: you need to go home wob: ;) -- wob advising Vanyel to take a break already Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 October 2003 %% Moni: For your entertainment, I am now going to remove my own uterus -- Moni having cramps Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2003 %% janet: and anyone who sexually harasses me will wind up losing his balls before I do. -- janet puts her delicate, feminine foot down Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 October 2003 %% cuinhell: i reboot, therefore I am. *** cuinhell has been disconnected -- cuinhell the philosopher Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2003 %% Slayer: where's all these hottie pictures i missed Vanyel: www.ratemypoo.com -- Vanyel helping Slayer out Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2003 %% firl: also i have new healthcare and the only doctor accepting new patients was born according to this website in fucking 1911 firl: I don't think I wanna go see him -- firl having headaches Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 October 2003 %% ed: OH MY GOD ed: the rhesus reaper has come for me! ed: he's wielding a nasty looking seal club ed: and he's got a holder mounted tube of KY Jake: hahaha janet: ed janet: either up the dosage or lower it ed: HE'S HITTING ME WITH THE SEAL CLUB ed aggh aggggh aaaaghhh *grunt* unng Unggga unng *aagh* *grunt* ed: gah ed: I just got him in the kneecaps with a DN3000 ed: he's wounded ed: he's crawling towards me with the KY ed: I just dropped the 3phased chandolier on him ed: he smells like biscuits and gravy ed: mmmm marcie: i'd love to live in your world, ed -- ed twitching Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 October 2003 %% sunbeam: he's just a perfect little man janet: he stays quiet and does what he's told? Marianne: heh sunbeam: he's not really quiet sunbeam: he babbles all day in some strange baby dialect Slayer: this is your boyfriend? sunbeam: shaddup -- sunbeam on her perfect baby Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 October 2003 %% megafk: either it's mass allergy season or it's thrax -- meg, sneezy and doomed Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2003 %% ed: moving ed: tasty ed: drinking your own beer on your own porch ed: nothing like it ed: especially while you watch termites eat off the railing and your water heater belch and spew 50 gallons of rusty hot water all over your nice white carpet. -- ed having problems with his new house Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 October 2003 %% janet: need to strengthen my hands, couldn't open an olive jar Slayer: yo're a woman now. get used to not being able to do things men can do. janet: so, I should just throw it at your head to open it then? marcie: bahahahahahahahahahaahah -- janet getting liberated Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2003 %% janet overclocks a lemon -- janet getting overenthusiastic Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2003 %% Vanyel: the only empathy I have is for my other personalities. -- Vanyel on the higher emotions Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2003 %% janet: a tiny little 10 kiloton suitcase nuke, that's all I ask -- janet not asking for much, really Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 October 2003 %% sunbeam: jeez my mom is chatty today sunbeam: she must've had coffee and antidepressants for breakfast -- sunbeams bonding with her mother Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2003 %% IGadget ponders hari kari Al: the paperwork's a bitch, dood -- Al with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2003 %% Vanyel attacks janet with a chinese fighting muffin janet fends it off with a pair of chopsticks and a bundt pan -- food fight! Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2003 %% Vanyel: goddamnit i'd eat a ground beef cat (with fur) for a good massage right now -- Vanyel, tense Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2003 %% Vanyel: has LA burned down yet? marcie: no. Vanyel: dammit -- Vanyel checking on the state of things Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2003 %% meg: fuck you fuckers chinatch: This is the only place in the world where "fuck you fuckers" is a complimentary greeting. meg: hehe marcie: ain't it great? Al: damn skippy chinatch: yessirree -- china sharing the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2003 %% janet hums her mantra janet: *i am an island of serenity in a sea of lusers* -- janet meditating Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2003 %% janet: hey leo janet: did you say you've got 10.3? Vanyel: yeah I do janet: have it anywhere near a fast connection, or are we talking 128k? janet: still have not gotten our media here janet: and I'm jonesing to get this G4 set up Vanyel: heh Vanyel: luckelly, I have the disk images here Vanyel: actaully Vanyel: is ed here? Vanyel: he might be able to get 'em somewhere good w/ bandwidth janet: nye znayu Vanyel: otherwise, I can get 'em up somewhere janet: I can suck gently janet: wait a minute, that didn't come out right Vanyel: ahahaha Xi: hehehehe marcie: ahahahahahahahaha janet: you all have very dirty minds. janet hmphs. -- janet, shocked Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 October 2003 %% Moni: mmm..death, dismemberment, destruction Moni: yes Moni: it's a perfect Monday -- Moni having a good day Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 November 2003 %% firl: im allergic to vowels. -- firl's personal problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 November 2003 %% Zorro: bluegrass scares satan -- Z on music Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 November 2003 %% ed: I can't believe nobody makes an 802.11 thermostat -- ed trying for the ultimate in nerdiness Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2003 %% devil: who wants to see me in scuba gear? Slayer: that would roughly be me devil: don't be rough now Slayer: but i thought... Vanyel: goddamnit if I throw up i'm gonna be pissed devil: men always do think that -- devil the seductress Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2003 %% xi: saranwrap, for those really hard to contain murder. -- Xi with a product endorsement Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2003 %% janet: I'm developing a bit of fondness for cooking. it's like o-chem but without as many explosions -- janet discovering new hobbies Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2003 %% janet fries up some green tomatoes marcie: mmm marcie: fried green tomatoes good janet: I put lots of paprika on them xi: fried in the blood of the infidels -- Xi having issues Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 November 2003 %% Vanyel: being bitter keeps me from killing stray cats -- Vanyel doing personal therapy Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2003 %% cuinhell: man, i gotta study my ass off before wednesday ;) Vanyel: what aer yu studying Vanyel: spelling I hope -- Vanyel quizzing (har) cuinhell Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2003 %% Vanyel: i really do need to relax Vanyel: that bitch with 2gb of mail came in to complain her mail was slow Vanyel: and i went off onher marcie: bahahahaha marcie: awesome marcie: she deserved it meg: did you tell her she could lick your salty matzo balls marcie: PUT EM IN YOUR MOUTH Vanyel: I told her that a computer with 128mb of ram will slow down when it has to deal with a 2gb mailbox. marcie: i bet she's too much of an imbecile to comprehend that Vanyel: god Vanyel: the advection of stupidity into this office is becoming unberable Moni: tea bag her Moni: my balls are the 2gb of mail and your mouth is the 128 mg of ram Moni: SEE.it doesn't fit real well Vanyel: ahahahaha Vanyel: AHAHAHAHAHAHAH -- Moni letting a little rage & hate flow Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2003 %% ed: HADDMIT ed: I COULD REPLACE YOU WITH A SEMI COMPLICATED PERL SCRIPT BACKENDED BY SOME C EXE'S WRITTEN BY 60 SEX STARVED COCAINE FILLED MONKEYS cuinhell: dammit, ed...when i'm a walmart greeter you'll not even get a cart! cuinhell: NOP BASKET EITHER! cuinhell: -P Jake: hahahah Vanyel: ahahahah -- ed and cuinhell having a slapfight Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2003 %% ed: wonder what the breaking point is for an ass ed: I mean.. Vanyel: ask K ed: you'd think this would be an oft discussed problem ed: the breaking of the anus ed: the spewing forth of the shit, whenever it wishes. china: I dunno, but I know I've passed a couple of big 'uns in my time ed: yea Vanyel: rofl Vanyel: chrsit Vanyel: i'm laughing too hard ed: but imagine how unbig they'd be without proper control? ed: I mean ed: a turd is like a staactite ed: only it grows in a confined space ed: like a baby lion cub ed: to grow and wreak havoak upon the plumbing systems of this earth ed: now ed: life with out a satisfying morning dump..would be horific ed: I cannot even imagine. china: Actually, it's the large intestine that keeps it tucked away, so technically, even if your ass is all loose, you could still pass a big 'un ed: choosing to destroy my asses ability to provide flora and fauna for the sewer systems of the world..unthinkable. ed: soemtimes, though, they get extra big when you can't release 'em right off ed: eg: aborted shit window ed: it rides on the edge of your shorts, and your colon, growing in strength, like a tsunami picking up steam out in the pacific. china: Just think, ed. You could pass great sculptures of the Western World cuinhell: and feels like it's tearing your ass 5 sizes larger ed: what, how eos that work, like reading my future from a calfs liver? ed: passing as hit with the entire lost scrolls, in tact? china: hmmm. Suddenly, this salisbury steak doesn't look so appetizing anymore... cuinhell: hahahaha marcie: rofl ed: the sauce is what kills it. -- ed pontificating on his favorite subject Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 November 2003 %% wob: GIVE ME COQ OF FREEDOM!@# -- wob has a dream! Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 November 2003 %% Vanyel: only agree to an alcohol test if you havnt been drinking Vanyel: and only agree if the officer involved isnt trying to pass off his penis as a breathalyzer -- Vanyel with legal advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 November 2003 %% Vanyel: i'm not stupid Vanyel: i'm big boned -- Vanyel chanting affirmations Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 November 2003 %% marcie shimmies at kes Kestrel: interesting marcie: hey :P -- Kestrel not paying sufficient attention Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 November 2003 %% china: I'm really becoming an intolerant, defensive, irritable person. china: And I don't like it janet: awesome janet: come work on our helpdesk marcie: hahaHAHAHAHAHAHA -- janet staunchly defending her colleagues Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 November 2003 %% janet: some bastard just walking by in the hallway janet: whistling fucking EDELWEISS. marcie: ahahaha marcie: how cheery! janet slams her head against her desk to try to knock it out marcie: how chipper! marcie: how incredibly stuck-in-your-head-until-the-end-of-time anoying! janet: careful or I'll summon the spirit of Dexy. janet: actually, I've had The Replacements stuck in my head recently marcie: ooh marcie: you bitch Courtney: just how far down do you wanna go Courtney: oh we could talk it out over a cup of joe marcie: i'm keeping "it's a small world" in reserve, don't forget. Courtney: and you would look deep into my eyes like I was a supermodel Courtney: uhuh janet: when cameron was in egypt's land... Courtney: hahahaha marcie: hahahah Courtney: don't let my cameron gooooooooooo janet grins Courtney: bueller? Courtney: bueller? janet: I warn you janet: I'm holding back Yellow Submarine for mutually assured destruction marcie: don't worry, i've got "I Will Always Loooooooove Youuuuuuuu" marcie cackles quietly janet: like the talking heads much? marcie peers suspiciously at janet marcie: i don't trust you. marcie: you dexy fan, you. -- janet and marcie having a slapfight Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 November 2003 %% wob: ALMOST wob: TIME wob: TO wob: GO wob: HOME Slayer: you'll never leave. time will come and then reverse itself. you will be caught in a loop forever, repeating the same mindless tasks you were forced to perform last night. Slayer: i mean hi -- Slayer channeling Satan Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 November 2003 %% Vanyel: if I ever have a wedding, I want a human sacrifice at mine. -- Vanyel planning his wedding Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 November 2003 %% janet: 10^17 neutrons per second, that's all I need janet: and I could have enough plutonium by xmas 2004 marcie: i do *not* want to know what you're planning. janet: the gift that keeps on giving marcie: nuclear holocaust? :P janet: oh psh janet: just a little teeny one -- janet planning a party Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 November 2003 %% janet: it's not wise to taunt a girl who once aspired to going into explosive demolitions. -- janet with sage advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 November 2003 %% cuinhell: my bowels are great cuinhell: the rest of me is irritated -- cuinhell on the state of his health Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 November 2003 %% Lia: FUCK! Lia: low of 35 tomorrow Al: FUCK! Al: I need to buy some diskettes Lia: FUCK! Lia: I hate p-chem Al: FUCK! I'm working tmrw, Sunday, AND Friday. Vanyel: FUCK Vanyel: my sweater has a hole in it. -- the crew complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 November 2003 %% Moni: of course, I'm sacrificing myself by having beer tonight since there was only room in the fridge for 5 bottles Al: way to take one for the team Moni: least I could do -- Moni valiantly shopping for groceries Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 November 2003 %% janet: I just hacked up *another* lung janet: I think this makes 4 so far, which is obviously puzzling -- janet fighting off the flu Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 2003 %% sunbeam: i wish i knew what to tell this unemployment person so that they'd give it to me even though i quit my last job meg: hope it's a dude, wear a short skirt and tight top and take isaac in to nurse during the interview meg: ewwww meg: it might work meg: bat your lasshes all girlylike meg: say you quit the last job because they were discriminating against you for being beautiful janet: crack some gum meg: and you need state money so you can keep outfitting yourself in tight tops because isaac barfs up on all your good ones sunbeam: it's a phone interview janet: damn meg: well then my plan is shot -- meg's best-laid plans Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 December 2003 %% china: ya know, this bloody democracy is a pain in my ass china: I went all over this town looking for a crown, and I could not find a single one -- china looking for her due as a Queen Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2003 %% Vanyel: this one time Vanyel: and band camp Vanyel: I killed my whole troop marcie: i stuck a flute in leo's pussy china: wait -- china, confused Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2003 %% wob: DRUGS ARE NOT ONLY FOR ANIMALS TO ENJOY wob: GODDAMNIT -- wob with a lesson Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2003 %% Kestrel: I would not spank the ass of enlightenment -- Kestrel learning wisdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2003 %% Kestrel: I am on a roll and I lag Kestrel: SATAN lags me -- Kestrel casting out the deeeeemons Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2003 %% janet: woke up to the room spinning and I thought, "damn, why am I hung over 7 hours after taking cough syrup" janet: and realized that someone had filled my sinuses with lime jello -- janet's further adventures with the flu Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 2003 %% janet: how much phlegm would errol flynn fling if errol flynn could fling phlegm? janet: ok, I'll lay off the cough syrup -- janet and the flu, round 3 Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 2003 %% Moni: lately, my words of wisdom have tended to be "DIE YOU FUCKHEADS JUST DIE DAMMIT" Moni: i'm trying to be a smidge more positive -- Moni having a bad week Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2003 %% janet: you are in a maze of small twisty badly written PDFs, all different. -- janet dealing with NFS and OS X Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2003 %% Moni: heh..therapist in the hallway talking with an adolescent patient. "Hi, what's up?" Patient "No" Therapist...silence Moni: working here is just hilarious somtimes -- Moni loving her job Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2003 %% ed: I feel the rage. wob: feel the hate flow through you ed: oh, wait, the rage I felt was this huge grogan ed: I swear its pressing on one of my lungs -- the status of ed's bowels Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2003 %% zag: i dreamt the other night that i didn't have a head zag: it was actually quite refreshing -- zag having weird dreams Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2003 %% xi: testicular vaporization, next on Geraldo. -- Xi with an idea for a new show Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2003 %% Vanyel: shitters faux pas #983245670392453-a wob: did it all come out alright Vanyel: you put the paper protector down on the seat Vanyel: cuz you know everyone in this office building is dirty fucks Vanyel: you do your shitting Vanyel: you stand up, and the paper protector sticks to your ass marcie: C|N>K Vanyel: along with that bit of it that sticks into the bowl wob: perhaps you shouldnt smear shit all over it beforehand marcie: ewwwww Vanyel: yeah. Vanyel: luckelly I was supervising the extraction wob: hehe meg: can we have more details please meg: that wasn't quite gross enough sunbeam: this is the perfect example of an unchallenged intellect -- sunbeam accusing Vanyel of being bored Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 December 2003 %% ed: hrm. ed: Am5x86 CPU P75 AT 133MHZ ed: thats a screamer Xi: if you're referrign to the sound it makes when you drop it from the 100th story then yeah, a screamer -- Xi the PC guy Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 December 2003 %% IGadget: ebay is a den of inequity and should perrish in the fires of hell....but only because I wish I had thought the idea up. -- IGadget damning his luck Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2003 %% devil: people don't work in vet medicine for money devil: they do it for love of animals devil: and masochism -- devil on her chosen profession Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2003 %% ed: ALL HAIL THE MANGLED VISAGE OF MICHAEL JACKSON -- ed's new personal hero Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 December 2003 %% janet: I... janet: I never wanted to do this for a living... janet: I always wanted to be... Vanyel: a chartered accountant? janet: ew -- Vanyel ruining janet's groove Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 December 2003 %% china: If my penis gets any larger with the products from these spam emails I keep receiving, I'll enter the Guinness Book of World Records. -- china's personal problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 December 2003 %% IGadget: you must dance arround the computer widdershins 3 times backwards to resolve computer problems marcie: yes marcie: and sacrifice a virgin chicken at midnight on the full moon IGadget: how do you find a virgin chicken? they have all been laid. -- IGadget making his yearly funny Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 December 2003 %% Vanyel: okay Vanyel: I get a bitchy email from salesfuck about how he cant open a .zip in an attachemnt... Vanyel: ...from a spammer. -- Vanyel, who doesn't allow zip files Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 December 2003 %% devil: i can honestly say that i would rather be beaten than ever go christmas shopping again -- devil getting into the festivities Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 December 2003 %% janet: sunny sunbeam: hi jan janet: I discovered the cure for depression sunbeam: what's that? janet: I think it revolves around lipstick and shopping -- janet discovering the secret Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 December 2003 %% sunbeam: i want a nap for christmas -- sunny's dearest wish Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 December 2003 %% ed: tonight I shall have the new machine up with iSight ed: marcie you may netsex me with your iSight. marcie: ed, i shall. ed: wear your sequined dyke-garb, would you? Xi: ed's rebroadcasting that out to the rest of us so you'll also need a tube of Crest, 14 eggs, a 12-pack of Walmart bags, and one Santa-type hat marcie: naturally ed: and 2 goats marcie: and a lesbian in a pear treeee ed: I got some elbonians paying big money for the goats marcie takes notes marcie: that'll be $39.95 for the first 3 minutes and $12.95 per minute after marcie: we accept visa, mastercard or amex Xi: and you get extra credit for a snake charmer dildo marcie: moni will take your money at the door... just slide the card through her slot Xi: does the 39.95 include the goats? marcie: of course! ed: but it doesn't included the frozen chimpanzee's marcie: well, those are more expensive cause of shipping and stuff marcie: *you* try gettinga dozen frozen chimps this close to christmas Xi: especially freshly frozen Xi: nobody wants year old frozen chimps -- marcie starting a new business Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 December 2003 %% ed: when you can lite your urine with a zippo, you need to slow down -- ed on drinking Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 December 2003 %% Xi: african cave dwelling spiders Xi: this is the only reason to watch fear factor -- Xi glued to the TV Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 December 2003 %% ed jackhammers wob wob: now that's the fucking christmans spirit -- merry xmas! Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2003 %% janet: sysadminning doesn't have enough activities involving sharp blades for my tastes -- janet needing a career change Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2003 %% IGadget: I had a bad thing happen today, I was hanging upside down under my dash when I farted twinkie: ew IGadget: yeah I saved myself by turning on the heat blower -- IGadget's adventures in his van Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 December 2003 %% saundo: "well it's a one for the chutpah, two for the schmoe, three for the menorah, now go wedding go!": saundo ahemas marcie: ahahahaha saundo: excuse me -- saundo cheering on Moni's wedding Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 December 2003 %% marcie: oh btw marcie gives janet a tacnuke marcie: merry xmas! marcie: Cyrano: I want a tacnuke for next xmas janet: wooooo! janet: I will treasure it always janet: at least, until the next staff meeting -- janet making plans for work Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 December 2003 %% Moni: this has just been a banner day for me saundo: awww, poor moni Moni: I just changed my voice mail message to my Hi..I'm out of the office now saundo: can we help? Moni: and just as I finshed, I dropped my tea and said "Aww Fuck" Moni: then hung up marcie: ahahahahahahhaa saundo: ahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA marcie: YES! saundo: you rule! Moni: I'm so tempted to leave it -- Moni getting into the holiday spirit Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 December 2003 %% devil: oh, pissed duck janet: sounds like an item not to order at a chinese restaurant -- janet with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 December 2003 %% wob: ahhh there's nothing like a good xmas poo -- wob making a gift Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 December 2003 %% sunbeam: i need somebody sunbeam: i'm desperate sunbeam: i'd take a high school kid right now even -- sunbeam needing... a babysitter Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2003 %% sunbeam: i had a hot dog for lunch sunbeam: it gave me heartburn sunbeam: it hurts saundo: you may have to amputate -- saundo with medical advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2003 %% linzee: how was everyones x-mas and such cuinhell: what? cuinhell: i fucking missed xmas? cuinhell: SHIT! linzee: again? cuinhell: curse these online games! -- cuinhell coming up for air Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2003 %% devil: i love being sick devil: it gives me a reason to be a bitch -- devil, sweet & innocent Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 December 2003 %% Xi: its nearly as exciting as cutting off your own leg with a rubber spatula -- Xi on trouble ticket training Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 December 2003 %% cuinhell: the thought if DK dancing is as funny as the second coming -- cuinhell's sense of humor Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2004 %% Vanyel: hangover finally gone ed: noting will ever erase the debauchery, though, leo Vanyel: damnitg -- ed being leo's conscience Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 January 2004 %% dweez: i'd like to fuck chirs farley -- dweez with a new year's wish Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2004 %% Moni: patient in my office "I'm hearing voices that are telling me to kill you." Vanyel: lovely. marcie: lovely marcie: start carrying a gun :P Moni: hmmm....can we say 5150 time? Xi: mandatory thorzine for all patients entering the office Vanyel: "go ahead and try, I could use the insruance settlement when they fire me." Moni: I called our 98 year old security guard with one leg marcie: ahahahaha Vanyel: rofl Moni: heh Leo wob: hahaha marcie: don't you feel safer now! Xi: as long as the fake leg comes off he doesn't have to carry a club Moni: I feel sooooo much better now -- Moni being reassured Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2004 %% dweez: you know when you go to wipe your ass, and a VW falls out? I hate it when that happens... -- dweez having ass problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2004 %% Vanyel: ed's gnome ass grows a fur coat when its cold out saundo: ahahaha saundo: we shall call him dildo baggins ed: fuck that Vanyel: ROFL -- ed the gnome Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2004 %% saundo: ipods are jobs' way of getting his penis into many people's hands -- saundo on Steve Jobs Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2004 %% devil: i most assuredly have pathetically low self-seteesm, depression, agoraphobia, eating disorder, pathtetic motivaion, and a desire to be so busy that i can't think Moni: mmm..you sound like a money maker for me Moni: let's schedule an appointment -- Monika getting some on the side Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 January 2004 %% Vanyel: i'm sure i'm violating the laws of physics in my apartment -- Vanyel on his electrical outlets Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 January 2004 %% janet: atlatl lawndarts janet: now that would be fun -- janet with a new Olympic sport Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 January 2004 %% Moni: erg..walking down hallway with patient and one of my labia rings suddenly decided to twist in the wrong way Moni: ever tried to just look normal and walk normal when your genetalia suddenly gets tied in knots? -- Moni in pain Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 January 2004 %% sunbeam: i'm a big crybaby right now though because of my pyramid Vanyel: your pyramid? sunbeam: you know Vanyel: apparently i don't meg: her bloody gash sunbeam: oh for fucks sake meg -- sunbeam trying to be subtle, and failing Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 January 2004 %% Beastie: the colts are still gonna win lisa: bite your tongue Beastie: screw the chiefs lisa: um lisa: you're not nice -- lisa's scathing repartee Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2004 %% jairus: anyone know what's up with Auggie? Vanyel: i just hafta remember to plug it back in Vanyel: i unplugged it so I could vaccum in there Vanyel: ill plug it back in once i get home jairus: hehe jairus: seriously? Vanyel: yeah jairus: that's like, a week ago - congrats on having a worse memory than me (and that's an achievement) janet: ahahah janet: ok, that's classic -- Vanyel showing concern for Auggie's fate Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2004 %% Vanyel: telnet is the devil's protocol janet: and if telnet is the devil's, then whose is ftp? Cthulhu's? Vanyel: ftp is cleartext passage to the devil's anus. -- protocol discussions Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2004 %% sunbeam: isaac is raging against the nap machine -- sunbeam reporting on her baby Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2004 %% Courtney: http://web.tickle.com/emode/tests/marriage.jsp Courtney: CONGRATULATIONS, and make sure to put Emode on the guest list! Start making your plans now. We have calculated your responses according to our scientific formula and harmonized the results t Courtney: YOU WILL BE MARRIED BY: Saturday, August 5, 2006 Courtney: hahahaha Courtney: stupid test Vanyel: do they have one to predict your divorce, too? -- Vanyel protecting the sanctity of marriage Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2004 %% janet: damn the naysayers janet: I have a togo's hot pastrami here and I'm not afraid to use it -- janet ranting on Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2004 %% janet: wasabi chewing gum. its time has come. -- janet inventing great things Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2004 %% Vanyel: HAMBURGER janet: frankenfurter Moni: mad cow Vanyel: GRR MOO janet: I wonder if Erisians get Mad Chao disease. Vanyel: ow. Moni: oh.. Moni: ouch janet: ewige blumengraft and all that Vanyel: Then again Vanyel: if you piss off a matronly german woman... Vanyel: .. Vanyel: you might get Mad Frou... Moni: heh cuinhell: Mab Brow - out of control unabrow janet: and there's the variant that crossed over to plants janet: mad bough Vanyel: There's the ancient chinese disease of respectful prions that'll cause... Vanyel: mad kowtow janet: oh dear meg: mad mao Vanyel: or, what igadget gets when he's in his van, with his curb feeler Vanyel: mad plough janet: don't make me come over there Courtney: or the japanese greeting disease.. mad bow cuinhell: what every brother wants to avoid...mad hizzow -- it's a mad, mad, mad, mad, mad BBS Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2004 %% tuffkag: you know its been a long day when you look at the screen and say to yourself "who's that fuckball tuffkag?" tuffkag: then only to realize its you *** tuffkag is now known as Xi -- Xi having a very many much extended long day Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2004 %% devil: i think i've spoken to every crackhead in this hemisphere this morning -- devil loving her job Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 January 2004 %% Courtney: I am hungry for electricity knowledge cuinhell: vibe on the fritz? -- Courtney needing education Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2004 %% Vanyel: its already started Vanyel: its 9am in israel, and the emails have already started cuinhell: ewww marcie: ABALABALABLABALA DING DONG INNERWEB BROKEN! cuinhell: hahhaha marcie waves her towel Vanyel: ahahahahah marcie: :) Vanyel: nah with them it would more be Vanyel: *hoooooock spit hock hock click twep twep ken innerweb broken* Vanyel: thats what it'd sound like in hebrew marcie: hahahha -- Vanyel interpreting Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2004 %% ed: *die die die die* ed puts an end to some stupidity *** Sarge has been disconnected marcie: heh -- ed's mighty wrath Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2004 %% wob: mmm steamed asparagus meg: the steamer will make nummy veggies for everyone marcie: mmmm marcie: goot devil: steamed testicles are pretty popular too meg: uh, no devil: i had to eat them in malaysia once devil: honored guest and all Al: *blink* Al: what species? devil: porcine Al: how were they? devil: it's a good thing i had a lot of homemade rice wine to go with them Al: hahahahah -- devil's adventures in traveling Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2004 %% Vanyel: PENISBAGEL devil: never seen one of those Al: wanna go to brueggers? devil: they have penisbagels? Al: we can ask Al: and if they don't Al just lets your imagination finish the thought devil: hrm -- devil considering an offer Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2004 %% devil: sheep are little pieces of shit until you get them on their backs -- devil being kinky Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2004 %% devil: i've never put my arm up a sheep's ass wob: well w hat have you shoved up a sheeps ass devil: i've stuck electric probes up their asses to ejaculate them Slayer: where do i sign up devil: i thought you might volunteer -- Slayer being a guinea pig, so to speak Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2004 %% Cerberus: well, worse comes toworse... Cerberus: you can always go back to sucking dick behind the burger king for money. wob: damn right Cerberus: or work in a NOC.. either one. wob: hehehe wob: i think i'll go for sucking dick wob: its less painful on the ass -- wob's career options Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2004 %% Zorro: i wanna meet bill gates o i can peel out on his nutsack -- Zorro and his Wheelchair of Doom Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2004 %% taco: the US has double the many for the Radio Free broadcasting taco: doubled wob: doubled the many huh wob: is that spanglish taco: mmmmm... maybe I shouldn't have driven home -- taco a wee bit tipsy Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 January 2004 %% wob: goddamn i so love miles davis wob: i want to have his dead baby -- wob with his true love Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 January 2004 %% Slayer: one hop your ass to the market and get me some grapes Al: green or purple? Slayer: purple Al: with or without seeds? Slayer: without, and unpeeled, and served by your hopefully more attractive cousin Slayer: this is "emperor" day Al: hmm Al kicks slay in the nads several times until they bruise and fall off. Al: there ya go, purple and seedless Slayer: good job Al: next! -- Al obeying Slayer's every whim Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2004 %% cuinhell: FRAB NARPLE NIPPLECLIPS *** twinkie has entered room 'Main' twinkie: hidy ho! Vanyel: twinkielicious cuinhell: hrm, not who i intended to summon with that, but ok -- cuinhell summoning Satan Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 January 2004 %% marcie: cute admin chica is asking me about my truck marcie: she is trying to decide what to buy wob: tell her the truck is for dykes only, and that you'll have to make out with her for more info -- wob with car-buying advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 January 2004 %% janet: a loaf of bread, a jug of wine, a kilo of brazilian cocaine, and thou -- janet's ideal date Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2004 %% sunbeam: i need a new calendar Slayer: no, see, you just peel off january and voila! there's february. Vanyel: ahahaha sunbeam: you're an ass -- Slayer, helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2004 %% Moni: I had a dream last night that I got a brazilian bikini wax. Highly painful. I woke up to find Shithead cat kneeding my crotch with her claws. Vanyel: ahahaha Moni: just thought I'd share IGadget: thanks for making me feel normal moni -- Moni has a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2004 %% Vanyel: why would a cat ever have sex if it hurt devil: female cats won't ovulate without stimulation from the spineypenis Vanyel: ah devil: no pain, no babies Vanyel: god, mother nature is quite a bitchj Vanyel: -j janet: you've never done anything fun that hurt, leo? Vanyel: nothing that ever made me screech like a cat getting fucked, no twinkie: well damn twinkie: must try harder marcie: C|N>K -- twinkie making threats Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2004 %% Xi: a jihad upon your packets@! -- Xi raining down curses Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 February 2004 %% janet: 6 hours to L.A., sure janet: but punching through L.A. is a pain, even on I5 Vanyel: jeez, last time I hit LA I did it in less than 5 hours Vanyel: but I was skirting around the edge of it janet: were you driving like a crazed maniac? Vanyel: not a craized one -- Vanyel the *normal* maniac, dammit Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 February 2004 %% devil: man, there are some ugly dogs out there devil: if you are buying a dog that is a "rare breed" devil: don't you think "wait, why is it a rare breed?" devil: "is it because it is buttugly?" marcie: hahahahah -- devil the veterinarian with standrads Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 February 2004 %% Vanyel picks up sarge and hits gadget with him devil: interesting choice of weapon Vanyel: not really, I just grabbed for teh first heavy, blunt object i could find -- Vanyel perpetuating violence Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 February 2004 %% devil: how long should you really have to completely ignore somebody before they go away? janet: devil, having recent experience with this, I can say that restraining orders work better than ignoring. devil: they're my employees janet: dang -- janet with good, but irrelevant, advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2004 %% devil: here's a tip for you all devil: if your vet asks you if your dog ate some of your pot, fess up immediately devil: we can actually tell -- devil the professional Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2004 %% meg: qwest is great at& t is good thank you sprint for all the food amen -- meg praying to her gods Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2004 %% Moni: patient just handed me a 12 page detailed form to fill out and stated I had to fill it out asap, becuase she has to fax it into her employer today Moni: I burst out laughing Moni: I think I need to work on my theraputic skills -- Moni needing job training Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 February 2004 %% Moni: it kinda segwayed into ed's nuts Al: they're coated with salt pepper paprika and who knows what all else -- ed's mighty nuts Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 February 2004 %% Vanyel: netware makes my vagina bleed -- Vanyel having his period Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 February 2004 %% wob: time to go take the afternoon crap and think about the FBI ... wob: aaaaaaaah wob: its so easy to evacuate the lower intestine when i think about the FBI -- wob facilitating a dialogue with the authorities Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2004 %% janet: HP box ate another disk, taking the entire rest of the system now janet: out of 16 boxes in the last 4 months, 5 have now done this janet: these things suck so hard they've wrapped around and are now blowing -- janet hard at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2004 %% china: the curling iron, which was in the bathroom, now looks like a g-spot tickler. -- china on her house catching on fire Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 February 2004 %% meg: i got an email from "permiscuous" meg: is that like a slut with a bad fro -- FROTASTIC! Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 February 2004 %% meg: GET OUTTA MY VULVA YOU DAMN YAPPY DOG -- meg having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 February 2004 %% Moni: oh bummer. I thought I had a piece of chocolate in my desk and I don't Moni: pewp ed: uh..it is a piece of poop ed: or, "poop, I don't have any chocolate" Moni: no pewp in my desk Moni: poop, I don't have any chocolate ed: you've mentioned patients and shitting vomiting before ed: I had to check -- ed checking on Moni's health & well-being Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2004 %% Moni will be happy when her shoulder are out of her earlobes Vanyel: oh shit wait Vanyel: this doesnt have anything to do with the menstrual cycle does it? -- Vanyel needing information Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2004 %% Courtney: god may hate me but beer loves me Courtney: so life is good -- Courtney with her priorities in order Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 February 2004 %% ed: cp /dev/null /vmunix ; reboot ; badge on desk ; resignation-letter-to-boss ; ssh pub marcie: wr0d -- ed quits Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2004 %% devil: dammit, i've been up this dog's butt so many times that it feels like i'm fisting cows again -- devil at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 February 2004 %% devil: mmmm, get the mac devil: most pleasure i've had in my lap in a long time :P -- devil and her Powerbook Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 February 2004 %% marcie: civil disobedience makes me hot -- Vanyel made me quote this Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 February 2004 %% Slayer: that new video card alex had to give me is great Slayer: i can see BSODs in crisp bright colour -- Slayer with PC improvements Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 February 2004 %% Moni: things I don't want to hear, part 6587. While screening a client "Gee Doc, you are one hot mama." Moni bangs her head -- Moni's trials and tribulations Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 February 2004 %% meg: wwjd? jeebus would stfu and take his nailing like a man -- meg on "The Passion of the Christ" Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2004 %% marcie: i am brining the craptop too marcie: and ilife Vanyel: cool Al: miller ilife? Vanyel slaps Al about the head and neck Al: take it easy, bud...of coors you know that slapping me is a becks of a thing to do...I'd have to knock you on your bass. Vanyel: oh god i had to read that twice marcie: hahahahahahha -- Al punning away Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2004 %% Sarge: ok I no longer support gay marriage.. Rosie O'donnell is doing it Sarge: no one should marry her, end of story -- Sarge changing his political position Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2004 %% devil: socks must be arranged with cute underwear in a manner that will distract baggage inspectors and hasten the passage of my bag -- devil packing for a plane trip Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 February 2004 %% K: oh and if pharmaceutical reps try to talk you into one of those hard on pills K: like viagra, cialis, levitra, etc K: just say NO K: i was like my dick works what are ou guys talkin about it enhances, yours isn't good enough? K: but i took the free samples they gave me at the bar K: i got bored. K: i took one K: i had a raging boner for 3 days straight K: never again. -- Kevin having physical problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2004 %% wob: i swear this room is all about sex or computers -- wob with a discovery Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2004 %% saundo: there's nothing like une enormous frenchman^Wshit to make the day right again -- saundo, relieved Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2004 %% taco: I LOVE JESUS!!!!!!! devil: are you fucking possessed? -- devil worried Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2004 %% Moni: I seriously think that Hell consists of endless staff meetings. -- Moni back at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 March 2004 %% Shimbo: i don't mind piss, but i draw the line at shit -- Shimbo setting his sexual standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 March 2004 %% Slayer: the worst is having to haul your 3 and 5 year old cousins with you to the store Slayer: one at a time isn't so bad Slayer: so i just "let" them ride in the trunk Slayer: they stopped fighting after the first few times -- Slayer being a good babysitter Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 March 2004 %% carrye: poo can be fun. -- carrye's entertainment Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 March 2004 %% lisa: why don't i get any fun emails lisa: i don't care how to enlarge my penis -- lisa being bored Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 March 2004 %% ed: how do you all travel with Jake? He is like a midget with a sheepskin on his head wob: we put him in a kennel devil: is he properly kennel trained? ed: does he thrash and kick? devil: or does he purr happily? wob: we just smoke him out beforehand wob: no biggie devil: so he purrs then wob: more or less -- Jake is properly trained Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 March 2004 %% Vanyel: I actually miss irix. Vanyel: maybe its because my asshole has finally healed -- Vanyel craving more punishment Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 March 2004 %% Xi: security design by router monkeys, next on geraldo -- Xi with another exciting day at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2004 %% Slayer: how do you spell eminem, like that white rapper dude ed: "w-i-g-g-e-r" -- ed the spelling champion Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2004 %% Manuka: must be spring Manuka: i can hear the bunnies humping outside my window -- Manuka observing the circle of life Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 March 2004 %% Moni: I'm allergic to work Moni: wonder if I can get workmans comp for that -- Moni pondering the future Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2004 %% Slayer: there's something about waking up and being presented with a plate of freshly cooked heart -- Slayer enjoying breakfast Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 March 2004 %% Moni: Our elderly, one-legged security guard, fell asleep in his chair and peed himself Moni: I love working here -- Moni with a security update Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 March 2004 %% Al: was I about to go look for ice cream, or do I need to buy new socks? Al: should I pour a glass of jim beam, do I need to wind my clocks? Al: I don't know where my head's been, or where it's going to Al: am I bound for the looney bin, or will it be the zoo? Al bows DontKnow: you're already in the zoo. china: that's true Vanyel: i have to poo Al: no surprise, knowing you Vanyel: you just say that cuz I am a jew china: *snork* -- beat poetry on EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 March 2004 %% Vanyel: penises are about as much fun a sbreasts Vanyel: tho, your boobs dont hang between your legs sunbeam: i think it all depends on how big they are -- discussions of anatomy Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 March 2004 %% Courtney went to a fashion show tonight Courtney: by myself Courtney: i drank red wide and felt liek I was on sex and the city Courtney: except Courtney: I was alone days Courtney: and it felt liek everyone was staring at me like "ohh that poor girl couldnt find someone to come with" marcie: i was with you in spirit, courtho marcie: i was in your glass of red wine devil: dude devil: if there was red wine devil: i was there marcie: where you consume two or more drinks in my name, there am i also. -- marcie the religious Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 April 2004 %% Sarge: the best time I had was when a Vice-Provost wanted to rename our res-hall IT support department to Campus Life Information Technology Services meg: ahhaha Sarge: needless to say the acroymn was brought to their attention and they didn't do it marcie: that's a damn shame Sarge: C.L.I.T.S.---Where always here, you just can never find us.. Sarge: where=we're meg: shit meg: when did you get funny -- meg stands amazed Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 April 2004 %% sunbeam: what could i use for a username K: cumwhore9 K: what's wrong with sunbeam? K: i love it sunbeam: it's already taken K: i'm sure it is. sunbeam: so what's another one K: dickslut10 -- K, helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2004 %% janet: mmm lambs blood janet: it makes great salad dressing -- janet celebrating Passover Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 April 2004 %% Sarge: I just picked up a 19 year old drunk off his ass -- Sarge having fun Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 2004 %% ed: the problem here is penetration -- hmmm... Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 2004 %% devil: if you blow through a urinary catheter that has been in a cat's penis, are you essentially blowing a cat? Vanyel: devil, you scare me sometimes Jim: that is one of the most frightening questions ive seen asked here Jim: and given history, thats quite an achievement -- devil freaking everyone out Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 April 2004 %% devil: you know your office is odd when you sit down and realize there is a dead love bird beside your keyboard -- devil's office Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2004 %% IGadget: I need a job again, Ive been fired by the same guy three times, I dont at this point know which of us was the dumber -- IGadget with employment problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2004 %% Vanyel: Ah springtime - the flowers are blooming, the birds are singing and the geologists are again predicting doom for the San Andreas fault -- Vanyel enjoying the season Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 April 2004 %% devil: does getting fucked by the tax man count as having sex? -- devil's new relationship Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 April 2004 %% Slayer: i hate porn with music dweez: turn you speakers off Slayer: but then i can't hear the barking -- Slayer's viewing habits Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2004 %% Slayer: any story that contains the words "throbbing fucktool" is not going to be winning any hugo awards -- Slayer's reading habits Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2004 %% Moni pours devil some hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps devil loves on moni Moni: :> devil: jesus moni, you just came closer to giving me an orgasm than my man the other night :P Moni: YES! -- Moni scoring Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2004 %% T-ruth: Does anyone know a good tutorial on "how to handle boobs?".. I can't find one.. ;-( -- T'ruth needing help Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2004 %% Al: I ran out of brain at work today. -- Al with career difficulties Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2004 %% dweez: i have a penis larger than most women -- dweez bragging Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2004 %% Slayer: oh check it out Slayer: according to Glamour, it's once again men's fault when women don't orgasm Slayer: first women were frigid marcie: depends on the man and woman marcie: heh Slayer: then men were impatient Slayer: then women didn't communicate their feelings to men marcie: it's good to see we're trading off blame Slayer: but now men are goal oriented and think that sex has to end in orgasm Slayer: it's no wonder that women are insane and fucked in the head, reading all this conflicting information in their own magazines Slayer: our magazines always say the same thing Slayer: woman won't go out with you = lesbian Slayer: woman who doesn't orgasm = lesbian marcie: at least you're consistent Slayer: etc Slayer: we have to have some standards marcie: however low they may be Slayer: watch it, lesbian -- Slayer is from Mars Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2004 %% janet: RFC822 motherfucker DO YOU SPEAK IT?!? -- Janet having a rough morning Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2004 %% Vanyel: oh slay Vanyel: theres an olsen twins movie coming out Slayer: unless it's called "twincest" i'm pretty sure i won't be interested -- Slay setting his standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 April 2004 %% Manuka: wow, the things you learn from your kids Manuka: i didn't know that hummus could be used as a hairstyling product -- Manuka learning to be a daddy Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 April 2004 %% dweez: there's nothing i'd like more than a 36 hour erection -- dweez has a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2004 %% Vanyel: mmmm freezer fresh shorts -- the pause that refreshes Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2004 %% saundo: it is odd saundo: but strangely appealing. at least it wasn't *gag* sammy hagar firl: oh whoa there. I <3 Sammay Hagar saundo: uhoh, van halen holy war. need my asbestos underwear for this one! firl: hehehe firl: I think, if Kevin and I ever break up, it will be over Sammy Hagar! saundo: ahahahahaha saundo: he's be the downfall of many a relationship firl: that, and raisins. -- firl with relationship differences Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2004 %% devil: but walking around thinking about how cute my underwear is doesn't lead to a professional countenance Xi: that depends on the profession -- devil the professional Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 April 2004 %% ed: *why* did I not become a gravedigger. -- ed lamenting his choice of profession Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 April 2004 %% Vanyel: I want a caddy. Vanyel: when I run people over, I dont want to feel the bumps -- Vanyel planning his next vehicle purchase Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2004 %% devil: i can't remember the last time i bought milk devil: i prefer to get my calcium from leafy green vegetables devil: gimme broccoli and spinach any day janet: yeah, but broccoli just doesn't work as well on corn flakes -- janet with culinary advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 May 2004 %% Moni: vokda Moni: see..I think about drinking and I stop being abl eto teyp Moni: goddammit -- Moni the substance abuse counselor Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 May 2004 %% ed: and an qwest co tech in the quicklime is worth two in the cement pylon -- ed with sage advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 May 2004 %% K: I HAVE JESUS IN THE TRUNK! -- K going on about religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 May 2004 %% Moni: omg..these adult learning classes have really gotten out there. Moni: Director Joe Gallant and actress Angel Baby demonstrate how to shoot an adult video for a Learning Annex class dweez: uhh Moni: what ever happend to knitting classes -- Moni longing for the good old days Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 May 2004 %% meg: nobody gets laid on CBS -- meg on TV Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 May 2004 %% Jake: mmm maltose Vanyel: maltose Vanyel: thats the kind of sugar that gives you the shits and eats away your insides? Slayer: no, that's called "women" Vanyel: ah. -- Vanyel getting schooled Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 May 2004 %% wob: ok back to t he lab wob: i swear i need a pole to ride down wob: like the bat cave -- wob to the rescue! Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 May 2004 %% dweez gets his wine glass out marcie: gimme devil pours marcie: mmm dweez pretends he's devils father & spanks her for bad behavior marcie: wine devil: ohhhh, spank me big daddy!! devil: :P marcie: C|N>K dweez: hahhahh marcie: good god MOni falls out devil: what'd i do this time? marcie: hahahaha marcie: oh man dweez: C|N>K ? marcie: Coke piped through nose, redirected out to keyboard dweez: C or N is greater htan K? dweez: k janet reads and sputters dweez looks at moni who has fallen out marcie: devil: ohhhh, spank me big daddy!! marcie: devil: :P marcie: devil: ohhhh, spank me big daddy!! marcie: devil: :P marcie: devil: ohhhh, spank me big daddy!! marcie: devil: :P marcie: love it devil: dammit, i never get my homework done around here marcie: LOVE YOU CHRISTY marcie: YOU BIG FREAK marcie: ahahahahhaahaha devil: O:) -- devil making moni's day Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 May 2004 %% Slayer: you know you need to take a step back when you have to pull electrical tape off your ass after masturbating -- Slayer taking a breather Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 2004 %% ed: yo ed: slaywhore the great. Slayer: i like that Slayer: address me thusly henceforth ed: aye ed: slaywhore Slayer: the great ed: I shall shorten it, as is my wont. Slayer: the title is necessary to affirm my glory ed: your glory shall be reaffirmed ed: when the day or reckoning is among us. Slayer: i guess i'll wait then -- royalty learning patience Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 May 2004 %% meg: spam subject: meg: can you really make your wee-wee bigger? meg: if any guy is still calling his a wee-wee meg: he's not ready for it to be bigger -- meg on maturity Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 May 2004 %% saundo: shaddap, or I'll armor plate ed's TWW and let him loose marcie: ooh saundo: that is to say, repair the armor plate marcie: now that's a threat saundo: he'll have the heaviest schlong known to man cuinhell: metal toothpick of doom -- ed's mighty TWW Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 May 2004 %% janet: hm janet: I just heard an earthshattering *whomp* and someone scream, "not there!" marcie: oh dear janet: construction can be so entertaining -- janet enjoying her afternoon Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 June 2004 %% retard: is that a picture of rasputin's penis? Al: uh, no. it's quite worksafe. retard: then i don't wanna see it retard: i've confined my jpg viewing today to one thing and one thing only Al: yeah, but how many pics of Bea Arthur can there possibly be out there? retard: you win again -- Paris with an obsession Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2004 %% Paris: i chopped up a watermelon there once Paris: well, six watermelons Paris: that got me into trouble devil: why did you have six watermelons? Paris: so i could chop them up! marcie: obviously! Paris: perhaps the turtles and i can come to some sort of accord Paris: however, devil Al: or at least a civic Paris: you should acquire a watermelon, and a dowel rod, and a sword devil: no thanks Paris: wait wait, you don't even know where i am going with this Paris: so then, take the watermelon Paris: and hit it with the sword, followed by the dowel rod devil: and where are you going with this? Paris: i'm done Paris: that's why i had six watermelons :) devil: snicker -- Paris's adventures with fruit Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 June 2004 %% K: dig this chick i'm datin: K: i'm sittin here watching television K: and some autozone commercial comes on during the playoffs K: and she goes 'those are some nice vice grips' K: wtf? Veritech: that's a keeper. K: hear hear! Veritech: mine talked me into turning my old scsi drives into a raid. Veritech: so i married her K: werd -- geek love Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 June 2004 %% Al: so I'm going to an anti-low-carb protest rally this evening Vanyel: awesome! Vanyel: i'm all about that Vanyel: i'm on the all-carbs diet Moni: bring donuts marcie: and beer Al: http://www.syracuse.com/search/index.ssf?/base/living-0/108720223027 9563.xml?syrlikra Moni: I love carbs Al: in the trunk of the grape right now... Al: ...are twelve boxes of Twinkies. Al: I work around the corner rom the Hostess shop Moni: and not low-carb Twinkies, I hope Al: $22 of mass-produced artificially sweetened cream-filled pastry Moni: oh ya Moni: so good Al: I'll also take the video cam Al: don't know how many people will show up Al: I'm expecting to see a dozen or so people with about as much of a life as I have Al: :) Al: tho Al: if I'm the smallest person there Al: I'm going to run away scared -- Al the health nut Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 2004 %% Slayer: quick! get some help! my hand and penis are fighting! devil: i bet that's unusual marcie: i'm not sure who to, um, pull for Slayer: just grab somethign and start tugging devil: i prefer to be a nonparticipating, nonobserving bystander as far as possible from the action marcie: what she said -- the girls hiding from the action Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 2004 %% Moni screams at her pants marcie: yeah! -- Moni shouting it out Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2004 %% *** AlFK is now known as Al Moni: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere's Moni: Al! marcie: :) Al: oh...hi. -- Al, thrilled Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2004 %% *** Moni has entered room 'Main' Moni: drinakydrinakydrnkydrunk tish: gee, moni....drink much tonight? Moni: a glssah of wne tish: i think you misspelled bottle -- tishy correcting Moni's spelling Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 June 2004 %% twinkie: i like my men geeky with weird ass tshirts -- twinkie's ideal man Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 June 2004 %% tish: my head hurts tish: i need sex janet: I like your logic -- janet taking notes Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2004 %% ed kicks marcies ass marcie: thanks ed marcie: i love you man ed: I know you do ed: and you'd wonder about how much I loved you, if you knew the last time I even saw hint of a live snatch -- ed with needs Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2004 %% ed sips a beer ed: its goiing to be tough to go back to work for so many reasons. -- ed the slacker Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2004 %% Moni: my pants have shrunk Moni: bad pants -- Moni correcting her clothing Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2004 %% china: when you have ferrets, you don't need cable -- China being entertained Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2004 %% twinkie: maybe i will get a fish Vanyel: kitty. twinkie: and name it kitty Vanyel: i want you to have a kitty, you big dork -- Vanyel's pets Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2004 %% Vanyel just installed a water pik shower thingy in the twinksters bathroom Vanyel: cuz, well, you know Vanyel: i'll be travelling a lot, soon -- Vanyel seeing to his woman's needs Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 June 2004 %% *** dweez has entered room 'Main' dweez: fucking network guy IGadget: is he enjoying it? -- dweezie's new relationship Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 2004 %% devil: my dock was being naughty Moni: spank it devil: i try not to spank things that i sleep with Moni: funny..it's the opposite for me -- devil having computer problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 June 2004 %% Jake: hopefully genetic engineering will provide for custom-tailored livers soon Jake: then I can be drunk 24/7! -- Jake has a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 June 2004 %% wob: thats goddamn disgusting Jake: you're goddamn disgusting Jake: goddamnit wob: goddamnit. wob: TOUCH IT Jake: NO Jake: YOU TOUCH IT Vanyel: woah what did I miss -- brotherly love! Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 June 2004 %% IGadget: hmm there is something Ive been meaning to ask dev. why when a cat is taken to the vet to be spayed or neutered, it is called "getting them fixed" when really you are breaking them. Slayer: to trick them into going voluntarily, of course -- Slayer the clever Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 June 2004 %% krokus: so get to it, you can burn and net at the same time. Moni: The dog found a Stress Ball, ripped it to shreds and scattered little grains of something all over the living room marcie: oh dear Moni: This did not help my stress level -- Moni trying to relax Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 June 2004 %% Vanyel: don't disrespect my religion K: hey i respect all religions K: except star trek -- K the diverse Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2004 %% Vanyel: god K deposits a load into leo's anus marcie: stop praying, leo Vanyel: ooh. marcie: it's bringing you fucked up things Vanyel: I see that. -- Vanyel getting religion Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2004 %% janet: hell, tapeworms can fuck themselves to breed if they want :) Slayer: so can k Slayer: but don't encourage him -- Slayer cautioning the masses Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2004 %% K: marcie K: i drive all aroudn this town marcie: hi K: daily K: nightly marcie: drunk? K: remember who i am. -- K, the man Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2004 %% K: if i smoked weed K: i woudl be too shy to injoy marcie: "if"? K: i stopped smoking weed K: you silly billies janet: aw geez Vanyel: just because you ran out of weed doesnt mean you quit -- Vanyel just says no Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 June 2004 %% twinkie: damn enzyte comercial again! twinkie: i dont want penis enhancement medicine!!!! janet: tell me about it. -- Janet has her priorities Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 2004 %% devil: someday, when i grow up devil: i want to be able to sleep normal hours -- devil has a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 June 2004 %% marcie: the head chik (under the man, of course) is Beverly LaHaye janet: http://www.cwfa.org/main.asp marcie: who is the wife of Tim LaHaye marcie: who wrote the Left Behind series marcie: it's a fundie circlejerk Moni: now there's an image I don't need marcie: heh, sorry janet: ew wob: yeah wob: thats disturbing Moni: Jerk off for Jesus marcie: ahahaha janet: wait a minute...that's not holy water??? wob: Moni: Jerk off for Jesus wob: Moni: Jerk off for Jesus wob: Moni: Jerk off for Jesus wob: hahahaha wob: IM ALL FOR THAT wob: JESUS NEEDS SOME CUM IN HIS EYEW wob: -W janet: fudie bukakke? janet: +n meg: bukakke potluck dinner Moni: WLWJU? What Lube Would Jesus Use? marcie: "let us bow and pray" *spooge* meg: let us bob our heads up and down on the knob of christ marcie: that really, *really* needs to be a porno Moni: oh ya Moni: with all the diciples janet: I'm sure there's at least one out there marcie: most definitely marcie: including "the disciple Jesus loved" janet: an anti the-devil-in-miss-jones wob: bobbin' f or christ marcie: it can't be wrong, it's in the bible! Moni: and just HOW did Judas betray Jesus? meg: filled with the holy spirit marcie: you know it Moni: oh..it could even include a prison scene marcie: totally janet: Jesus II: He's back, He's mad, and they'll never cross him again. Moni: and satan buttplugs marcie: and some hurt/comfort sex with jesus praying the night before the crucifixion marcie: yeah marcie: i like it janet: the real passion of christ? marcie: hahaha marcie: yes! wob: hahahaha wob: The passion of Little Christ meg: jesus would be a bottom i bet meg: his pain, your gain wob: yeah marcie: he's a big hippie wob: he's not a drver wob: driver marcie: he could never be a top Moni: He's the orginal Hippie marcie: too busy trying to score weed to worry about it wob: hahahaha Moni: long hair, sandles wob: spliff in his mouth, dick in his ass marcie: damn right meg: man why isn't k here right now marcie: YEAH janet: we are now armed with mighty joint. Moni: little bondage in there too with the cross scene Moni: some SM with the flogging janet: mmm Moni: we've got it all marcie: yes Moni: I'm so going to hell. Moni: Oh wait Moni: I'm Jewish Moni: there IS not hell wob: yeah so you're going anyway wob: ;) marcie: ahahah Moni: woohoo! marcie converts to judaism marcie: let's go! wob: remember, only the mormons goto heaven wob: the rest of us are fucked! janet: isn't jewish hell supposed to be having to pay retail? Moni: DK is so Not going to heaven wob: hahaha Moni 5's Janet wob: yes, its paying everything in even dollar amounts wob: isntead of 9.95 marcie: and all god's people said "amen!" -- loading up the bus to hell yet again Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 July 2004 %% janet does another line of cocoa powder -- Janet's habit Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 July 2004 %% Moni: you know you work in Rehab when the bathroom reading material is the AA Big Book. -- Moni's work Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 July 2004 %% Vanyel: Is hanging articles you've written in your office too much of an ego trip? cuinhell: depends on the ego Vanyel: mine cuinhell: no Vanyel: ok -- Vanyel attempting humility Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 July 2004 %% ed: fucking garbage men refused to take our trash this morning. ed: I've got two full cans of stinking shit ed: nasty note attached "over 50lbs" ed: no fucking shit! Vanyel: "We're sorry, your trash is not smelly and stinky enough. Try again, trollbait!" Vanyel: over 50lbs? ed: one of them has 30lbs of wet, stinky grain from sundays brew-session Vanyel: what the fuck? Moni: ew ed: the other has 30lbs of stinky, catshitfilled litter Vanyel: I mean jesus christ ed: I say ed: if you don't want to lift heavy stinky shit ed: go to fucking college -- ed being classist Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 2004 %% Vanyel: living in california is like living in an abusive relationship. You may love it, but it won't stop beating the crap out of you till you leave it -- Vanyel's love life Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 2004 %% wob: my life has just halted. google is broke. -- wob in the midst of a crisis Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 2004 %% janet debates whether it's worth the effort of small claims court for $100 Slayer: probably not Slayer: i don't think it's worth it and i'm poor janet: more to send a message than anything else Al: bah. Slayer: that's usually a waste of time and resources Al: Jerry can, $5 Slayer: but go ahead Al: two gallons of gas, $5 Al: book of matches, 59c Al: sending a message, priceless. -- Al with the solution Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 July 2004 %% marcie: good morning ed :) ed: wordup, my favorite dykeee ed: I almost had a wet dream last night ed: you were not present Slayer: was i? ed: maybe Slayer: naughty ed: do you like to dress up like a teletubby? Slayer: who told? -- Slayer's perversions Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 2004 %% Slayer: the high today is supposed to be 98 marcie: yeah tell me about it Slayer: no marcie: okay Slayer: i'm going to cry in the fridge instead -- Slayer, crazy with the heat Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 July 2004 %% Slayer: who wants homemade biscuits, eggs, and ham? marcie: that would roughly be me twinkie: sounds good twinkie: i havent ate today Slayer: ha ha too late we already got them all marcie: bastard! twinkie: meanie Slayer: well maybe if yall woke me up the way my girl did... twinkie: drooled on you marcie: ahahah twinkie: well that is one way to wake up indeed -- twinkie waking up Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 July 2004 %% Jim: A fin appearing and disappearing in your bath is a very bad sign -- Jim having problems bathing Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 2004 %% Jim: Sat ell ite I PS er r ^H^H^H^H FUCKING LATENCY! -- Jim having lag issues Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 2004 %% Slayer: you gotta squeeze a little, squeeze a little, tease a little more janet: I probably don't want to know what you're talking about. Slayer: heathen Slayer: don't you know def leppard? marcie: easy operator, come a-knockin on my dooooor Slayer: yes Slayer lesbian kisses marcie marcie swoons or something Slayer: good enough janet: yeah I know the song :P Slayer: good girl Slayer: you may live for 24 more of your earth hours Slayer: that would be something, if aliens based our worth of living on our knowledge of glam rock lyrics. janet: great janet: now I've got 'true colors' stuck in my head Slayer: my work here is done janet: curse you cyndi lauper!!! -- janet and Slay's battle of the bands Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 2004 %% Slayer: i've decided i want joe pesci to sing at my wedding if i ever have one -- Slayer planning for the future Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 2004 %% Vanyel: the boardroom smelled like fried abbajabba -- Van on non-bathing engineers Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 July 2004 %% dweez: i've never smoked a doob rolled in dried 12yr old boy foreskin -- dweez's world travels Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 July 2004 %% Slayer: and if you're in a jam i'll let you hold my nuts Vanyel: uhm. Vanyel: thanks. Vanyel: I got my own pair though. -- Vanyel turning down an offer Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 July 2004 %% Vanyel: 73% humidity Vanyel: what the FUCK is up with that IGadget: its 100% humid here IGadget: then again its raining -- IGadget on the weather Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 July 2004 %% china: man, being alone in the house again is kinda nice china: I forgot that I can just crank it on up in the other room china: and walk around nekkid Al: *perk* china: well, I need to finish putting up curtains really china: ;) china: or start charging -- China gaining a second business Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 July 2004 %% china: Her son could probably use some material from the quote file for his ventriloquist act, though marcie: hahahaha china: Can you see it now? JJ names his new dummy "k" -- China on her boss Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 July 2004 %% dweez: tonight i drank mor than 'normal' wob: well a true wino drinks straight outa the bag Jake: right wob: like a bum. wob: whats normal? a bottle? 2 bottles? wob: :) dweez: no bag wob: GIMME BAGGIE wob: b4gg13 china: no, a TRUE wino can drink it straight out of the bag AFTER the bottle has broken and BEFORE and can leak out Al: damn. china: it can leak out Moni: impressive china: I'm Nancy, and I *AM* an alcoholic marcie: very marcie grins dweez: no lie china bows -- China the expert Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2004 %% janet: this place needs streaming bagpipe music -- janet making plans Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 July 2004 %% Al: I IOW, and when I come back, the topic is poop again. Al: ah, this is such a warm fuzzy homey kinda place :) -- Al feels the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 2004 %% megafk: "in case of rapture this bbs will finally be k-free" -- meg, full of hope Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 July 2004 %% Slayer: i found one of the funniest sites i've seen in a while Slayer: it was instructions for "real christians" on how to answer jehovah's witnesses marcie: ha marcie: let's see Slayer: it was not unlike watching two geeks slapfight -- Slayer the religion student Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 July 2004 %% marcie: i need to wash my eyebrow piercing again marcie: good thing saliva has healing properties marcie pulls her tongue back in devil: oh my Moni faints devil: maybe i should turn to the other side Moni: yes..see what you are missing marcie: that's damn right -- marcie impressing the girlies Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 July 2004 %% devil: i'm gonna regrow my virginity dweez: really? devil: yeah dweez: cool! devil: some people grow tomatoes -- devil's new hobby Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 July 2004 %% ed: mahahahaha ed: you can drink for free at my house wob: hahhahaah ed: you just have to belly up to the coq Vanyel: yeah ed Vanyel: goddamnit Vanyel: next time, you have to come marcie: yes marcie: fucking ed ed cums on leo Vanyel: i should have seen that Vanyel: err Vanyel: approaching -- Vanyel making a Freudian slip Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 July 2004 %% sunbeam: but i'm 100% ca. girl twinkie: yeah twinkie: i am not twinkie: obviously sunbeam: i use the word totally too often to move to any other state -- sunbeam the California girl, OMG, totally Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 July 2004 %% Jake: you all are so mean -- Jake getting his feelings hurt Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 July 2004 %% Moni: dammit!!! Moni: just poured coffee on myself marcie passes moni the napkins Moni sucks on her skirt marcie blinks Moni: not gonna waste a latte -- Moni wastes not, wants not Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 July 2004 %% Spanky: i am outside at a starbucks enjoying the yuppie lifestyle Spanky: i am also bringing peace and harmony to the world Spanky: through song Spanky: and masturbation -- Quasar making the world a better place Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 July 2004 %% china: ya know, I'm worried about one of my cats china: about 5:00 in the morning, he starts making out with me marcie: *snork* china: I mean, I'm hard up, but damn -- china having romantic difficulties Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 2004 %% Vanyel: rubadub dub, i net from the tub! -- Vanyel the addict Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 July 2004 %% devil: must we always talk about eating pussy around here? wob: yes. Kestrel: yes marcie: yes devil: i really must start hanging out with straight women -- devil needing friends Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 July 2004 %% china: who's touring with van halen these days anyhow? Al: a staff of geriatric nurses -- dweez's favorite band on tour Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 August 2004 %% marcie: ahahahhaAHHAAHAA marcie: K hugs janet if he isn't wearing makeup marcie: marcie: i didn't know you wore makeup, K marcie: marcie: the things i learn when i pay attention marcie: the things I find when I go through my logs meg: k likes to be pretty sometimes too -- meg sticking up for K Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 August 2004 %% meg: WHY CAN'T WE LOAD THE CHRISTIAN RIGHT ONTO A ROCKET AND SHOOT THEM INTO THE CENTER OF THE SUN SO THEY CAN BE CLOSER TO JEEBUS -- meg being rantalicious Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 August 2004 %% meg: i'm gonna go crap out a republican turd now marcie: very good ed: it'll hurt marcie: name it W ed: something that dense has to be tough going on the colon -- ed with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 August 2004 %% devil: do you ever look down at your boob, realize there is a 2 inch scratch on it and think "how did i get that? i haven't even had any naughty sex lately" -- devil with unexplained injuries Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 August 2004 %% K: i'm losing my frontal lobe -- K explains it all Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2004 %% ed: for the right brew ed: I'd gobble a cock -- ed and his love affair with beer Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2004 %% Slayer: homosexual sluts Slayer: sorry, k left and it felt empty Jake: duh devil: he just left cuz he felt his latent homosexuality stirring ed: he so wanted to bang jake. Slayer: who doesn't devil: nod -- Jake is popular Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2004 %% Jake: all I remember was a hellishly cold darkness Jake: that is all I remember from december devil: i commonly leave that impression -- devil scaring Jake off Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2004 %% Jake: damnit christy Jake: you need to be drinking more booze Jake: MORE I SAY devil: i know! devil: i need somebody to drink with me! Jake: get a pet Jake: or something inflatable devil: have pets devil: they are teetotallers -- devil's problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2004 %% Moni: I just farted and the dog looked at me reproacfully and left the room Moni follows the dog to go and fart on her Moni: hence my entertainment on a Sunday evening Vanyel: you dont like that dog do you -- Moni, the non-animal-lover Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2004 %% Moni: NBC, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. -- Track & Field; Trampoline Final Moni: Trampoline is a sport? Vanyel: it is if the women do it -- boingy boingy boingy Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2004 %% Beastie: fuck i wanna move to san fran and pee on folks -- Beastie with career aspirations Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2004 %% *** Jake has been disconnected *** meg has been disconnected marcie: there goes luvewe *** wob has been disconnected tish: ahahaha tish: the family that nets together gets booted together -- tish with the moral of the story Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2004 %% haley: i almost got my lip ring ripped out... Slayer: ouch Slayer: how? haley: kissing my bf:) Slayer: again, how? haley: my ring got caught on his ...and we were standing, saying goodbye...and we pulled away, not realizing we were stuck until it hurt -- love among freaks Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 August 2004 %% K: you're fag parsley -- K with accusations Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 August 2004 %% janet burps almonds Vanyel: sexy janet: damn right -- janet being sexy Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 August 2004 %% devil: i love this town devil: i saw more penises yesterday than i've ever seen in a single day before -- devil on vacation Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 August 2004 %% devil: i wanna have mandatory evacuations on every beach trip devil: it gets rid of all of the people who don't want to party devil: and just leaves the fun people -- devil riding out the hurricane Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 August 2004 %% Vanyel: good heavens! it appears my wee-wee has been stricken with rigor mortis! -- Vanyel having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 August 2004 %% tish: bob ross died...the guy on pbs who always painted "happy little trees" and shit tish: no wonder his show is never on anymore marcie: he wasn't already dead? Pronell: he's been dead for ages marcie: heh meg: are you perusing some kinda celeb death list or something Pronell: died from a happy little tumor -- Pronell's happy little quote Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 August 2004 %% haley: eww haley: the dogs are dyking out in the entry way marcie: awesome Pronell blinks. haley: lesbian olympics in the house marcie: yeah! haley: but one's bleeding haley: eww marcie: uh marcie: ew meg: hey now marcie: that's not how we do it where *i'm* from... haley: I didn't ever want to see a dog's parts like I have this weekend meg: that did not need to be shared Pronell: Now that's an untapped porn market, I'm sure. -- haley's house Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 2004 %% Moni: heh..just walked into the staff room and interrupted four male therapists discussing pewp Moni: "well ya..I pooped three times today." marcie: it's like "Eagle's Nest: the live-action roleplaying game" Moni: they got real quiet when I entered the room Moni: 'zactly marcie: if only they knew devil: did you act all demure like you never talk about poopies? Moni: yes janet plots a histogram of the use of the word "ass" on EN by month marcie feers devil: fools -- Moni the demure Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 2004 %% devil: girls have colons :P devil: they are just rose-filled fragrant gardens of gaslessness lanthis coughs -- devil answering sunbeam's question Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 2004 %% janet: darnit janet: I miss recess janet: when all your problems went away for 30 minutes marcie: and you could run around screaming and thrwoing things at people? marcie: yeah marcie: i miss that too marcie: ;) janet: it would sure give me more job satisfaction if I could get all the tenured faculty into the middle of a dodgeball game wob: hahaha -- janet wishing for days of yore Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2004 %% T: i was at a local restaurant today with mom and was very surprised to see we had a visitor at the table. T: El cucaracha nino T: we left in a hurry Jake: ick Jake: thats no good T: you ain't kidding Vanyel: racist! youj dont like spanish cochroaches! marcie: ahhahahaha -- T the insect racist Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2004 %% Vanyel: everyone in this area needs to turn down their fucking sound Vanyel: the guy behind me has something that makes the most annoying sound Vanyel: it sounds like tinkerbell taking a shit -- Vanyel annoyed at work, as usual Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 2004 %% Kestrel: now I have to ask Jen how ESS applies to mating strategies in gays... she has to explain SO much about the world to me Kestrel: and wipe my chin after meals Kestrel: help pull up the depends Kestrel: trim the hedge that grows from the ears Kestrel: pluck the grey pubies Kestrel: shave the back Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: one of the great things about my woman Vanyel: she shaves mine marcie: ew. Kestrel: I was just kidding about the above list Kestrel: now I feel a little light headed -- Kestrel getting in over his head Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 August 2004 %% wob: lets have devil sex. devil: scuse me? -- devil taking precautions Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 August 2004 %% meg: we're gonna have a black female jewish president meg: when winged monkeys take tot he skies from Jake's fro -- meg predicting the future of politics Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2004 %% Moni got black on them and started wiggling her head around Moni: I think they felt that meg: hahah marcie: hahaha meg: nice marcie: you're channelling some of your patients Moni: I think so meg: OH NO YOU DI"ENT Moni: Little Crackhead commen through me Vanyel: god Vanyel: we almost need a new form of punctuation for that Vanyel: the niglet -- Vanyel the grammar maven Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2004 %% *** megzzz is now known as meg marcie: megzzzzzzzz meg: not anymore unfortunately meg: i was having a nightmare marcie: suq meg: i was being forced to watch a britney spears video in which she was topless and had her nipples painted to look like eyes marcie: ahahahahahahah meg: enough to shock any poor het girl out of slumber -- meg having bad dreams Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 2004 %% Al: is that a 350 thread count spreadsheet? Al: oh, I'm thinking bedsheet. marcie: don't make me turn up the Madonna mp3s janet flannels al Al becomes confused and stops to think Al: "flannel" used as a verb means...? janet snickers Al: dammit it's not my fault I'm naive janet: I like obscure words, ok? Al: that's most definitely ok janet: I'll give you a hint, it's brit slang Al: dictionary.reference.com only lists noun definitions Moni vogues Al: as does urbandictionary.com janet: it means to confuse, to distract janet: seems I was successful :) Al: AHHAHAAHAHAHAH Al falls out Al: janet you fucking rule marcie: :D janet smirks -- janet employing words of mass distraction Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 2004 %% twinkie: someone is cooking asshole -- twinkie's neighbors Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 2004 %% Vanyel: Kobalt writes "A few news services are reporting that Russian computer expert, Aleksandr Gostev from Kaspersky Labs, has predicted that a large chunk of the Internet will be shut down tomorr Vanyel: row by cyber terrorists ed: excellent. ed: I can call it a day, then. -- ed blowing off work Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 August 2004 %% ed: anger management is for pussies ed eyeballs the phone-dent in the wall of his office ed looks over and reminisces about the coffee-cup hole in the wall behind the storage cabinet -- ed controlling himself Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 August 2004 %% ed: poo is an important part of EN life. devil: poo is a highly important part of my life devil: if it weren't for diarrhea, i'd be a lot poorer than i am now Al: so you're..."filthy rich" ? :D meg: so long as she isnt rolling in it -- poo talk Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 August 2004 %% china: Ya know, Martha Stewart deserves to be in jail. I went to KMart today and spent $50 for her candles, the bitch -- china undergoing retail therapy Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 August 2004 %% elric: I was there for like a day in June. Would you believe they actually have a restraunt called Hitlers there? I thought about eating there just so I could tell Van they have really good elric: pork chops -- elric in South Korea Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 August 2004 %% Vanyel: Moni: splish splash I was getting fucked in the ass Vanyel: Moni: long about a saturday night dweez 5's cerb Vanyel: god i love the quote file marcie: werd Cerberus: ah, memories.. Cerberus: err Cerberus hides -- Cerb being nostalgic Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 2004 %% haley has a nice fat dick K: mmmmm haley -- K lusting Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 2004 %% Slayer: you're more annoying than bras with more than one hook -- Slayer insulting K Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 2004 %% haley: i give one hell of a titty fuck -- haley's special talents Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 August 2004 %% dweez: fuck win2k ed dweez: fuck it with jakes dick ed: I don't think jakes dick is powerful enough to fuck windows the way it needs fucked -- ed needing a bigger LART Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 September 2004 %% devil: i'm going to rename myself devil: my new name is "shewhohasnotstartedthepaperthatisduetonight" devil: and my nickname shall be lazybitch -- devil claiming her identity Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 September 2004 %% devil: finally got my lazy ass around to writing my paper devil: it's not half bad if i do say so myself meg: wow your ass can write? Sarge: anal writing.. next on opera.. devil: nods devil: you should see the shit that comes out of it Sarge: no thanks.. -- devil the academic Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 September 2004 %% meg: a heart to butt chat meg: sounds like a tagline for the edwards/cheney debates -- meg on the vice presidential candidates Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 September 2004 %% devil: apparently that technician that i accidentally slept with that I was so excited about quitting may be coming back devil: he's definitely coming back for labor day and desperately wants his old job back Al: is that the only reason you don't want him there? IGadget: how do you accidently sleep with somone? devil: if you've never accidentally slept with anyone, then your life must be fairly boring :P -- sex and the single veterinarian Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 September 2004 %% meg: leo's got a fro wig? twinkie: what? twinkie: i must have missed something marcie: O:) twinkie: he could make his own fro wig though marcie: yes Al: knitted from his back hair? marcie: just shave his back twinkie: thank god for seperate bathrooms -- twinkie giving thanks Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 September 2004 %% meg: some other friends of ours made up a new 7stud game janet: 5-stud too, but it can get so cutthroat K: the cadillac of poker is the best meg: inspired by "low chicago" meg: it's called meg: get this meg: "gay francisco" janet: *laugh* meg: it rules marcie: ha janet: queens wild? marcie: cool marcie: hahahah meg: yes marcie: awesome meg: jacks in the hole are worth another hole card marcie: HAHAHA marcie: sweet! meg: and NO STRAIGHTS ALLOWED janet: you have to show the jack though, right? marcie: werd up janet: hee -- meg playing poker Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 2004 %% Vanyel: http://10eastern.com/images/FoundPhotos/images/9-2/IMAG0029.jpg Moni: and why are we seeing a potty picture? Vanyel: oops marcie: ha Vanyel: its not 2 chicks making out? Moni: no marcie: HAHAHAHA Moni: it's a pic of a toilet Moni: heh janet cracks up -- Leo looking for love in all the wrong places Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 September 2004 %% Sarge: slayer can read a book? Sarge: I thought he could only color them Slayer: sarge, i'm a fuck lot smarter than most people, probably including yourself Sarge: so hostile.. Sarge sends slayer a book on anger management.. Slayer: fuck that, i can't read Sarge: ok audio book then.. Courtney: I will actually testify to slay being pretty intelligent Courtney: hes like jessica simpson, he just plays dumb to get attention from boys Courtney: :) marcie: pahahahah -- Slayer the manwhore Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 September 2004 %% Moni: I've never met a man who I wanted to stomp on his bare shaved tender genetalia more. -- Moni on her former landlord Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 2004 %% china: i wonder if their ages are wrong, though china: because they are already having orgies china: devvy! devil: china:) devil: who is having orgies and why wasn't i invited? china: how are ya! china: my cats, and that's why. ;) devil: i'm fabulous, i just gorged upon divinely fresh sushi china: i figured you see enough of that day in and day out devil: oh yeah, cats have shamefully small penises china: HAHAHAHAH -- devil with relevant knowledge Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 2004 %% meg: mmm naked dan rather -- meg's odd fetishes Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 September 2004 %% devil: i seem to have developed a compulsive eating problem devil: maybe it's pms devil: oh hell yeah it is devil: why do i have to keep having this shit? devil: i want a hysterectomy devil: why won't these asshole doctors take out my uterus if i want them Al: ...because that wouldn't solve your problems? devil: bleed out your penis every 4 weeks for a few years and then tell me your opinion devil: until then, i'm not interested -- devil the righteously bitchy Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 September 2004 %% meg: cat is making out with my elbow devil: nastay meg: nah it's cute -- meg getting lucky Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 2004 %% devil: i've had cats with more skills massage my tits -- devil on BadTitMan Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 September 2004 %% janet: cold, a window got left open overnight janet: not every day you open your office door and find fog -- janet's adventures at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 September 2004 %% devil: i am such a bitch devil: but at least i have cute hair -- devil the fabulous Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 September 2004 %% devil: another day, another orgy: life on en -- devil with an update Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 September 2004 %% Moni: oh geeze..someone on one of my mailing list is looking for a trans/or queer friendly podiatrist. Moni: why would your foot doctor have to be queer friendly? Moni: they don't need to know your sexual orientation Moni: my big toe is a lesbian and it is ingrown -- Moni's lesbian toes Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 September 2004 %% china: the only people more inbred than southerners are the british china: which explains prince charles' ugly ass marcie: werd ed: muahahah china: I think at this point, I'm my own cousin or something -- china on inbreeding Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 September 2004 %% janet pauses for a moment to consider that flamethrowers are completely unregulated by the BATF, even if handheld -- janet with a tip Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 September 2004 %% lisa: shit lisa: i can't follow this marcie: aw marcie types slower lisa: thank you marcie: any time -- lisa, durnk Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 September 2004 %% janet: UTILITY TO BE SHUT DOWN: Fire Sprinklers janet rubs her hands gleefully marcie: oh god marcie: i don't want to know what you're planning. janet: ok janet: back in a few *** janet is now known as janetafk marcie: if we hear reports of fire and destruction at UC santa cruz, we'll know why ;) janetafk: you can't blame me for the earthquake. marcie: oh jesus. -- janet, plotting Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 September 2004 %% janet does the "running on 4 hours sleep and coming off a stimulant crash" head-clearing meditation. marcie: ...which would be? janet: head down, held by hands, muttering, "why me" -- janet enjoying work Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 September 2004 %% firl: ok. someone in my living room farted and no one is confessing. marcie: blame it on the dog! firl: we only have a cat. firl: do cats fart? marcie: mine do firl: alright. the cat did it! marcie: werd -- firl placing the blame where it belongs Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 September 2004 %% Slayer: other than left shift, both shifts, f1, f5, f8, and f11, what would you recommend for getting into bios Jake: a pry-bar -- Slayer having PC troubles Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 September 2004 %% Slayer: games are fucking huge these days Slayer: a 360k floppy used to hold and entire top name $50 game Slayer: i'm sure they were even smaller for the price before then too Slayer: the sims 2 takes 4 CDs Slayer: and it's not going to help me get laid by hot cheerleaders any more than pac man did -- Slayer sighing for the old days Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2004 %% ed: today is the day of wierd broken shit Slayer: thanks. i just got a bluescreen. -- Slayer PC being cursed Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2004 %% janet: the dhcp-whackamole-script-o-doom is working marcie: mmm whackamole janet: now to turn it lose on the production nets janet: like a piano falling from heaven marcie cackles quietly janet: there needs to be an SNMP standard for "give console user a 10kv shock" -- janet LARTing lusers Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 September 2004 %% Vanyel: I feel like I just coughed up a small baby Vanyel: I wonder if a big enough piece of phlegm can be self-aware -- Vanyel battling the Martian Death Flu Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 2004 %% meg: my nose makes it's own bubblegum! -- meg, sick Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 September 2004 %% janet: ugh janet: massive headache janet: stuffed with cold meds janet: can't blink janet: and I need to drive home janet: through eel infested waters janet: well, deer, anyway -- janet, also sick Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2004 %% china: When I worked at Augusta State, the dress code was "Not Naked" -- china complaining about her job Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2004 %% Sarge: its tough to watch a hot naked chick showering when her skin is falling off -- Sarge watching a horror movie Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2004 %% Vanyel: oh my god it's some alternative band's remake of the free software song Vanyel: dammit I need to start KEDR up again. devil: i agree Vanyel: I started an itunes genre for songs like this Vanyel: "wrong" -- Vanyel on music Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 October 2004 %% Moni: cute dog Beastie: i know Beastie: he takes after me -- Beastie's dog Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 October 2004 %% Al: why did McCholesterol discontinue my salad? Slayer: it didn't pass the fat test -- Slayer explains nutrition Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2004 %% K: marcie. you're a woman. K: don't ignore that blood please K: sop that shit up. marcie: i am? marcie checks down her pants marcie: shit! marcie: that's where i've been going wrong all those years! marcie bleeds on K marcie: dammit marcie: you're right! marcie: you fucker, if it wasn't for you i'd never have realized! Courtney: hahahaha Vanyel: goddamnit joy Vanyel: i'm laughing so hard i'm coughing marcie: sorry dude Vanyel: you are not sorry. Vanyel: you are TRYING to kill me. Vanyel: I just know it. marcie: yes. marcie: i am. marcie: did i mention we changed your life insurance beneficiary? Vanyel: no. marcie: oops. -- marcie with murder on her mind Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2004 %% K: man don't think that hard aobut my penis -- K being attractive Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2004 %% janet: when I was looking at names, I looked at some celtic ones marcie: ha janet: they all ended up like Cwyngwlfadyllr or something marcie: excellent janet: pronounced 'bruce' marcie: bahaahaha -- janet on computer names Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2004 %% janet: I used to admin secs.csun.edu, pronounced "sex" marcie: :) janet: tentacle.secs was sadly short lived -- janet's work history Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2004 %% ed: I'll watch a debate when its "CAGE MATCH 2008! KERRY vs Pat Roberts" -- ed on the Presidential election Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 2004 %% ed: cool ed: sometimes you've got more worth than the golden shower fantasies that I put you in when I'm alone at night. marcie: ahahhaha jesus christ ed marcie: i love you man Vanyel: mommy i'm scared -- ed loving up on Vanyel Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 2004 %% wob: geesus movies are expensive wob: 12 bucks wob: nmap better go faster wob: SCANNIGN FOR PRON wob: YEAH wob: SHOW ME THE MONEY SHOT -- wob breaking into his hotel's wireless Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 October 2004 %% Vanyel: I'm a one-man life wrecking machine, baby -- Vanyel on a rampage Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 October 2004 %% wob: werd, superman died wob: guess he wasnt so super wob: AHrARHrhar -- wob being bad Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2004 %% ed: this babies ass smells like death encapsulated -- ed's beloved offspring Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2004 %% Vanyel: dont make me smack you with my penis marcie: me or kes? Vanyel: you joy *** Kestrel has been disconnected marcie: dammit leo marcie: now look what you did janet cracks up marcie: the mere threat was enough to make him disappear Vanyel: I guess I hurt his feelings. -- Leo wielding the JewTWW O' Doom Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2004 %% Kestrel: I AM JUST PISSED I DIDN'T HAVE HIS BABY, AS IF MY BUNG WAS NOT SWEET ENOUGH, OH THE CRUELTY -- Kes lamenting missing ed Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2004 %% marcie: go go gadget disaster recovery plan ed: DR? marcie: aw yeah baby ed: DR is a match, a can of gas, and a couple well-placed soft and hard copies of your resume -- ed with tips on work Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 October 2004 %% ed sha1's Xi's ass Xi: thanks dweez hacks it Xi: COME ON IN! Xi: ROOT ME! ed: xi couldn't root a fucking carrot ed: er ed: dweez dweez: root@xisass:$ /bin/rm -rf / Xi: what? no dd action this time? Xi: come on, my ass is lonely marcie: that's so sweet dweez: nah - i just cleaned out your colon, xi Xi: and I do appreciate that dweez: gotta love those used motor oil enemas Xi: I thought you smelled of diesel oil and crankcase lube marcie: he'll lube your crankcase, baybee dweez: damn right -- manly love on EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 October 2004 %% Moni: oh..I can enlarge my penis in just one week! Slayer: that's a very idiotic view to have -- Slayer reprimanding Moni Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 October 2004 %% ed: Like me, leo could find something to gripe about with a half key of coke in one hand, 4 models working his knob, and a suitcase full of unmarked bills at his feet -- ed on Vanyel's sunny outlook on life Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 October 2004 %% ed pops Xi's cherry Xi: thanks, I've been meaning to have that done -- ed deflowering Xi Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 October 2004 %% janet: you know, rap & hip-hop has missed out on sampling classical music janet: think of the possibilities janet: "Baby Got Bach" marcie: oh god. janet: "Can't Touch Liszt" marcie: janet. janet: I know, up the voltage. -- janet contemplating music Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 October 2004 %% meg: heh what if social security was like one of those "sponsor a starving child in africa" programs meg: each taxpayer would be assigned an old person meg: and they would write you and send you pictures they drew meg: hahahh Sarge: haha meg Sarge: this is anna, she is 72 and on welfare.. for only $.02 a day you can... -- solving the Social Security problem Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 October 2004 %% wob: i was in wyoming last week wob: good sheep fucking there. -- wob updating us on his sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 October 2004 %% Vanyel: my head is killing me ed: must be something in the air today ed: same here ed: pounding headache ed: there must be a total stupidity convergence going on. -- ed with the answer to pain Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 October 2004 %% devil: i wanna be a kept woman when i grow up -- devil has a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 October 2004 %% wob: my dickhead boss at viawaste wob: has a fucking BAD reputation around the ISP industry here wob: all the sales engineers that ive worked with know him wob: all hate him wob: all know hes a jackass marcie: yeah marcie: it will soon suck to be him marcie: if it doesn't already wob: nah wob: he's at a company full of jackasses wob: he fits right in -- wob's former employer Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 October 2004 %% ed pillages dweez ass ed: I AM GHENGIS KHAN ed: AND YOUR ASS IS SOUTHERN MANCHURIA ed: the year is 1275 marcie: the name of the place is Babylon 5 marcie: oh wait marcie: that's something else ed: your ass, fresh from battle, has been settled by nomadic herdsman who are now attempting their hand at farming marcie: ahahhha marcie: goddammit ed marcie: i'm on the phone marcie: and laughing ed: within 10 years, they find your ass to be quite fertile, building settlements and setting up local government ed: and then ed: Ghengis Khan catches wind of your asses fertile crescent ed: he begins his preparations ed: Ghengis Khan plans to INVADE YOUR ASS dweez: damn i love you -- dweez feeling the manlove Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 October 2004 %% lisa: really, i don't know, i am wearing fleece and a heavy sweatshirt lisa: but my feet are cold wob: texan lisa: whatever lisa: wait lisa: yeah i am lisa: dammit -- lisa making a horrifying discovery Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2004 %% ed: the internet is evil Xi: and pointy -- the horror! Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2004 %% Vanyel: I hate credit cards devil: whyfor? Vanyel: cuz they suck Vanyel: and my demn blender siezed up K: you blended your credit cards? Vanyel: yeah I hear its a good way to improve credit Vanyel: drinking a credit card shake K: i've tried it K: don't recommend it -- K improving his credit score Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2004 %% devil: plus, mine are wombat lodge uggs devil: they have sentimental value devil: i had some of the best sex of my life in those uggboots marcie: ahahahaha marcie: i love you dev devil: the heater didn't work real well in my dorm room at the time -- devil on her favorite boots Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 October 2004 %% Slayer: that old saying about catching flies with honey is fucking bullshit Slayer: you might nit catch many with vinegar, but honey doesn't do a damned thing Slayer: for THREE WEEKS this one fly has been buzzing around my room. i don't want to hear anything about the lifespan of a fly. this fucker is immortal. Slayer: i can't kill it Slayer: i put some honey in a mt dew bottle in hopes that it would fly into it and i could slap the cap on Slayer: that was 4 days ago Slayer: it won't go near it marcie: it's heard that cliche too Slayer: zip keeps trying to knock it over, though megafk: you can however catch cats with honey Slayer: she keeps chasing the fly too, but she's way too slow megafk: but then you just have a sticky cat -- animal control Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2004 %% devil: i used to think i had plenty of food devil: now i realize that it has all expired over the last couple of years devil: except apparently wasabi and horseradish don't expire devil: so i have wasabi and horseradish -- devil aspiring to chefdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2004 %% Vanyel: get fun, new cursors! ABSOLUTELY FREE! Vanyel bangs head on desk janet: cursors! foiled again! -- janet deserving a smackdown Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 October 2004 %% Moni chuckles. Just got done with an intake appointment in which the pt gave me the finger twice. Moni bows. Moni: I'm doing such a good job. -- Moni's work here is done Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 October 2004 %% Xi: eibe meine emm schpinkey ed: if thats german for "dont' fuck with the BOFH" ed: I concur -- ed learning foreign languages Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 October 2004 %% Moni: hungry ed: appetite for destruction? Moni: ya Moni: big time Moni: or spicy broccoli tofu Moni: which ever is easier -- Moni, Destroyer of Worlds Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 October 2004 %% Vanyel: you drunkard lisa: i'm not a draunkard lisa: i'm just hapty -- drunklisa strikes again! Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2004 %% lisa: okay lisa: i'm sober lisa: i'm sorber marcie: lies lisa: no lisa: marccccccccccccccie DontKnow: lisa, are you sorbet too? lisa: i od notl liek lisa: lie lisa: lie lisa: see lisa: i can speel lisa: fuck -- drunklisa is our favorite! Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 October 2004 %% Vanyel: I am craving potato pancakes janet tempts leo with latkes marcie: must be getting close to hanukkah Vanyel: bad janet. Moni: mmm..latkes marcie: good janet. Moni: and applesauce Moni: mm marcie: and sour cream? Moni: and valium Moni: mmmm marcie: ahahaha marcie: it's definitely the holiday season Moni: yes -- the holidays are upon us again Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 October 2004 %% Moni: marcie: Your search - "death of a thousand cunts" - did not match any Moni: documents Moni chokes marcie: O:) Vanyel: that is no longer true. Vanyel: strangely enough, the only linkis to the en quote page... Moni: bwhahahaha marcie: imagine :) -- we at EN are so very proud Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 October 2004 %% dweez humps marcie marcie: WOO devil: i'm coming :) dweez: k marcie: wow marcie: that's impressive dweez: no shit devil: apparently at the sight of dweepie humping marcie marcie: he humps me, you come dweez: we own marcie: werd -- straight-on-gay action Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 October 2004 %% ed: dude ed: the amish fucking have it all ed: horses ed: buggies ed: no electricity ed: no phone ed: no computer ed: no pager ed: 8 children ed: slaves, if you will ed: women who listen ed: fuck man ed: there are amish about 5 miles from my house ed: and I want them to adopt me. -- ed longing for the simple life Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2004 %% marcie hums "uptown girl" janet: argh. marcie: :D marcie sings "uptown girl" at janet instead janet: ok, it's *stuck* now marcie: excellent. Xi: wow janet cranks up 'what a feeling' marcie retaliates with "oh sherrie" janet hums "oh danny boy" marcie whistles "sussudio" janet pulls out anything by maya angelou marcie: ooh marcie: you win marcie keeps sweet honey in the rock in reserve janet slowly puts down the grace jones album marcie: and back away slowly. -- janet and marcie battling it out Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2004 %% devil: i'm a girl, i'm not supposed to be getting this dirty with the computers devil: it's not fucking feminine -- devil the delicate flower Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 October 2004 %% devil: ethiopians have more food in their houses than i do -- devil complaining Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 November 2004 %% wob: FUCK THE POLICE Moni: mmm..only if I can use their handcuffs -- Moni, friend of the thin blue line Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 November 2004 %% Slayer: do we have anybody here who's actually killed somebody? Slayer: i think that's the only thing svaing us from hell Moni: define kill -- Moni the sweet & innocent Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 November 2004 %% lisa: my boobs get bigger each day -- lisa with medical problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 November 2004 %% devil: did you know that you can actually fit your whole hand into a german sheperd's vulva? -- devil again loving her job Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 November 2004 %% Moni hacks up a lung and places it on a silver platter with a sprig of parsley -- Moni, sick Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 November 2004 %% Vanyel: quick! to the googlemobile! -- Vanyel seeking information Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 November 2004 %% ed: can you see kernel.org ed: as in, go there ed: I can ping it Vanyel: cant http to it ed: good, I'm not alone ed: well, in a way I am, because you dont' find very many hermaphrodites with a penis on each knee -- ed with medical problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 November 2004 %% Moni: oh..I got my 5 year pin for surviving five years at Kaiser Moni: should come with morphine -- Moni the loyal and dedicated employee Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 November 2004 %% Slayer: goodmorning, social, intellectual, and moral inferiors. how are you all today? -- Slayer greeting his pals Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2004 %% Vanyel: pee Slayer: anybody want a strawberry daiquiri? Slayer: cept for vanyel Slayer: apparently he already has his drink Vanyel shits on slayer Slayer: and brekfast -- Slayer relaxing Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2004 %% Sarge: I'm surprised the chicks you date even are old enough to have boobs, that's why you like them so flat Slayer: i blame it all on playing D&D from age 6 and developing an elf fetish -- Slayer's odd habits Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2004 %% K: cocaine can lead to menage a trios -- K with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2004 %% K: so next year *** Sonic has entered room 'Main' K: me, you, maverick, and sonic Sonic: yo K: will all participate in the 14th annual Sonic: FUCKFEST -- sonic getting excited about the gay orgy Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 November 2004 %% janet: "An error occured during the file system check" janet: gee, thanks, linux marcie: you know you love the pain janet: even I'm not that much of a masochist ed: now, depending on FS size ed: await the pain of the check ed: I bet you lost a disk janet: whip me, beat me, make me admin crappy linux x86 boxes marcie: pain slut. janet: guilty janet: /dev/hda3: no such device janet pounds her head on the desk ed: hope you're packin spare disk ed: I too have felt this pain ed: and its searing janet: oh no no no no no no no no no marcie: that sounds bad. janet: no, it's just...whacked janet: oh frack, I know what's wrong janet: disks got swapped ed: you forgot the goat ed: the black goat ed: with the little redback spider tatoo on his left goat-asscheek janet: I don't have enough room for the thousand young janet tries to remember how to summon Shub-Niggurath ed: and the one who has a penis shaped like alan cox, and his beard janet: dude janet: you're scaring me marcie: congratulations, ed marcie: you have accomplished the nearly-impossible. ed: I am merely telling you what my linux-repair U-Haul contains ed: and one of those is a pigmy goat with a schlonce that looks like alan cox, with his beard ed: i call him Neville -- a disturbing rant Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 November 2004 %% meg: why does spybot give me butt stress -- meg, ill Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 November 2004 %% ed: damit ed: I think I stepped in bum shit -- ed on the way to work Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 November 2004 %% devil: we are such a sociable lot devil: janet is locking herself up on a room, ducky is driving to someplace idiots and full of shit, and ed is ed devil: i haven't left my hotel room all day janet is going to throw up any moment, so will bbiaf devil: granted, i've only been awake for a couple of hours devil: and vomiting, how ever could i forget the vomiting? *** janet is now known as janetafk -- devil enjoying our company Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 November 2004 %% janet: cool janet: our photocopier got 0wn3d :P Vanyel: what? Vanyel: how does ne haxx0r a photocopier? janet: it has a document feeder and an automatic scanner janet: ...which seem to be driven by something embedded that runs win2k :P janet: it lasted about a week and a half :) Vanyel: ahahahahahahahahahahahah -- janet's job Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 November 2004 %% meg: my fingers smell like burrito juice marcie: ... meg: you didn't know i was a lesburritan did you -- meg converting to the dark side Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 November 2004 %% janet flips through alt.suicide.holiday for 30 seconds to raise her spirits janet: it's somehow comforting to know that somewhere, there are people out there even dumber than my lusers. marcie: :D Xi: they seem to be everywhere Xi: like a plague of locust without the wonders of protein -- avoiding the herds of stupid Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 November 2004 %% *** janet has entered room 'Main' Vanyel: janet janet: could be Vanyel: I hope so, you're wearing her underwear janet: :P -- Vanyel flirting with janet Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 December 2004 %% saundo: oh dear god saundo: someone mention midgets, cuz I'm turning into a boring homeowner -- saundo going on about his house Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 2004 %% saundo: it's only a fetish if you don't talk about it -- saundo on sex Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 2004 %% Sarge: i love the internet.. marcie: lies Sarge: next to sex and wal-mart its' my favorite thing.. and when I'm not getting sex for a while its second behind wal-mart marcie: ahahahahah Sarge: hey wal-mart rocks -- Sarge heralding his roots Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 December 2004 %% Vanyel: SALESFUCK POWERS ACTIVATE! Vanyel: FORM OF: A P.O.! -- Vanyel the mighty SalesJew Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2004 %% Vanyel: i'm a busy lil salesfuck today Vanyel: i'm a little salesfuck, short and stout. Vanyel: here is my handle and here is my spout Vanyel: when you give me P.O.s here me shout Vanyel: HOT DOGSHIT I GOT MONEY#@$!#@$%#@%#@!$#@!%#@!4 marcie: ahahahhahah geesus christ leo Vanyel: what -- Vanyel bursting into song Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 December 2004 %% Vanyel: so janet, you wanna help me put headers on my beast then? janet: heh Vanyel: I did it once, on a VW janet: take a look at the distinctive lack of upper body strength :) janet: I'd be happy to sit on the fender holding a beer, give direction, and try to look nice, though Vanyel: I want you for your mind, not your body. marcie: rofl Vanyel: there you go janet: damnit leo -- janet & Vanyel bonding over cars Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 December 2004 %% marcie: BEATDOWN janet: ow marcie: not you. janet: yeah janet: but I did the 10.3.7 update and then my book slept marcie crawls in janet's lap and entertain her janet: USB was dead on wake :( marcie: ugh janet: um, hi. janet: :) marcie: :) janet tries to remember what Ms. Manners would do in a situation like this Moni: fondle marcie: yes marcie: what moni said janet: hee Moni: it would be rude to ignore such an invitation -- Moni with advice on good manners Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 December 2004 %% Sarge: how did I live w/o a dvd burner before this? Sarge: 4.7GB!! ___4.7GB!!!___ on one disc!! Sarge: and if I go buy double sided discs i get OVER 8GB!!! Moni: oh sweet..there's such a thing as double sided discs? Sarge: I want to kiss the little japanese man who invented these things -- Sarge with a DVD stiffy Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 December 2004 %% Moni: ok..off to tie up a man in a leotard -- Moni working Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 December 2004 %% janet hits 30 in another month and a half janet: maybe I need to get back into explosives or something -- janet realizing her mid-life crisis Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 December 2004 %% Vanyel: william shatner's got a new album out. devil: is that a joke? IGadget: its one in bad taste if it is -- Vanyel being funny Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 December 2004 %% ed: winamp has sucked for about 4 years ed: so ed: you get what you fucking get, leo. ed: winamp has evolved like the web-browser. ed: if I want my fucking MP3 player to make toast and rimjob my asshole, then I'll start clamoring for it. -- ed on mp3 players Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 January 2005 %% Xi: /clear marcie: no Xi: yes! Xi: do it NOW ed clears Xi ed: cept for that one charge, you know ed: sodomizing a pig ed: I can't get you off on that one dude. ed: this is Iowa Xi: the pig asked for it Lia: rofl Xi: twice ed: we take our pig-women seriously -- ed, farmer man Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 January 2005 %% devil: i think i'm losing my ability to tempt men devil: i was in bed with this guy for nearly 2 hours last night and he wouldn't shut up and get to the point -- devil having a hard time Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 January 2005 %% devil: so i shall give the boytoy another chance devil: and if his ass talks for two hours devil: i will just have to put something in his mouth as previously advised marcie: clearly Vanyel: mmm asthma attack devil: the mere thought has sent ducky into respiratory problems devil: i'm not THAT scary people -- devvy scaring us Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 January 2005 %% janet is wearing black and blood red today janet: it's a good day for someone else to die -- janet, Klingon warrior Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2005 %% Vanyel: ok what the hell is that weird part of the cat's ear, where it breaks out into like ...a big C ed: the ear ed: now, shut the fuck up, idiot -- ed the animal expert Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2005 %% Vanyel: okay Vanyel: whats the most voltage you've eaten? janet: um. janet: not counting the tesla coils? -- janet trying to understand the question Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2005 %% Vanyel: now noone answered my cat question Moni: what's the cat question? Vanyel: whats that weird part of the cat's ear near the head, where the skin breaks out into like a "C" Moni: the litlte ear flap thingy? Vanyel: yeah Moni: that's it Vanyel: its a flap thingy? Moni: yes Moni: :> Vanyel: I hate you guys. -- Vanyel not getting his questions answered Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2005 %% Vanyel tells his cat that there's catnip in ed's colon ed: /me takes the cat in upto the last ring on its tail ed pushes hard ed shits leo's cat inside out ed: AWAY WITH YOUR FELINE Moni: and some peopel think hamsters are kinky -- the crew getting kinky with it Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 January 2005 %% Vanyel: billy jean rocks and don't you forget it ok? :( :( :( -- Vanyel defending his taste in 80s music Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2005 %% Kestrel: swift and burning vengeance... Kestrel: it's good for the soul -- Kestrel with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2005 %% Vanyel: hrm Vanyel: theres something wrong with fuckedcompany.com Sarge: its fucked marcie: ironic, ain't it? -- Vanyel observing irony Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 January 2005 %% devil: el apartmento is most fabulous Jake: yo dev devil: though i'm getting sick of kgnu Jake: buy better speakers marcie: heh devil: they are pretty good speakers devil: they didn't pick up aberrant radio statiosn in nc devil: why are they picking them up here? Jake: because God hates you meg: your complex is built on radio personality burial grounds marcie: clearly devil: there is no god devil: meg must be right meg: it is sacred land devil: makes much more sense meg: they are haunting you -- devil's haunted computer speakers Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2005 %% Slayer: fucking conan the barbarian is the governor of california. someone's getting a special seat in the afterlife for that one. ed: special seat ed: or ed: special favors ed: like flames intermittently licking at their ballsack. Slayer: either -- California is doomed Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2005 %% Vanyel: today is "answer your email in gibberish" day *** skip has entered room 'Main' Vanyel: "Blinding lately! why horses hair sponge sunglasses????!!!" ed: Flailing chickens run by nugget tire iron heroin swimming pools. skip: I love coming in late :) most interesting statements -- skippy being entertained Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2005 %% Moni: Never pet your dog when it is on fire. Kestrel: things I should have known by now and did not -- Kestrel learning life lessons Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2005 %% *** lisa has entered room 'Main' lisa: helllllo Courtney: hey lisa Courtney: long time Courtney: hows waco? lisa: it's fantasti lisa: c lisa: and by fantastic i mean it's waco lisa: and by waco i mean i'm glad i drink -- drunklisa strikes again! Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 January 2005 %% devil: i'm ahead of qwest's game now ed: impossible ed: qwest has an ever changing playbook of pain ed: they have recently applied the spurs and blowtorch to my anus devil: first, i sound sweet and southern on the phone devil: so people want to help me devil: second, when sweet and southern doesn't work, i turn into a ranting bitch devil: and that works -- devil's technique Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2005 %% Moni: wife "You're drinking again?" Moni: Me "If you worke dwith alcoholics all day, you'd drink too" -- Moni loving her job Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2005 %% sunbeam: norton internet security and it says NEWALL1T.EXE is attmepting to connect to a DNS server sunbeam: and then it asks me what I wanna do sunbeam: i guess i'll just say ok Jake: have it make you a cocktail sunbeam: no shit sunbeam: MAKE ME A COCKTAIL DontKnow: hmm. It would be nicer if it would have given which dns server, or what host it was trying to lookup. DontKnow: I think that I'd have denied it Jake: did it work? Jake: did it know your favorite drink? sunbeam: no cocktail but i went and got myself a beer Jake: good enough Jake: problem solved! sunbeam: indeed -- sunbeam enabling, erm, empowering herself Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2005 %% devil: this is one of those work days where i wish the internet could be eradicated like a bad disease marcie: i have those days all the time devil: "well, i read on the internet that..." wob: heh devil: i read in weekly world news that a baby with 8 heads was born devil: doesn't mean i believe it -- devil enjoying her work Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2005 %% Vanyel: she likes cylindrical things, rachels lipstick, my isight, soda cans, my dick, etc Vanyel: dddddk marcie: YAH marcie: aahahahahah Vanyel: dddamn Vanyel: that should have been a /m Vanyel: you know, I couild explain myself Vanyel: but I think it'll be a lot cooler if I leave you all to wonder -- Vanyel being mysterious Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2005 %% ed: and now ed: a moment without ranting ed bows head ed: Ok, enough of that. twinkie: yes ed: I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE. -- ed taking a break Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2005 %% Kestrel: wtf Kestrel: might as blow Kestrel: my beloved mahsee is no where to be found Kestrel: oh how my heart aches to see her sweet sweet typing Kestrel: oh cruel cruel life Kestrel: how you torment me with toughts of what could have been Kestrel: if only Kestrel: if only I were 20 years younger Kestrel: if only I was a woman Kestrel: if only I were a moderately attractive women Kestrel: without a goatee Kestrel: ah well... Kestrel: cruel cruel life... *** Kestrel has left the room -- Kestrel in deepest pain Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2005 %% Al: wtf... Al: I do *not* recall putting chocolate in my pocket IGadget: are you sure its chocolate? -- IGadget cautioning Al Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2005 %% devil: pms is really starting to suck the older i get Moni: yes devil: my nipples are killing me Moni: death by nipples Moni: I can get into that -- Moni the mistress Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2005 %% devil: my electrical fields seem to be deranged today Moni: oh no...some conversations I just don't want to overhear. -- devil talking to the hand Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2005 %% janet: it's such a pain to get a decent caffeine intake when you can't handle acidic sodas or coffee janet: sucks marcie: you must invent a caffeine IV janet: I guess I could just take it straight, but I think people would get uneasy if I had a big pile of white powder on my desk -- janet being careful Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2005 %% DontKnow sneezes violently DontKnow: I hope nobody misses the ceiling. -- DK doing damage to his apartment Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 January 2005 %% Sarge: van, I wouldn't exactly say a cat and a child are the same.. Vanyel: yeah, children cant use the litterbox -- Vanyel considering a family Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 January 2005 %% MOni: so..this morning. I'm all horny and cuddly with the wife. Wife is in a playful, but non-horny mood MOni: She told me that if I could do 10 pushups, she'd have sex with me MOni: I dropped down and gave her 10 MOni: bam MOni: I impressed even myself MOni: but MOni: then I was to tired to have sex -- Moni shooting herself in the foot Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 January 2005 %% ed: the internet makes you stupid. -- ed with a warning Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2005 %% Moni: my goal for the day Moni: I will not kill anyone marcie: good goal Moni: no matter how much they deserve to die Moni: I will not rip their puny little head off and shove it up their urethra Moni: I will smile and nodd and look fucking theraputicly at them Moni: even if they are complete idiots -- Moni doing affirmations and setting goals Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2005 %% devil: they should be happy that i'm working out of the office devil: i always want to kill the stupid people Lia: stupid people should be beaten until morale improves devil: my morale would improve more fully if i was the one beating them -- devil at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 February 2005 %% Slayer: i just had a conversation with a box of goldfish devil: you have issues -- Slayer going mad Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 February 2005 %% Manuka: fucking hell Manuka: what part of "go fuck yourselves" does Centex Home Equity not understand? marcie: the part where you don't pay them money -- marcie with financial advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 2005 %% *** Sarge has entered room 'Main' Sarge: wake up little susie wake up Vanyel: no. Sarge: you're still up? Sarge: wow Sarge: at least I can use the excuse that I just got done running a code on a dead woman -- Sarge at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 2005 %% meg: well there's a subsection of news i don't read at all anymore meg: political shit meg: but when i read about a couple who gets turned down for a day care licence and they get mad about it and want to sue the state but they were rejected becasue, get this meg: THEY'RE BOTH BLIND meg: wtf, blind people should just not be running a daycare marcie: gee meg: common sense, people marcie: i can't imagine why they got turned down meg: but nooo meg: they're gonna waste our tax dollars suing the state meg: for a common sense decision meg: as in "sight is a common sense and YOU DON'T HAVE IT" marcie: ahahahahahah -- meg on a rant Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 February 2005 %% janet: was my bday today (yesterday now I guess) Slayer: happy birthday if i didn't say it before janet: 30, guess it's time to let go of some of those dreams Slayer: never janet: I guess I'll probably never be wiggling on the hood of a car in a music video :P Slayer: you can never tell Slayer: i promise if i ever make a video that has a girl wiggling on the hood of a car, it'll be you janet: thanks, that's sweet -- janet with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2005 %% Al: there used to be a computer wholesaler called Ameriquest Al: Seneca bought them 4 years ago Slayer: the apple juice people? Al: Seneca Data Distributors, Inc Al: my employer. Slayer: oh Slayer: there's a seneca what deals in fruit juice here Al: you should read the labels -- Slayer confused about his purchases Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2005 %% Slayer: do you realize how easy it is to kill someone if you can remove their skull first? -- Slayer making plans Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2005 %% devil: marcie, did i mention to you that i have new cheap but cute wine glasses that each hold an entire bottle of wine? marcie blinks marcie: my god, woman marcie: marry me. devil: you have not a built in penis marcie: alas. devil: otherwise, i would say absolutely devil: but i will drink with another woman out of wedlock marcie: slut ;) devil: is this a problem? ;) marcie: not at all :D devil: fabulous :) -- devil and marcie loving on each other Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2005 %% janet: heh janet: this had damn well better get me an interview :) devil: stripping again? janet: hmph janet: it's exotic dancing, thank you -- janet working up her resume Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 February 2005 %% devil: is it sinful to love one's mac more than one's father/ marcie: no devil: phew, glad to hear it -- devil reserving her spot in hell Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 February 2005 %% janet does soy sauce shots janet: damn salt craving -- janet having urges Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 February 2005 %% marcie: http://www.bmezine.com/tattoo/A50122/high/bmegl010954.jpg marcie: look at this sad motherfucker right here. janet: ow ow ow ow ow janet: it burns marcie: hee Slayer: heh janet: bill gates had better be personally giving him a blow job out of frame marcie: yeah, no shit janet: *shakes head* marcie: the mac addicts with apple logos on them are bad enough janet: heh marcie: but that's just damn sad right there meg: i was wondering what the mark of the beast would turn out to be -- the crew regarding a Microsoft tattoo Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2005 %% janet: fiiiiiiiiive golllllden patch cables -- janet singing a little song Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2005 %% twinkie: so want to hear something insane twinkie: yet boring Moni: sure janet: story of my life -- janet's exciting times Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 February 2005 %% justice: hmmmm I was married to an Al once justice: I told you that one time too justice: but he died Al: my condolences. justice: no biggee, he was a jerk Al: oh Al: then screw him justice: right on -- justice moving on with her life Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 February 2005 %% janet: rgh marcie: yeah marcie: that janet: yeah janet: but I have chocolate marcie: very good. devil sits beside of janet devil looks cute janet ponders devil looks worthy of chocolate janet looks sideways at devvy marcie sidles up to janet janet: mm hmm marcie bats her eyes janet slams her 1lb bar on the desk a few times to break it up and passes it around wob: sluts marcie faints -- janet and her harem Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 February 2005 %% Vanyel: da,nit ed Vanyel: fuck Vanyel: a day off and my vanyelitis swells up to the size of my hemmheroid -- Vanyel, ill Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 February 2005 %% Vanyel: drinky. Vanyel chews on his kittens ear -- the perils of alcohol Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 February 2005 %% wob: mmm crashy crashy firefox Jake: loser janet: thereeeee's *NO*zilla like *MO*zilla there's *NO*zilla I know... janet: -- janet with a little song Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 February 2005 %% Vanyel: hey lia Vanyel: I got a dumb biology question for you cuinhell: the penis goes into the vagina Vanyel: ahh Vanyel: that explains it. Vanyel: I was too busy waiting for the vagin to become erect. cuinhell: glad to be of ASSistance Vanyel: Rachel will be pleased now that I have this figured out -- Vanyel figuring out the facts of life Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 March 2005 %% Nekkid: yup..i's 3:45pm on a Tuesday and I'm nekkid with a beer watchign Time Cops Nekkid: I AM WHITE TRASH Nekkid: hear me burp -- Moni celebrating her roots Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 March 2005 %% ed: have you been huffing gasoline again? Kestrel: worse ed: jakes socks? -- ed taking precautions Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2005 %% cuinhell: I CAN'T FEEL MY BALLS! -- cuinhell having problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 March 2005 %% janet: do not mock the hormonal, for they are subtle, quick to anger, and will kick your ass. -- janet having her period Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2005 %% sunbeam: so what wonderful things would we accomplish if men put half as much effort into problem solving as they do whining? sunbeam: probably more robots janet: hm janet: ending war? Vanyel: hrm, I dunno, electricity, penecillin, motor cars, washing machines, lightbulbs, television, computers, phones sunbeam: so basically nothing new? janet: ROFL -- sunbeam requiring information Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2005 %% Al: a very stupid reason why I can not completely assemble this bawx tonight Al: I have run out of heatsink grease. :( cuinhell: use some of the mansauce you dropped when you started Al: that stuff stinks when it warms up -- Al needing supplies Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 March 2005 %% Lia: I got the sound on my DVD player to work Lia: yay DontKnow: that's good Lia: the ironic thing is the only movie I have left to watch is a silent movie -- Lia having issues Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 March 2005 %% sunbeam: she voted for gwb though, she's a goddamn idiot anyway sunbeam: ugh..why didn't my parents stop when they had me sunbeam: she's totally vile sometimes *** cu-sleep is now known as cuinhell cuinhell: it's not too late to smother her with a pillow -- sunbeam's sister Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 March 2005 %% janet mutters the deadliest joke in the world *** firl has been disconnected Lia: heh -- Janet the dangerous one Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 March 2005 %% firl: i just realized i have job security firl: no one else knows how to change our after hours phone message -- firl the Librarianatrix Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 March 2005 %% twinkie: 6u know twinkie: you* twinkie: pills and booze rock twinkie: i have no shame -- twinkie the glamorous diva Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 March 2005 %% janet: after my wisdom teeth were out, there I was, popping vicodin like there was no tomorrow, sometimes rinsing my mouth out with brandy as a topical anaesthetic janet: well, sipping it janet: listening to old mellow music and thinking, "gawd, I feel like liz taylor in her down periods" :) twinkie: without the excess weight -- janet the glamorous diva Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 March 2005 %% Lia: gah Lia: I still ned to cut 30 words out of this abstract firl: take out all the prepositions -- fir the Librarianatrix being helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 March 2005 %% Jake: mmmm Jake: coffee kicking in Jake: wtf Jake: whoah I'm at work! -- Jake waking up Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 March 2005 %% Vanyel: head hurts firl kicks van's shin. Vanyel: head and shin hurts -- Vanyel in pain Eagle's Nest BBS, 30 March 2005 %% meg: godDAMN FINALLY meg: BITCH DED ed: now the 2.5 hours of national healing can begin. ed: watch CNN for details on you local mourning place ed: candles to be provided by Yankee Candle Co. meg: ahahahah -- the crew on Terry Schiavo Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 March 2005 %% twinkie: i had a dumbass dream Vanyel: what about? twinkie: all i did was call my stylist to see if i could hyelights in my hair twinkie: why the fuck would i dream that? twinkie: why cant i have some perverted orgy dream?? twinkie: instead of fuggin hyelights? twinkie: i don't even want hightlights -- twinkie's subconscious Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 March 2005 %% janet skims "the fall of the house of usher" for a brief motivational moment -- janet at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 March 2005 %% Moni: cat sitting on laptop Moni moves cat Moni: cat's upset -- Moni having pussy problems Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 April 2005 %% sunbeam: i'm going to get some cowboy boots sunbeam: i'll wear them responsibly -- sunbeam being responsible Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 April 2005 %% *** Moni is now known as Macamoni marcafk: hee *** marcafk is now known as marcie sunbeam: mmm macamoni Macamoni covers herself with cheese sauce Vanyel: oh god janet: yum sunbeam: haha Vanyel: i'm hungry and horny now marcie: ahahahah sunbeam: hahaha Macamoni giggles -- Vanyel with a carb fetish Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 2005 %% janet starts pricing 155mm howitzer shells twinkie: my my twinkie: why? janet: I'm having some negative feelings about my work environment cuinhell: HAHAHAAAHA cuinhell: that's a way to put it. janet: well, work is ok, just not one of the coworkers :P janet: and, why make a statement when you can make a crater, you know? twinkie: true -- janet making, erm, a statement Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 April 2005 %% firl: "what services will you offer to our new foreign visually impared student" firl: fuck if i know janet: um firl: i'm not reading to him, i'll tell you that much janet: multicultural braille porn? firl: i don't want anyone getting all honry in the library touching those raised dots Vanyel: mmm raised dots. firl: see what i'm talking about? -- firl at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 April 2005 %% sunbeam: when i put my head down on my desk it sounds like the ocean ed: thats just echoing from inside your head. -- ed being sweet Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 April 2005 %% sunbeam: isaac LOVED nemo by the way sunbeam: and we just watched brother bear and he loved that one too meg: reservoir dogs sunbeam: he likes movies with animals meg: that's a good movie for toddlers sunbeam: too violent meg: it's got dogs in the title -- meg, helpful Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 April 2005 %% cuinhell: i think i'm turning japanese. Lia: that could get interesting Lia: are you just getting shorter, or developing a taste for anime tentacle porn? cuinhell: i already had a taste for tentacle porn Lia: somehow I figured that -- cuinhell, a man of taste Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 April 2005 %% china: i was just watching the discovery channel, and there was this lady on there with a baby. This lady had no arms china: isn't child rearing hard enough WITH arms? china: not to mention the terrifying inability to masturbate effectively janet: ergh. janet: aye, there's the rub janet: or not china: exactly -- china discovering a new horror Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2005 %% china: hmmm, my cats are dragging around a pillow three times their size china: right now, Xander is half under this gigantic pillow janet: ahah china: looking at me like it's the most natural thing in the world janet: well janet: cats always have a subtle plan for world domination janet: but when you sleep 14 hours a day, it's hard to make progress on that -- janet on cats Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2005 %% Vanyel: but I have a "doctors appointment" tomorrow Vanyel: err job interview cuinhell: hahaha firl: :) firl: and i'm sure you've never looked so good for your doctor cuinhell: well, good luck on a positive "exam" cuinhell: careful if they go rectal. -- Vanyel gearing up for an interview Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2005 %% *** Lia has entered room 'Main' Lia: Ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny Lia: and that's all I have to say firl: i'm glad one of us can say it -- firl having trouble Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2005 %% cuinhell: i bet i can trow a football over tha tmountain range! Vanyel: I bet I can fart and knock my cat ofer -- Vanyel's impressive colon Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2005 %% firl: sometime around 4 am, one of my cats rummaged around in the garage, pulled out a glove for gardening and dragged it into the bedroom to play firl: when you wake up in the morning and the first thing you see is a gardening glove you start to wonder what sort of night you had -- firl living it up Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2005 %% Lia: I went over to the graham center for lunch Lia: saw Mickey and Minnie Mouse, Goofy, and Win nie the Pooh wandering around Lia: must remember to use the fume hood more often -- Lia the mad chemist Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 April 2005 %% Vanyel: I need to invent a way to punch people in the mouth via th einternet -- Leo the inventor Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 April 2005 %% janet: grmph janet: why is it so fecking hard to add page numbers to a ps programmatically Moni: you need a sharpie janet: yeah janet: 1500+ pages though firl: a few sharpies janet: maybe I should jsut get an undergrad janet: they're disposable marcie: yes firl tosses janet one of her student workers janet: can they collate? firl: likely firl: you might need to whip them occasionally for encouragement janet: awesome janet: I could get into that firl: they seem to like it marcie: i miss having student workers janet: I still have carbon paper stains from decollating/bursting 7-part greenbar marcie: little minions to do my bidding and cater to my every whim firl: oh, ok marcie. you can have one too marcie sighs nostalgically marcie: aw thanks firl: although, one of mine quit firl: so i'm running low marcie: kick it marcie: sometimes that works -- the geeks and their toys Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 April 2005 %% Moni: stupid kaiser fuckheads went through my computer and deleted any non-kaiser approved programs Moni: like..the oh, so dangerous Firefox marcie: heh *** Moni has been disconnected *** Moni has entered room 'Main' Moni: coincidence that I just got kicked off EN? Moni: I think not Moni: FUCKTARDS! firl: they're on to you *** Moni has been disconnected marcie: ahahahahhaa -- Moni fighting The Man Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2005 %% sunbeam: i'm obsessed with vintage potties -- sunbeam's toilet habits Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 May 2005 %% Vanyel: edbucket ed: sup baby ed: you been all aquiver thinking about me? Vanyel: no Vanyel: just constipated ed: same thing -- the boys loving on each other Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 May 2005 %% Moni: ohg man...I have a screening appointment wiht a pt who is alcoholic, schizophrenic, obsessive-compulsive and has tourettes. Moni bangs her head ed: kick fukcing ass! ed: can you webcast that ofr us? firl: sounds like a handful Moni: just shoot me now -- Moni having fun at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 May 2005 %% cuinhell: i had a pet rat named fuckstick in HS Kestrel: how did they tell you apart? cuinhell: the rat wouldn't shit in your hand -- cuinhell's pets Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 May 2005 %% ed: why couldn't she have tripped and fallen into a chipper shredder with a liquid nitrogen pre-processing unit, which was all sitting next to a hog lot full of hungry sows? Moni: wow ed..got some pent up rage there? Vanyel: why couldnt her mom have a 30th month abortion? ed: yes! Vanyel: ed's mom chased him around the house with a vaccum cleaner for YEARS ed: the 32 month abortive event Vanyel: now he knows why ed: don't taunt me ed: baldy ed: you'll force me to do something neither of us will like Vanyel: like what, take a shower? ed: when I figure that out, I'll let you know -- the boys loving on each other Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 May 2005 %% Slayer: i bet sunbeam would go to prom with me firl: are you getting a hotel room for afterwards? Slayer: i wouldn't take her back to some hotel room. she's a lady. Vanyel: slay'd do her in the limo Slayer: we'd do it on the hood of the car. Vanyel: I was close. wob: hahaha firl: yeah, then she'll definitely go with you wob: Slayer is all class. firl: he's got a flash of MadDog 20/20, too firl: its a special occasion firl: flask Slayer: and a pack of swishers firl: yeah! cuinhell: a bottle of strawberry hill and some moonpies firl: how could a girl say no to *that* cuinhell: few can! Vanyel: fabby: easy firl: moonpies? wine from boonehill? come on leo Vanyel: she opens her mouth, presses her tongue right behind her teeth and vocalizes. Quickly after that, she opens her mouth into a round shape, with her tongue down, and vocalizes again firl: har har cuinhell: cover your ears abby, the man is crazy firl: well, we all knew that anyway Vanyel: which man cuinhell: YOU sunbeam: yum who's got moonpies Vanyel: ok good cuinhell: SEE! firl: see?? Vanyel: if you called Slay a man, 'd have been hurt sunbeam: what? -- Slayer & sunbeam, sitting in a tree Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 May 2005 %% Moni just left a clinical meeting because the therapists in the meeting coudln't stop yelling at each other long enough to discuss patients! Moni: fucking unbelieveable marcie: nice Moni: we teach communication skills and empathtic listening Moni: but apparently can't practice it Moni: geezus firl: have you tried group therapy? Moni: we've tried Moni: the facilitator left crying -- Moni's hardcore co-workers Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 May 2005 %% saundo: it's not a morning if there's no gerbil wedged in someone's ass -- saundo waking up Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 2005 %% saundo: hrm. i wonder if Office 12 offers the rumored microsoft dual headed credit card interface and 8" wide butt plug saundo: so they can ask: where do you want to be violated today? saundo: as opposed to todays clunky interface of a meat grinder attached to your cock saundo: which is in the Adminpak for Office 10 -- saundo pondering Microsoft's new products Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 May 2005 %% Vanyel: is EVERYONE sick? marcie: no sunbeam: i'm not sick, just nauseous Slayer: i'm not sick sunbeam looks at slay Slayer: well Slayer: you know what i mean -- Slayer the sicko Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 May 2005 %% sunbeam: i hate it when people ask me the same question 9 times phrased in different ways sunbeam: it's like they know i haven't had any coffee sunbeam: and they're trying to trick me -- sunbeam at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 June 2005 %% janet: a weber grill, a charcoal briquette, a trussed-up luser, 10gal of liquid oxygen and thou... marcie: you're so romantic -- janet charming marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 June 2005 %% Slayer: aww, vic and i just took a "what romantic movie is your love life most like" quiz and we both got "my big fat greek wedding" *** firl has entered room 'Main' meg: bill, that's kinda lame Slayer: you're lame meg: no you are Slayer: no your mom is meg: well that's true Slayer: i win -- meg and Slayer having a slap fight Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 June 2005 %% ed: I'm 30 in july ed: and I'm gonna get drunk and rape a goat Slayer: why not do something new, ed -- ed celebrating Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 June 2005 %% Slayer: http://www.weirdspot.com/images/uploads/monkeycock.jpg firl: ok i'm not falling for that link. Slayer: heh, it's just a monkey penis firl: "just a monkey penis" Slayer: it's cute Vanyel: I'm scared. -- Slayer and his unnatural animal love Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 June 2005 %% Moni: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and Moni: huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them. janet: hm janet: this will change the dynamics of elder care for sure -- contemplating the future Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 June 2005 %% ed: I can tell already that this isn't an Iowa City job ed: it's a cedar rapids job ed: which means commute by car. ed: I am not to be interested in that. firl: Iowa is like 5 miles across. suck up and deal marcie: ahahahah ed: my balls you may tonguewash ed: Iowa is like 380 miles across, I know, because I've ridden it. firl: i shall pass on that opportunity ed: not all of us choose to live in a god-forsaken shithole with longhorn steers and conservatives ed: and people who drag homosexuals behind pickuptrucks firl: we only do that on special holidays -- firl on Texass Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 June 2005 %% Moni: oh Moni: oh Moni: no Moni: Jury fucking duty firl: uh oh! janet: yoinks sunbeam: yikes Moni bangs her head Moni: my boss is going to LOVE this firl: you love jury duty moni Moni: I just get back after being gone for 2 weeks and now I have jury duty next week Moni: my poor patients firl: heh firl: maybe you'll get excused Moni: ya firl: "um, my patients NEED me" Moni: I'll go in there wearing my "HI! I'm a Rehab Sex Worker Dyke Liberal Army Wife Psychologist" T-shirt firl: oh totally firl: it will be hard to find a peer you will be a juror for Moni: and I'm REALLY CRAZY! Moni: WOO! -- Moni doing her civic duty Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 2005 %% wob: i dont remember much after that night wob: except the phrase 'boobie vindaloo' -- wob living the high life Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 June 2005 %% janet: you know how cords thrown in one box will automatically tangle, just on their own? janet: like some kind of bizarre electric mating ritual? janet: we need the equivalent of hair conditioner marcie: cable conditioner marcie: i like it firl: when they tangle, in our house, you get to sing the "cable box blues" song we've made up firl: it works best if you have a harmonica -- firly the musicianatrix Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 2005 %% janet: i broke into my dodge once using a zip tie, a pair of sony headphones and a straw -- janet the lockpick Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 June 2005 %% firl: i got trombone porn spam once firl: can't figure that one out janet: nice janet: I think french horns get me hotter tho firl: yeah, i could agree with that too -- the hawtness of spam Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 June 2005 %% sunbeam: i think of librarians as kind of like book archaeologists Beastie: i think of librarians as porn stars firl: me too marcie: don't we all -- bow chicka BOW bow Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2005 %% firl: motherfucking students need to stop arguing with me marcie: YEAH firl: some dick wasted 15 minutes of my time because he doesn't want to pay 7 dollars firl: dude pay the fucking 7 dollars Vanyel: tell him that your time is worth 7 dollars a minuite marcie: at least firl: he wanted to talk to the person in charge firl: which was me :) firl: so he got angrier firl: and now he's emailing my supervisor firl: whee marcie: awesome firl: oh and faxing our "fines appeals committee" - also ME firl: he's screwed. firl: i might charge him 7 more dollars marcie: ahahahahahahha -- firly the Librarianatrix strikes again Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 July 2005 %% Vanyel: I want to work for a company that kills people. -- Vanyel looking for a job Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 July 2005 %% ed: I need a handjob and a slappin around by some tittehs wob: tatas! ed: fuckin nap Jake: stooopid DNC wob: dirty pillows! ed: if there are tatas to hit your face ed: who *needs* a nap Jake: hahahahah ed: tho ed: if I want tatas to hit my face, I need to shave my stubble Jake: a nap would be nice afterwords Jake: the nap of contentment! Vanyel: ok i am gonna go eat ed: limp and drained ed: with a song in your heeart wob: and a handful of spooge devil: a song in your heart? devil: has ed lost all testosterone? ed: yea, don't you have, uh, like the theme song from The Running Man in your heart after a good lay? wob: hahahaah wob: ok ed wob: weirdo devil: um, no Jake: hahahaha ed: uh ed: the song from Dallas? Or Mcgyver? ed: nothing? ed: cold? devil: depends on how good it was ed: right -- ed, music lover Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 2005 %% janet: I could come by and cheer you up janet: though I may not have enough explosives for that -- janet consoling Leo Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 2005 %% Vanyel: ill see you in an hour or so then? janet: yah janet: driving like I stole it Vanyel: did you? janet: well janet: no janet: mostly -- janet being all shifty Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 July 2005 %% ed: anything for allah, anything for allah. marcie: ALLAH ACKBAR wob: DURKAH DURKAH JIHAD JIHAD MUHHAMAD ed: MALABA HAMBA LABA W W W W W Alfred E Neuman LABA LABA BABA CLINTON-DYKE BABALABA HAMA ed fires AK47 into the air marcie: rofl wob: hehehe ed: ABKLABHABABLAB! marcie: i love all y'all marcie: you big freaks -- the EN Jihad Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 2005 %% Beastie: i did laundry today and i have 8 pairs of camo shorts and 15 black tshirts and 12 blue tshirts Beastie: i should really develop some fashion sense -- Beastie the metrosexual Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 July 2005 %% wob: i dont know how those dumbasses got out of the vehicle and took off that fast meg: so unless the car was stolen and they were wearing gloves, i think they'll get caught wob: yeah wob: pretty fucked up meg: well adrenaline can make people run fast meg: and i still think it was a young man driving wob: yah meg: so i'm sure he was ready to hoof it anyway wob: they were moving damn fast wob: from the pic that i saw in the news it looks like they headed straight into the house wob: didnt bother at all to try and make the corner wob: they had to be drunk/high/etc sunbeam: what if it turned out to be two soccer moms out whooping it up together and they got a little crazy meg: pretty much wob: hahaaha wob: that would be funny meg: that'd be damn silly wob: just came back from the local yuppie bar meg: they were all "yeah let's go thelma and louise all down this residential street whoopee" sunbeam: yeah with a bunch of other soccer moms marcie: that would be awesome wob: smashed on their favorite bottle of reisling marcie: hahahahha marcie: SOCCER MAMAS REPRESENT sunbeam: hahaha they split a 4 pack of wine coolers and got crazy marcie: HAHAHHAHAA meg: forensics will find a barry manilow cd in the car cd player wob: hahahaha meg: turned up to ELEVEN wob: YEAH wob: BASS POUNDING marcie: singing along to "Copacabana" sunbeam: yeah right they were probably listening to the Wiggles marcie: HER NAME WAS LOLA marcie: SHE WAS A SHOWGIRL wob: hahha wob: AT THE COPA wob: COPACABANA -- on an SUV crashing into a house in Denver Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 2005 %% sunbeam: i'm leaving in 10 minutes for my starbucks interview marcie: goodl uck marcie: or good luck, whichever sunbeam: hehe sunbeam: thanks marcie: "goodl uck", of course, is a traditional lesbian saying to wish one well marcie: i share my culture with you because i care sunbeam: how do you say 'thank you' in traditional lesbian? marcie: 'than kyou' marcie: you're practically bilingual now sunbeam: hahaha awesome sunbeam: maybe i can use that in my interview marcie: :D sunbeam: to show how multitalented I am marcie: you know it -- sunbeam the multi-talented Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 July 2005 %% devil: marcie devil: i'm bad, come spank me marcie: ooh marcie: i'll be right over marcie: now what am i spanking you for, again? devil: sweet devil: cuz i'm bad :) devil: is that not enough? marcie: well marcie: yes marcie: i suppose it is marcie: *spankSPANKspankSPANKspank* devil moans delightedly firl: oh hey. um, I'm bad too. ;) marcie: werd marcie spanks firly too marcie: *spankSPANKspankSPANKspank* firl: ohhhh yeah marcie: boy, i'm living moni's dream firl: hehe marcie: it's too bad she's not here marcie: okay marcie: now janet fires a rubber band into marcie's hair firl: when she gets back i'll let her have a turn marcie: firly and devvy spank each other! marcie gets the video camera marcie spanks janet too marcie: marcie: werd devil spanks firly marcie: *spankSPANKspankSPANKspank* marcie: *spankSPANKspankSPANKspank* marcie: *spankSPANKspankSPANKspank* devil spanks marcie marcie: WOO devil: erm, i know you aren't a bad girl, just got caught up in the spanking moment marcie: yeah marcie: that devil: i'm not a good spanker devil: i like to squeeze bottoms devil: squeezing makes not a good spanker marcie: that works too devil squeezes marcie's bottom marcie: you can practice on me marcie: YEAH -- SpankFest '05 Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 July 2005 %% janet: we almost had an incident when moving janet: sebastian dumped out a film can filled with perchlorate flash powder Kestrel: yikes janet: yeah janet: but janet: there's nothing explosive in the new place at all janet: I feel kind of empty -- janet after moving Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 July 2005 %% Lia: dry ice is so much fun to play with *** guest has entered room 'Main' guest: wooooo *** guest has been disconnected Lia: ok... Beastie: i want some dry ice Beastie: mail mne some Lia: you can buy it at the store ya know Beastie: i never said i wanted to pay for it -- Beastie angling for a freebie Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2005 %% ed: sucky sucky wob: workie workie ed: yea *** marcfk is now known as marcie Beastie: i have to work for 2 hours today ed: suck and work come from the same root marcie: feh ed: "pain" -- ed the linguist Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2005 %% firl: i just milked a goat marcie: ... firl: http://www.austinzoo.org/kids/milk.html marcie: what kind of library *do* you run? Moni sighs and mops up diet coke off her keyboard firl: virtually! firl: actually, i would milk a goat, if i had the chance. Moni: I have milked a goat firl: was it all you ever hoped it would be? Moni: yes..and strangly unsatisfying janet: for you or the goat? Moni: I think I need to try milking a cow Moni: heh janet firl: you think that would be more satisfying? Moni: I think the goat is traumatized Moni: well firl....size matters, ya know firl: ah firl: i thought that was a rumor wob: milking a goat is cool firl: figures you would have, wob wob: baaaaah Moni: goddammit firl wob: and it wasn't male! Moni: I'm not drinking any more fluids firl: ok i'll stop :P Moni giggles firl: it's just.. i'm working on item records at work and they're boring Moni: milking a male goat Moni: is Moni: just Moni: icky firl: it wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for these sound effects janet: depends on if there's electricity involved -- farm talk Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2005 %% Moni: i have never masturbated a farm animal -- Moni pleading innocence Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2005 %% janet tries to remember 9 years ago janet: it's all a blur of republicans and meat -- janet having flashbacks Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 July 2005 %% *** Beastie has entered room 'Main' Beastie: morning Slayer: hi dassin: hmmm.. do I know beastie? Beastie: hopefully not Beastie: i already hate enough people -- Beastie, sociable Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 August 2005 %% wob: all i need is some more caffine wob: and I'll be able to kill people through cube walls just by staring -- wob, angry about work Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 August 2005 %% *** Torgo has entered room 'Main' Torgo pops in for the obligatory once-every-6-months-EN-chat. Lia: hi Torgo: Heyo. :) wob: nothings changed wob: you can leave now greg ;) Torgo: *Phew* Thanks wob. :) wob: hehe anytime Torgo: See everyone next year! *** Torgo has left the room -- Torgo checking in Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 August 2005 %% wob: so for those ppl who are clausterphobic wob: this is not for them wob: :) wob: I'm sure i butcherd that word wob: and that one wob: im on a roll firl: spelling is for the weak -- firl the Librarianatrix schooling wob Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 August 2005 %% devil: i swear, i will never again be golf beer bitch in a white shirt for six hot guys in a rain storm devil: though it was sweet of the boys to keep giving me updates on how cold i was -- devvy's solemn vow Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 August 2005 %% Moni: i was at the airport last night in baggage claim and some guy standing next to me was calling out to his father. Moni: "Hey Richard...Richard!! RICHARD Moni: Hey DICK! Moni: finally father turned around at Dick devil: that's probably what my dad would answer to as well devil: and his name is carl :) -- devvy loves her daddy Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 August 2005 %% china: REAL WOMEN MASTURBATE! -- china, a real woman Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2005 %% wob: so close to ditching work wob: boss is not here wob: manager is gone wob: half of the dept is gone marcie: do it Moni: ditch Moni: go marcie: DO IT Moni: it's friday Moni: go home wob: I love you guys. wob: :) Moni: we have a great work ethic wob: fuck yeah wob: I probably will at 1pm Moni: well..marcie does at least wob: hahaha marcie: ha Moni: I'm a lazy ass -- wob being corrupted Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2005 %% Moni: I've figured out (finally) how to turn off my phone Moni: it doesn't even go to voice mail wob: hahahaa Moni: :> wob: you threw it didnt you marcie: awesome wob: in the lake wob: against a wall wob: etc Moni: well..kinda marcie: pager toss! marcie: ahh, the memories. Moni: pounded it on the desk wob: there we go -- Moni learning technology Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2005 %% wob: dude. we're talkinga bout debauchery. firl: hehe wob: that's worth doing. wob: most things arent ;) firl: ok true janet: hah janet: damn right janet: I could use some about now marcie deflowers janet firl: whoa janet drops her pen marcie: ahahah wob: yeah firl: good times! wob: I'm not in the right frame of mind to watch that one yet, hold on a few secs wob: ;) janet laffs marcie: ahahahahhahahaa -- wob getting warmed up Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 August 2005 %% Moni: I always carry a big yello rocked shaped dildo in my back pocket -- Moni the rocket scientist Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 August 20055 %% janet: I'm trying to make peace with my tummy janet: it's still not on speaking terms with me firl hands janet a tums and some pretzels janet: tums heck, I think I need a team of diplomats and a hostage exchange -- janet's tummy Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2005 %% Vanyel suddenly realises rachel used the last of the toilet paper in my bathroom janet: ah, young love -- janet, nostalgic Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2005 %% Vanyel: ooh Vanyel: google now offers jabber Instant messaging Vanyel: right on cuinhell: because the world needs MORE ways to IM ed: yea ed: just who I want my imchat goiing through Vanyel: well jabber supports ssl ed: fucking google ed: I trust google with anything about as far as I trust amazon ed: they'll change the rules when it's ultra profitable to do so ed: my gmail accounts get CC's of all of the mail that my spam filters trap cuinhell: free searchable archives of all your hot netsexoring! ed: DATA MINE THAT FUCKERS cuinhell: Google Search: donkey + finger in ass cuinhell: Search returned 60000000 conversations ed: GoogleIMSearch: I'm only 13 too! Vanyel: ahahaha ed: Search returned 5400505555 conversations 1000000 abductions wob: hahhahaah wob: oh man wob: i'll do IM now that google has it wob: so I ca n talk about donkeys and goats wob: sheep of course wob: velcro gloves wob: double wide boots for both hoof and foot. ed: yes ed: the right temperature to prewarm the lube wob: totally -- the geeks IM'ing Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 August 2005 %% ed: so once again ed: Shrub is dirverted from War on Terroah! ed: natural disaster will hide his next several scandals. ed: and the rising cost of fuel. ed: I think people may get really pissed when they see huge defence spending, plus high fuel, plus high taxes, plus dead bodies Slayer: with bush in charge you get all 4 in one ed: is that like being double-holed plus having cheney shove his diseased low-pressure member in your ear while Karl Rove tries to wedge his way into your left pocket? Slayer: sausage wob: hahhah ed: a 4 in one ed: 4 fumbling republicans Slayer: 3 freedom hens ed: 2 ravens of war ed: and a terrorist in a plan! ed: on the 5th day of the war on terrah my fearless xtian leader gave to me! ed: 5 DOLLAR GAS! ed: 4 fumbling replubicans wob: LET IT RISE LET IT RISE wob: I'm so happy for this ed: 3 freedom hense ed: 2 ravens of war ed: and A TERRORIST WITH A PLAN -- The 12 Days of Gas Wars 31 August 2005 %% soney: EN we believe is obliterated as the box was obliterated in gulfport soney: anyway soney: see ya *** soney has left the room janet: requiescant in pace, EN. marcie: yeah. wob: ahahahah wob: awesome. marcie: as i said this morning marcie: what a way to go ;) wob: it had a good run ;) wob: totally! wob: Now THATS a way to go down! marcie: free EN memorial tattoos all around! ;) Moni: well..thas'good news Moni: the box is down Moni: there ya go Marcie ... firl: where do i sign up for my EN memorial tattoo? Vanyel: what about EN now what did I miss? Moni: it's sunk firl: glug glug glug Vanyel: figured. Vanyel: goddamnit my fridge froze my lunch Vanyel: brb wob: hahaha wob: glug glug glug glug wob: that is so awesome. wob: I am so proud. wob: I am sharing that knowledge with people at work wob: it took a fucking hurricane to take out our goddamn bbs wob: i had email back from '92 on there too :) firl: awww wob: no biggie wob: i never look at it firl: but it Was There wob: ya firl: other than nebbs, EN was my 1st bbs Vanyel: you were on nebbs, too? firl: unofficially yes wob: long long ago wob: long ago wob: long firl: long! wob: heh Vanyel: yeah Vanyel: I was still in high school I think firl: i was firl: December 91! Vanyel: heck, I was there when they disabled chat firl: i got in trouble for having many many emails stored that were talking about illegal drugs :) Moni: you youngins Vanyel: ahahahah Vanyel: I think it was also my first non-uucp e-mail address, too janet: mm janet: being lectured to about cars firl: when will you start lectruing about explosives? Vanyel: whose lecturing you about cars Vanyel: hasws why have you not smited them yet janet: heh janet: hah, nebbs Vanyel: it was shitty anyway Vanyel: I love "The Office" janet: heh firl: yes marcie: i also had email from 92 on EN marcie: meeeeemories firl: i had emails from greg back when i dated him :) marcie: awww firl: le sigh -- RIP, EN 31 August 2005 %% firl: heh. whoops. I didn't recognize one of my student workers ed: kick him in the ayse marcie: kick him in the NUTS marcie: NUTS NUTS NUTS ed: right in tne newts ed: HARD ed: until his eyes bugout firl: it's like having the devil on one shoulder and the devil on the other shoulder around here -- firl being tempted 7 September 2005 %% ed: I was born to be a sailor ed: cursing ed: only ed: I'd have to be a drydock sailor ed: I don't know much about sailing ed: but I can curse devil: it's good to have a skill you can fall back on -- ed's many skills 8 September 2005 %% devil: what kind of office whore doesn't even have good tits? ed: she is a dainty little anorexic slim tanned cunty wob: so break her in half with your biker p33n ed: I find her about as attractive as I'd find fucking a 2x4 with a wet-spot -- ed on women 13 September 2005 %% Moni: oo..Friday on Oprah: When Your Identical Twin Has a Sex Change Vanyel: fascinating Vanyel: I gotta admit, since janet started going through her thing Vanyel: i've learned so much aobut something that I'd have made fun of previously Moni: good deal! :> marcie: yah' Vanyel: I guess god has a way of teaching me lessons. Moni: heh Moni: weird that way Vanyel: absolutely. Moni: just think of the diversity you've been exposed to..lesbians, sm, transgender stuff, wob... Vanyel: rofl -- EN, diversity central 14 September 2005 %% janet: darnit, more jelly donut porn spam -- janet and her spam mail 15 September 2005 %% Vanyel: one of the things I love about having cats: Vanyel: they find things you thought you lost under the couch firl: one of the things I hate about having cats: firl: they lose things under the couch -- cats 16 September 2005 %% ed: wob has tits wob: that is a problem for me. -- wob's luscious tits 16 September 2005 %% firl: ed: you're like a sexual camel firl: oops. firl: damn cat Vanyel: ahahahah what marcie: ed speaking to elric Vanyel: must havemissed that Vanyel: explain to me what a sexual camel is? firl: either you like humping or you can go a long time without sex firl: but those are my guesses :) ed: yea ed: jesus christ ed: how often can elric get laid? ed: really ed: like leo before rachel Vanyel: hey ed: leo was a sexual camel Vanyel: I got plenty of sex Vanyel: masturbation counts, right? ed: the only thing he banged was his head on the shelf in his closet firl: ahahaha -- camels and other critters 16 September 2005 %% Moni: heh..fucking fingers Vanyel: heh. Vanyel: fucking. Moni: ya Moni: they finally did that marcie: yah! Moni preens Vanyel: YES! marcie: what? Moni: I'm such a stud Vanyel: moni its some kind of law marcie: moni? Moni: but now they don't work Vanyel: conservation of sex energy marcie: your fingers? Vanyel: when you're getting some, I dont marcie: that is wrong. Vanyel: when i'm getting some, you dont marcie: ahahahha Moni: heh Moni: maybe it's a good thing that you are moving out of state then Vanyel: I'm lying on my stomach and Alex is sleeping on top of my ass Moni: maybe we'll both finally get some on a regular basis Al: say, did you both hit a dry spell in April or so? marcie: oy. -- Al getting some and marcie getting it Eagle's Nest BBS, 3 October 2005 %% firl: i learned it from watching you, ok? I learned it from watching YOU marcie: ahahaha ed: where did you learn all those other tricks ed: some of those *I* dont' even know. ed: *wob* doesn't know them. ed: and I know your mommy doesn't know them. firl: what? the helicopter move? firl: i still have to work on the dismount ed: the awesome pool move from Showgirls ed: I love the quote I saw "it's like a shark attack" firl: oh, i don't have that one down yet ed: how the hell are you able to handstand on 2 goats? firl: the trick is to sedate the goats ed: thats something you learn in a country that isn't the US. firl: wob learned it firl: and they don't even let him out of the country anymore ed: you're thinking of sheep firl: not since...the incident firl: oh! damn firl: one of those barnyard animals ed: dweez, however, can do it with cattle. firl: well, he's talented that way -- firl, the talented one Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 2005 %% ed: creme filled midget filled donkey ed: the stuff of legends -- ed, the inexplicable one Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 October 2005 %% firl: goddammit firl: who gets a cake delivered to a circulation desk anyway meg: someone who is seriously jonesing for cake meg: her regular cake dealer couldn't meet her on her lunch break firl: i want baggie-of-cake Vanyel: i have a cake square i got from the store meg: just don't get pulled over with a 20-kilo stash of cake in your trunk Vanyel: seriously officer! its for personal use! -- cake dealers Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 October 2005 %% janet: something about belgium janet: you have to love a country where the national symbol is a statue of a boy pissing -- my country tis of thee Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 October 2005 %% firl: i wish i could get all my daily nutrients from tootsie rolls janet: heh janet: they'd need to be called janet: Total tootsies firl: why you never went into marketing is beyong me -- firl, amazed Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 October 2005 %% firl: ok. back to the stacks *** firl is now known as stacking marcie: stack stack stack! marcie: staack those books! marcie: stack them high! stack them low! marcie: GO FIRL GO! wob: GET TO WORK FIRL stacking: i always wanted my own cheering section marcie: that's damn right wob: STACK THIS -- firl being cheered Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 October 2005 %% Vanyel: they are advertising KY on tv now wob: it's illegal to sell or use KY in Texas Vanyel: cool Vanyel: gives living in a "dry county" a new meaning wob: hahaha -- the new temperance movement Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 October 2005 %% Moni: my hair feels constipated -- Moni in need Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 October 2005 %% Moni has a confession to make Moni: I have a very late library book. Like...a month late wob: firl gets to spank you Moni: sweet Moni: I'm going to loose the book and then see what happens wob: now that's a great idea wob: lose a few for me too -- wob and moni taunting the Librarianatrix Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 October 2005 %% Beastie: ive come to like the taste of wild riish rose Beastie: im gonna turn into my life long dream Beastie: a homeless wino. -- Beastie, the man with a dream Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 November 2005 %% ed: do you nkow how hard it is to stick a quart of junebugs up a dogs ass? -- ed plotting the dog's death Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2005 %% marcie: mmm mogwai Vanyel: what? firl: you know, gremlins that play instruments Vanyel: oh. firl: well, pre-gremlins, i guess firl: no one fed them after midnight yet Vanyel: how do they know when its midnight? firl: internal clocks Vanyel: what timezone? Vanyel: and does DST matter? firl: waht do i look like? a gremlin breeder? -- firl, gremlin breeder extraordinaire Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 November 2005 %% Vanyel: cant slep devil: go to sleep Vanyel: i tried! Vanyel: i miss my girl and my kitties devil: masturbate and curl up with a stuffed animal -- devil with advice Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 November 2005 %% firl: what is active directory ed: microsoft shit Vanyel: imagine taking a huge submarine sandwic, filled with tomatoes, mayo,, cheee, roast beef, etc Vanyel: take a shit in it, and give it to a homeless man Vanyel: tell the homeless man that if he can find someone else to eat it, you'll give him 2000 dolars Vanyel: the homeless man is active directory firl: which part does microsoft facilitate? making the sandwich or the shit part firl: heh firl: oh firl: that is probably the worst analogy i've ever heard -- firl with standards Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 November 2005 %% Vanyel: damnit i'm getting the bird flu ed: stop having sex with birds Vanyel: but we're in ove -- Vanyel the bird lover Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 November 2005 %% Vanyel: we've got the cats, too Vanyel: Alex has taken to sleeping on top of my head Vanyel: this cannot continue ed: cats dont' sleep with us anymore ed: they live int he basement when it gets dark. ed: only took about a week ed: and now they look forward to it Vanyel: we actually like having the cats with us Vanyel: it makes sex kinkier when you don't know whose biting you -- Vanyel's kinky sex life Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2005 %% firl: I think I"m getting sick DontKnow: aww :( did leo bring you germs? firl: he must have marcie: it's the bird flu firl: thrax marcie: damn that thrax Al: thraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaax marcie: thraaaax marcie: THRAAAAAAAX Al: thraaaAAAAAAaaaax DontKnow sneezes marcie: see! -- DK spreading the thrax Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 November 2005 %% devil: i usually just kill a bunch of dogs and cats on christmas devil: people seem to sit around, open their presents, then look at their geriatric pets and say "alrighty, let's go kill the family pet" ed: xmas is the season for euthanasia -- devil in the xmas spirit Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2005 %% ed: my holiday season is pretty much planned out ed: work/drive/suck/work/drive/suck/work/drive/suck/drive/sitathome/suck ed: I wish suicide weren't so chickenshit -- ed, also in the xmas spirit Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 December 2005 %% Cerberus: our cat found out today that snow is cold. Cerberus: and that I get pissed off when he gets out and i have to chase him in the snow. Cerberus: and he really hates it when i catch him and then ROLL HIM IN IT so he realizes I'm not happy. Cerberus: fuzzy bastard. -- Cerberus, animal lover Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 December 2005 %% Vanyel: just for that, you cant share my chocolate muffin. ed: those aren't chocolate chips. -- ed, wary Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 December 2005 %% Vanyel: so wheres marcie Vanyel: I wonder if she got blown away ed: NEIN Cerberus: thought that was anatomically impossible. ed: exractly ed: tho ed: with the proper add-ons Cerberus: yeah, but would she feel it? Cerberus: cuz, really, w/o the sensation, what's the point? ed: haven't you watched any porno lately? ed: I'm pretty sure they feel it ed: I mean ed: who can act that out? Cerberus: touche' -- the boys missing marcie Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 December 2005 %% Vanyel: if I had breasts like that all the boys would like me -- Vanyel with a wish Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 December 2005 %% sunbeam: i can't get my xmas music to play ed: set it on fire sunbeam: no i'm in the spirit and shit -- sunbeam in the spirit of xmas Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 December 2005 %% sunbeam: great the toner nazi is here bitching us out *** ayla has left the room sunbeam: i see no reason to take toner cartridges that seriously marcie: you are correct wob: hahaha the toner nazi? sunbeam: according to toner nazi i'll 'be taking it purdy seriously when i run out!' marcie: ahahahah wob: hahahaha sunbeam: why can't i shoot white hot fireballs out of my eyes wob: that's h ilarious sunbeam: it's only because i ran out about 6 months ago and i went down and took one of her 11 boxes of toner and she's been on my case about it ever since sunbeam: i can't wait for my maternity leave so I can just not come back wob: gees wob: slap her sunbeam: no way sunbeam: the toner nazi looks like a medium sized lumberjack sunbeam: her meaty fists are about as big as my head sunbeam: she eats chili cheese fries for breakfast, that's hardcore marcie: hahahah sunbeam: she's scary marcie: awesome sunbeam: and stinky sunbeam: but mainly scary sunbeam: and obsessed with toner wob: HAHAHAHAH -- sunbeam at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 December 2005 %% Kestrel: I have a hemmaroid older than Ed ed: how old is it Kestrel: 32 ed: really? ed: christ, it has me beat by 2 years. ed: I bet that fucker is gnarly ed: looks like the butt-end of a piece of cut off summer sausage Kestrel: more like a hunk of beef jerky that was left out in the rain then the sun came out Cerberus: you guys are a great appetite suppressant. Cerberus: Phen-fen can go fuck itself. -- Kessie's medical condition Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 December 2005 %% sunbeam: tis the season to get 50 million jesus emails from my coworkers everyday -- merry xmas to sunbeam Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2005 %% ed: so, leo ed: I want a pictoral of the 12 day sof a fundie xmas ed: can you get that goin? Vanyel: sure ed: ON THE FIRST DAY OF FUNDAMENTALIST XMAS ed: my pastor/molestor gave to meeee! sunbeam: oh yay, a paltry xmas bonus ed: A ticket to get an abortion for FREEEEEE Vanyel: on the second day of christmas, bill o'riley gave to me sunbeam: this company is so giving Vanyel: 2 holiday NO WAIT CHRISTMAS ornamants ed: on the third day of fundamentalist xmas my GOP brownshirt leader gave to me! ed: 3 replacement billy clubs for civil rights beat downs Cerberus: And a MagLight Named Roooooood-NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY Cerberus: 6 D-cells are your friend (tm) marcie: on the fourth day of fundy xmas my neocon warhawk brother gave to meeeee marcie: 4 dead towelheads ed: go leo meg: on the 5th day of xmas Focus on the Family gave to me meg: 5 marriage protection amendments marcie: on the 6th day of fundy xmas the american family association gave to meeee marcie: 6 useless boycotts! meg: and they'd better hurry too cuz joey and miryam are srsly threatening my marriage or something marcie: ahahahah marcie: yeah baby! ed: on the 7th day of fundie xmas my ultra right news agency gave to me! ed: 7 fabricated news reports on terrorist plots thwarted by their great and holy leeeader! Cerberus: on the 8th day of fundie xmas my G8 economic powerhouse country leaders gave to me... ed: ok 8 ed: yes! Cerberus: 8 administrations that pander to oil interestssssssss. ed: on the 9th day of xmas my wonderful leadership gave to me Cerberus: On the 10th day of fundie xmas, my local mega-mall marketing department gave to meeeee ed: hey Cerberus: 10 overhyped sales for overpriced merchandise that attempts to appeal to my inner child's guilt over not getting a pony when I was 10 ed: 9 aids a scurrying away from litigation! ed: mine could use some polish sunbeam: heh cerbs was good marcie: on the 11th day of fundy xmas my pResident gave to meeee marcie: 11 impeached administration officials meg: on the 12th day of fundy xmas my pharmacist gave to me meg: 12 rejected morning-after birth control prescriptions marcie: YEAH marcie: right on! sunbeam: LOL marcie: nice way to end it :) Cerberus: haah marcie: merry fucking xmas, y'all ed: yes ed: exactly ed: AND A LECTURE OOON MOOOORALITYYYYYY -- happy holidays from EN! Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2005 %% wob: word probably got out from last years party that some of the employees get a little wild wob: like falling down stairs, immediately getting up and getting another drink Vanyel: i've done that sunbeam: me too wob: to me that was a sign that it was a good party sunbeam: it's like the puke & rally move Vanyel: "dammit I drilled my spink! wob: hehe wob: he had blood dripping down his forehead wob: onto his shirt wob: but still at the bar wob: getting another drink ;) Vanyel: awesome. sunbeam: that's dedication Vanyel: an engineer? Vanyel: or a salesugy wob: haha no wob: he is the director of the customer call center Vanyel: ah Vanyel: so he's used to abuse wob: totally -- the annual xmas party Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2005 %% sunbeam: my job's loaded full of dumbasses maybe something funny will happen tonight wob: the company xmas party can be a total dud wob: OR it can get outa control wob: exactly wob: anything could happen! sunbeam: if nothing cool happens by the time i'm ready to leave i'm going to let the air out of all the tires in the parking lot on my way out wob: hahaha -- sunbeam's office xmas party Eagle's Nest BBS, 9 December 2005 %% Moni gripes. Wow..i'm a seriously crabby bitch today marcie: carry on. Moni goes to firl's library and starts throwing books onto the floor marcie: YEAH Moni: this is feeling good :) Moni: give the stacker something to do Moni finds the big law books and drops them wiht a huge BOOM Moni: I'm being noisy in the library! Moni: Na na na na naaaa na marcie: hee Moni changes the homepage on the computers to the SEX WITH LIBARIANS website Moni randomly removes one page of books Moni reshslves the books in backwards dewydecminal system marcie applauds Moni: thank you Moni: I can be creative, even when I'm in pain Moni fills up the returned books bin and doesn't check them back in Moni takes the paper out of the copy machine marcie cheers Moni brings a big mac into the library and eats it over an open book Moni puts on her tinfoil hat to discourage the fbi from finding out what she's doing. firl: man you kids are MEAN when it's finals week -- Moni making trouble for the Librarianatrix Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 December 2005 %% ed: nutkicking! ed: make sure you go front/back bag ed: that is keay ed: seems to me that a couple hard back-bag kicks, and you may solve the problem for future generations. marcie: some of these fux have already bred marcie: not that i understand how Moni: erg ed: insert tab A into slot B marcie: howthey found a woman desperate enough to reproduce with them ed: how engineers find a place to dampen their dick is an amazing thing. ed: it's like when you find a smelly geek that has procreated ed: you're in fucking awe ed: "christ, the mating instinct must be almost animal in some people." meg: never underestimate the power of booze -- engineers in the wild Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2005 %% marcie: vannypoo marcie: my golden little turd Vanyel: <3 marcie: aw marcie: feel the love Vanyel: thats a cum-filled love balloon marcie: i just knew it. marcie: you really do care! Vanyel: I really do care. Vanyel: about what, I have no idea. marcie: atta boy Vanyel: :D -- the love, the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 December 2005 %% ed: TITITES ed: AN A?NCIENT PEOPLE WHO WORSHIPPED THE NIPPLE. -- ed the anthropologist Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 December 2005 %% ed: every user is a problem that liberal use of sex eduation could have solved. -- ed loving his job Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 December 2005 %% janet: when we repurposed our search engine to try out porn janet: testing was...interesting janet: all too frequently something would pop up and someone would yell "oh, my eyes!" wob: it's a cess pool out there janet hums "internet porn" janet: girl on girl on girl on girl on girl on guy on sheep... Vanyel: my favorite was the furnature porn., janet: heh janet: what an accident janet: crawling the web for furniture data janet: that job had so many wacky moments janet: and now janet: i work for a place janet: that sells animated cellphone backgrounds of a naked woman wiggling on all fours janet shakes her head -- janet at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 December 2005 %% ed: sweet fucking jesus covered in KY falling out of an elephants asshole -- ed cursing soundly Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2005 %% Kestrel: and his fetish is... every technology leader(me) has to do a "webinar" every quarter Kestrel: asshole prick licker Vanyel: yeah i'm about to do one of thote "webinars" myself janet leverages leo's synergy marcie gets proactive Kestrel enables Vanyel gets proactive by leveraging his synergy against joy's knees Vanyel: by dryhumping them marcie works on leo's action items Vanyel: UNF UNF UNF marcie: YEAH -- corporate EN orgy! Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2005 %% janet narfs Kestrel: hm Kestrel: define narf Kestrel: because that is what we called biting the bubbles in the bathtub when I was a wee lad Kestrel: and I suspect that is not what you are doing marcie bites kessy's bubble janet: are you pondering what i'm pondering, joey? marcie: i think so, janet, but where are we going to get a rubber tutu at this time of night? Kestrel: um Kestrel: this scares me janet dusts kes lightly with corn starch ed: be afraid ed: with your eyes on janet and marcie, leo is going for the backdoor, which lies unattended. Vanyel: ok Vanyel: now where was I Moni: faling alseep Vanyel: i wish Moni: same Moni: I'm exausted Moni: ya know..just once..I wish someone would call me and NOT complain! Moni: oh wait..I'm a therapist. stupid me Kestrel: give me the number Kestrel: I'll call ya Moni: heh Kestrel: and not complain Kestrel: YOU might Moni: heavy hot breathing on the phone Kestrel: at a minimum Moni: woo Kestrel: with the occasional sneeze from the corn starch -- Kestrel fearing for his life Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 December 2005 %% meg: newts is one of the nicknames i have for our big fat kitty ed: fatman ed: fatass ed: asshole ed: those are our fat kitties name ed: for he is mean and illtempered ed: and walks on my nuts ed: verbal abuse is key to a lasting relationship with your pets. -- ed the animal lover Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 December 2005 %% Vanyel: oh jesus fuck Vanyel: Fught Club, the Bollywood Musical Vanyel: http://www.radiosargam.com/video/trailers/878files/rs_fightclub_1.mp g Vanyel: "I want you to rip my dot off AS HARD AS YOU CAN" -- Vanyel being all aggro Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2006 %% ed: oh fuck me ed: I'm crying over here. ed: crprttool: I'd still be the Windows Server Guy ed: crprttool: I'm a bit afraid of taking that step ed: kernelink: remember, even Christ descended into hell for a while! ed: I'd also be mail/dns guy too ed: and that is unix. Vanyel: dude if you have to give satan blowjobs it'll be an improvement -- ed descending into hell Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2006 %% Vanyel: I got rhythm Vanyel: I got music Vanyel: *fart* Vanyel: who coulkd ask for anything more? cerby: gas mask would be nice. -- Vanyel serenading EN Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2006 %% ed: see one of my eye teeth is "interesting" ed: so I'm always fucking with it with my tongue or clicking/grinding my teeth against it ed: I try and use gum to busy my mouth with other stuff. Vanyel: dentist. ed: I tried cock, but, I didn't like the aftertaste. -- ed looking for dental solutions Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2006 %% ed: there is discussion of xserver shit ed: soem of the faculty have been pushign for mac stuff ed: but ed: nobody to maintain it ed: I think it'd suck inbetween windows and unix ed: it'd suck in that steve jobs Pierre sort of way ed: like at first ed: steve's lips would caress and make their way deeper and deeper down your shaft ed: at the 80% kielbasa mark, his throat teeth would kick in and shred the head of your cock. marcie: ahahahahahaha ed: With Balmer and Gates, the teeth extend 6 feet in front of them. ed: jobs looks benign and all new agey ed: he's just a more refined shark ed: he has standards wob: he does? *** Beastie has entered room 'Main' Beastie: headaches suck ed: well ed: as long as they're packaged properly ed: he's all good with it ed: Gates doesn't mind if his goodies are packaged in foetid shit covered with placenta and colon sauce. sunbeam: ed sunbeam: your foulness never ceases to amaze me..truly sunbeam: you've got a gift' ed: pity it's not marketable. meg: no, it's entirely useless meg: but it's still special firl: "special" firl: in a 'riding the short bus' kind of way meg: nah meg: it takes great intelligence to string together the obscenities ed can ed: mahahahah meg: it's not your typical tourettes shit ed: the sarcasm almsot dropped from your tongue and burnt a hole in wobs pants. -- ed's special gift Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 January 2006 %% cerby DNSifies his left buttock cerby: left-cheek IN CNAME butt cerby: right-cheek IN CNAME butt cerby: vertical-smile IN CNAME crack cerby gets carried away -- cerb geeks out Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 January 2006 %% Moni: I had a dream last night that the wife and I went grocery shopping (which we did yesterday irl) and I wanted some pastrami Moni: She didn't want to get it for me and after a lot of not telling me why, finally told me that pastrami is made from cow uterus Moni: I realized this morning that I had a conversation yesterday with saundo about cow uterus Moni: my brain is weird ed: hahah marcie: awesome Moni: I'll never be able to eat a reuben again -- Moni's odd brain Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 January 2006 %% sunbeam: i lub jake plummer wob: you love the hippie beard sunbeam: no sunbeam: he was hotter when he played for az wob: heh sunbeam: but i know that under that denver hippie train wreck hair problem, he's hot -- sunbeam's quarterback luv Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2006 %% Moni: hmm..another day, another homocidal rage Moni: yup..it's monday -- Moni at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 January 2006 %% sunbeam: i only break out 'floculation' when i'm really agitated marcie: narf Vanyel: can I call you up and can you say tha tword? Vanyel: that'd be neat. marcie: ahahaha sunbeam: heh, it's really not that sexy Vanyel: yes it is. Vanyel: a woman shold nerver tell a man what's not sexy. janet: uh huh. Vanyel: if I, as a man, find a woman with milk poured over her face in the shower sexy, you shoudn't disagree. -- Vanyel's fetishes Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 January 2006 %% devil: yes, i can type with cock in mouth -- devil, a woman of many talents Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2006 %% cerby: hey ed, after several days of the humidifier running 24/7, the cat is finally static-free ed: hahaah wob: touch my krone ed: saturation point marcie: ahahahah cerby: aye -- cerby's wet pussy Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 January 2006 %% Vanyel: i'm talking about hilary swank Vanyel: not the character wob: her head scares me devil: she's funny looking wob: her forehead is huge wob: you could land a 747 on her forehead Vanyel: good, it gives me a place to keep my beer while i'm fucking her cerby: you put your beer down? wob: ahahahah -- cerby, sensitive guy Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 January 2006 %% ed: ?meet your sweetheart impaled on gigantic schlongs ed: thats interesting sunbeam: so delicious marcie: allrightythen -- sunbeam's strange tastes Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2006 %% Moni: wow..I have some amazxingly toxic gas Moni: phew Moni: jsut thought I'd share marcie: nice devil: such a delicate little petal... Moni: I thought I was alone and let one slip out in the chart room Moni: the chart room guy started gagging Moni: thankfully he was on the other side of the stacks, so I got to sneak away before he saw who it was -- Moni, a delicate flower Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2006 %% sunbeam burps and blames it on Moni Moni farts and blames it on Russia -- Moni passing the blame Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 January 2006 %% ed: bone saws, homebrew and pussy -- ed's idea of a good time Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 January 2006 %% china: i am officially menopausal china: and it is awesome marcie: very cool :D Vanyel: i never cease to be amazed at he difference between women and men china: in what way? Vanyel: if I had my balls removed i'd be like HOLY SHIT THIS ISNT COOL AT ALL!@#$@!#$ marcie: ahahahahah -- Vanyel is from Mars Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2006 %% Vanyel: great Vanyel: democrats arent going to filibuster Alito marcie: pussies. china: why the hell not? china: man, we are so close to losing whatever few civil rights we have Vanyel: right. Lia: time to look into the EN island china: yes, it is ed: yes ed: I'd brew beer ed: and be the local message handler Vanyel: i'll be the token jew ed: I don't know that we'd have net to the island marcie: hey :P ed: but i could setup a shortwave station :) Vanyel: we wouldn't need it. marcie: i'm the token jew too! Lia: cool Vanyel: no, youre the token lesbian who happens to be a jew ed: you're a rubber stamp jew! marcie: okay then Lia: I'm the token DNA geek ed: you don't have the hook nose ed: you come to us with that ed: you can be TJ2 marcie: ahahah Lia: janet and I will be in charge of setting up the explosives defense system ed: fuck it ed: whre we put the island ed: if anybody makes it ed: they're welcome to stay ed: but Lia: heh ed: there is a group sodomy gauntlet ed issues everyone their own coke bottle marcie: ahahah marcie: i like it ed: that is the last line of defense. ed: "well,k you made it" Lia: oy ed: "but, you're not quite there!" ed: "what follows is 8 hours of binge drinking, not by you, by us, and then you must run the gauntlet!" ed: "gauntlet! you guys have like paddles and stuff? when I joined the COCKs I had to do that!" ed: "it's kinda like that, Joy, give him a taste." Lia: oh dear ed: *flump* *suckkkkk* *pop* ed: *skedaddle noises, followed by a splash* ed: see ed: charter members are safe from this. marcie: of course -- the EN island, revisited Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 January 2006 %% ed: believe it or not ed: I'm turding on air ed: I never thought I could feel so annngstyyyy -- ed sings Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 January 2006 %% Moni slacks janet cords marcie chinos Vanyel boxers all of ya Moni: you three are just SOOO damn funny. har har har janet pleats moni Moni groans janet pleats moni 'till she folds marcie: werd Moni lets down her hem -- clothed in righteousness, EN continues Eagle's Nest BBS, 31 January 2006 %% ed: whoreslut ed: turdcakes whoreslut ed: hmm ed: a whoreducken marcie: ahahaha marcie: i like that one ed: it's a whore wrapped in saran wrap ed: that is actually wrapping Dick Cheney, 6 other GOP lackeys marcie: ahahahahhahahaha ed: and in the center of the meatball is a Homeland Security Mic ed: in Cheney's left breast pocket is a picture of F Scott Fitzgerald in drag. ed: man marcie: damn ed ed: my day needs an eject button marcie: i fear your imagination Vanyel: your day needs a baseball bat and a free swing, ed ed: you mean you don't imagine a fence post wedged longwise in the ass of a goat when you see W do his little snigger dance on National TV? marcie: i didn't say that -- ed the Democrat Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 2006 %% Lia: hell, ever your DNA likes to fuck with me Lia: ok that sounded bad cerby: WTF are you two talking about? Lia: DNA Lia: I did Van's DNA profile for him cerby: ah Lia: he sent me a beard hair Lia: and 3 buccal swabs marcie: neato Vanyel: one of them I think was actually Alex's Vanyel: Lia is going to clone me and turn my clone into an unstoppable war machine cerby: swank. Lia: was that the one with one end? janet: The Six Million Dollar Mensch Vanyel: I dont think so Lia: *rofl* cerby: of course, in reality, she'll embed a directive that only allows it to pick up dry cleaning, chinese food and extra tampons cerby: cuz women are evil (tm) *** Vanyel has left the room Lia: oh no *** Vanyel has entered room 'Main' Lia: ahahahahaha *** *** Vanyel (Six Million Dollar Mensch): *** Logged in from pool-71-252-198-232.dllstx.fios.verizo since Mon Jan 16 09:15:32 2006 -- Vanyel the unstoppable war machine Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 2006 %% firl: I don't get people. How can you type 27 words a minute and get 32 errors firl: that seems sort of bad -- firl's skilled employees Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 February 2006 %% Vanyel: my stomach is on fire. Vanyel: literally Vanyel: I think I just farted smoke Vanyel: hold on Vanyel: i'm gonna try for a smoke ring -- Vanyel the circus freak Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 February 2006 %% cerbbag: Also in Tehran, protesters threw Molotov cocktails at the Norwegian Embassy, cerbbag: ahhhahahahahahah ed: hrm. ed: fucking towelheads cerbbag: Ragheads: all them white heathens look alike. americans, denmarkians, norweigans. Let's burn 'em all to the ground!" ed: why didn't they open fire with their rubber bullet gun ed: this isn't helping the rags out ed: they need to calm the fuck down cerbbag: and ppl wonder why America's foreign policy can be summed up in 3 words: bomb brown people -- the patriotic Americans Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2006 %% Vanyel: when was the last time he got a blowjob from you sunbeam: he gets them like 3 times a week at least Vanyel: what does he do to deserve 3 blowjob s a week? sunbeam: i have prego hormones that are out of control, it's not really him -- sunbeam loves her boyfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 February 2006 %% firl: i just got a call from someone claiming to be "homeland security" firl: i transfered them to the other switchboard firl: i can't deal with crap like that before i've finished my coffee -- firl, awake Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 February 2006 %% janet: morning has broken janet: like the first oracle install janet: errorlog has spoken janet: like the first kernel panic janet: praise for the syslogging Vanyel smacks janet with a solaris media kit janet: praise for the morning janet: praise for my cell phone janet: ringing off hook janet: :P -- janet the poet Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 February 2006 %% ed: dweez strikes me as a guy that has a hand on the knob while he's grunting and thinking of wob dweez: you've obviously seen the pictuers -- dweez and wob's forbidden lurv Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 February 2006 %% Vanyel: Darth cheney wouldnt' face murder 1 if he stuck his hand into someones chest, removed their heart, and feasted on it -- Vanyel on Cheney shooting his pal Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2006 %% sunbeam: i'm going crazy muchacha on a brownie right now dweez: you are bad sunbeam: unborn babies love brownies, it's a proven fact -- sunners the good mama Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2006 %% Moni: Thousands rampaged through two cities Tuesday in Pakistan's worst violence against Prophet Muhammad caricatures, burning buildings housing a hotel, banks and a KFC, vandalizing a Citibank an Moni: breaking windows at a Holiday Inn and a Pizza Hut. Moni: so..it's Pizza Hut's fault? marcie: allrighty sunbeam: pizza hut is some bad pizza..they probably just burned that one because it needed it sunbeam: but kfc? sunbeam: that's madness Moni: extra chrispy -- extra crispy politics Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 February 2006 %% janet: oh leo Vanyel: oh janet janet: i've been having a little fun with melatonin lately Vanyel: oh? Vanyel: explain. Vanyel: I took some last niht and had another weird dream Vanyel: I think I broke some laws of physics, as well janet: i think over time i've chipped away at the boundary between internal and external realities in my mind Vanyel: some might say thats a psychosis, janet :P janet: when i take it before bed i start tripping for about a half hour and then fall asleep :) janet: i have to say the dreams are really really weird janet: watching mr. t get out of a pink mary kay cadillac -- janet's dreams Eagle's Nest BBS, 16 February 2006 %% dweez: hey dave dweez: doesn't your life take a hit when you work nights so much? dweez: my brain would implode ed: his masturbation schedule is adjusted cerbTARD: why adjust? wank @ work cerbTARD: it's the american way -- cerb the all-american worker bee Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 February 2006 %% Moni: I had a dream last night that I took my cousin (who really isn't my cousin) to kinky stuff Moni: I took her to a sex shop and introduced her to many items Moni: heh ed: did they like it? Moni: very much so ed: did you test drive them ed: that is the key! Moni: oh yes ed: the key is the test drive ed: perfect. Moni: there was much test driving Moni: it was a lovely dream Moni: just weird that she was my cousin Moni: but, not really my cousin Moni: I don't have any relatives that hot -- Moni's non-hot relatives Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 February 2006 %% sunbeam: he's 6'1, 140 sunbeam: he's like two chopsticks and a head -- sunbeam on her boyfriend Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 February 2006 %% sunbeam: one cool thing about being pregnant is seeing the inside of your bellybutton sunbeam: it's like a mystery you waited your whole life to find out sunbeam: it's very satisfying -- sunbeam's an outie Eagle's Nest BBS, 24 February 2006 %% Beastie: i think im going to throw away half of everything i own. Beastie: im sick of looking at it marcie: very good Vanyel: sell it instead Vanyel: you can buy more drugs that way wob: you own stuff? wob: I tohught hippies weren't allowed to own stuff Beastie: i dont do drugs Beastie: im clean Beastie: didnt you know Vanyel: really? Vanyel: how long now? Beastie: i dont own anything of value or that i didnt "discover" Beastie: 5 minutes. -- Beastie just says no Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2006 %% Beastie: i take great pleasurein destroying my life. Beastie: its the one thing im good at. -- Beastie has mad skillz Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2006 %% Beastie: this guy has his shit together now Beastie: well aside from being a pothead alcoholic Beastie: but hey we all have our faults -- Beastie's brother Eagle's Nest BBS, 27 February 2006 %% devil: do you think that there will be a national holiday when bob barker dies? devil: he has influenced america more and longer than most presidents -- devil the patriot Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 March 2006 %% Vanyel: so i'm doing laundry devil: sweet, will you do mine too? Vanyel: whats in it for me devil: the joy of playing with my undies? -- devvy with an offer nobody could refuse Eagle's Nest BBS, 2 March 2006 %% Vanyel: shes got like 8 kids now Vanyel: last I heard wob: she go mormon or something? Vanyel: no, christian Vanyel: shes apparently a hardcore christian now wob: ahahaha wob: that's not surprising Vanyel: I get xmas cards from her Vanyel: they are "jesus jesus jesus jesus jesus merry jesus birthday christmas god god god god" wob: "Jesus loves you, but you still killed him you jew bastard!" marcie: ahahahahah -- Hope's spiritual life Eagle's Nest BBS, 6 March 2006 %% Moni: I confess, I am hot -- Moni's true confessions Eagle's Nest BBS, 7 March 2006 %% cerby: so last night, instead of being a good little camper and going to sleep early so i'd be functional at work today... cerby: met up with some buddies at 10pm and drank beer and smoked cigars until after midnight. Vanyel: oops. Vanyel: I fell asleep at like 8 cerby: i think i can taste the scum on the bottom of a trash truck. Vanyel: just because you can doesnt mean you have to. cerby: yes! cerby: no cerby: weait cerby: wait cerby: must cerby: relive cerby: youth cerby: ugh -- cerby, old Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 March 2006 %% meg: Miss Deaf Texas Struck, Killed By Train marcie: awesome. meg: Authorities said 18-year-old Tara Rose McAvoy was walking near railroad tracks when she was struck by a Union Pacific train. A witness told Austin television station KTBC the train sounded meg: its horn right up until the collision occurred. Vanyel: pee meg: i guess nobody tells deaf people not to walk on train tracks anymore Vanyel: nope. meg: probably because they're not supposed to think there's anything they can't do marcie: YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT, HONEY! Vanyel: someone should remind 'em they can't hear meg: like the blind couple who couldn't get a day care license marcie: DONT LET ANYONE TELL YOU YOU CANT WALK ON TRAIN TRACKS IF YOU WANT TO! Vanyel: meg, do you know that the NRA has firearms classes for blind people? Vanyel: that seems a bit odd to me. meg: hahah meg: great meg: how are they supposed to determine their target, by smell? -- boarding the train to hell Eagle's Nest BBS, 14 March 2006 %% Vanyel: a whole generation of kids are growing up that don't know the hear1235@#!%$%!@#TWEDS NO CARRIER cerby: hah. cerby: yeah, kids who can't identify the speed of a connectionby the precise sequence of modem tones cerby: bastards! Vanyel: DON'T TRY TO FOOL ME, BOY! THAT'S A FAX MACHINE! -- Vanyel, the cranky old bastard Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 March 2006 %% china: found and washed my doctor who scarf marcie: :) Vanyel: oh god china Vanyel: you'd totally, like, really, honestly be my dream girl if you wrent gay right about now. marcie: :D china smoochies van -- Vanyel the nerd Eagle's Nest BBS, 28 March 2006 %% Lia: nothing says I love you like a 9 mm beretta -- Lia the gun-friendly girl Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2006 %% cerby: A CAT RIM JOB cerby: THIS IS WHAT MY LIFE HAS BECOME -- cerby's job sucks Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 April 2006 %% Moni: omg..i just saw a squirrel choke Moni: My mom feeds the squirrls peanuts out of a cat dish on her back deck. A squirrel came up to the dish, grabbed a penut and faced the screen door looking in at me. He sat up to eat his peanut Moni: then suddenly started hacking Moni: he got down on all fours and coughed (little squeaky cough) until he hacked up that peanut Moni: which he then ate..again marcie: nicely done, squirrel Moni: ya..I really didn't want to do a heimlich on a squirrel marcie: it would have been awesome if you had, though marcie: "stand back! I'm a doctor!" Moni: I'm not a vet Moni: I'll sit the squirrel down and talk to him about his traumatic near-death experience marcie: ahahahhaa -- Moni the wildlife counselor Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 April 2006 %% firl: i learned today there is a KISS tribute mand made up of midgets cerby: mmm really? firl: minikiss or tinykiss or something firl: i'm trying to answer this stupid trivia question and google starts throwing midgets at me cerby: ya know firl...some people would pay a lot of money to have midgets thrown at them. firl: true -- midget-flinging Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 April 2006 %% cerby: ahh, I'm doing some parental controls testing today cerby: so my job FORCES me to look at porno sites to verify brokenness Vanyel: fucking awesome cerby: www.jugs.com "Jugs.com - boobs, big Boobs, Small Boobs, all kinds of boobs and tits" cerby: some days it doesn't suck. sirsyko: yah but doesnt force you to spank while doing so ed: and collect your spunk in a cheap coffee cup and leave it in the break room. cerby: hah sirsyko: "hrm, the cream in my coffee is chewy..." ed: "smells musky" cerby: hah cerby: smells musky just made me spit out my tea. cerby: you suck. ed: ahhahahaah wob: ahahahaha wob: fuckers wob: thats disgusting wob: i almost spit coffee all over my screen ed: what can I say. ed: cept now I know you guys are all spitters. -- mmm, protein Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2006 %% Vanyel: are you calling me fat, janet? Vanyel frowns marcie fattens leo up for slaughter Vanyel: I DO NOT HAVE BLUBBER marcie: but you will Vanyel: I am just pleasantly plump. marcie prepares the steak and beer Vanyel: damnit. marcie: :D -- marcie and fat leo Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2006 %% rain: it's all fun and games until someone calls social services -- rain on raising kids Eagle's Nest BBS, 20 April 2006 %% *** dweez has entered room 'Main' dweez: hey bitches wob: hello Mr Detachable Penis devil: dude, you have a detachable penis? wob: dweez does devil: that's so hot -- devil getting all hot & bothered Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 April 2006 %% cerby: convertibles and motorcycles have a detrimental effect on me wanting to work. marcie: duh cerby: now I just need a big breasted blonde to go cruising in.. cerby: but she's at work today too. bleck. Slayer: i can put on a wig cerby: mmm, but then the drapes won't match the carpet.. Slayer: i shave, big boy cerby: it's an awefully thoughtful offer tho Leo, but I'll pass. Vanyel: what teh hell did I just offer -- Leo coming in late Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 May 2006 %% cerby: I just got a call "the internet is broken" cerby: YER A FUCKING AOL EMPLOYEE. BUY A GODDAMN CLUE ed: your task, should you choose to accept it is to make this person an ex-employee ed: your tools: ed: a wrench ed: a rusty nail ed: 6 pennies ed: a deep cycle battery ed: a bucket of water cerby: hah. ed: intricate knowledge of the innerweb ed: goat.se cerby: yes! -- cerb getting excited about his job Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 May 2006 %% cerbbag: beat this, MoFo cerbbag: Ken Lay (of enron fame) is dead cerbbag: FORMER ENRON CHAIRMAN AND CEO KEN LAY DIED TUESDAY NIGHT AFTER SUFFERING A MASSIVE HEART ATTACK cerbbag: Atlantic City's 12 casinos are all closed cerbbag: amazing. Didn't think he had a heart. cerbbag: I wonder if the EMTs had been former Enron shareholders. "man, we TRIED, really, we did. and we couldn't bring him back. Us backing over him 6 times with the ambulance was just a cerbbag: coincidence -- the wicked CEO is dead Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 July 2006 %% Vanyel: hey janet janet: leobobeo Vanyel: if some of my gun and explosives friends get together a to shoot and blow stuff up wanna come? janet: uhh janet: ca janet: can i bring party favors? Vanyel: if they explode, sure -- exploding Janet Eagle's Nest BBS, 5 July 2006 %% Moni: bikini wax is as painful as I'll go Moni: I find it rather an amusing experience though. Every single waxing place I've gone to, has these non-English speaking Vietnamese women working there. Moni: They chatter way to each other and rip the wax off in such a casual manner. marcie: humans are remarkably adaptable :) Moni: I just imagine them saying things like "Well, I have to pick up my son from (RRIIIIIPPPP) school at 4pm today, so I can't (APPLY BURNING HOT WAX TO GENETALIA) go out to dinner (RIPPPP) Moni: tonight Moni: 'course, they are probably bitching about how stinky, big hair american women are. Moni: heh marcie: ahahahaha cerby: haha -- Moni's bikini wax Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 July 2006 %% wob: wow wob: our nation is a fuckin joke wob: OH NOEZ I CAN BLOW UP PLANES WITH TOOTHPASTE -- wob the terrorist Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2006 %% cerby: left for lunch at 10:30, just got back. cerby: i gotta find another job. wob: yeah wob: hell wob: why'd you come back cerby: well, I tell ya. it's really REALLY fucking complicated cerby: but, to summarize it quickly: foundry is bringing us cookies at 3pm. cerby: :) cerby: and I don't wanna miss free cookies. -- cerb the good American worker Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2006 %% ed: get to lickin ed: how many licks does it take to get to the center of sally struthers clitoris? ed: only cerby knows marcie: god that's foul cerby: if my tongue had spines on it like a cats, only 56,000. marcie: that made me throw up in my mouth a little ed: you know when they get that big they have trouble washin, cerb ed: your tongue will have to undo the work of 15 years of spa treatments could not cerby: I'm happy to say that would be a first. ed: you'd smack your lips and motion maria schriver over to soak the taste out of your mouth marcie: gach marcie: dude marcie: i'm going to have to gargle with clorox ed: so is cerby cerby: haha cerby: I'm already soaking my tongue in Lye just from this discussion. ed: he'll catch that last dribble as it starts to head down the bonch and is a mere 1/4 inche away from Marias asshole ed: who's had lunch already? marcie: not me marcie: thanks, asshole marcie: ;) cerby: hah. I have :) cerby: marcie - best diet plan ever will be spending the hour prior to a meal on en janet: AHHHHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH cerby: when ed is bored. marcie: yeah no kidding -- ed's girlfriend, Sally Struthers Eagle's Nest BBS, 10 August 2006 %% saundmob: i have attained geekery marcie: lies marcie: you are a nerd saundmob: i am sshing into the nest over evdo from a restroom stall Vanyel: thats fucking awesomem marcie: very good saundmob: bow to me! saundmob: wait, crowning marcie: ahahahhaa saundmob: false alarm saundmob: gas bubble -- saundo, the king of poo Eagle's Nest BBS, 11 August 2006 %% DontKnow: the last name of the guy i'm currently sharing an office with is Hussein. wob: so DontKnow grabs saddam smacks wob with him. marcie: kinky ed: no ed: kinky is Saddam, 6 goats, 4 kurds with nipple rings and little cock studs around the circumference of their meatsticks, all of which are covered with liberal ammounts of unrefined crude oil ed: with dick cheney riding W bareback with a ballgag and his wrinkly hands burning the skin of his wrinkly cock with their rapid updown motion as he finishes with a solid slap on W's ass whilst ed: filling his entire crevice with gunky yellowish old man spunk. marcie: ahahahahahahahahah oh my fucking god dude marcie: i am going to vomit marcie: right down your neck marcie: and it's your own fault marcie: god *damn* that's a nasty image -- ed the Republican Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 August 2006 %% wob: hey u2 whats up man wob: ltns u235: nadda - just dropped by to see how many of you got sex change operations and who was due up for springer marcie: janet's up for her operation in september, actually... wob: HAHAHAHAHA marcie: :D u235: see wob: funny that you bring it up u235: U knows all! marcie: clearly! -- U235 the all-knowing Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2006 %% wob: no plans for kids really wob: not right now anyway ed: you can't call it sex if you lose it all over her kneecap u235: I have 3, but I'll be down to 2 by tomorrow ed: stew tonight? u235: lololol u235: nah - college ed: so...meat stew u235: driving her to the holyland today - she moves into her dorm tomorrow ed: sweaty meaty stew with an underaged alcohol chaser wob: send her here ed: haha wob: bring me the gurl, i'll return you the woman wob: ;) u235: her kneecaps down't count either wob -- u235's daughter getting corrupted Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2006 %% ed: IT is like this huge money producing boil on my ass ed: I sit on it marcie: ahahahaha no shit ed: and a bit of money dribbles out of it marcie: that's a *great* image ed: and I pay my mortgage, buy some toys ed: buy more spooge rags u235: LOL ed: and then I sit and listen to goddamned lusers and their goddamned whining. ed: and I suffer the burden of the stupid, for them. -- ed's burden Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2006 %% u235: I think anybody that works a help desk should only have to work 5 years and get full retirement/disability for life -- u235 speaks wisdom Eagle's Nest BBS, 18 August 2006 %% wob: mmm wob: large coffee fart wob: yeah take that wob: i think I raised myself outa the chair by a few inches wob: oh geesus wob: afk I just gassed myself outa my own cube cerby: splatter? cerby: ahah wob: ahhhhh wob: I went and did a cropdusting lap around the cube area wob: spread the love around marcie: ahahaha marcie: excellent -- wob spreading the love Eagle's Nest BBS, 21 August 2006 %% ed: the freaks I see just wandering around in Alameda (freakish by Iowa Standards) were enough to warmly remind me of my location ed: and by warmly, I mean huge throbbing hardon that I couldn't keep down with a brick tied to a short length of rope -- ed loves Iowa Eagle's Nest BBS, 23 August 2006 %% ed: I stayed at my job for no fucking reason at all! ed: I'm an idiot! ed hangs head ed: sometimes the bogon field si so thick ed: it gives you brain dammage ed: and I'm positive thats what happened to me. ed: I'm a husk of my former self. ed: I'm lucky I can still go to the bathroom unaided, masturbate with only slight pain, and consume beer in healthy quantities -- ed the ill Eagle's Nest BBS, 29 August 2006 %% marcie kicks the fucking shit out of windows marcie: brand new laptop marcie: brand new load of XP janet: mmm janet: brand new pain. -- janet the windows admin Eagle's Nest BBS, 1 September 2006 %% cerby: there's a belch coming that's gonna make my nose hair self-braid. -- cerb after sushi Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 September 2006 %% DontKnow: pastry? How can a crossant kill? cerby: you've obviously never eaten a 2 day old starbucks croissant! DontKnow: right ed: cerb hasn't mentioned how or why he ate it ed: but I know cerby: stuck in an airport at 5:15am :( ed: he was monkey fucking around with handcuffs and ballgags while his wife was away ed: he ended up handcuffing himself to a junglegym with the ballgag engaged ed: after 16 hours of thrashing ed: he was able to dislocate his left hip and flop his leg at a trashcan and knock it over ed: where he found the crossant ed: just as he was about to sink his ballgag into it ed: Joe Homeless comes up ed: and urinates on him ed: cerby was forced to eat the crossant and take the golden shower like a man ed: he is now on the MA sex offenders list ed: Cerby is short for Golden Cerberus Eater of Old Baked Goods cerby: dude. pass the drugs around cerby: don't hog that shit. it must be good. ed: all I did is tough your thigh ed: I'm like that one guy from Lampoons Vacation ed: I touch shit ed: and my psychic powers kick in ed touches leo's nose ed: he's thinking about who is going to steal the gold in the pouch around his neck cerby: hahaah ed touches wob ed: he's thinking about how many fans have to have 1 bearing removed before no-one will hear the sounds of a screaming dothead stuffed under the datacenter floor ed touches dweez cerby: pussy. cerby: next. ed: he's thinking about the next virus storm, and how tightly he'll grab his ankles for Symantec marcie: ooh ooh me next me next! ed touches marcie ed: she's thinking about how far away from being an airforce tire-changer/closet dyke she is now. She wants to go back out with the boys to the strip club. marcie: werd marcie: ed is talented ed: DK is wondering how in the hell the movers could have broken his acrylic bust of Tommy Chong cerby: haha -- ed the psychic Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 September 2006 %% ed: if youw ant S&M, go visit Cerby ed: workign for AOL for 15 years has to be the longest session anyone has ever done -- cerb the masochist Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2006 %% ed kicks vanyel in the left buttock ed: lazy goddamned gold bag wearing jew bastid ed: marcie: how long until they issue your gold sack? ed: have youb een a good jew-in-training and been wearing your practice bag filled with lead? marcie: yes! marcie: i have learned to shamble properly with the lead bag intact ed: excellent marcie: i'm training my nose to grow into a hook and taking special nose-enlargement pills marcie: and i'm pretty sure i saw the beginnings of horns last time i got a haircut marcie: i'm so proud! ed: what about quick mathmatical calculations to ensure that anytime there is an opportunity to come out ahead monetarily, you will? ed: eg: marcie: yes marcie: practice sessions have ensued ed: buying the first round, when 3 people show up, versus buying a round later when 15 are there. marcie: now all i need is my special media pass ed: remember ed: in the end, the higher the stack of shekels, the better marcie: duh ed: you _can_ take it with you -- ed advising marcie on her jewness Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2006 %% cerby: hrm cerby: the EXACT same cat litter in bags (25lb) is like 40% cheaper than in a fucking plastic pail. cerby: goddammit. cerby: 27# for $10.49 (pail) versus 25# for $4.99 cerby: in a fucking bagf. cerby: next time that shit goes on sale, I'm buying the pallet. cerby: I WILL BE THE KING OF CAT SHIT cerby: err, maybe I shouldn't advertise that. -- cerby is our king Eagle's Nest BBS, 13 September 2006 %% Moni: heh..the wife is whining about being fat in her LJ Moni: not sure why that amuses me, but it does Moni: maybe it's because she's blaming it on a medical condition, when I saw her eating a snickers bar yesterday -- Moni's Big Beautiful Wife Eagle's Nest BBS, 26 September 2006 %% devil: okay, it's official devil: i never want to go to a bar again janet: awww janet: got a clingon? marcie: lies devil: my god, this one is the worst ever devil: after i fuck him, he won't shut up so i can go to sleep janet: has he moved up to 'stalker' yet? devil: i finally kicked him out when he started talking about moving in MsDNA: lol devil: next day, note and stuffed animal on my doorstep telling me he loves me and begging me to call MsDNA: oh no.. and you had just met him? devil: and now today, a massive basket of chocolates and another love note devil: i just brought him home for a fuck! MsDNA: that sounds very stalkerish devil: i didn't even know his name until i read his first note MsDNA: hehe janet: ahahahahahah MsDNA: I always hated guys like that devil: well, i guess i'll just have to be happy that i'm moving in a month MsDNA: I go for the hard to get guys MsDNA: yeah, don't leave a forwarding address heh devil: oh, he was hard to get at the bar, problem was when you got him home MsDNA: heh MsDNA: ugh I need to get motivated MsDNA: I need food devil: i'm considering stringing up the stuffed animal in a noose and hanging it from the door knob in case he comes back tomorrow -- devil's stalker boy Eagle's Nest BBS, 4 October 2006 %% cerby: GOOD MORNING cerby: PURVEYORS OF CONCENTRATED SUCK. -- cerb greeting the nerds Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 October 2006 %% cerby: there are things in life better than tripply nested shell loops, but if you don't count sex and beer, it's a short list. ed: quad nested perl forloops with empty else and if's and no die statements. cerby: just had to shit on my vision, didn't ya? ed: I had to dstroy it like an anus ed: because I am a purveyer of nasty fuckticated perlification like that described. ed: if's and no elses ed: nary a die in sight ed: code that if packed, run through md5, coms out with the string ed: "JOB SECURITY" over and over and over. cerby: whahaha -- cerby getting off Eagle's Nest BBS, 17 October 2006 %% DontKnow: you know, when you ask a question and are told that the answer violates the laws of physics, you know you're working in a screwed up environment. -- DK at work Eagle's Nest BBS, 19 October 2006 %% marcie: because i hate this place marcie: and i relish the opportunity to give them all the finger marcie: the only thing preventing me from quitting this identical minute is that it's easier to get a job if you already have one marcie: and i like money. marcie: i am planning my departure for maximum fuckage of management marcie: i.e., not come back from thanksgiving break marcie: when, on day 3 of my absense they call me, i'll say, "oh, you didn't get the email?" marcie: "i'm not cominh back, motherfuckers" marcie: "fuck you, your wives, and your small animals" ed: your children ed: your childrens children ed: your mistresses ed: your grandmas chihuuas marcie: unto the 7th generation ed: fuck you assholes with superglue coated rebar ed: fuck your wife with a syphlittic samon cock with endemic herpes ed: may your first meeting with your daughters boyfriend be via a screening of bang monsters 4: when pussies revolt marcie: hahahahaha marcie: yes! -- marcie at her shitty job Eagle's Nest BBS, 25 October 2006 %% Vanyel: thanks a shitton, man ed: save you some pain ed: save me having to look at 'em cerby: is a shitton a measure of time, space, or money? Vanyel: a shitton is 10x a shitload, and 100x a pantload, but 1/10 a fuckload. cerby: ahhhhhahahahaahha\ Vanyel: it's a load of volume ed: how does a buttload fit into that? Vanyel: pantload = 10x buttload cerby: 2-3 buttloads creates a pantsload? cerby: nah cerby: it wouldn't take 10 buttloads to filla a pantsload cerby: no way cerby: exhibit A: ed's recent turd-tacular splash episode ed: thats like a +5 butload ed: what are we giving as a pantsload volume? cerby: a pantsload volume, would be, say, the residuals from 5 pizzas ed: I'm thinking either: the seating area, or a filling of empty pants cerby: ooh. ed: see todays dilbert cerby: i htink it's just the seating area then -- shitmeasures Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 December 2006 %% Sarge: is anyone running windows vista with a netware network? marcie: do i look like a masochist? Vanyel: yes Sarge: actually marcie yes -- marcie the masochist Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 December 2006 %% Moni: I had a rather bad experience on Wednesday night mixing codein cough syrup with wine Moni: dont' do that -- Moni the substance abuse counselor Eagle's Nest BBS, 22 December 2006 %% Moni: Anna Nicole Smith Dies Moni: omg! marcie: what? ed: what! ed: those titties! ed: I know they were fake ed: and she was dumb as yesterdays turd ed: but Moni: http://tinyurl.com/2fh9r2 Moni: she proibably ODed Moni: her poor baby girl marcie: holy shit marcie: that sucks marcie: poor kid marcie: man, she looked a lot better when she was fat Moni: ya ed: she looked alot better 10 years ago when I masterbated to her every chance I got. marcie: aheheh ed: now it'd be like jacking off to a skeleton with nasty demons inside ed: no good for the stiffy ed: well ed: yesterday, rather ed: now it'd like jacking off to a dead, bloated, drug filled corpse ed: thou marcie: ahaha ed: I bet her IQ is atleast 50points higher now, than at the same time yesterday. marcie: ahahahhaah marcie: damn dude, you are so going to hell marcie: we like that about you Moni calmly wipes the diet coke off of her keyboard ed: sorry man -- RIP Anna Nicole Eagle's Nest BBS, 8 February 2007 %% cerby: my sock will be covered in dried horse cum cerby: or maybe not dry after all. cerby: wait cerby: taken out of context, that sounded REALLY bad -- cerb's fantasy Eagle's Nest BBS, 12 February 2007 %% Vanyel: Oh man I love boobs marcie: well don't we all! Vanyel: I love boobs I can bury my face into and go BLURGLAHGLAHLGHLEGAASBARHBRLE marcie: hahahahaha marcie: yes! marcie: me too! marcie: this is why i have the girlfriend i have! marcie: she might even let you do that to her if you give her enough vodka martinis ;) Moni: \mm Moni: bnoobs Moni: and boobs Vanyel: BNOOBS Vanyel: as I get older, I turn into a more and more typical male marcie: me too Moni: I've just turned into a bitch Vanyel: awesome. marcie: atta girl Vanyel: no wonder I like you so much more now Moni: f'ing sexy bitch, to be exact Moni: and here I thought it was because of my bnoobs Vanyel: well they help -- boobs, bitches, and boys Eagle's Nest BBS, 15 February 2007 %%